schedule
October 16, 2006 at 12:00 AM
As promised, so delivered! I always try to devote some extra effort for fic reviews where the fic itself obviously took a lot of effort itself. Like I said in the comments for your Secretary series, this work shines the brightest of all the Wayne/Crane smut you've done. It's consistently been one I've recommended to genre-curious buddies of mine, and if you'll pardon the frankness, the printout I keep of it has also served as one hell of a fun indirect sleep aid every once in a while.
>Bruce snorted. “You always ask, Alfred, you just don’t use words.”
“I am sorry, sir. I’ll try not to not ask about your sexual escapades any longer.”>
To begin with: Alfred ROCKS. And I mean that in general, too. He's a good yardstick for characterization in any piece, simply because he has such awesome dialogue; he's the walking embodiment of that snarky reply we wish we could've come up with immediately, instead of at three in the morning two days later. You not only pulled off some damned stellar lines for him (you might be amused to know, "I'm far too British for this nonsense" has popped up a couple times in real-life conversations between my buddies and me-- MAN, but that's a perfect line!), but also capture how he serves as Bruce's supporting beams, so to speak-- through little things, like bothering to mention the pizza sauce on Bruce's face without saying a word. Just his style.
>Crane’s voice was soft and shaky but very clear.>
...Which brings me to the other guy who'd be hard to write on his best days, much less while tanked up on his own brain-warpers! You've got an almost eerily-comfortable knack for keeping Crane's mannerisms in-character (for example, capturing the tone of his spoken lines, as quoted above), to an extent seldom seen in other fics I've read, and for that alone, I applaud you. Considering how comparatively short Crane's screen time was in the movie itself, you offer the readers one better, constructing characterization past the boundaries of the film that consistently make sense, seem _right_, based on what we've seen of him-- everything from his obsessive orderliness to how his seduction technique is five parts cerebral for each bit of actual lust. (A hero's only as interesting as his villains, after all!)
>“I try, but I can’t fight back the Scarecrow for long.”
“Why are you even trying?” Bruce was genuinely puzzled.
“Because it’s my mind,” Crane spit out. “I won’t lose it to a drug.”>
Gotta admit, I never thought of this possibility before reading "Sessions"-- that Crane might actively _despise_ his alter ego. But, again, you make it make sense. Yes, to a brilliant psychiatrist with control issues, it _would_ probably be somewhat chafing to wrestle with a "man wearing a burlap sack on his head"-- a persona he'd not only know the neuroses behind and logical explanations for, but would still be powerless to beat away for long.
As for the story itself, may I just say: holy crap, porn with a PLOT! That fits with what happened in the movie, even!! ...Ahem. I like the idea that the fear-gas complications wouldn't clear up so easily. Neither Batman nor Gotham City seem like they'd have that kind of good luck. And the background you give for the Joker and Harley Quinn is friggin' _genius._
>“Oh, honestly, Batman, you can stand there and make sure I don’t pollute your water if it bothers you that much,” Crane said with a polite snarl, his eyes back to being cold and calculating.>
See? You can even work in canon-based justification for a shower scene! Now _that's_ talent.
>When he thought they were secure he looped another chain through the first sets and padlocked it to a nearby support beam.>
That's Batman for you... "Secure" is never enough.
>Crane screamed wordlessly, his sore head smacking against the stone table under him with a wet crack.>
Ow. OWW. Nice word choice. Made me wince while reading it.
>Crane finally cried out fully, his face contorting in pain. Bruce watched, mesmerized. He hurt so damn pretty.>
>Bruce watched Crane yawn, his long delicate tongue curling up to the roof of his mouth.>
>[...]fevered fantasies about the Batman ending their second meeting by throwing Crane on the ground and fucking him until the walls stopped moving.>
...Mmm.
>“I—,” Crane began, breathlessly, his voice no longer mocking or certain.>
Heh heh... Bruce's ultimate fantasy is getting Crane to shut up. I love it...
>[...]and a well-sharpened pencil situated perfectly parallel to the bottoms of the books.>
>He breathed in deeply and tried to avoid doing what he’d rather die than do. Bruce asked before he had to.
“You need some help with that?”>
>Crane began washing his hair, frowning slightly as dried blood came out with the shampoo.>
>Anybody watching Crane would have had no idea as to where his thoughts were save for a slow blink and a sudden sniff as he forced his mind away from the enemy’s perfect body. However Crane was horrified over the slip[...]>
>It had the clean impersonal look of a place where a man slept but didn’t necessarily live in.>
It's the little things like these that prove you've got his character down so well.
>Bruce fought against and finally couldn’t resist the urge to straighten the doctor’s glasses on his thin face.
