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for False Dawn

by Chriscent

person Azreal
schedule December 8, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Wow! i really like your story, it has a plot line that I am really excited about. Even teh OCC of Riddick is ok I mean he is kinda shocked and there for acting out of charater. I can't wait for teh next chapter.
person bebe
schedule December 7, 2005 at 12:00 AM
good...im running out of stuff to say....its good....
person bebe
schedule November 29, 2005 at 12:00 AM
cool chappie...
person bebe
schedule November 23, 2005 at 12:00 AM
woooo did a good job *cookies 4 u*
person bebe-RIP eddie
schedule November 18, 2005 at 12:00 AM
this is such a cool story...only one critique, slow down on the "honey" and "baby" talk. i kindof...dulls his character.....if you get me? but otherwise great job (-:.
person Chriscent
schedule November 18, 2005 at 12:00 AM
bebe, you are so right!! I wrote this a while back and now, reading it, I see how out of character he is. My Riddicks now are much harder. I've considering fixing this but it would be a vast undertaking.

So, forgive me for it being a bit out of character. Jack will make up for it in the end.

And I still hold to the opinion that Riddick can change, but that it can't be instanteous. Riddick can be NICE!! It just has to be a slow subtle change and I don't think this was. I think it came to fast, too much, and too F*CKING SWEET! So, thank you for your opinion, I *completely* agree with you! :-D

Chris
person bebe
schedule November 14, 2005 at 12:00 AM
oh my gosh no!...poor jack...poor riddick...i felt so bad when i read that... it was a realli good chapter...
person bebe
schedule November 9, 2005 at 12:00 AM
omg, noooo....goshness, i hope there isnt alot of angst......that was a good chapter...your actually a good writer.
person Sandy
schedule November 9, 2005 at 12:00 AM
More, i need moooore! Pretty please?
person bebe
schedule November 4, 2005 at 12:00 AM
that was a really good chapter...