THE SWEET LIFE

CHAPTER TWO

"Are you sure you want to do this, Baby girl? Chicago ain't nothin like Riverton." Ennis sat with his youngest daughter in his little rented trailer.

"Yes, Daddy; I'm sure. Chicago is just the most magical place you ever did see! I just love it! When we were there last month, I just didn't want to come home. Randy's gonna intern there at the hospital and he says it's just fine with him if I go to class there and get my nursing degree. He's already got this darling little apartment and his whole family lives there. They're just wonderful people and I just couldn't possibly be any more sure of anything!"

"What's your Momma think about it?" Ennis asked.

"Oh you know her. She's been cryin and carryin on ever since I told her. She'll get over it; she always does. She's been knowing I was gonna marry Randy for two years. And now he's a real doctor and he's got a place and we're gonna get married. We figured to do it twice; once here in Riverton so you and Momma can come and then again in Chicago where all his family and friends are. It'll be really somethin special Daddy. Are you sure you don't wanna fly to Chicago with us and take a look around? I swear, it's like something out of a movie! It's just the best city ever!"

"No, Darlin, I'll come to your Riverton weddin but I ain't doin no flyin. I ain't no bird."

"Oh, Daddy!" Jenny gave her father a hug and hurried on out the door. "I gotta get to Gillette to meet Junior's plane. Now it's ten o'clock tomorrow morning at the Methodist church. Promise me you'll be there!"

"I'll be there, Jenny. I promise."

She got into her car and drove off. Ennis stood watching the road long after her trail of dust had settled; then closed his door and got out a beer. So Jenny was off to Chicago tomorrow and Junior would be returning to Anchorage, Alaska to her home after a short visit. His girls were all grown up now and off on lives of their own. He'd see them both tomorrow at the wedding then who knows when he'd get to see them again. He wasn't doing any flying, that was for sure and he sure as heck wasn't going to be driving either to Anchorage or Chicago.

Like a page turning in a book, he realized that a big part of his live was over. He had been the best Pa to his girls that he had in him to be and now they were grown and tomorrow they would be gone.

He drank until he fell asleep in his recliner and sometime in the middle of the night he stumbled over to his bed. The sun was bright when he woke up the next morning and he barely had time to wash up, scrape some whiskers, and dress for the wedding.

He hated these things; he did not do well in social functions, always kept to the side lines and exited the festivities as soon as possible. He did the same with the wedding. The church was filled with people he barely knew; and the women were all huddled together in a knot; Jenny, Junior and Alma, so he kept his distance as best he could.

Once the ceremony was over, he suffered through the photo session, the cake cutting and the first dance with his daughter. Somewhere in the back of his heart he thought it might just be the first and last dance with his daughter so this, at least, was special to him. He whispered a few things he thought might be appropriate to her as she beamed, a vision of happiness, in his arms. She would be 19 in a few months and that number held real significance to him. He remembered so well, being 19 and meeting Jack. He cursed himself for being a terrible father; dancing with his daughter and thinking about Jack.

Before he knew it, it was all over. Everyone was piling into cars and followed them to the edge of town as they took off for the airport in Gillette. Alma was waving and bawling her eyes out and Junior was trying to console her. Ennis turned his truck around and headed back to his trailer.

He had one short visit with Junior the next afternoon before she left for her flight back to Anchorage. He closed the door behind her and for the first time, felt like what he had been put on this earth to do, was done. He'd raised two beautiful girls who were loved by all who knew them. He was proud of them, proud they were a part of him.

It was later that night when the loneliness crept in. He was going to miss them. He and Jenny had become a lot closer this last year. With Junior living so far away for Kurt's work up on the pipeline, he and Jenny had spent a great deal of time together. He picked her up practically every Sunday after church and they'd have lunch together and sometimes walk in the park or go to a movie. He had known this wedding was coming but he had not been prepared for the huge hole losing his youngest daughter would leave in his life.

He was alone now; more so than he'd ever been before. His girls were gone and it might be years before he saw them again. He wasn't due to see Jack again until May; two months away. He was alone and miserable.