Crane blinked sleepily at Bruce, an action which seemed odd as he’d blinked only rarely since they’d first met.
“Thank you,” he murmured and despite himself Bruce felt warmed.>
Looks like he's learned to speak in the Doc's own language. Very nice.
>Crane’s soft mouth worked wordlessly for a moment as the doctor appeared to shockingly not know what to say. Bruce stopped fighting himself and rubbed his now aching erection firmly against Crane’s.>
Uh oh. Too close to his fantasy scenario for the poor guy to resist making his move?
>Crane made the sound of a caged and frustrated animal[...]>
A rat? Heh... clever callback to earlier in the chapter, if it was intentional.
>Crane was used to people being larger than him. Hell, even that vapid piece of fluff from the DA’s office was taller than he was.>
...You know, you're right! Didn't even notice that...
>Bruce was glaring fiercely at him and something primal in Crane reacted to the heat in his eyes.>
Fire versus ice? Nice parallel for the two of them, really... though it's also been done to death in fanfics, so I'm actually kind of grateful you haven't stuck to any particular metaphors throughout the chapters.
>Crane tapped his fingers lightly on the case, smiling slightly at the intricate design around the knuckle spikes. He had fond memories of those spikes.>
Nice foreshadowing, for a memory.
>Bruce gestured to Crane’s obvious erection. “That tells me that you’re lying.”>
Same logic Crane used before, used against him... heh. Would make sense for Batman to try it. On that note: acknowledging that an erection doesn't equal _mental_ willingness to have sex? In a slashfic, of all places?! Thank you thank you THANK you! (Especially since an honor-bound guy like Bruce would be going seriously past out-of-character if he _did_ jump him anyway...)
>Batman wondered if Gordon had been allowed to search the apartment. Somehow he doubted it.>
Good callback to Gotham as more than just a backdrop. Mentions like these help breathe some life into the setting.
A couple 'oops'-es I noticed, included for completeness's sake:
>Bruce came furiously into his hand, his teeth clenched tightly to prevent any noises from escaping. He stare[[d]] down his sweat-covered bare body and sighed once more.>
>A disappointed sigh that somehow hurt [['more'?]] than anything else. “You’re making very poor progress, Jonathan.”>
And, to conclude (until the next time you update, of course):
>“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Bruce growled, resisting the urge to shake the doctor until his teeth rattled.
“That seems obvious to me but I do have a doctorate.[...]>
>He began with the tip of the sword, how it was sharp and long, and admired its beauty, its ability to penetrate smoothly—
And that wasn’t helping either.>
>He was sick to his growling stomach with the Batman.>
>The smile was back a moment later. “Trick or treat. What are you supposed to be?”
A pause for dramatic license. “The Scarecrow!”>
>“Which one is it, Crane?” It was the low growl of the monster that hides in closets and a collection of sharp-looking syringes were thrust before his face.>
>“I was going to say liquid eraser.” Crane’s grin was toothy as he regarded Batman through tilted glasses. “What on earth were you thinking of?”>
>Crane’s legs started swinging back and forth again. It was really like watching a child at a doctor’s exam.>
>He went to the dresser next to collect socks and discovered that Crane was a briefs man.>
Did I mention yet how your dialogue/word choice is awesome? 'Cause it's really, really, _really_ awesome.
--Apricot
(hlgoltz@smumn.edu)
>Bruce snorted. “You always ask, Alfred, you just don’t use words.”
“I am sorry, sir. I’ll try not to not ask about your sexual escapades any longer.”>
To begin with: Alfred ROCKS. And I mean that in general, too. He's a good yardstick for characterization in any piece, simply because he has such awesome dialogue; he's the walking embodiment of that snarky reply we wish we could've come up with immediately, instead of at three in the morning two days later. You not only pulled off some damned stellar lines for him (you might be amused to know, "I'm far too British for this nonsense" has popped up a couple times in real-life conversations between my buddies and me-- MAN, but that's a perfect line!), but also capture how he serves as Bruce's supporting beams, so to speak-- through little things, like bothering to mention the pizza sauce on Bruce's face without saying a word. Just his style.
>Crane’s voice was soft and shaky but very clear.>
...Which brings me to the other guy who'd be hard to write on his best days, much less while tanked up on his own brain-warpers! You've got an almost eerily-comfortable knack for keeping Crane's mannerisms in-character (for example, capturing the tone of his spoken lines, as quoted above), to an extent seldom seen in other fics I've read, and for that alone, I applaud you. Considering how comparatively short Crane's screen time was in the movie itself, you offer the readers one better, constructing characterization past the boundaries of the film that consistently make sense, seem _right_, based on what we've seen of him-- everything from his obsessive orderliness to how his seduction technique is five parts cerebral for each bit of actual lust. (A hero's only as interesting as his villains, after all!)
