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September 29, 2023 at 12:00 AM
I just found Adult Fan Fiction and thus just found your story. I hope you have plans to continue this fic it's coming along nicely. I like it when the boys get all protective of their girl! Sincerely thanks for writing. Shellbean:)
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July 22, 2015 at 12:00 AM
This is a great story. I know it's been awhile before you added anything new, but I hope you do.
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December 10, 2014 at 12:00 AM
This is an awesome story I would love it to continue. <3
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August 25, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Love it! Please continue :)
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December 3, 2012 at 12:00 AM
Love it! more please
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June 12, 2012 at 12:00 AM
i love this story can you write more soon.
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August 22, 2011 at 12:00 AM
Oh look. Another story with the author inserts a Mary Sue OC to ship off with all the boys and become the immediately center of attention. *roles eyes* I'm beginning to think there ARE no other stories for the Lost Boys on here--at least, that stars a female lead. And lord help us if she's an OC...
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July 16, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Love it! More more more!!!!
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June 10, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Just finished reading part five. In fact I came looking for a story after just watching the movie again ^_^ You wanted a review so I thought I'd do what I could as I was reading! So far, I like the story, the feel of it and where its going. The only thing I would work on is your transitions. Its a little choppy as she's going from the hotel and around town. Hot dog, window shopping bathroom... things could flow a little more. Like maybe she dropped her hot dog and as she went to throw it away the sign with all the missing people was next to the trash can? (Sorry! I always feel wierd giving critisizm because I don't want people to think I'm' being rude!)
I'm hooked on the story so far and I am dying to see what happens with David. The last few lines we enticing and perfect in my opinion. Begs the reader to come back for more! " Well, it looked like she'd just jumped out of the pot and into the fire. Now she just had to find out how badley she'd get burned."
"...the slightly cruel smile." Oooh, I've already got the tingles and I'm squirming to see where this goes. Perfect intro for his character. It's like, yes, he's charming you with those looks, but something about his smile tears you in two. You want the delicious promise there but it also spikes your instincts that something is amiss.
Oops, that was kind of long... I hope that helps?? Feel free to email me if you'd like! <33
I'm hooked on the story so far and I am dying to see what happens with David. The last few lines we enticing and perfect in my opinion. Begs the reader to come back for more! " Well, it looked like she'd just jumped out of the pot and into the fire. Now she just had to find out how badley she'd get burned."
"...the slightly cruel smile." Oooh, I've already got the tingles and I'm squirming to see where this goes. Perfect intro for his character. It's like, yes, he's charming you with those looks, but something about his smile tears you in two. You want the delicious promise there but it also spikes your instincts that something is amiss.
Oops, that was kind of long... I hope that helps?? Feel free to email me if you'd like! <33
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January 12, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Great story so far, can't wait for the next chapter :D