He sat one night in the local bar and nursed a beer. The usual crowd was settling in for another rowdy Friday night. He watched through the window as a big suburban pulled up out front and four young people got out. They came in and took a booth in the back. One of the guys and the girl were obviously a couple and two guys sat opposite them. They ordered and chatted away.

Ennis took out a cigarette and reached for his lighter and accidentally knocked it to the floor. He bent down to get it and his eyes came up he caught something that shocked him. The two young men sitting across from the couple were holding hands under the table. His breath caught in his chest and he looked quickly around the room to see if anyone else saw what he had.

He tried to look elsewhere but the booth was directly in his line of vision and they didn't seem to even notice him. The place was becoming more and more crowded and he found it difficult to take his eyes off the four young people. The two men were obviously a couple. They sat close to one another, shoulders touching, and often leaned over and said amusing things to one another. The four of them were having a good time.

Ennis finished off his beer and got out of there. He thought about them on his way home. It was a whole new world out there now if people could do such things and not be in fear for their lives. Totally different from when he was their age. Maybe they didn't know what could happen if they were found out? But the couple they were sitting with must have known. Surely they've seen the news or heard about what happens to people like them; yet there they were, sitting in a public bar holding hands. It'd be a shame if anything bad happened to them. They seemed like nice kids; probably college kids. They should know better.

Ennis was still thinking about them when he drifted off to sleep. He thought about them a lot the next week and wondered what it would be like to be that carefree, that un-afraid. He wondered what it would be like to sit in a bar with Jack and hold his hand. He cringed at the thought of one of them being drug out and beaten to death. He hoped nothing like that happened to that young couple.

He had been doing a lot of people-watching when he was in town. Lots of times he saw two men walking or drinking together and nobody paid them any mind. They were just people. He wondered if any of them were like him and Jack. He saw two women looking in a store window; one with her arm around the other's waist and they were talking and pointing to something inside. Nobody thought anything of it. He wondered about them.

He wondered if any of those people felt about each other the way he and Jack did. He wondered what it would be like for him and Jack to walk down the street and stop and look in a window together. He wondered what would happen if he put an arm around Jack. No! Nothing like that was possible. They'd be killed. He knew it. But yet, that young couple didn't seem afraid. They seemed happy. They'd been joking and laughing with their friends; friends who obviously knew they were … together.

He felt more alone now than he'd ever been before. He walked in the park one Sunday afternoon as he had done so many times before with Jenny and caught a glimpse of Alma with her grocery store husband and their two boys. They seemed to be having a good time; holding hands and laughing as the boys romped on the grass. She seemed happy and he was glad of that. He never saw much of Alma's happy face. Mostly it was sour and complaining. Well she had what she always wanted now; a house in town and a husband at her beck and call. He was glad for that; glad that he no longer had to sleep next to her or hear her whining voice begging for something he couldn't give her. He left the park without her even noticing he'd been there.

Back in his trailer he sat in his recliner and thought about Jack and how nice it would be to spend a Sunday afternoon with him. He wondered what Jack was doing and he wondered about Lureen. He wondered if she was anything like Alma and his heart went out to Jack. He wondered if they still slept together and he wondered if Jack ever turned her over, the way he did Alma, and thought of him while he was doing her. Poor Jack, he sympathized. Without thinking much past that, he reached for the phone and called Jack's number in Childress.

"Twist residence," a young man's voice answered.

"Uh … Jack Twist, please," Ennis began to waver; maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all.

"Jack Twist here," He heard that sweet voice and knew he'd done the right thing.

"Hey Jack. You busy?"

"Uh …yeah, sure thing. I've got those specifications in my office. Just hold on a minute while I change phones."

Ennis held his breath while he waited and hoped he was doing the right thing. After a few clicks on the line, Jack came back on. "Ennis?"

"Uh huh. I was just missin you and needin to hear your voice. You said I could call."

"Sure. You can call me any time, Ennis. What's on your mind?" Jack held his breath.

