Unforgivable

Wow. Thank you seems hardly adequate for the fantastically kind reviews I've had for this story. I can't tell you how thrilled I am to know it is being enjoyed so much...
This chapter was a bit of a self-perpetuating monster...it's the longest so far, and the consequences will have to be dealt with in the next one...which I have made a start on already, I promise!!
(Oh, btw - Rosa, the E-mail address you gave me won't work, hun...)

Here you go then... hope you like it!!!

Jack threw down his pen and sighed. Plotting a course that allowed for more frequent stops was making life decidedly more complicated – not to mention risky. He wondered uncomfortably how the crew would react when they realised his new and potentially dangerous strategy. Then, recalling Lizzie’s tearful face, he pushed such thoughts firmly to the back of his mind. They’d live with it. They’d have to. Because he intended to do whatever necessary to give her the child they both wanted so much…

The cabin door swung open, interrupting his reverie, and Lizzie herself stumbled in.

He took in her flushed face and sparkling eyes with a slightly nervous grin.

“What trouble’ve ye been up to now, Missis Sparrow? That’s a guilty look if ever I saw one.”

“Oh!” Breathless and blushing, she took his outstretched hand and let him pull her into his lap.

“Nothing, not me! It’s - I saw – just now, out on deck - one behind the other! They were doing – well - that! But the one in front - oh Jack! He had his – I thought I must be seeing things but he did, he really was, in the barrel!”

She paused dramatically, somewhat disconcerted by his lack of concern at this shocking revelation. “Did you not hear what I said? He was using the BARREL, Jack! He had his – in the hole, and he was – he was-”

Jack’s moustache quivered frantically.

“That’s an indisputably terrible travesty luv,” he said at last, speaking slowly to keep the dangerous wobble in his voice at bay. “Such carryings on should undoubtedly be conducted only in the darkest corners of me ship, away from the prying eyes of wanderin’ young women, and only then wiv the barrels what’ve been officially designated by the Captain for such purposes.”

Elizabeth’s horrified expression was too much; he clamped one hand firmly across his mouth, shoulders shaking frantically.

A moment later he yelped in pain.

“Oy! That bloody hurt!”

“STOP laughing at me then, or I’ll pull harder!” She adjusted her grip on his dreads and glared, unrepentant. “It’s not funny, it’s – ugh! Horrible! Disgusting and depraved! Not to mention highly unsanitary and – and - dangerous!”

“Careful there Lizzie. Yer soundin’ like a prissy young wench.”

“Hah! Fine chance of that with the company I keep. I just don’t understand - why on earth would he want to DO that?”

“S’only natural, luv if ye think on it. Long time b’tween ports and all that.”

“But for heavens sake – he could have hurt himself!”

“Not if he were careful an’ greased-up well. Don’t hurt hardly at all - does a fine job, in point of fact. Makes a nice change from fumblin’ in yer breeches at any rate.”

She shot him a quick, suspicious look.

“Oh no. Please tell me you haven’t…”

“It IS a long time atween ports, luv,” Jack smirked. “An’ since the captains I served under weren’t s’keen on the idea of carryin’ strumpets aboard, us crew had t’find other ways o’curin’ that infernal and most pleasurable of aches. Oww!”

He caught her wrist and made a vain attempt to loosen her tear-inducing grip.

“Be nice! I’ve not pleasured meself that way in years, not since I’ve had a crew of me own t’command. Wouldn’t seem fittin’ somehow, fer them t’find their Captain swivin’ a barrel.”

“Not fitting? It’s – it’s perverse. Horrible!”

“No. Well alright, yes, I s’pose it’s a trifle perverse - but only in a good way. Besides,” he went on, fingers trailing a soothing path up and down her spine, “I’ve no need fer barrels wiv you t’warm me bed, now have I?”

“Perhaps you should have one fetched. Perhaps I feel inclined to sleep alone after hearing one of my predecessors was a piece of cargo!”

“No call t’be jealous, luv. Though I must own there’s one aboard right now…a fine, curvaceous, lusty young barrel that still carries the intoxicatin’ aroma of ru…Buggerin’ hell! Will ye leave go o’me bloody hair!”

“Stop teasing me then, you awful man.”

“Actually, me prim an’ proper little lass, m’feelin’ rather more teased than teasin’.”

Gripping her thigh, he pressed her a little harder into his lap. “That’s not me pistol proddin’ yer leg.”

“I did notice. Hard not to.”

“‘Hard’ being a most suitable and indicative word…”

Elizabeth rolled her eyes, then looked down as his arm crept around her waist.

“Don’t you ever get enough? Can’t you think of anything else?”

