The crossover that someone actually asked for

I open my eyes. I’m lying on top of Jack, who is looking up at me and smirking. I yelp and jump up. I look around at our changed surroundings. It is light, and clean, and there are so many things that I have never seen before. Jack slowly gets up, holding his head, and looks around as well. He checks his clothes, and pulls out the vial and the pictures.
“Well that’s interesting” is all he says.
“Where are we?” I ask. How on earth did we get to someplace so strange from that store? Even the air smells different.
“Let’s have a look-see.” A man jumps out from behind a bench brandishing a pot as Jack walks towards it. Jack raises an eyebrow and smirks at the obviously frightened man. “Easy there, mate. Do you point cooking pots at everyone you meet?”
“Get out of my apartment!” he shrieks.
“Don’t worry,” I say. “We’re not going to hurt you. You live here?”
“Of course I live here! Who are you?” Jack interrupts me, and grandiosely introduces himself as ‘Captain Jack Sparrow,’ then adds that I am his whelp. I ignore this, and try to calm the man down so we can figure out where we are. Jack suddenly slaps his head and pulls the portraits back out. He looks at them, and looks excitedly up at me.
“This is one of them! Now we just have to find the other one.” He turns back to the man, and shows him the other picture. “Do you know who this is?”
“Jack? What do you want with him?”
“It’s *Captain* Jack. Little respect, all I…” Before he can launch into any more misguided drunken speeches, I interrupt.
“You mean the man in the portrait is also called Jack? Where is he?”
“I’m guessing eavesdropping in the hall. This is this some weird kinky game he thought up, isn’t it? So who are you meant to be? And why on earth did he get you to dress so dirty?”
The last was directed at Jack, obviously. At least he doesn’t smell yet, other than the salt and rum that I suspect is a permanent fixture with Jack. I had no idea what the first bit meant, but at least he’d stopped looking quite so scared, and the pot was by his side.
“Oi, watch it mate. You’ll never see finer pirate garb. And you’ll never see a finer pirate! I’m Captain Jack Sparrow!”
I sigh. “Yes Jack, you’ve said that already. Do you think you could just *try* to focus on figuring out where we are and how we get back, so that we might, I don’t know, FIND ELIZABETH!!!” They both looked startled at me shouting.
“Keep your breeches on, luv. We’ll get her back once we’re all done here.” He turns back to the man, and brandishes his sword and the portrait. “Take us to this Jack now, and no-one gets hurt.” Personally, I think he’s a little too drunk to be intimidating, but since the man flinches, I guess it makes little difference.
“I’ll just check if Grace has seen him, he might have visited the office.” He goes behind the bench again, not taking his eyes off us. He picks up a small white object, pushed a few buttons on it, and held it to the side of his face. “Grace? It’s me. Has Jack been there today?” He paused, listening to something. “Of course they are. Will Karen be done with him anytime soon? I think it’s fairly important.” He paused again. Jack was looking baffled, which is always a nice change from cocky, but I probably look the same. “Fine, hang on a tic.” He looks at us again. “I know where Jack is, but he can’t come here right now.”
Jack brandishes his sword again. “Take us to him now.
“Grace? There are some people in costumes here wre qre quite adamant they want to see Jack. I think this is some set-up that Jack is in on, but we’ll be there soon.” He puts the white thing down, grabs a coat and opens the door, looking at us expectantly. Jack & I move out into a long corridor, looking around as he bustles past us and pushes a panel on the wall.
“Jack is at Grace’s office. Do you know Grace?”
I answer him, since Jack is fumbling through his clothes distractedly again. I think he’s forgotten he’s out of rum. “I don’t think I know anyone here. I don’t know who you are.”
He hesitates, then says, “My name is Will Truman.”
I start, then introduce myself. “Will Turner, at your service. Could you help us figure out where we are? I don’t know how we got here. Last I remember we were in a shop, and it was nighttime. Are we at least still in Tortuga?” Maybe we could still make it to the docks in time to leave with the tide.
He looks at me oddly. “Is Tortuga in Spain? This is Manhattan.” At seeing my blank look, he tried again. “New York? Only about the biggest city in America?”
Jack looked up at that. “We’re in the Americas?”
“As far as games go, this isn’t making sense, even for Jack. You don’t know what city you’re in, & you’ve never even heard of Manhattan? At least he knows his name,” gesturing at Jack with a fair amount of mockery in his voice. “I suppose you wouldn’t know who the president is then?” Noting our blank looks, he went on. “What about year? Please don’t try telling me you think it’s the seventeenth century or something.”
“Of course!” Jack obviously thought he’d figured something out. “We’re trying to find out what your future is, so he sent us into the future!” Before either of could comment, the wall opened with a sudden noise.
