Of Swords and Lightsabers

Title: Of Swords and Lightsabers

Author: Theaphelia

Archived: Just here. Feel free to post it
elsewhere with credit to me. I want people to KNOW who destroyed
their faith in humanity. :D

Summary: Grievous, tired of being bossed
around by Dooku, decides to return home to Kalee. But what
happens when Dooku follows him, and the villagers offer Dooku to
a Mumuu as a sacrifice? Obviously major AU. Sparked by a very
sick IM conversation between me and a friend of mine.

Rating: NC-17.

Pairings: Grievous/Dooku,
Grievous/Obi-Wan, Grievous/Dooku/Obi-Wan/Padme/Anakin/Mumuu/OC.

Feedback: Leave it here, or send an email
to Theaphelia@yahoo.com.
Feel free to flame my perverted head off.

Characters: Grievous, Obi-Wan, Count
Dooku, Anakin, Padme, a muumuu, and Zeashi (OC).

Betas: None, really. Just sent to a few
people to break their brains. Thanks to one of them for inspiring
the title XD

Author Notes: This is not meant to be
taken seriously. If you do take it seriously, and find it sexy
and whack off to it, uh…okay. XD

Disclaimer: Grievous, Dooku, and other
characters you recognize belong to Lucas. I no makey teh monies
off it. Also, I am not responsible for broken brains.

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General Grievous stared angrily out into the
stars, hands held behind his back. He heard someone walk into the
room, and slowly turned around to face them. It was Count Dooku.

“General Grievous, we need to
talk,” said the Count, striding across the room regally to
stop right in front of the cyborg.

“About what, my Lord?” the General
hissed. “I have made my decision. I wish to be returned to
Kalee. I wish to rejoin my people. I am tired of fighting in this
war, and I am tired of following your orders.”

Count Dooku could not believe his ears. This
could not be happening—the Geonosian mind subjugation was
supposed to erase all memories of his homeworld and all emotions
but anger. How was it that Grievous could remember his former
life, and feel homesickness? It was supposed to be impossible!

“You will never be accepted there,
General,” Dooku cried. “Look at what you have become.
You’ve become a machine, an abomination in the eyes of your
people. You—“

“How do you know what I have become in
my people’s eyes, Dooku?” General Grievous spat,
narrowing his eyes at the Sith. “You are not Kaleesh, and
you have deceived me numerous times. You have taken advantage of
me, my Lord. I am tired of this game-playing. I will return
home.”

“They will never accept you. You are a
droid.”

Faster than a normal eye could see, the
General’s lightsabers were out and he had lunged at Dooku
angrily. Just as quickly, Dooku’s mind whipped out like a
tentacle and grabbed hold of the General and his lightsabers.
Flinging one of the lightsabers aside, he snatched the other out
of Grievous’ hand and turned the cyborg around, forcing him
to lean over a control panel and pointing the lightsaber at
Grievous’ groin.

“You do not attack your master,
General.”

“You are a disgusting, foul old
human!” Grievous roared, humiliated and helpless under
Dooku’s force-hold.

Dooku pushed the lightsaber forward, into
Grievous’ crotch. Grievous roared in pain as the heat of the
saber melted a hole in the duranium. “You will learn not to
disobey me, General.” He pushed in a few more inches, then
pulled the saber out and shut it off. Grievous grunted and
growled as relief washed over him. The heat had been removed, and
soothing, cold air wafted into the hole and cooled off the metal.

Dooku blew into the newly-created hole,
causing Grievous to gasp in pleasure. There was no longer any
pain; the metal had cooled somewhat. Dooku stuck his finger into
the hole and rubbed along the sides. Grievous growled in a primal
response to the new, pleasurable sensations and bent further
over, presenting himself to the horny Sith.

Dooku could feel himself losing control. Calm
yourself, he spoke to his throbbing member. The time will
come. A Sith is always calm and in control. Dooku leaned over
and ran his tongue along the outside edge of Grievous’ hole.
He released his mental hold over Grievous, and the General jumped
up and spun around, facing Dooku. He grabbed the Sith in his arms
and nuzzled his face gently, purring loudly. He shut his eyes and
spread his legs, grinding his pelvic plates against Dooku’s
now-bulging crotch.