>“I try, but I can’t fight back the Scarecrow for long.”
“Why are you even trying?” Bruce was genuinely puzzled.
“Because it’s my mind,” Crane spit out. “I won’t lose it to a drug.”>
Gotta admit, I never thought of this possibility before reading "Sessions"-- that Crane might actively _despise_ his alter ego. But, again, you make it make sense. Yes, to a brilliant psychiatrist with control issues, it _would_ probably be somewhat chafing to wrestle with a "man wearing a burlap sack on his head"-- a persona he'd not only know the neuroses behind and logical explanations for, but would still be powerless to beat away for long.
As for the story itself, may I just say: holy crap, porn with a PLOT! That fits with what happened in the movie, even!! ...Ahem. I like the idea that the fear-gas complications wouldn't clear up so easily. Neither Batman nor Gotham City seem like they'd have that kind of good luck. And the background you give for the Joker and Harley Quinn is friggin' _genius._
>“Oh, honestly, Batman, you can stand there and make sure I don’t pollute your water if it bothers you that much,” Crane said with a polite snarl, his eyes back to being cold and calculating.>
See? You can even work in canon-based justification for a shower scene! Now _that's_ talent.
>When he thought they were secure he looped another chain through the first sets and padlocked it to a nearby support beam.>
That's Batman for you... "Secure" is never enough.
>Crane screamed wordlessly, his sore head smacking against the stone table under him with a wet crack.>
Ow. OWW. Nice word choice. Made me wince while reading it.
>Crane finally cried out fully, his face contorting in pain. Bruce watched, mesmerized. He hurt so damn pretty.>
>Bruce watched Crane yawn, his long delicate tongue curling up to the roof of his mouth.>
>[...]fevered fantasies about the Batman ending their second meeting by throwing Crane on the ground and fucking him until the walls stopped moving.>
...Mmm.
>“I—,” Crane began, breathlessly, his voice no longer mocking or certain.>
Heh heh... Bruce's ultimate fantasy is getting Crane to shut up. I love it...
>[...]and a well-sharpened pencil situated perfectly parallel to the bottoms of the books.>
>He breathed in deeply and tried to avoid doing what he’d rather die than do. Bruce asked before he had to.
“You need some help with that?”>
>Crane began washing his hair, frowning slightly as dried blood came out with the shampoo.>
>Anybody watching Crane would have had no idea as to where his thoughts were save for a slow blink and a sudden sniff as he forced his mind away from the enemy’s perfect body. However Crane was horrified over the slip[...]>
>It had the clean impersonal look of a place where a man slept but didn’t necessarily live in.>
It's the little things like these that prove you've got his character down so well.
>Bruce fought against and finally couldn’t resist the urge to straighten the doctor’s glasses on his thin face.
Crane blinked sleepily at Bruce, an action which seemed odd as he’d blinked only rarely since they’d first met.
“Thank you,” he murmured and despite himself Bruce felt warmed.>
Looks like he's learned to speak in the Doc's own language. Very nice.
>Crane’s soft mouth worked wordlessly for a moment as the doctor appeared to shockingly not know what to say. Bruce stopped fighting himself and rubbed his now aching erection firmly against Crane’s.>
Uh oh. Too close to his fantasy scenario for the poor guy to resist making his move?
>Crane made the sound of a caged and frustrated animal[...]>
A rat? Heh... clever callback to earlier in the chapter, if it was intentional.
>Crane was used to people being larger than him. Hell, even that vapid piece of fluff from the DA’s office was taller than he was.>
...You know, you're right! Didn't even notice that...
>Bruce was glaring fiercely at him and something primal in Crane reacted to the heat in his eyes.>
Fire versus ice? Nice parallel for the two of them, really... though it's also been done to death in fanfics, so I'm actually kind of grateful you haven't stuck to any particular metaphors throughout the chapters.
>Crane tapped his fingers lightly on the case, smiling slightly at the intricate design around the knuckle spikes. He had fond memories of those spikes.>
Nice foreshadowing, for a memory.
>Bruce gestured to Crane’s obvious erection. “That tells me that you’re lying.”>
Same logic Crane used before, used against him... heh. Would make sense for Batman to try it. On that note: acknowledging that an erection doesn't equal _mental_ willingness to have sex? In a slashfic, of all places?! Thank you thank you THANK you! (Especially since an honor-bound guy like Bruce would be going seriously past out-of-character if he _did_ jump him anyway...)
>Batman wondered if Gordon had been allowed to search the apartment. Somehow he doubted it.>
Good callback to Gotham as more than just a backdrop. Mentions like these help breathe some life into the setting.
