Rum And White
folder
Pirates of the Caribbean (All) › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
22
Views:
2,701
Reviews:
4
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Pirates of the Caribbean (All) › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
22
Views:
2,701
Reviews:
4
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own the Pirates of the Caribbean movie series, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
The Wedding Part 2B
Title: The Wedding Part 2? B? Part 2B?
Author: Nita Riddle
Feedback: Please! Send it to BenilleAlmare@y...
Summery: Next segment in our lil series... what happens when an
alternative lifestyle living pirate, meets a priest. Oh and there's
a duck too..... and why si this sounding more and more like a bad
joke...especially since I'm having a Bar involved.
A/N: Jack, Elizabeth, a priest, and a duck all walk into a bar.
Except for the duck. It's wadding.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The sun was up and only three hours until the wedding. The guests
had arrived, the ship had been commandeered, and the inlaws were all
below deck despretly searching for a drop of rum to drink. The sea
gulls were screaming their disturbing sound, Anamaria was bullying
the crew in a dress, so all was right in the world.
Except for the dress. That was just unnerving.
It was purple.
Captain Jack Sparrow soon to be Mrs. William Turner stood wng ng
naught but a heathen silk robe on the deck of the ship he had
commandeered. The wedding barges small crew was quite willing to
help out with the wedding once they learned the othetiontion was to
become a eunuch.
Now the crew of the Pearl Pearl knew Jack was truly jesting but the
crew of the grey lark did not wish to take the chance.
The wedding barge came with it's own priest and the problem in that
was, Jack had not met the priest.
The othe problem was that Jack refused to close the robe he was
wearing. He kept swearing it was so the pearl would be able to
recognize him even without the rum.
Or rather, that was what he told people. His true reason was that
he enjoyed the feel or the salty wind, the taste of the ocean
washing him.
Ofcourse if he ever tried to explain any of it to any one, Jack
might get a little too distracted with the telling of the story to
keep it from sounding like a ridiculous lewd novel written by a
frenchman.
Which brings us to the reason he's standing on board said ship. He
has to inspect the priest.
"GOOD LORD JACK! PUT SOMETHING ON!!! Honestly, you'd think you
think you are god's gift to the world," muttered Elizabeth as she
averted she eyes from the leering bride.
"I'm not?! Oh dear. My fans shall be terribly disappointed," he
said off hand as he tied his robe shut.
Elizabeth peeked to make sure he was properly clothes and turned to
glare at him, "Jack, there's only a few hours until the wedding, do
try to restrain your self until then. Now hurry up, the priest has
been waiting for us in the bar."
"There's a bar?" he smiled grandly and cockily. Finally, something
was going right. Or perhaps left.
Elizabeth didn't even bother to turn around to answer his
question, "Not a drop Jack Sparrow."
Jack glared unapprovingly at her back as he followed her
muttering, "It's Captain Jack Sparrow. Soon to be Captain Jack
Turner and for the love of any god you worship, if you want me to
restrain myself give me rum."
An elderly frail priest was standing outside the doorway holding a
bible. How is a small fat book going to protect him? A duck was
standign beside the priest.
Hold on a minute.
Priest.
Duck.
Elizabeth
Priest.
Duck.
Elizabeth
A priest, a duck, and a lady.
Priest, Duck, Lady, and Pirate Captain Who Enjoys An Alternative
Lifestyle.
There's something off about this picture.
Jack raised a questioning eye brow at the aquatic bird. "Anything
you'd like to tell me, Mrs Commodor?"
Elizabeth smiled grandly, "Father, this is the bride, Jack. Jack,
Father."
His eyes went wide open, "The duck is your father? I believe I have
severly underestimated the old govenor of Port Royal."
Elizabeth blinked and took a moment to let it sink in.
"No, you call a priest Father. The duck was Cotton's wedding
present, didn't you know?"
"I wish I did. I would have asked to have it for dinner." jack
said ernestly, "Shall we get this on?"
"My darling....woman. You are not what i expected. Come, let us
enter this place of drink and discuss your wedding."
They passed through the door way, Elizabeth first of course. A lady
is always first. Unless she isn't a woman but a man in desguise or
an ugly woman. Then he or she is to pass after the lady.
Darlene Sparrow had taught her son all the proper ettiquette a
Tortugan brothel owner could teach. And then she hired one of her
clients to teach Jack the rest.
It took Jack but a moment to realize the priests words. "What are
you talking about Daddy dearest," He told the priest. "I'm not a
woman, want to see?"
Jack opened his robe and stood proud, displaying clearly that he was
most certainly not a woman.
The priest of course, promtly fainted, his face laiding directly
between Elizabeth's breasts, causing her to scream.
"JACK SPARROW! Put that thing away at once! And get this old thing
off me."
