rate_review Reviews

The story was very good. I think you held true to Norrington’s character very well in the midst of strife and trouble. Some of your lines for Jack became awkward, however. You were trying far too hard to get his paradoxes in there and it didn’t really come out right. The last one was very nice though

Rapunzel you're so gentle! *hugs* Yes! I know! And I agree and HAD thought about the whole marriage issue in the beginning, but really couldn't come by a reason that satisfied me and so I held off. I did know I need Governor Swann to "root for Norrington" so Elizabeth would not have him as an out.

So you guys know... my next chapter is coming up TOMORROW!

I really do like this story, and I'm eager to find out what happens next, so I hope you'll take the criticism as just an opinion, and a suggestion, and not as someone trying to be hurtful.

I think the situation you're writing about is a wonderful device, and a great conflict to write around: having Elizabeth being forced to marry Norrington, and longing for Will. But I don't buy the reason she marries Norrington. For me, it doesn't hold water, because in those times, while a gentleman may not break off an engagement as a matter of honor, a lady is certainly allowed to break off an engagement, and the gentleman involved is obligated to acquiesce. She also has her father, the governor no less, to back her up, so if she chose to break it off, she can.

You need a stronger reason for her to marry Norrington, such as the Commodore reminding her (as you have him do in a later chapter) what he went through on her behalf to save Will, and perhaps, since Will is in trouble with the law again, Norrington can blackmail Elizabeth (not maliciously yet, since I get the sense you don't want him to be quite that nasty at this point) into marrying him, saying he can keep Will from the gallows if she marries him.

This is just a couple thoughts I had, and nothing that you may have already thought of and rejected, wanting to develop your story and characters in a certain way. I just wanted to let you know what I thought as a reader.

Again, I really do like this story, and I think it's headed in a good direction, so keep it up!

Love it so far! Update soon, please?!!

Oooo, hey look! I can review my own story! Aye, Flower Lady, we may! ^_^ I'm really glad I decided to break this story down. Chapter one consisted of 18 pages on word, so I think its easier on you guys if I update 4-6 pages at a time. Much better on the eyes, methinks! ^^

This story is really good...and different in that Elizabeth married James...

Can't wait for more...

Will we meet up with a certain Pirate Captain in Turtuga?

FL

Fantastic! I can't wait to read more.
I'm not a Norrington fan so this is going down well for certain.
I want to know what happens in Tortuga providing they get there!
Update soon!

What a wonderful chapter! I simply loved how he scaled the wall to her bedroom, like a night in shining armor... I hope you add more soon!

This is very well written but I'm a little confused. Why is Norrington such an asshole?

Great job on chapter two, totally not what I was expecting. This story is so good!