“Course. Can fill me head wiv all manner o’dull an’ high-minded notions if there’s a need fer it.”

Having loosening her breeches with practised ease, the tanned, slender fingers disappeared beneath the material. When they reached their destination she gave an involuntary hiss of pleasure that made his lips curve upwards and his eyes gleam smugly.

“Well, well. Not so adverse t’the suggestion I were suggesting, if the evidence in front of me eyes – er- under me hand - is t’be believed, young missy.”

She made a half-hearted grab for his sleeve. “That’s as maybe, but it doesn’t necessarily mean I intend to let you…”

“See the thing is, darlin’” he went on, moving his fingers over her in a way that made her traitorous body shiver with delight, “When I’ve a delectably distractin’ beauty such as yerself wrigglin’ in me lap it’d be a tragic waste t’think of anythin’ else. Would be likely indicative of me sudden and irrevocable descent into madness, soon t’be followed by me sad demise, were I t’be thinkin’ of anythin’ other than how badly I need t’swive ye again at the earliest opportunity. Savvy?”

“You’re incorrigible.”

“No, luv. I’m Captain Ja…”

The rest of his words were lost as she leant towards him and caught his lower lip gently but firmly between her teeth.

“Do shut up, Jack!” she hissed, letting go, and a heartbeat later his mouth slammed over hers.

He was hungry for her and he let her know it. Between her thighs his fingers echoed the thrust of his tongue until she squirmed helplessly against him, gasping her pleasure into the heat of his mouth. Then, ever hopeful, Jack slid his other hand down her back and inside her breeches.

Tracing gentle circles over the base of her spine, he worked his way steadily lower. But when one cautious finger probed between the high, rounded cheeks of her bottom she tensed instinctively and arched away. Jack broke the kiss, pulled his hand away and smiled ruefully.

“Still not, then? Pity. Can’t blame a man fer tryin’, though!”

She smiled – and something in her eyes sent a rush of heat straight to his groin.

“Will you tell me what it’s like, Jack? How it feels to – to be taken like that?”

“ Why? Are ye thinkin’ of changing yer m…”

“Just curious,” she said quickly, avoiding his gaze.

“Ah. Well that’s very interesting…”

“Jack!”

“Alright. Purely in the interests of satisfyin’ yer curiosity then.”

Ducking forward so that his triumphant grin was tactfully hidden behind a thick curtain of hair, he carefully rearranged his features into what he hoped was a nonchalant expression before meeting her gaze again.

“It’s spectacular, luv. Awe-inspirin’. A unique an’ deliciously delectable experience; a galluptious feast of enchantment.”

She snorted.

“Really? Are you sure you’re not being overly…persuasive Jack?”

“S’true darlin’, I swear it. Specially fer me, bein’ a man an’ all. Feels different t’be on the other end o’things, as it were. I’ll tell ye, luv, when I’m takin’ it in me – er, when I’m on the receivin’ end, so to speak – it’s somethin’ special. S’good t’be taken sometimes, Lizzie. Somethin’ I get a lot o’pleasure from. Always have.”

“Oh.”

There didn’t seem much else to say about this rather discomforting statement; determinedly pushing it aside for the moment, she pressed on.


“What if I – that is, the other person - is uncertain? Feeling… nervous perhaps? A little unsure?”

“Then,” he said slowly, “It’s not so good.”

“Would it hurt?”

“Aye it does. A lot.”

Now it was his turn to look away. Elizabeth winced.

“Oh Jack…”

“Ancient history. Forgotten now. Unimportant.”

He shrugged, but the sudden tension in his body belayed his words.

“Truth is Lizzie, I’ve been buggered in all manner of ways. Both literally and figuratively. Been times when me body was all I had t’bargain with. Had t’offer meself up fer negotiation, as it were. After the first few times I learned t’go along wiv it. Better than fightin’ and gettin’ taken anyway. Hurt less.”

Glancing up, Jack met her stricken gaze and hurriedly looked away again.

‘Brilliant, Sparrow,” he berated himself. “Incredibly, bloody, brilliant. Impeccable timing. Why can ye not keep control of yer bloody stupid mouth when she’s about? Just when her curiosity’s takin’ such an intriguing turn and you in the perfect condition to satisfy it….’

He scowled, shifting uncomfortably to ease the nagging – and, he thought sulkily, reproachful ache in his groin.

“What would it – did it - feel like, for you?”

“Eh?”

His head came up with a jerk.

The expression on her face made his breath catch and the front of his breeches grow even tighter.

“I said, what’s it like for you? When it’s you, doing – that - to someone else?”

