Tainted and returned to you

"Have you ever confused a dream with life? Or stolen something when you have the cash? Have you ever been blue? Or thought your train moving while sitting still? Maybe I was just crazy. Or maybe I was just a girl... interrupted."
-Girl interrupted by Suzanna Kayson
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Chapter 1

Lily looked out of her apartment window at the glistening lights of Los Angeles and sighed.

"God have I fucked up this time" She spoke allowed.

She shook her head and took a long drag on her cigarette. As she exhaled she turned her head slightly and looked back at the figure lying on the bed, tangled in the sheets. A pale moon beam shone into the room, making the figures feature just visible. She could see the bruises and cuts on his face. But behind that she could she the slight smile on his face.

‘How does he do it? The whole world could be falling apart and he’d still have that goofy grin on his face’ she thought and let out a little giggle.

Turning back around again she flicked her cigarette butt out the open window. Then suddenly tears started to slide freely down her face. She was scared. Scared about what is going to happen to Kip, to her. When Kip had came home earlier that day, black and blue, she had nearly lost it completely, then and there. He had gone to Carter's early this mornto eto explain the situation. She had wanted to go with him but he’d made he stay at home. She was just glad that his brother, Memphis had shown up and saved him from an early grave. Not that he’d have much longer to live if they didn’t fill the order.

They had been so close to filling it few days ago. 30 cars boosted and only 20 to go. But they’d got cocky and had made a mistake. The cops had come across their warehouse full off cars and had impounded them. All their months of planning and hard work down the drain. But luckily they had managed to escape capture, or not so lucky depending how you looked at it, because now they had to deal with Carter. She had never met but she knew he was a ruthless bastard. They knew right then that they were dead meat.

She let out an irritable sigh. Her head was spinning, so many thoughts rushing though her mind. She reached up and grabbed some hair at the side of headhead and pulled it tight, while scrunching her eyes shut. ‘Why won’t it just stop’ she willed. But no one answered he plea. She unclenched her fist and opened her eye. She felt dazed, like she’d just come out of a 4 hour movie that she didn't understand.

"God I need a hit" She thought allowed.

It had been 1 year since she last had shot up. She’d been doing drugs since she was 13, starting off small at first, smoking marijuana behind the bike sheds at recess with her classmates. Soon she had found that she couldn’t turn down the chance to experiment with other mind altering substances and by the time she was 14, she had covered the entire spectrum of drugs. Anything that she could smoke, swallow, snort or inject she tr Any Anything to block out the real world. Anything to block out the pain and hurt. Anything to block out the lost feeling that filed her soul.

When she had finally run from her abusive foster parents and camck tck to LA, her need for drugs had not diminished. Of course there wasn’t a lot of money for drugs when you are a jobless, homeless run away in LA. So she had taken to boosting cars for money to pay for the drugs, and also doing giving her dealer blow jobs when she didn’t have the money to pay him. She’d learnt a long time ago that in this cold, vicious world there was no time for morals. For two months she had earned her keep this way. I mean, it's easier to lose yourself in drugs than it is to cope with life. It's easier to steal what you want than it is to earn it.

Then she had meet Kip. She was trying to boost his car at the time while it was parked outside a 7/11. She had run 6 blocks blocks before he managed to catch up with her. She had expected him to be livid but instead he seemed pretty impressed. He was so goofy and eccentric and straight away had proclaimed he loved her and wanted to marry her. Of course it was only to get into her pants at the time, but it was still cute.

He wasn’t what she usually went for in a guy, but she took that as a good sign. She usually went for the big muscle clad studs with more dick then brains. But all those guys had just been oightight stand material. I mean it wasn't like Kip was the boyfriend mothers dreamed their daughters to date. He was arrogant, moody, crazy and always in trouble, but hey she was exactly the same. They were a perfect match. And not only that but he was the only on who had ever accepted her for who she was, not just for her looks. He made her feel human.

She’d had never told him about her drug taking habits. He’d found that out for himself. Till this day she had never understood why she hadn’t told him. Maybe she was afraid. Afraid that if he knew he’d reject her and she’d have to carry on with her pathetic existence as a junkie whore. She hadn’t even told him her age till her 16 birthday. When he’d meet her he had always assumed she was 17 going on 18. But he hadn’t been too mad about that in the end.