"I was just thinkin about you and got to missin you real bad. You ever have times like that?"

"All the time, Ennis. That's why I drink so much."

"I saw somethin the other day; somethin I never thought I'd see."

"What? What'd you see?" Jack asked leaning back in his desk chair.

"I saw two guys holdin hands, Jack. Right under the table over at the bar."

"What was you doin under the table?" Jack asked

"I dropped my lighter. I bent down to pick it up and there they was, right in front of me."

Jack didn't say anything for a minute so Ennis asked, "Jack, you still there?"

"Uh huh. I'm here. So what happened? Did the world come to an end?" He hadn't meant for it to come out sounding so sarcastic but he wasn't sorry he said it.

"Didn't seem like nobody noticed but me."

"That's cause it wasn't nobody's business; nobody else cares."

"They was real young; probably didn't know what could happen if they was seen." Ennis said.

"If they were old enough to be in a bar, they are old enough to know what they're doin."

"They acted like they wasn't worried about nothin; they were real happy sitting there laughin and talkin with their friends." Ennis explained.

"It happens, Ennis. People do live normal lives; people like us."

"People get dead too, Jack." Ennis trotted out his old argument.

"Is that why you called me; to tell me one more time why we can't be together?"

"No. I was sittin here thinkin about you; wonderin how it was with you; you and Lureen. She a good wife to you, Jack?"

"A good wife? Well let's see now. She gave me a good payin job once her Daddy died. She lets me take off whenever I want to and she don't ask no questions. She's a good Momma to my boy Bobby and sees to everythin necessary to run the business and the household. I guess you could say she's a good wife."

"You don't sound like it."

"She's a sweet person, Ennis and I never should a married her. She deserved better. But I got her pregnant so I did right by her. That's about all I can say about it."

"I saw Alma today. She was in the park with her husband and their boys. She seemed real happy. I'm glad about that." Ennis said.

"I'm glad too." Jack didn't know what else to say.

"I keep thinkin about that couple and thinkin how nice it would be if you and me could be like that."

"It'd be great, all right, Ennis. You and me together somewhere holdin hands."

"I just hope they are smart enough to keep an eye out in case anything bad happens."

"I'm sure they knew what they were doing. You said they were holding hands under the table so they were being discrete."

"Uh huh. They was for sure; and didn't seem like anyone took any notice of 'em at all."

"It wasn't nobody's business, Ennis. Most people mind their own business about such things."

"I miss you, Jack. I can't wait till May!"

"That's still sixty days away, Ennis. A long time."

"Uh huh. It sure is nice talkin to you though."

"Talkin to you just makes me want you more."

"I know, Jack. It's the same with me. I just been missin you somethin awful lately."

"Me too, Cowboy. Wish I was there with you right now. You could hold my hand or anythin else you wanted to." Jack gave a little chuckle.

"Don't go givin me any ideas; I already got enough of them runnin around in my head." Ennis said with a sigh.

"Sorry."

"It's OK. I didn't mean to make you sad, Jack."

"You don't make me sad, Ennis. You're the only thing in this world that makes me happy. It's being without you all the time that makes me sad."

"Me too, Bud; me too." Ennis didn't know what else to say so he decided to end the call. "I'd better let you go so you can get back to whatever it was you were doin."

"What I was doin, Ennis, was gettin ready to go to the liquor store so I can get drunk tonight. Lureen is out of town and Bobby is headed off with his friends."

"Guess I'll be doin the same thing, Bud; just me and Old Rose tonight."

"Thanks for tellin me about that couple. It's nice to know that somewhere in the world people like us are happy."

"We'll be happy too, Jack; when you come up here in May."

"Yeah. Uh huh. For two weeks. Then I gotta wait and wait for months before I can see you again." Jack was feelin sorry for himself.

"It's all we got, Jack," Ennis was just as miserable.

"Yeah, I know. I just can't wait to hold you in my arms again; to feel you sleepin next to me."

Ennis swallowed hard. "See you in May then."

"Uh huh."

"Bye."

"Bye."