Dooku felt himself lose his cool, and his
member became fully erect. No longer could he stand to wait. He
untied his fine armorweave pants. Grievous looked down at the
hard cock and let out a series of loud purrs which slowly turned
into erotic growls.

Grievous spun around again and got onto his
hands and knees, thrusting his crotch into the air and shaking
his ass suggestively. He looked over his shoulder to find Dooku
lean over him. He felt Dooku’s penis press against the
newly-created entranceway. Grievous leaned back, impaling himself
on Dooku’s member and letting out a roar of pleasure. He had
never been on the receiving end of penetration before, but he
found it just as desirable as the giving end. Shutting his eyes
in ecstasy, he sighed softly and felt Dooku begin to thrust.

Dooku’s thrusts were slow at first, as
he got used to the feel of Grievous’ metal pussy. It had
been ages since he’d been with anyone other than his master,
Sidious. For a long time, he had desired the Kaleesh cyborg, but
had denied it. It was wrong to feel love for what was,
essentially, a droid.

Despite his concerns, he continued to thrust
into the seductively growling Grievous, who was pressing himself
against Dooku. Dooku gently petted Grievous’ head, and
Grievous leaned his head back and purred softly, his audio flaps
flat against his head. He remembered how he would do the same
thing to his wives, while they were bond-mating.

Grievous felt himself being flooded with
pleasure, and began vigorously rubbing his crotch plates with his
hand, taking all of Dooku’s length inside of his body and
thrusting against Dooku while letting out low growls of quickly
building ecstasy.

Dooku started pounding harder into Grievous,
his cock rubbing against the metal walls of Grievous’
opening. He felt his legs tense up, and he cried out as he came
into the General, his come spilling out onto the cold metal
floor. Satisfied, he pulled out of Grievous and began to clean
himself off.

Grievous roared angrily and stood up,
glaring at the Count as he redid his pants and eyed the General
nonchalantly. “I am your master, Grievous. You will not
forget that.”

“My Lord—“ Grievous said
pathetically. He had been so close, after so long, he had nearly
had an orgasm.

“I do not bring myself as low as to
please an insubordinate underling,” Dooku said quietly,
exiting the room and leaving the ravaged and unsatisfied Grievous
to sulk.

This is why I wish to return home, you
old fungus, Grievous thought angrily. My wives never deny
me pleasure.

He felt around in his cape and found a
lightsaber—it was one of his first, and it had many ridges
and perfect for what Grievous needed now.

Taking care to point the igniting edge away
from himself, he positioned the lightsaber at his opening, which
was still dripping Dooku’s semen, and pushed it in. It
rubbed along the sides of his metal pussy and sent waves of bliss
up and down his metal body.

He shut his eyes and slowly thrust the
lightsaber in and out of himself. He could almost feel himself as
an organic, he could feel his member slowly coming out of its
sheath as his first wife, Zeashi, touched him and rubbed him
sensually.

He took his other hand and rubbed his chest
plate, imitating what he could remember of his wife’s gentle
motions. He lightly ran his metal fingers over the durasteel
armor, then under the armor and over his gutsack, all the while
thrusting the hard lightsaber into his body.

Once again, the longed-for pleasure of
orgasm was drawing nearer, and he felt all of his metal tendons
begin to tense up and flood with energy as he thrust against the
lightsaber and let out loud, primal growls.

Pushing the lightsaber into himself harder
and harder, he separated his free arm and with one hand rubbed
his gutsack. With the other, he massaged his pelvic plates and
arched his back, and suddenly he felt wave after wave of orgasmic
bliss shoot through his body. He roared in ecstasy, shoving the
lightsaber into his opening roughly and leaning against the
control panel, gasping. For so long, he had gone without the
bliss of orgasm, and finally, he had achieved it.

Slouching contentedly against the control
panel, he thought about what he would do when he got home. He
would see his wives. He would get to see Zeashi again, and
pleasure her, and the others, as he had once before, even if he
had to use erotic toys to do so.

This hopeful thought in his mind, he stood
up and stalked out of the room to find a small, spare ship, and
set the destination coordinates to those of Kalee. No more would
he bow his head to the old human. He was going home.

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There will be another chapter of
this…thing…eventually. Love it? Hate it (probably XD)?
Leave a review.