Breaking Barriers (Chapter 28 up)

Jareth watched this occurrence within his crystal ball. Frustration etched across his features.

Little did Sarah know that the Goblin King wanted her to find that journal just as much- if not more- than she did. In fact, that had been precisely what he had planned all along.

For quite some time now Jareth had intended on using the journal as a means of trapping Sarah back in the Underground, but it wasn't until now that he had actually placed a spell upon it. He hadn't realized that Sarah would not be returning home for the entire duration of her freshman year at college, or he may have decided to pick a different object... But then again, what better object than the one that reminded her of him most? It was a somewhat romantic way to view things, a way that Jareth rarely indulged in. But it was different this time. Sarah only deserved the best. However, since he had placed the spell onto the journal, it seemed that everything was preventing her from reading it.

But not to worry, Jareth smiled to himself. He had all the time in the world- unfortunately not the patience- but the waiting was becoming more enjoyable than he had anticipated. He hadn't expected the spell would affect Sarah so. From the spell, she was receiving an all-consuming desire to find that notebook. If Jareth had been smiling before, then he now was positively grinning from ear to ear.
Yes, Jareth found this amusing, quite amusing indeed.

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Sarah, frustrated with the little help she had received from her parents, decided to try and find the notebook herself. As she made her way back to Toby's room, Sarah thought to herself.

Sarah hadn't the vaguest idea why she needed that journal. She only knew that she had to find it, no matter what it took. She wanted to pull her hair out by the roots in frustration. The tapping on her shoulder was becoming much more forceful. She almost winced from the pain of it.

Sarah reached Toby's room to try and discover where he had put the journal. At this point, she had no other choice. And Sarah didn't even want to think of what would happen if she waited unoccupied for his return, alone with her thoughts. She had to do something. Besides, how many places could a five year old hide a journal?

Almost two hours into her searching, Sarah realized that she had greatly underestimated her little brother. She had looked behind every stuffed animal, underneath every blanket and behind every shelf-but still no journal. He must have put it somewhere other than his bedroom. Sarah nearly writhed in frustration. What happened if he had hid it in her parent's bedroom, or outside? The boy wouldn't be home for at least another two hours. She didn't know if she could wait that long. But even as she thought this, the logical part of Sarah's mind scolded her. How could she possibly be so desperate for that book that couldn't wait a mere two hours? But deep in her gut, Sarah felt differently. Deep down, she doubted she'd make it as long as two hours with her sanity intact.

Sarah went back to her room and lay down in exhaustion. She had hardly gotten any sleep the past night and what she sleep she had claimed had been restless and abstract. She just needed to rest for a moment to recuperate. Then, it would be back to searching. But as Sarah lay on her bed, she began to doze off. Slowly, the area about her became hazy. Once again, Sarah gazed at her Escher poster. But this time, not only was she lost within its depths, she was consumed by it. Sarah fell into a restless sleep, dreaming a vivid hallucination.

Sarah was walking within the Escher poster, unable to tell up from down and right from left. Her world was turned upside down. Or rightside up. Or across sideways frontways, or diagonal sideways backwards upside down. Sarah couldn't keep track of them all. Nevertheless, she found a set of stairs and climbed until she was heavily fatigued. But she did not give up. She knew she couldn't, not yet. She was looking for something... she was sure she was...

Sarah's thoughts were suddenly sidetracked. A crystal ball bounced up the stairs. Sarah followed it with her eyes, a look of wonder on her face. She knew that something about a ball- a crystal ball, at that- bouncing UP stairs was not quite correct, but she was still fascinated by it. Because of that fascination, she followed it step by step. It was monotonous. The ball gave a "ping" every time it made contact with a stair. Step. Ping. Step. Ping. It went on for what seemed like forever...

It's not long at all...

Without warning, the ball dropped off a ledge. Sarah was not prepared for the change. Suddenly, her mind was screaming at her to stop, but her body was not reacting fast enough. She was falling... falling...