“Oh, tis a heady feelin’ Lizzie,” he enthused, trying very hard to keep the pleading tone from his voice. “Steals the thoughts right out of me head, bein’ gripped that tight an' fierce. Like I’ve a fever. Gets me that hot and hard – ‘til m’desperate t’spend. An’ when I finally do, it’s just – well - tis bloody amazin’!”

“I see. Thank you - that was very...informative.”

Nodding, she stared thoughtfully at the floor. Jack watched her, chewing anxiously on his lip and praying, really hard

Suddenly he could bear it no longer.

“Elizabeth darlin’, please. Tell me if yer goin’ t’let me-”

“Yes.”

“Cause I promise I’ll be very – what?”

“Yes. I’m going to let you try it again.”

He expressed his gratitude in the most eloquent and appropriate of manners.

“Did I tell ye lately how much I love you Lizzie Sparrow?” he panted, when they finally came up for air. “Yer goin’ t’love this, I promise. I’ll make sure of it.”

She stared at him, wide-eyed and solemn. His kisses had left her breathless and trembling as always – but there was more than just desire making her heart race this time.

“Do ye trust me Elizabeth?”

“Of course.”

“Then ye’ve no need t’fret. Just tell me t’stop an’ I promise I will. Alright?”

“Yes. Alright.”

Gently he lifted her up, tenderly he undressed her.

“There, now. S’much more better.”

“What about you?”

“Not yet. Too soon.”

She looked pointedly at his bulging crotch.

“All evidence to the contrary, Captain Sparrow!”

He followed her gaze, then met her eyes again with a wry grin.

“Told ye I’ll stop if ye want an’ I will. But y’have a deplorable effect on me self-control at times, luv. Better if I keep meself under wraps, as it were. Fer now.”

“No. This is for both of us, not just me! Please, Jack.”

“Lizzie, I really don’t thi…”

His protest ended abruptly with the firm press of her palm between his thighs.

“Not…fair…” he hissed, but made no move to stop her as she tugged off his belts and sash, pulled open the straining buttons of his breeches.

He spilled out with a grunt of relief, and they both looked down as his impressive erection bobbed gently back towards his stomach.

“Can’t say I didn’t warn ye…”

“Stop worrying. That’s my job. Yours is to make me love this, remember?”

“So it is. An’ wiv that in mind – see that glass jar over there? The short fat one? Bring it t’me. M’not in a state t’be walkin’ very easy, an' we need it.”

“We do?”

He answered her questioning look with a wink, and sat down.

She sighed, and fetched the jar.


“Ta darlin’.” Plucking it from her hand, Jack prised the lid off and peered inside. “Hope there’s still enough.”

“What is it?”

“Me best friend - afore ye came along. Yep. S’plenty.”

“But what is it?”

He answered her by scooping out a generous handful of what looked suspiciously like lantern oil.

“What on earth is that fo…Ah. Of course.”

“Makes it easier, see? A lot more better.”

“Yes.” She watched the oil drip slowly from the tips of his fingers and swallowed hard. “I suppose it would.”

Jack met her quick, nervous grin with a dark, hungry look, and her stomach clenched with desire – and apprehension.


“Come t’me,” he whispered, and she did, powerless to resist the hypnotic beauty of those deep brown eyes or that darkly seductive voice.

“There now,” he crooned, having pulled her onto his lap, facing away from him. “Going to take it nice and easy now, we’ve all the time in th…Bloody HELL!”

Grease-smeared fingers skittered across her hip, scrabbling for purchase.

He drew in a deep, shuddery breath.

“Lizzie?”

“Mmm?”

“Not a good idea, luv.”

“Feels pretty good to me…”

He whimpered softly and looked down to where her fist moved with agonising slowness over slick, throbbing flesh.

“M’tryin’ really hard t’behave. Yer not helpin’.”

“I’m fine,” she murmured, not altogether truthfully. “I really do want this…”

And for once Jack’s uncanny knack of seeing straight through her bravado failed him.

Deaf to everything but the insistent and all-encompassing needs of his body, one oil-drenched hand expertly stroked and massaged her bottom, while the other slid around her waist and crept up to lavish similar attention on her breasts.

His mouth trailed hot, wet kisses along her neck, murmuring encouragement and endearments as slowly, gradually, she succumbed to him.

Elizabeth was lost. Every place he touched felt exquisitely sensitive, each caress a delicious, unbearable agony. She wanted to go on forever like this, held in this ecstatic, intoxicating place; she wanted it to be over, to be released from this blissful purgatory.

Suddenly his fingers were probing the place she’d denied him entrance before and the hazy fog of arousal receded, bought the reality of what they were about to do sharply back into focus.