A couple 'oops'-es I noticed, included for completeness's sake:
>Bruce came furiously into his hand, his teeth clenched tightly to prevent any noises from escaping. He stare[[d]] down his sweat-covered bare body and sighed once more.>
>A disappointed sigh that somehow hurt [['more'?]] than anything else. “You’re making very poor progress, Jonathan.”>
And, to conclude (until the next time you update, of course):
>“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Bruce growled, resisting the urge to shake the doctor until his teeth rattled.
“That seems obvious to me but I do have a doctorate.[...]>
>He began with the tip of the sword, how it was sharp and long, and admired its beauty, its ability to penetrate smoothly—
And that wasn’t helping either.>
>He was sick to his growling stomach with the Batman.>
>The smile was back a moment later. “Trick or treat. What are you supposed to be?”
A pause for dramatic license. “The Scarecrow!”>
>“Which one is it, Crane?” It was the low growl of the monster that hides in closets and a collection of sharp-looking syringes were thrust before his face.>
>“I was going to say liquid eraser.” Crane’s grin was toothy as he regarded Batman through tilted glasses. “What on earth were you thinking of?”>
>Crane’s legs started swinging back and forth again. It was really like watching a child at a doctor’s exam.>
>He went to the dresser next to collect socks and discovered that Crane was a briefs man.>
Did I mention yet how your dialogue/word choice is awesome? 'Cause it's really, really, _really_ awesome.
--Apricot
(hlgoltz@smumn.edu)
schedule
July 2, 2006 at 12:00 AM
hey nice chapters but still less intimacy between bruce n crane plzzzzzzz continue n add more chapters....
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January 19, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Had me hooked from the beginning and I read all of the chapters instead of required reading for school. I do hope you update soon. I'm dying to see how it turns out.
schedule
January 11, 2006 at 12:00 AM
O_______________O *deadeadeadeadeadeadeadead*
OMG....wowness..I lovew this, the intereactions are believable and incredibley funny, it makes for a great romance/smut story.
I love JonJon's snarkiness, especially when it comes to Batman.
And also, I like how JonJon differentiates himself from the Scarecrow, definate MPD, except he seems to be aware of it, as he is a psychiatrist himself, and Bruce with the whole martyr/hero complex versus his whole wanting to fuck Crane into a wall/Wanting to tie Crane up and feed him to his bats.
It makes for a wonderful, interesting read, do update soon, I look forward to more Snarky JonJon commentary, especially when he realizes that the Bat has gone looking through his toy drawer.
*laughs*
Morri
OMG....wowness..I lovew this, the intereactions are believable and incredibley funny, it makes for a great romance/smut story.
I love JonJon's snarkiness, especially when it comes to Batman.
And also, I like how JonJon differentiates himself from the Scarecrow, definate MPD, except he seems to be aware of it, as he is a psychiatrist himself, and Bruce with the whole martyr/hero complex versus his whole wanting to fuck Crane into a wall/Wanting to tie Crane up and feed him to his bats.
It makes for a wonderful, interesting read, do update soon, I look forward to more Snarky JonJon commentary, especially when he realizes that the Bat has gone looking through his toy drawer.
*laughs*
Morri
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January 11, 2006 at 12:00 AM
>> Just realized we used the same names to post under *snerk*
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January 5, 2006 at 12:00 AM
OMG this was great! I loved it, and you have Crane and Bruce's characters to a "t'" honestly well done! This is my fav Crane/Wayne fic yet! I hope you update soon, and to think all those things in Cranes appartment! I giggled when batman empited the entire drawer! LOL Cant wait to see what happens, man I want crane to give in more than Wayne does ! LOL take care
Pamela
Pamela
schedule
December 30, 2005 at 12:00 AM
I love this fic please wright more your wonderful!
schedule
December 29, 2005 at 12:00 AM
*Bounces* I am so, SO, FREAKIN' excited to read the rest of this story. I love your writing and I LOVE JONATHAN!!! I even love that name. "Jonathan!" *squeals* I can't wait. I just can't. I'm feeling sad for poor rejected Brucie. *sigh* But oh, well. He'll live....at least...he'd better. ^ ^ Please keep up the good (AMAZING) work. ~T
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December 15, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Wow. I love it! Please continue!!!! (Hahaha, I loved the ending of this chapter hahahaha)
schedule
December 10, 2005 at 12:00 AM
i don't know where you are goin wiht this story but is it wrong of me to hope its in the direction of crane giving batman what he wants and realizing that bruse won't kill him in a bat infested corner... cuz this is hot and they are both lonely and brillant, oh and apparently like kinky roughness