rate_review Reviews

Great beginning! I like this story very very much. As others have said, you've done your homework on the history, and giving her a mixed heritage is a very interesting twist. I like the way you wove that into the story, and didn't just use it as an excuse to make her more "exotic" looking. Instead, you addressed the effects her heritage would have on her social status, and I liked that detail a lot. I've written original characters, and read even more, and there's not a trace of Mary Sue here, despite what others have said.

It's a very interesting beginning, and a very logical sequel to the movie. I'm looking forward to seeing where you go with it.

And may I say that I've never wanted to be a kitten so much in my life! ;-)

Excellent second chapter. Your style of writing really is quite good, and if I may add just one teensy comment on the Mary-sue thing, I didn't see any Mary-Sue-like qualities in here, either. It's a very enjoyable story thus far and I hope you can get your chapters written faster. I like the original character very well, I think you've given her depth and will continue to do so. I also can't to to see Jack show up. He's the best. Write more!

Read the story. All the evidence you need to tell it's just another Mary-Sue is right there. Pointing out specifics would be rhetorical.

First of all, I love this story. I can tell you took some time to capture the period in which PotC is supposed to happen. You did your research, mate; what a refreshing thing to see. :-) To create a character caught between two worlds, and then to "flesh" her out, so to speak, is always an awesome challenge. Again, I love where you're going with this; keep it up.

Second of all, the Mary-Sue stuff: huh? What? Examples of it in sto story--where? Mary Sue is either a "I can do everything superbly because I'm perfect", or "God help me I can't even breathe on my own" type of character. Sabine is neither of these; who sa fea female character can't have talent, or some level of education? Aren't there talented women--EXTREMELY talented women--that exist in this world? Heck, we probably know quite a few; for those of us who don't, expand your circle of friends. You'll be amazed at what you need to learn. Who says a female character--a YOUNG female character, at that--can't be insecure at times? Any woman who says she has it all together 24/7 is either a pathological liar, or is hitting the crack pipe WAY too hard. Until a firm understanding of "Mary Sue" can be achieved, I recommend laying off using the term, k?

Having said all that, Muse: YOU GO GURL!!! :-)

Oh my God! Can I just say that I think that you are an extremely talentrd writer, because you are. You have an terrific plot and you make the characters s so so real. This is the best fiction I've read in a long while. You have a talent in writng stories, I can tell NO BAD REVIEWS COMING YOUR WAY. Or at least I hope none will. When will she ever get around to finding out what happened to her father? And how will Will feel about seeing Elizabeth again? And will Sabine finally tell Will how she really feels about him, And will Will finally tell Sabine how he really feels about her? And the fact that I know her heritage backgroune I can actually picture how she looks, My half sister is African and Spaniard. And she is gorgeous. I can't wait to find out what will happen in the next chapter. Please don't wait long to update. I absolutely love this story.

Shameless Mary-Sue, much?

Okay, let me start by saying, Janice... shameless lame attempt to bash much? Don't hate because this story has what yours lack, or, if you don't write, don't hate because someone else has the guts to expressing themselves. I don't have a problem with constructive criticism, (and I hope Muse doesn't either), but there's nothing constructive about your witchy statement. How is Saba maa marysue? At least have the balls to back up your allegations, and give examples so the author has a chance to either: A) justify it. B) correct it. or C) acknowledge it and continue on the same course. I've read some mary sue stories not all of them are bad, some are down right entertaining. How can you tell she's a marysue in 2 chapters?

Now, as forpterpter 2... Veice!ice! I enjoyed seeing more of Sabine's and Will's personalities, and a chance to see the way they interact with each other, although I do agree... bring on Jack! I do so love that pirate. I can't wait to see the direction you take this story and these characters. Question: Are you the same Muse that has Knight takes King on scribeoz? If so, damn girl, where the hell did you learn to write!?

Sorry all for the venting, and Jancie I'm not picking on you, it just irks me when people throw something out like that and don't back it up.

A great set-up for the story so far! I agree with moonshine's assessment that it's much more believable for Elizabeth to end up with Norrington than with Will the Blacksmith! Will and Sabine seem to have a better future as roughly social equals. Elizabeth comes across as very noble and dutiful, yet saddened to loose Will. I hope Will gets a chance to play hero for Sabine, and when is Jack going to show up? I love Jack!

I love the story line you have going. Can't wait to read some more chapters! Keep up the good work.

I can't wait for the story to really start. the story is really interesting and I like the title of the movie. What will happen to Sabine's father? Will Sabine get home in time to see her father in his condition? And when will Will make an appearance in the story? Only the next chapter can tell where the story goes. Please dont wait long to update the story, Im anxious to find thi this story is going to turn out. I'm loving it so far, nice job keep up the good work and I'll keep it coming with the reviews.