rate_review Reviews

wow. i so can't imagine jack walking away from that...but a beautiful fic. i love your writing. wonderful!

girl, you just made my day.
i was sailing the endless seas of boring and bad written fanfic, when i stumbled over your story.
is this really your first? very well done.
thanks a lot and keep on writing. i now will move on to your next story.

And I was right. Here's another lovely piece of yours. Very, very nice. I like the fact that you actually showed Jack living up to the ideas that he and Elizabeth discussed in DMC. He can be a good man when he choses to be, and you have him making choices (as in DMC), not just letting luck bring everything his way (CotBP). I think I saw a sequel before I started this one. Now I'm going to go read that one. I look forward to seeing what happens.
Oh, and the sexual interactions that I have read so far are very tastfully written and so very well suited to the characters. Bravo.

That was REALLY good! I'm moving on the sequel next. Jack and Lizz all the way! >D

This story is delicious. The symbolism of the shackles is witty and sexy, and Elizabeth's thoughts and actions fit marvelously to her canon character. I especially enjoy the idea of Jack's "revenge", which was plotted very well in his own character, particularly in that he was aware of her unwilling desire for him.

However, the ending was disappointing. Without consummation, the story's theme becomes little more than a cruel tease. Although the story is quite well written and enjoyable, it is a fanfiction, and one that is centered on sexual tension which increases without, no pun intended, any climax. Most people reading it will be eagerly expecting what Jack and Elizabeth are eagerly expecting, and will likely be somewhat annoyed by the ending.

All in all, it's a lovely story...very sensuous and dramatic, with crafty characterisations, and enjoyable settings. Even so, I do think that the lack of actual intercourse after a lengthy passage of serious foreplay and build-up is an important flaw...I would agree with Jack's issue with Elizabeth's virginity, but if you're unwilling to have him actually finish what he began, it might be best to leave the interaction at kissing and nothing more.

Also, consider: many women who are virgins do not possess hymens. Mine was lost to the edge of a slippery swimming pool I was attempting to exit in the dark seven years before I had any sort of sex. Plenty of young women break their hymens in similar manner-- and Elizabeth, at this point, though she was previously a proper young lady, has been disguised as a man and doubtless has been doing athletic things which certainly may have torn her. Will Turner is not a sexist or narrow-minded man, and there is no reason that he would refuse to believe she had broken her hymen in this manner, and not through intercourse.

Aileen - thanks so much for your comments. You make some important points about the direction of the story, and while it was something that I just sat down and wrote, sorry that the ending was disappointing (and you're not the first one to feel that way, which is part of why I wrote Devil's Bargain as the sequel) but I did content-describe it as "UST" - unresolved sexual tension - because this was my initial view of the characters after the film.

The question for me was: Does Jack want to hurt her, ruin her, destroy her for what she has done? My first opinion was, he THINKS he does, but deep down, Jack is "good" and cares about Elizabeth in a more adult, mature way that even she cannot fully grasp due to her naivete. While it's true that many virgin women do not have hymens, many do, and the Elizabeth in my story does - because losing her virginity to Jack before her marriage would be something momumental, in my opinion. In this story, she doesn't know what's going on, but Jack does. And he saves her, even though she has destroyed him. This deep caring side of Jack is a figment of my imagination and it comes back in the sequel ("Devil's Bargain") too.

BUT. This was my initial, but not complete, vision of these characters after DMC, which is why I wrote "Evil Lady E". The question: Does Jack want... to hurt her? Yes. Punish her? Yes. But he also wants to have her, and she wants to have him, but they nearly kill each other before that can occur. And neither Jack nor Elizabeth are "good". He still "saves" her but it is a much nearer thing, and the more cruel, extreme version is what I ultimate feel the most comfortable with.

Thanks so much for reading and for your thoughts. Email anytime.

WOW...that was very good for your first one...I really enjoyed this one

I loved this story!!!!!

wow.. this is just GREAT. very descriptive - i could easily picture everything (ehehe). please do more like this.

Wow, that was amazingly good.
I loooooved it.
You portrayed Jack perfectly, and using the movie was genius, and you did it so well!
Bravo!
Oh, and Encore!