An Even Greater Sin

Chapter 19: Raging behind, in the head...

Darth Vader clenched the handrail of the walkway, warping the steel with powerful prosthetic fingers. Damn that boy! What was he thinking?

That Force-presence called out to him more than ever, filling his dark spirit with a sensation that Vader couldn't for the life of him name. He was outraged that Luke could manipulate his soul so easily- the boy was probably unaware of it, too.

Never had Vader craved something so badly. He felt immense shame at having such thoughts- they were unfaithful to HER.

He had been unfaithful to HER. And SHE had paid the price.

But the boy had been the one that he had wanted so desperately as to be disloyal. Luke was all he had left of HER, but he was trying to make Vader forget all about HER.

And that was something Darth Vader could never do.

In annoyance, Vader slammed a leather-clad steel fist on the handrail, before turning and entering the lift Luke had been taken through. His shuttle was waiting. The Emperor was waiting.

Luke had been escorted into a holding cell aboard the shuttle, noting that the troops walked on eggshells around him. They clearly didn't want Lord Vader's prize prisoner harmed.

He rested his cuffed wrists on his knees, leaning against the bulkhead wearily. He was worn out, but completely wired. His eyes were unfocused with adrenaline, and he could feel his pulse shooting through his system faster than he knew was healthy.

Palpatine. The very notion of encountering the Sith again sent his stomach into convulsions of pure revulsion. He could still feel the results of the violation of his freedom, in the ache of his scraped, torn rectum. He still heard the rasping laugh as his identity was ripped from his weakened mind, to be used to lie to Anakin. He still felt traces of the electricity striking through his nerves.

He wanted to kill Palpatine.

But he had to keep his mind clear of such vengeful thoughts. To desire revenge was a form of aggression, which would lead him to the Dark side.

Luke repeated this mantra within his mind, hoping that it would become part of his heart as well.

Palpatine gave a slow smile of dark bliss, drinking in the eventuality of his victory. It was a given. He had worked too hard to place barriers between the Skywalkers.

He sensed them drawing near, now, as their shuttle began its takeoff from the Endor moon.

Luke looked up as the door whooshed open, wondering for a nanosecond why they were opening it so soon after liftoff.

That wondering was replaced by a thrill of both fear and joy as Vader stalked into the cell, the hiss of his respirator echoing Luke's own breath. Vader stood there for what seemed an eternity, before turning to leave.

Luke couldn't suppress the mental expression of loneliness. Vader halted, and glanced back at Luke.

With what might have been a grunt of disdain, Vader returned, to sit on the edge of the panel that served as a cot for the cell's occupant. He stayed as far away from Luke as possible, but Luke was grateful even for this moment of silent companionship. He sent through the Force a quiet, "Thank you," which Vader didn't outwardly acknowledge.

But he did return through the Force a simple, "Ssh."

Vader had no idea why he was remaining in the boy's cell. Logic pounded on his helmet, screaming in his ear for him to wake up and get out, but he just couldn't obey that logic.

The boy's energy was different, now- more fearful, less focused on Vader than before. Luke was afraid of facing the Emperor, and Vader supposed that he had a good reason. It wasn't every day that the Empire's most wanted man is taken before the leader of the galaxy.

The boy reached out to him now, in a way that made Vader's heart ache. The contact was timid, repressed, a whisper of what he had given while they spoke on the forest moon. He wasn't showing his lust so clearly now. Vader silently thanked the Force and the boy.

Luke was powerful, indeed- his power called out to Vader with something deeper than ambition, something that he couldn't place.

Luke was thankful that his wrists were bound- he had an immense desire to wrap his arms around Vader's neck, seeking comfort.

Vader silently damned those binders that held Luke at his mercy. The temptation to embrace the boy, to hold him and comfort him, was made all the worse by the fact that the boy was helpless before him. He could do anything he wanted to Luke- hit him, hold him, anything but what he dared not desire.

He wanted to kiss the boy.

Luke kept his silence, feeling his father's Force so strongly it pained his heart. Vader was so isolated, so alone, that Luke could sense it clearly even as Vader struggled to hide it from himself.

Luke tried to give back subtle shades of warmth, to soothe his father, to give him warmth, to prove that his interest in Vader went beyond physical passion. To prove that he actually cared. He wanted to live in this moment forever, to have the time to bring Vader's heart to the surface, but he knew that their time was short.

He merely took what comfort he could from the company of the one he loved.

Vader could feel the boy trying to reach him- to caress his mind with the Force, to bring out the terrifying emotions Vader couldn't name.

He fought to avoid sending back the thoughts of his desires.

They felt the ship land at the same time. Vader rose, and Luke followed. Neither wanted to leave this time, this place, this state of being, but both were afraid of staying.

Father and Son exited the shuttle to face their future, their destiny...

To face themselves.