So anyway, they had hooked up not long after meeting and had become a team. Boosting cars and living in the fast lane. Then roughly 1 year ago he had found out about her habit and had been furious. He didn’t like people around him to keep secrets and had felt hurt that she hadn’t thought that he was worthy of that information. It had nearly been the end of them but she had had cleaned up he act and he had taken her back. One year down though line they were still going strong as 'boyfriend' and 'girlfriend', although they never refered to themselves as that.. She didn’t know if love was what they had, they had never said that to each other. It was more a mutual understanding. They both were screw ups antcastcasts, so they looked out for each other, found comfort in each other arms.

But her blood still craved the release drugs gave her. The only over thing that sated her appetite for that rush was either boosting cars or sex. And she had already jacked a car and fucked Kip today. Now her skin itched for something more. Times like these always made her want to go running back to drugs as her safety net. But she couldn’t and wouldn’t give in this time. She couldn’t let Kip down. Besides he was her safety net now, the one that looks after her.

‘Yea and what happens if you let Carter down. He won’t be able to protect you or himself from Carter and you know it. Will he still be your rock when he’s 6 feet under." She thought.

‘Oh great’ She sighed. She knew she must be getting back her withdrawal symptom when she started to argue with herself inside her head.

‘That’s not going to happen. Memphis will help us. He’ll get us out of this’ She answered back in her mind.

‘Yea right, whatever you say. Do you really think that the infamous Memphis Raines could dig you outta this hole you twve dve dug for yourselves. You’ve got two weeks to boost 50 cars and you don’t even know where to look for them. Face it chica, you and your boy may as well just go dig your graves. But why not go out with a bang. Get high; it will make the hide to hell a whole lot better’

‘Shut up!’ she yelled inwardly.

‘Ohhh, great comk swk sweetie. You really are a pathetick, yk, you know that? Standing at your window, in nothing but your panties on, arguing with yourself. No wonder your family didn’t want you. They couldn’t stand you. I mean your mom died giving birth to you and i bet dad was glad he died, just to be rid of you. And you know the only reason Kip puts up with you is ‘cause you’re a good lay. That’s about the only thing your good at, that and taking drugs. So why don’t you indulge a bit. Live free like you used to. Not how someone else thinks you should, ‘cause you and I both know that in the end, the only person you can rely on is yourself.’ The voice in her head castigated her.

Tears began to run down her face again. It was true. She knew it was. All she was to the people around her was a burden.

So caught up with the inner battle that was raging in her mind, she didn’t notice that Kip had woken and was walking towards her. Only when she felt one of his tattooed forearms snake round her waist and a soft kiss being placed upon the nape of her neck, did she snap out of her thoughts. She jumped lightly in shock, not expecting his touch. He pulled her tightly against his bare chest, wrapping his other arm around her as he hunched his back over, to enable him to rest his chin on her shoulder.

"What are you doin’ up Lil'?" He asked in a husky voice, obviously still half asleep.

She didn’t want to answer him, she didn’t know if she could. She was still crying and she was afraid if she opened her mouth all that would come out would be sobs. She dropped her head down and looked at the ground.

He sensed that something was up and stood up straight. Gently he turned her round to face him. Her face was still turned towards the floor. His hands traced up her arms and up her neck until finally they cupped her face. Slowly he tipped her head up to face him. Sadness struck his soul when he saw her grief stricken face. She was usually such a cheerful person who when smiled, would brighten the spirits of everyone in the room. And the same went for when she was sad, everyone around her felt it. He hated seeing her like this. She didn’t deserve to be upset after all she’d been through. He looked deep into her eyes and she looked so innocent, so lost and afraid. He leaned forward and placed a feather soft kiss on her forehead.

"What’s wrong baby?" He pleaded. But she didn’t answer and attempted to pull out of his hold on her, but he pulled her back.

"Com' on Lily baby, tell me?" She looked at him incredulously at his question, like the answer to his question wasn’t apparent.