Warm arms held her body up. Hard strength kept her from falling... Suddenly she realized she was in a gown- that same Cinderella-type ball gown that she had worn at a masquerade where only herself plus one other's identity had been revealed... After this realization, Sarah began to wonder exactly what it was that had kept her from falling. Sarah slowly looked up and into a pair of eyes. A pair of eyes that did not match- one hazel, one blue...

Sarah was glad she found what she had been searching for...

"Sarah! Sarah wake up!" came an exasperated voice.

Sarah's eyes fluttered open to reveal another pair of eyes. But these eyes were not mismatched or in any way mysterious, they were blue and young and full of anxiety. Upon seeing her awake, Toby exclaimed:

"Finally, Sarah, it took you long enough!"

Sarah sat up in her bed suddenly. She had been dreaming again. Once more she had to shake its effects from her mind. She felt groggy and stupid from her dream-filled sleep.

"Toby?' she muttered, "I needed you for something, but I can't quite remember..."

Sarah's eyes flew open wide. The journal, of course. How could she keep forgetting? Sarah grasped hold of Toby. She wasn't trying to scare him, she only knew that she had to make it clear to him how very important it was he gave her that notebook.

"Toby," Sarah spoke sincerely, "Mom said you had a green notebook with you the other day and that you were coloring in it. Do you remember this?"

Toby shifted uncomfortably.

"You're mad at me, aren't you?" Toby looked at her through worried eyes, "I'm sorry Sarah..."

Sarah tried to keep her voice low and convincing. She could be mad at him later. Right now she needed that book.

"I'm not mad at you, Toby," Sarah gritted her teeth to keep her voice from trembling, "I just need you to find that book for me. Do you remember where you put it?"

"You promise you won't get mad?" he asked cautiously.

Sarah began to worry. Had the boy thrown it away or something? What could he have possibly done that would make him so upset? It took all of Sarah's strength not to grasp his shoulders and shake the answer out of him. But she took a mental pause and collected her wits.

"I promise, just show me where it is."

Toby continued to look at her warily, but slowly slipped his hand inside hers.

"Follow me," he said seriously.

Toby led Sarah down to the garage and slowly opened the door. He brought her to a dark corner and let go of her hand to retrieve something off the concrete floor. Toby picked it up and brought it into the light, futilely trying to dust it off.

"I-I'm sorry, Sarah. I was coloring in it, but I must have left it by itself somewhere. Merlin found it and-" he handed it to her, apparently at a loss for words.'

"I'm sorry," he said again in a pathetic voice.

Even as Sarah closed her hand around the object of desire, she felt despair creeping in. There was hardly anything left to the notebook. It was tattered and crusted with what must have been dog drool. It looked awful and it certainly didn't look like there was much left to what Sarah had written in it.

"Y-you're not mad at me, are you Sarah?" Toby spoke quietly, on the verge of tears.

Sarah let out a sigh. She knew how desperate Toby was to please her. In his mind, hiding the notebook had been a tactful thing to do. He had kept it from her so that she wouldn't get upset. She wearily patted him on the shoulder.

"No. No, I'm not mad. Go on inside, Toby."

Toby started to leave, turned his head and looked piteously at her, then silently left her. Sarah was, in fact, a little angry, but not at Toby. She wondered at herself for having such a strong need to read this book. It didn't make any sense. She had put this notebook away four years ago, firmly intending to never read it again. It was something that signified her old life- and her old life was no longer a part of her.

Sarah left the garage and went out into the sunlight. She was disgusted that this book was actually supposed to bring her some sort of satisfaction, but also worried that, given its present state, would not appease her driven curiosity- and that she would be left in the dark. She didn't understand how, but she knew she would eventually be driven mad without the memories this book had once contained.

