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November 21, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I love this story so far. It has such a good plot. The romance to it is astounding sence you didnt have your characters F**king in the first scene. So i applaud you. I also found it so funny twoard the end and the thing with the kiwwis was priceless. Well heres to your story. I hope its nice and long.
Wolfthesnake@aol.com
Wolfthesnake@aol.com
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November 20, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Once again, Nalani-sama, you have done it. It has been a wonderful chapter filled with more about Kella and Aja and even additional characters. I loved the part involving Mercedes conversation while the Yautja were visiting Kella. It must be quite a feat for Kella to contain her excitement (or anxiety?) at having so many Yautja visit her. I find that a most interesting part in each of the chapters where Elder Rhd (and others) visit her. Also, I really love what you are doing with Kella and Aja's relationship...even if it's making the rest of us wait right along with them. I enjoyed it greatly, and look forward to more. Thank you for sharing your story. ^_^
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November 20, 2006 at 12:00 AM
What can I say? I was greatly anticipating this chapter, and you delivered in spades. Simply amazing.
First off, props again to your ability to allow the reader to visualize the world you've created. All the subtle details and pieces placed into the story do wonders to make the world come alive (even the most seemingly trifle thing like the "birth control" ointment Kella uses adds a lot to the story - showing the reader just how she's been able to not have kids considering her *cough* promiscuity *cough* ;). And of course, your writing style just oozes personality, and each character definitely has their own. I'm quite impressed with Kella, having read over the previous chapters again as well as this current one to see how important she is to all those around her. She really does have a heavy burden placed on her.
Hah, makes sense that Adam turned out to be a politician, though I still have a hard time imagining them in loin cloths. I don't think they fit Ooman's well (except the females of course :)), that’s just me though. Though I suppose the female readership here probably wouldn't mind some Ooman males in loin cloths :)
First off, props again to your ability to allow the reader to visualize the world you've created. All the subtle details and pieces placed into the story do wonders to make the world come alive (even the most seemingly trifle thing like the "birth control" ointment Kella uses adds a lot to the story - showing the reader just how she's been able to not have kids considering her *cough* promiscuity *cough* ;). And of course, your writing style just oozes personality, and each character definitely has their own. I'm quite impressed with Kella, having read over the previous chapters again as well as this current one to see how important she is to all those around her. She really does have a heavy burden placed on her.
Hah, makes sense that Adam turned out to be a politician, though I still have a hard time imagining them in loin cloths. I don't think they fit Ooman's well (except the females of course :)), that’s just me though. Though I suppose the female readership here probably wouldn't mind some Ooman males in loin cloths :)
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November 19, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Happy, happy. Joy, joy! I love your updates. It's like reading a novel. You should get them published! I would buy the book(s). Can't wait till next time. =D
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November 19, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I loved it. Now you'll have to have a scene for me where Mercedes does bath him. Just kidding. HHHMMMMMM could be interesting though.
I think old Elder Rhd might have a thang for Kella too, or am I wrong. I shall just have to wait and see.
I think old Elder Rhd might have a thang for Kella too, or am I wrong. I shall just have to wait and see.
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November 14, 2006 at 12:00 AM
love chapter 5 thouge it did kinda seem nwierds that adam fguckewd kell aqnd npot aja...sihgs.well anyway it was still great and u are doing a superb job...but...and this is just and idea...why dont u keep adam and kell together througe half of chap 6 then use aja to get jeaulose and scare adam away in front of kell...well you probaly already have something else down yor so smart oh well thanks 4 the spechail thanks see u on predaphiles.net.;.bye
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November 7, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Great chapter and yeah you are kind of evil, but I like you.
Hopefully one day it will be Aja she will be with, but if not it is your story and I will still read it anyway.
I like the interaction Kella has with the kids in the preschool. Not to mention the teasing in the nightclub and the silly new bouncer, I bet he wont do that again in a hurry.
Anyway keep going Nalani, we all need to see Kella and Aja's relationship blossom into whatever you have planned.
Hopefully one day it will be Aja she will be with, but if not it is your story and I will still read it anyway.
I like the interaction Kella has with the kids in the preschool. Not to mention the teasing in the nightclub and the silly new bouncer, I bet he wont do that again in a hurry.
Anyway keep going Nalani, we all need to see Kella and Aja's relationship blossom into whatever you have planned.
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November 7, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Oh, my...now THAT was a chapter! Though I must admit I was disappointed that it wasn't Aja, but then where would the suspense and angst be? ;P It's going great, Nalani, please keep it up.
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November 7, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I have to say, the most important earmark of a great writer is one who can provide an attachment or affinity to fictional characters by the reader.
In this story (and Ripple of Stone), you have brilliantly succeeded.
The exceptional writing in this latest chapter has only increased the greatness of this story and indeed, the connection with the characters, which were already strong to begin with. Each character has a distinct personality, even Adam, who's been on the scene only a short time doesn't feel like someone who's been thrown into the mix out of the blue - even if secretly, I'm hoping Aja gets rid of him :) - along with Mercedes, they both feel like the belong in the world you've created, along with the rest of the characters of course. I'm now eagerly awaiting the next chapter, to see the repercussions of the latest turn of events. And though I'd love to see it sooner rather than later, I hope you take your time, and give it the proper treatment it deserves.
And once again, this and Ripple of Stone are wonderful stories that in my eyes, are publishing-worthy material. Most Impressive. (I'm running out of nice words, so I'll stop for now) :)
In this story (and Ripple of Stone), you have brilliantly succeeded.
The exceptional writing in this latest chapter has only increased the greatness of this story and indeed, the connection with the characters, which were already strong to begin with. Each character has a distinct personality, even Adam, who's been on the scene only a short time doesn't feel like someone who's been thrown into the mix out of the blue - even if secretly, I'm hoping Aja gets rid of him :) - along with Mercedes, they both feel like the belong in the world you've created, along with the rest of the characters of course. I'm now eagerly awaiting the next chapter, to see the repercussions of the latest turn of events. And though I'd love to see it sooner rather than later, I hope you take your time, and give it the proper treatment it deserves.
And once again, this and Ripple of Stone are wonderful stories that in my eyes, are publishing-worthy material. Most Impressive. (I'm running out of nice words, so I'll stop for now) :)
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November 7, 2006 at 12:00 AM
LOVED IT!!! Really, that's all I can say. Although, it is kinda sad. But, I'm sure they will be together eventually. Can't wait for more! :)