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April 8, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Very nice. Good flow. I like that you are inserting back story a bit at a time. Good visual imagery as well.
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April 4, 2010 at 12:00 AM
good job and its pauk not phauk. i cant wait for the next chapter, update soon.
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April 4, 2010 at 12:00 AM
i forgot to add this was a great start keep it up
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April 2, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Awesome story so far, loved the second chapter. Does the anal tag mean yautja-human?
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April 2, 2010 at 12:00 AM
WOW you have a great start! I llove how you are portraying your characters
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April 1, 2010 at 12:00 AM
I think you have a good start here. Would like to read more soon. Great job and good luck with the chapters to come.
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March 30, 2010 at 12:00 AM
A good start. I would like more back story. Hope you write more.