Sarah flipped through the pages. Sluggishly, a feeling of dread settled itself in her stomach. It was that same feeling of dread that she had felt every hour within the Labyrinth. The book had been almost completely destroyed, worse than she had first surmised. She could hardly read any of it. Now and then a word would pop out at her, making her heart jump with excitement, but it was never even as much as a sentence- something that would have put at least some idea of a memory within her. What hadn't been covered in Toby's drawings had been destroyed by the dog. Sarah cursed herself for having written it in pencil. And, even though she knew she was deceiving herself, she continued to look desperately.

Finally, after she had almost given up hope, Sarah's heart leapt inside her. There was a paragraph at the beginning of the journal that was completely unscathed. Sarah wondered at this curiosity, but not for long. She greedily read a small portion from the true story she had written four long years ago:

"Someone has been in my room again! I hate that!"

Sarah stormed into her parent's bedroom where Toby slept, anger boiling inside her. On the floor of the room lay Lancelot, her most cherished teddy bear. The child didn't even see fit to put the bear in the crib with him. He had just left it on the floor like a piece of garbage, waiting to collect dust. Beyond the bear on the floor stood Toby in his crib, bawling like there was no tomorrow. Sarah glared at him.

"I hate you. I hate YOU!!" Sarah grasped Lancelot and clutched him to her body. She looked heavenward, hoping that someone, anyone, was listening to her plea.

"Someone save me. Someone take me away from this awful place!"

That's as far as Sarah could read. Everything before and after was either torn apart or unreadable. Sarah wondered again why this was the only single page that had survived. It wasn't even difficult to decipher. Maybe she was being paranoid, she thought to herself, but she felt that it had been laid out specifically for her, and was meant to maintain what it had looked like exactly as it had four years ago. By whom or what was beyond Sarah. But, once again, she did not try very hard to think what this could mean. And slowly, a silly grin spread across her face. She had found her notebook. She pressed it to herself in childish glee. Now she only prayed that this one memory would stave off that grim insanity for the remainder of her life. Then, as if to cherish this happy moment, Sarah again read the words:

"Someone save me. Someone take me away from this awful place!"

And was plunged into memory.

Sarah remembered how she had felt when she had said those words. With amazing clarity she remembered the hot anger she had felt inside her that day. She was furious that she had to stay in this dull, impossible place where all she did- to her mind- was stay at home and watch her insatiable younger brother, Toby. She remembered her frustration at being unable to calm the child and knowing that that's how he was when he was first born, and how he would probably always be.

But most of all -Sarah sighed to herself at this thought- she remembered the longing. The absolute, overwhelming desire to go to magical places and witness amazing things. To have adventures and sail on the border between imagination and reality. As she spoke those words, she had felt in her heart that her entire life of longing and dreaming had been building up to that moment. Sarah hadn't felt that way for four whole years. She had put away her childish dreams and with that action, her silly emotions as well.

At least, until now.

Sarah felt a sudden burning desire within her. It fluttered slowly in her heart at first, then expanded as a butterfly taking wing, sending waves of colorful emotion to every nerve in her body. It was an exact replica of what she had felt four years ago and, so strong was this emotion, that she gasped aloud at the heat of it. She was, quite suddenly, tired of her life once again. School had certainly not panned out, at least this first year, and her life had been boring and devoid of any magical pleasure- including the simple act of daydreaming. She had denied herself that pleasure for four years, but now she wanted it back. She wanted the magic back and she wanted it more than ever before.

And that's when Sarah's blood began to stir. That's when her breath turned red with longing. And that's when her dreams became a reality. Sarah felt her being stretch far and wide and saw stars before her. That's when Sarah knew beyond any measure of doubt that something amazing and magical was happening to her.
And that's when Sarah's world caved in.

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A/N My oh my what is happening to Sarah? And how does Toby STILL manage to inextricably entwine Sarah further into the Labyrinth?

Thanks for reading~ TheArtist

(edit) I've been noticing there are a couple blank parts in my story where for whatever reason my copy/paste method decided not to work. If you check back later hopefully the missing parts will be filled in. Sorry for any inconvenience... darn technology *snarl*