Jack didn't suppose it was the best moment to ask for a drink, so
instead, he left to room and told Gibbs to take over for him.
Jack Sparrow still had a wedding dress to try on, and a husband to
grope and steal liquor from.
Author: Nita Riddle
Feedback: Please! Send it to BenilleAlmare@y...
Summery: Next segment in our lil series... what happens when an
alternative lifestyle living pirate, meets a priest. Oh and there's
a duck too..... and why si this sounding more and more like a bad
joke...especially since I'm having a Bar involved.
A/N: Jack, Elizabeth, a priest, and a duck all walk into a bar.
Except for the duck. It's wadding.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The sun was up and only three hours until the wedding. The guests
had arrived, the ship had been commandeered, and the inlaws were all
below deck despretly searching for a drop of rum to drink. The sea
gulls were screaming their disturbing sound, Anamaria was bullying
the crew in a dress, so all was right in the world.
Except for the dress. That was just unnerving.
It was purple.
Captain Jack Sparrow soon to be Mrs. William Turner stood wng ng
naught but a heathen silk robe on the deck of the ship he had
commandeered. The wedding barges small crew was quite willing to
help out with the wedding once they learned the othetiontion was to
become a eunuch.
Now the crew of the Pearl Pearl knew Jack was truly jesting but the
crew of the grey lark did not wish to take the chance.
The wedding barge came with it's own priest and the problem in that
was, Jack had not met the priest.
The othe problem was that Jack refused to close the robe he was
wearing. He kept swearing it was so the pearl would be able to
recognize him even without the rum.
Or rather, that was what he told people. His true reason was that
he enjoyed the feel or the salty wind, the taste of the ocean
washing him.
Ofcourse if he ever tried to explain any of it to any one, Jack
might get a little too distracted with the telling of the story to
keep it from sounding like a ridiculous lewd novel written by a
frenchman.
Which brings us to the reason he's standing on board said ship. He
has to inspect the priest.
"GOOD LORD JACK! PUT SOMETHING ON!!! Honestly, you'd think you
think you are god's gift to the world," muttered Elizabeth as she
averted she eyes from the leering bride.
"I'm not?! Oh dear. My fans shall be terribly disappointed," he
said off hand as he tied his robe shut.
Elizabeth peeked to make sure he was properly clothes and turned to
glare at him, "Jack, there's only a few hours until the wedding, do
try to restrain your self until then. Now hurry up, the priest has
been waiting for us in the bar."
"There's a bar?" he smiled grandly and cockily. Finally, something
was going right. Or perhaps left.
Elizabeth didn't even bother to turn around to answer his
question, "Not a drop Jack Sparrow."
Jack glared unapprovingly at her back as he followed her
muttering, "It's Captain Jack Sparrow. Soon to be Captain Jack
Turner and for the love of any god you worship, if you want me to
restrain myself give me rum."
An elderly frail priest was standing outside the doorway holding a
bible. How is a small fat book going to protect him? A duck was
standign beside the priest.
Hold on a minute.
Priest.
Duck.
Elizabeth
Priest.
Duck.
Elizabeth
A priest, a duck, and a lady.
Priest, Duck, Lady, and Pirate Captain Who Enjoys An Alternative
Lifestyle.
There's something off about this picture.
Jack raised a questioning eye brow at the aquatic bird. "Anything
you'd like to tell me, Mrs Commodor?"
Elizabeth smiled grandly, "Father, this is the bride, Jack. Jack,
Father."
His eyes went wide open, "The duck is your father? I believe I have
severly underestimated the old govenor of Port Royal."
Elizabeth blinked and took a moment to let it sink in.
"No, you call a priest Father. The duck was Cotton's wedding
present, didn't you know?"
"I wish I did. I would have asked to have it for dinner." jack
said ernestly, "Shall we get this on?"
"My darling....woman. You are not what i expected. Come, let us
enter this place of drink and discuss your wedding."
They passed through the door way, Elizabeth first of course. A lady
is always first. Unless she isn't a woman but a man in desguise or
an ugly woman. Then he or she is to pass after the lady.
Darlene Sparrow had taught her son all the proper ettiquette a
Tortugan brothel owner could teach. And then she hired one of her
clients to teach Jack the rest.
It took Jack but a moment to realize the priests words. "What are
you talking about Daddy dearest," He told the priest. "I'm not a
woman, want to see?"
Jack opened his robe and stood proud, displaying clearly that he was
most certainly not a woman.
The priest of course, promtly fainted, his face laiding directly
between Elizabeth's breasts, causing her to scream.
"JACK SPARROW! Put that thing away at once! And get this old thing
off me."
Jack didn't suppose it was the best moment to ask for a drink, so
instead, he left to room and told Gibbs to take over for him.
Jack Sparrow still had a wedding dress to try on, and a husband to
grope and steal liquor from.