Will stepped in, then noticed our confusion. “Ah, I see you’re pretending to not understand our new-fangled technology. This is an el-e-vay-tor. If you step inside, it will takes us to the bottom floor, where we can start walking to get to Jack. Alright?” He was mocking us again, but I’m not particularly surprised he didn’t believe Jack. I wasn’t exactly convinced myself. We step inside; he pushed another panel on the wall and the doors closed. There was the strangest sensation of moving without moving, like being on a boat. The doors open again to a different room. We stepped out, and followed Will out of the building. Jack and I froze at the sudden noise and movement of hundreds of coloured objects rapidly moving in front of us. Will noticed, and as if indulging us, explained. “They are called cars. They move very fast, taking people where they want to go. Like carriages, but without horses. Don’t stand in front of them, and just follow me. I need to get back to work, and I really don’t have time to act as tour guide to some costumed friends of Jack’s.”
Jack and I followed him, gazing in wonder at this strange world. This was definitely not Tortuga, and Jack’s into the future theory suddenly seemed almost sensible. More likely, however, was that he’d passed out from rum, I’d been hit on the head with some large heavy object, and this then would be a dream. It had to be a dream, because Jack had been quiet since his sudden outburst, and he hadn’t even mentioned rum since we woke up. Manhattan was even more of a shock to the system than Tortuga was, although at least it isn’t anywhere near as filthy here, and I haven’t seen any drunkards (other than Jack, of course) or whores here yet. While we were obviously out of place, as the other people on the streets were in very different clothing, they all appeared to ignore us. I think Jack is a bit astonished that no-one appears to be noticing him. I imagine it would just about be a first for him, as he does tend to stand out. Even if you ignore the clothes and the drunken swagger, there is something about him that is oddly captivating. No, that can’t be the word I was looking for. Elizabeth is captivating, Jack is an unexpected storm that you have to keep watch on to make sure it doesn’t destroy everything around you. I was still musing on Jack, and why it was impossible to look away from him, when Will directed us into another building, and into another elevator. This time the odd motion was definitely upwards. The doors opened with a sound and we followed Will out into another room. The other Jack was perched on one of the two tables, and there was a woman sitting behind each of them. Jack and the brunette woman kept giggling to each other without appearing to notice us, and the woman with the curly red hair moved towards us.
“Hi Will. What’s with the costumes again?”
“I found them in the apartment. They’re looking for Jack.” Will shrugged. “I don’t know, ask him.”
Jack turned around at the sound of his name, and looked at us. “Moi? And who are you?”
My Jack (not mine, I didn’t mean mine, I just meant the one I know) took off his hat with a flourish, made a grandiose half-bow, and said, “Captain Jack Sparrow. This ‘ere is my whelp, dear William.”
I frowned at him and introduced myself to Jack and the ladies. “Will Turner, at your service.”
Will piped up from the redhead’s side, “You know of Jack, and this is Grace Adler and that is Karen Walker. Will and Captain Jack here claim to have no idea as to where they are, or what year it is. They have hand-drawn pictures of me and Jack, and *had* to find us straight away. Do you know anything about this, Jack?”
“I’d remember anything involving anyone as cute as him.” Is he talking about me? “Why do you always assume that costumed freaks turning up in your apartment have something to do with me?”
Will raised an eyebrow at that. “Do you want me to answer that?”
Mrs Walker interrupted what I could sense could soon become a heated argument by getting up and walking over to my Jack and gesturing at his clothes “Honey, what is this? What’s going on here?”
Jack looked down at himself, and back up at Mrs Walker. “If people are going to be mocking the clothes of the finest pirate there is, I’m going to be needing more rum to avoid a fight, savvy?” I knew it was too much to hope for that Jack had forgotten about his beloved rum for too long.
“Anything liquid on that half of the room is alcoholic. I’m sure Karen wouldn’t mind sharing.” Miss Adler spoke with a bit more venom than is quite proper of ladies of standing, and her clothes did not indicate her as such, but I didn’t know where else to place her. Jack clasped his hands together, as if in prayer, and inclined his head to Miss Adler in thanks. He then wandered to the wall, found a flask of some kind and struggled to open it for a few moments before Mrs Walker took pity on him and poured him a glass, and refilled the one on her desk. He thanked her, in his fashion, as well, and rounded on the rest of us.
“I’ve found rum. Drinks all round!” I sighed, and Miss Adler groaned. “Not another alcoholic in my office!” Jack had already finished his drink, and had figured out how to pour himself another one.

