rate_review Reviews

I swear I was holding my breath while reading this!! Oh my...the scene in the cellar was simply brilliant!! Innocence, fear, longing, regret...so many emotions there, so beautifully written. I can't wait to read the next part because you've literally left us hanging, wondering what/when/how something will develop between them:)

Fantastic story, please don't end it here. I'm very excited to see what happens between Evie and Joe ^^

Hugs,
Rie

FANTASTIC NUIT!

five stars *****

I loved that last bit!! Ack cant wait till the next addition- you are brilliant!!

Steph

Hey. *waves* I don't know if you recognize me from the OL board, but just popping in to say that I love your story. It looks like you actually took the time to so a little research with the history of the Irish in Australia, the politcs etc. Anyhow, I hope keep on hammering this one out until the very end.

Well I am trying to review, but can barely see the screen. Your dialogue and relationships are so true to life, what it is like between young women, and young men, sharing confidences/ egging each other on, as in the case of Aaron and Joe maybe. really well done, took me back a while. It's not that though strangely, that affects me most, here it's your throw away phrases that say so much. Every sentence is a treasure.
For instance chapter 3, Joe weighing Evie by different scales, what a profound interaction, a sexual moment, a second when everything was communicated but nothing was said . Here her reaction to saying his name, yes something I (and most of us no doubt) can definitely relate to. The drunkards leaving the tavern and going home... 'well as far as they could get'.. each of these half sentences conjures a whole world and just stabs me to the core. I loved your closing sentence to this chapter, such a subtle teasing, perfectly Joe Byrne way of imparting information. Phew, love him to death but Evie's going to have to get her strength up to be a match for this bugger. Brilliant. Hey don't update too fast, it takes a while to digest it all. :) but yes another fantastic chapter.

This story is so gorgeoulsy written I am in awe. The descriptions, the details, all so wonderfully done you can't help but magine you are right there, on the sidelines, watching it all unfold. The scene where the two girls are discussing their most intimate secrets is simply perfect; awkward, endearing, makes you ache for their innocence and the loss of it. Joe is a character I love and you write him spot on. To me, the mark of a good story and a good writer is getting the characters to ring true and you've managed to not only write a perfect Joe, you've enhanced the character with little traits that fit him to a tee. Bravo!! A beautiful tale that has me fully captivated and on the edge of my seat waiting for more.

I'm really enjoying your story. Your subtle use of dialect is very well orchestrated. I also like the way you made your OFC a real person instead of a Mary Sue. Keep up the good writing; I hope you post more soon.

Absolutely wonderful. The characters of everyone come through in your words and dialogue. Aaron, Maggie the coppers, and especially the original ones, which is great skill. Tom who owns the bar, Evie of course and both her parents. not necesarry for you to describe these people in aphysical way because the reader gets such a vivid impression of them in their owm imaginations anyway.

You use expressive similes and metaphors, from the short 'working like wombats' to 'cautious of stepping in abog he was just beginning to see the edge of. Everything you write is so real, the girl talk with Maggie to the erotic voyeurism of the sex scene, Evie's jumbled emotions on the matter to Maggie's feelings.

You write the religion well. The Hail Mary's linked to rhythm of the lovemaking were spot on as were Evie's feelings and turmoil at confession.

I loved the way you used history lessons for the reader and the social injustice, to link Evie's Dad with Joe's father, to give them a link and a shared past and fate and a reason to give Joe an inborn sense of justice and rebellion and Evie another reason in her mind to draw close to Joe, despite her worry about the ethics and morality of it all and her concern for Maggie.

It's brilliant. I know you're only up to chapter 3, but I would place bets on this winning all awards for best Joe Bryne fanfic ever. And that's how it should be.

Well the story takes my breath away, and it’s hard to pick out pieces when it makes me feel as if I am living inside it but will do my best.

I love the nerous Spring and Evie’s mortification at seeing Joe and Maggie and how worried she is that he will see it in her face – which knowing Joe, he probably would!

Me Ma, who never could stand a silence however full it was already, was intent on jamming it with all sorts of words that I can’t now recall – this is such a fantastic visual image about something that is sound.

You do an incredible job of conveying a lot of historical information and family background while never losing the tone or the sense of a father talking to his daughter – which I have to say I think is where the genius of the chapter lies.

The honest and vulnerability with which he speaks to his daughter, they way they love one another and take care of one another, is just exquisite. I can’t wait for more.

This story is absolutely great. Please go on. M.