"What’s wrong? What’s wrong? Isn’t it obvious? We’re as good as dead and you’re just acting like we haven’t a care in the world." She said in a slightly raised voice. Then she hesitated before speaking again."I’m scared" She said so quietly he had to struggle to hear her.

He pulled her tightly to him so her head rested on his shoulder. He could feel his chest get damp as her tears continued to fall.

"Shhhh. We’re gonna get through this. My brothers gonna help and in the end we’re gonna come out 200,000 richer. There is nothing to worry about."

"No, it’s not gonna be fine. Were gonna get split up." Se sobbed.

"Hey, don’t say that, no ones gonna split us up, ever. We’re a team. It’s me and you against the world. Always has been always will be. Fuck anyone who tries to tell us different" He said seriously. Silence lingered in the air for a moment.

"Can’t we just run? We can go to Mexico, I have friends there." She asked pleadingly.

"Lily you know we can’t. If we don’t face this now we’ll be running all our life."

"But at least we’ll be together"

"No, I’m not leaving. I’m not gonna let Memphis have the 200,000 grand all for himself. It was our deal and we deserve a share."

"God is that the only thing that’s important to you, the money!"

"No baby and you know that. You’re what’s important to me. But that money belongs to us. And when we get it we can pay back are debts and go on a very long vacation to Tahiti. So stop worrying and come back to bed. We’ve gotta alotta work to do in the morning so you need to sleep."

Kip unwrapped his arms from around her waist, turned and began to walk back to bed. But he sensed that she wasn’t following so he turned back to look at her.

She was still standing in the same spot, her eyes once again cast down at the wooden floor. She was nervously wringing her hands together and her half naked body shivered uncontrollably. No matter how much it hurt Kip to see her like this; it amazed him all the same. She was such a strong person who hated to show her true emotions, so this was a very rare moment. Hell, she’d never even told Kip she loved him. He’d never told her either for that fact, but he thought that it would scare her if he told her he did. He wondered if he too would be frightened if he finally admitted it to himself aloud. God, they were just too alike, probably not even what was best for each other in the long run. Sighing he walk back towards her and entwined one of his hands with hers, effectively stopping her from wringing them.
Feeling his touch her head shot up and looked at him.

‘Spaced out again’ Kip thought to himself.

"Come on" He said gently. He turned and tugged her towards the bed.

Once he reached the bed he let go of her hand and climbed in. Lying on his back he looked up at her. She was still standing at the edge of the bed. He sighed and sat forward, grabbing her hips and forcefully, but tenderly, pulling her into the bed besides him.

They lay for what seemed like an eternity, just staring into eatherthers eyes. Finally her mind began to calm and she could feel her eyelids get heavy. After a few minutes she closed them but sleep didn’t take her straight away.

Kip could see that she wasn’t asleep yet. Her breathing was still irregular. He brought his hand up and stroked it across her face.

‘God if anyone found out what a softy I was with her my street cred would seriously go down’ He thought to himself, smiling. Suddenly he became very serious though. Like a weight had been placed on his chest that made him want to blurt out everything on his mind.

"You know that I really lo…… care for you, don’t ya?"

‘Damn, you a fuckin’ chicken shit Kip. You couldn’t even say that one frickin’ word could ya?’ He thought, castigating himself.

"Hmm, I care about you to." She said sleepily. "Now let’s get some sleep ok. We need to go over things with your brother in the morning."

‘Well at least she hadn’t caught on to what I was gonna say’ he thought, almost relieved

"Ok peaches. Goodnight." He leant over and kissed her forehead.

"Goodnight" By the time she finished her sentence, she had already drifted off to sleep.
Kip sighed inwardly.

‘I’ll tell her soon, I have to’

And with that he closed his eyes and joined her in sleep
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Well that’s the first chapter. I hope you enjoyed

I know it hasn’t mentioned any TFATF characters yet but that’s coming up soon I swear. I just have to build up the plot and the characters before I get into the trouble that Dom and the crew are going to cause. So bear with me. By chapter 3 you will see them, although they will be mentioned in the next chapter.

I used a quote from the films ‘Se7en’ and ‘Basketball diaries’ in here.

Please review. It only takes a second. I’d like to hear your views. Constructive criticism is really appreciated

Well, bye for now