Somehow, within the hour, Jack had cajoled everyone, including me, to drink from Mrs Walker’s supply, which had to be running fairly low by now. Will and Miss Adler had been trying to get Jack to explain what exactly we had been doing in their home, and why they needed to see Jack. My Jack had been avoiding the subject completely, by insisting that it was much too important and confusing to be discussed without rum. He found a willing drinker in Mrs Walker, and they appeared to be getting on quite well. He had been constantly flouncing round the room, trying to get everyone drunk and regaling them with various far-fetched stories. While this is what I believe is fairly normal behaviour for Jack, I suspect that he is so adamant about Will and Jack drinking so that he can slip the potion the magician gave us into their drinks. I hope he is doing so, anyway. While Karen and Jack have been entranced by Captain Jack and have been giggling merrily with him, Miss Adler and Will still appear very suspicious of us. I might as well try to talk to them, see if I can convince them that Jack is more or less harmless, and that they should just do as he says. Hopefully Jack has some sort of plan that can get us back to Tortuga.
“I shouldn’t worry too much. Once there is no more drink, he will want us to be on our way.”
“No such luck, I’m afraid. Karen’s drinks drawer has an in-built monitoring system. When it gets too low, an alarm sounds and more is delivered.” I did not understand how that could be, but I believed Miss Adler.
“In which case, once he passes out I will remove him. Or once everyone else passes out, he will get bored and wander off in search of his ship. I will try to stop him doing too much damage in the meantime, and I do apologise for his behaviour.”
“I take it he does this a lot?” Will asked me.
“It would take someone much stronger than I to keep him from his rum.”
“So how long have you been together?” Miss Adler asked.
“I’m sorry Miss Adler, I don’t follow.”
“Please, call me Grace.” The unexpected similarity between her words and those of Elizabeth, only two days ago, struck me with sudden force. In Elizabeth’s case, I wanted desperately to be worthy to speak to her with familiarity, but I knew that proper behaviour would never allow it. I was a blacksmith, and she is the Governor’s daughter. I am unworthy of her attentions, and while I know that she has affection for me, we must always maintain a certain distance between us. Since then, everything has changed. She has been kidnapped by treacherous pirates, and in trying to keep her safe I have broken laws, allied myself with the ridiculous yet entrancing pirate currently trying to teach Jack and Mrs Walker some pirate song, and somehow ended up in a different world. I no longer have any idea what is proper, or what is expected of me here. Perhaps the best thing would be to try to fit in with the people here, until Jack can get us back to Tortuga. With that in mind, I try again.
“Grace, then, I am unsure how to reply to your question.”
“Well when did you meet him?”
“Two days ago. He was hiding in my Master’s forge, and I fought with him until the Commodore arrived and arrested him. I had hoped that would be the last of it, but I found myself needing his help.”
Will and Grace both look surprised at that. “Really? You appear to be have known each other much longer than that.”
“It does feel like that. He can be quite tiring.”
“Arrested, you say? What for?” Will asked.
“For being a pirate, of course. His arm is branded, which is all the proof the Commodore needs. His illegal exploits are extensive and well known, and I believe there is a price on his head in all British settlements. He also threatened the Governor’s daughter while trying to escape, which is why I fought him. She was kidnapped that night, and I broke him out so that he could show me where the pirates who kidnapped her sailed to.”
Will and Grace looked quite confused at all that. I realised Mrs Walker had come up behind me when she gestured at me and said “I’d like a few of whatever he’s having.”
Jack had his arm around her waist, and was still gesturing wildly with his other hand, which was holding his drink. “Aye, the lad does get some fanciful notions. He needs to have a drink, lighten up, and sing along with us!” He launched into another round of the song he was singing earlier, and Mrs Walker joined in.
“We’re devils and scoundrels and villain and knaves, drink up me hearties yo ho!
We’re black sheep, really bad eggs, drink up me hearties yo ho!
Yo ho, Yo ho, a pirates life for me!”
Will and Grace were looking quite bemused. The other Jack flounced over to my Jack and Mrs Walker, and angrily addressed them both.
“You shall not sing unless you are musically gifted. And Karen! How dare you get cosy with this icky grunge wannabe? You promised *I* would always be your favourite fag!” Again, I understood little, but I assume that my Jack had in some way offended this Jack and made him jealous, and that more slapping or a swordfight is forthcoming. “And you!” he said, angrily pointing at my Jack “She is mine, stop singing, get rid of the eyeliner and take a shower!”
My Jack holds his hands up, swaying dangerously. “Easy there mate. No offence intended. Just singing along with the pretty lady here while me boy is chatting to your friends there.”
Angry Jack turns on Will and Grace. “I have told you about fighting over men before! Grace, trust me, gay-dar says you don’t have a chance here. And Will, he’s much too obsessed with the *Captain* here to give you the time of day, at least until you hit the gym.” He then turned on me. “And you! Cabinboy! If you’re going to get all costumed up with your boyfriend, try to do a better job of staying in character. Don’t leave him to get drunk with Karen! You’re meant to be keeping him entertained, so he doesn’t need her!” He humphed once, turned on his heel and stormed out the door. My Jack broke the stunned silence that followed.
“Another drink then, darlin’?”