A Pirates Passion

Chapter 22

Madeline nodded at him. It was time to say goodbye to her daughter and time to start living again. She looked up at him. "Will ye help me Jack" she asked him cupping his cheeks in her hands. “Will ye help me to love again?”

Jack looked at her"Let's just not rush into anything too quickly. I'm learning to trust again myself remember" he told her.

Madeline lowered her head. "I understand Jack." She stood and reached for his hand. "Walk with me"

Jack took it and held it loosely"Where are we going" he asked,

"Just walking Jack." She said quietly as they walked through the surf. "So what was your favorite place you took JJ"

Jack thought about it. "Just being with him was all that mattered to me, didn't matter where we were, he seemed to like Spain. I took him to a bull fight" he laughed.

Madeline smiled. "I bet he loved that." She said as the waves came in fast. She scrambled to get out of the way and laughed when the bottom of her skirts got soaked.

Jack looked out at the horizon. He was deep in thought so he became very quiet.

Madeline glanced at him but didn't say anything. She knew he was thinking. He always got very quiet when he was thinking. She let go of his hand and wrapped her shawl tighter around her shoulders. She followed his gaze to the horizon.

"I can't give it up Maddy" he said softly his eyes never leaving the horizon.

"I never asked you to, nor would I ever ask you to give it up Jack. It's in your blood. It's what you were born to do." She said quietly looking at him. "It's your soul."

"So how do I choose" Jack asked.

"Choose" She questioned. "Jack, if you want to take JJ with you again, I won't stand in your way." She said quietly.

Jack sighed"I know you too well Maddy. You won't be happy until I've given up the sea. How can I have both and not either make you or myself feel cheated" he asked.

Madeline faced him. "I wouldn't be happy unless you are happy Jack. Being at sea makes you happy. Don't you think I know that" She said sternly. Her face softened. She reached up to touch his cheek. "Jack, you belong on the sea. Having your son with you would make you doubly happy. I wouldn't hate you Jack." She said quietly.

Jack winced and moved away from her touch, he was torn, he loved her and yet he was scared to trust her. "I could use a drink, then a good nights sleep" he said and started walking back down the beach toward her house.

Madeline sighed and looked to the heavens as Jack turned away from her. She hurried to catch up with him. "I have rum and wine." She said as she walked through the sand with him. A breeze had kicked up and the wind had turned cooler.

"If rum's around ye know I'll always choose it, that will never change" Jack smirked. He put his arm around her shoulders"Ye seem a bit cold love" he said gently.

Madeline smiled at him. "The breeze is cooler than it has been lately." She said and moved a bit closer to him. Even if this was all she could have, she would take it. She had been cold for a long time.

"Good spot of rum should warm ye right up and I'll build a fire in the fireplace if ye'd like" Jack told her.

"That would be nice Jack." She said looking up at him. They reached her house in a short time. She checked on JJ who was sprawled out on his bed, sound asleep. She went to the kitchen and got the bottle of rum along with two glasses. She went into the sitting room and saw Jack had built a roaring fire.

"He asleep" Jack asked.

Madeline smiled as she handed him a glass. "Aye. Sprawled out. I tried to cover him, but he kicked the covers off." She poured rum into his glass and then into hers.

Jack chuckled"Sounds like me when I was a boy, my mother wondered how I didn't catch a death of cold" he told her.

Madeline smiled. "He's done that ever since he was a baby." She said and turned away to sit down. "Is the rum alright" She asked swallowing down the contents of her glass.

Jack swirled it around"I'm sure it's fine, so tell me why you didn't marry the Commodore" he asked.

Madeline looked at him with her eyes wide. She stood and refilled her glass. "I couldn't." She said quietly.

"It was obvious to me that the man loved you, very much. I'm sure he was good to you, so tell me why and don't lie to me" Jack said taking his first sip.

Madeline stared into the fire as she sat back down. "Aye, he did love me. He was very good to me." She said quietly. "But after Angel was born. The doctor told me that because of how difficult her birth was and because of the injuries I suffered because of my fall, I would never have another child. He wanted a family." She took a swallow of her rum. "He thought it was because of you and I suppose in the deep recess of my mind, it was partially true. But after what Jacquette did to me and to our child, I couldn't stay there. I couldn't look at him everyday and know how much he resented the fact that I would never bear his child."

Jack filled his glass and let out a heavy sigh"I think I'm going to take me rum and go to bed. Good night Maddy" he said softly.

Madeline closed her eyes and lowered her head. "And I told him that I would never again hurt those that I love because all I do is bring them pain." She stood and slowly walked towards the hallway. "Your room is across from JJ's." She said pointing to a door. "Good night Jack." She whispered.

"Maddy the only way to stop hurting the ones ye love is to stop loving them and then only if they forget ye, so yer wishing on a star love" Jack told her before going into the room and closing the door behind him.

Madeline hurried to her room and quickly undressed. She climbed into bed and pulled the covers up high. She fell into a fitful and restless sleep. Her dreams were filled with nightmares. Horrible images of Jacquette doing things to JJ, Jack and Angel. She woke in a cold sweat. Her heart raced. She hurried out of bed and ran to the front porch. She needed air. She felt as if she were suffocating.

Jack heard her when she left her room. He wasn't sleeping well so he got up and followed her from a distance. Deciding not to speak until she looked at him, he watched her for a long time.