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July 23, 2004 at 12:00 AM
Well... have some stuff to say about this fic...
First of all, it was kinda boring... No offence, the idea is good it's just that you add on too much and then I get uninterested when you start to rant. But good try though.
You need to be more 'to the point', so to speak. Like I said before I really like the idea, but it could use some work.
You need to explain the story better, put more background to Will and where he lives and so on and so forth. It might even help you might you chapters longer ^^;
Anyway, just work on it.
Props from,
Mercury Tears
First of all, it was kinda boring... No offence, the idea is good it's just that you add on too much and then I get uninterested when you start to rant. But good try though.
You need to be more 'to the point', so to speak. Like I said before I really like the idea, but it could use some work.
You need to explain the story better, put more background to Will and where he lives and so on and so forth. It might even help you might you chapters longer ^^;
Anyway, just work on it.
Props from,
Mercury Tears
schedule
July 23, 2004 at 12:00 AM
what are you talking about? if it's long, the only way you'll get hurt is from extra happy hugs flying at you, at least from this direction.
I just read both chapters for the first time. I thought the first was a good start, but you seemed to be laying it on a little thick with the actors' alternate characters(first Legolas, and then Sam...one or the other would have been good, or at least not in such close proximity, ya know?) - still, it made me want to read the second, and here I am, pleading with you to update soon, so I see see what interesting things you've done with our favorite Captain, and where it goes from there.
I'll be looking for your update!
I just read both chapters for the first time. I thought the first was a good start, but you seemed to be laying it on a little thick with the actors' alternate characters(first Legolas, and then Sam...one or the other would have been good, or at least not in such close proximity, ya know?) - still, it made me want to read the second, and here I am, pleading with you to update soon, so I see see what interesting things you've done with our favorite Captain, and where it goes from there.
I'll be looking for your update!
schedule
July 23, 2004 at 12:00 AM
Putting the people to sleep is a good place to stop, at least you didn't have a cliff hanger. If you never have a cliff hanger you'll be my new best friend. Poor poor Will. I love it when he suffers. That doesn't make me a bad person, right? Hmmmmm nah. Good chapter. -Dea Puella
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July 17, 2004 at 12:00 AM
More please.
so love this fic!!!!!!
oh shit it's 4 am bugger, bugger, bugger, I g2g ttyl buh bye
Sincerly
Van Helsing's Bitch
P.S. please up date soon ^-^ o_o @_@ ^_~ :P (I like making the lil' face! hee hee)
so love this fic!!!!!!
oh shit it's 4 am bugger, bugger, bugger, I g2g ttyl buh bye
Sincerly
Van Helsing's Bitch
P.S. please up date soon ^-^ o_o @_@ ^_~ :P (I like making the lil' face! hee hee)
schedule
July 16, 2004 at 12:00 AM
YAY! an update!
*bounces happily*
that was great, I am curious if Liz's parents (parent?) know that Will shows up at their house most nights...
as for Will's dad getting nicer... I really think that has to do with how the rest of the story goes, if you can work in him coming to terms with the death of his wife and how that has affected his relationship with his son, than by all means, make him nice at the end, but since the story is more about Will, I think that will be difficult. Unless something tramatic happens to Will (other than being beaten by his father) that snaps him bacto rto reality.
I can't wait for more! Update soon please :)
*bounces happily*
that was great, I am curious if Liz's parents (parent?) know that Will shows up at their house most nights...
as for Will's dad getting nicer... I really think that has to do with how the rest of the story goes, if you can work in him coming to terms with the death of his wife and how that has affected his relationship with his son, than by all means, make him nice at the end, but since the story is more about Will, I think that will be difficult. Unless something tramatic happens to Will (other than being beaten by his father) that snaps him bacto rto reality.
I can't wait for more! Update soon please :)
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July 14, 2004 at 12:00 AM
That is a very nice bonus hint. That's really funny. Barbie does have brushable hair! Poor poor Will, he needs a big hug! I think we both know who needs to give him his hug too. Go update right now, so Will can get his hug and I can get my slash fix. -Dea Puella
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July 14, 2004 at 12:00 AM
A fine beggining, the flashback to happier times gave it a grounding. And hell who wouldn't fall for 'Sam'?
Looking forward to seeing where you take this.
Awk
Looking forward to seeing where you take this.
Awk
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July 10, 2004 at 12:00 AM
Wow.
I don't care for child abuse, but I think you've got a really good story idea.
I can't wait to see how Will and Jack meet and their interaction.
Although I really hope that Will's dad clues in and gets some help *nods*
can't wait for more :D
I don't care for child abuse, but I think you've got a really good story idea.
I can't wait to see how Will and Jack meet and their interaction.
Although I really hope that Will's dad clues in and gets some help *nods*
can't wait for more :D
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July 9, 2004 at 12:00 AM
It sucks. lmao, of course it doesn't. It is superb. Many will come from interspace miles around to view this work of art and sing its praise. Yes. What the hell else was i going to say? Ah yes... I'm glad you *finally* got it up. The pirates are pleased. They'll be over with handcuffs and lotion within the hour ;)
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March 24, 1920 at 12:00 AM
Wow, this is a really good AU. And believe me i have read plenty. I like Will's in charecter yet not personality and i like how you didn't make Liz the Enemy. And the hints at Viggo and Johnny in their prospective movies was great. I can't wait to read the next chappie.