An instinctive denial rose in her throat as he pushed a fingertip inside, and her body tensed in protest at this strange invasion.

He crooned affectionate nonsense in her ear, neither moving or withdrawing, waiting for the initial shock of it to subside.

Not so bad after all, she decided, as her body adjusted to the sensation. Rather compelling, in fact…perhaps if she pushed back against him a little…Oh! Oh yes, that felt surprisingly good…

With a groan of approval he pushed a little deeper and began to move his finger in slow and careful circles. When his other hand slid down her belly, over her damp curls and lower, her soft gasps of pleasure intensified the throbbing ache in his balls to almost unbearable proportions.

Helpless, adrift on waves of ecstatic sensation, she was a willing prisoner trapped between those wicked, wonderful hands. The words he was hissing in her ear now were meaningless, as was the desperation behind them.

“Tell me now!” he repeated urgently. “Can’t wait no more Lizzie, if ye want no more than this ye have t’tell me now!”

Another low, breathy moan signalled consent to his lust-addled brain. Too aroused for coherent thought – or gentleness – he yanked his hands away, grasped her hips and shoved her unceremoniously to her feet.

One moment she was trembling on the brink of orgasm - the next she was being jerked upright and pushed forward over the desk. Before she could protest at this rough and shocking treatment his hands were on her bottom, spreading her open, and she felt the pressure of him there, slick and hot and impossibly huge.

“No you can’t, you’re too big…” she hissed, but either her panicked pleas were too quiet to hear or he was too aroused to listen.

“Please don’t, you can’t, you won’t fi….OHHH!!”

With one quick thrust he’d done it; pushed his way inside a part of her that was surely not designed to accommodate anything so large. The pain was exquisite. Tears filled her eyes and she clenched her fists, panting hard. It felt as though he would split her in two.

“Stop now,” she whimpered, but the only response was the harsh sound of his breathing and the trembling of his hands against her skin. He was motionless inside her – and after a moment the pain began to dissipate, fade to discomfort – then, amazingly, blossomed into something disconcertingly close to pleasure.

Now she was confused; fear and lust flooding through her body in equal measures. Did she LIKE this? Was this a terrible, agonising intrusion – or unprecedented bliss?

If – when - he moved, would it hurt again or make this feel even better?

As though he’d read her thoughts the pressure receded slightly as he rocked back, swelled once more as he pushed forward again, a little deeper this time. The sensation wrenched a cry from her throat that was somewhere between joy and terror and she clutched the edge of the desk, desperately seeking an anchor. A moment later he groaned deep in his throat and began to thrust in earnest, a quick, desperate rhythm that left her dazed brain reeling and threatened to knock her off her feet.

Jack felt as though he were in the grip of a terrible fever. He was trembling violently, shaking and sweating like a man possessed. This was agony, this was ecstasy - and he couldn’t take much more of it. She was so tight it was almost painful, too tight to bear more than the shallowest of penetrations – but the pressure was incredible, exhilarating, exciting him beyond endurance.

“Please,” he mouthed. “Oh god…oh Lizzie… help me…”

It held him there, on the knife edge between pleasure and pain, for an endless eternity. Then it began, coursing through his body like the tremors of an earthquake, and his fingers bit deep into the soft flesh of her thighs.

He heard her pained gasp, and the flash of remorse that followed was his last coherent thought. It was coming, he was coming, and the powerful, earth-shattering contractions seemed to radiate through every part of him, from the soles of his feet to the very roots of his hair.

It was shaking him apart, stealing his body and soul. An instant later all the terrifyingly wonderful sensations coalesced and rushed towards the place where they were joined. He cried out, felt his balls throb and jerk, and his explosive release began with enough force to push him free of her body.

Elizabeth gasped again at the burst of heat in such an unfamiliar place, but before she had time to process how it felt the strange, intriguing pressure was gone and he was arching over her, the sweat-soaked cotton of his shirt rough and clammy against her skin.

His arms wound tight around her waist and his breath rasped hotly in her ear as the rest of his semen was ejected in quick forceful spurts, arcing out to spatter on the boards between her feet.

Finally it was over. Jack squinted ruefully at the mess, then staggered upright and backed towards the chair.

Collapsing into it, he closed his eyes and let out a long, contented groan. He felt totally drained, dizzy with exhaustion – and wonderfully, blissfully sated.

Elizabeth felt him leave her, heard his satisfied groan and the heavy sound of his breathing. But for once she felt no desire to go to him. Instead she remained where she was, fingers still gripping the edge of the desk as she stared blankly at the creamy white splatters he’d left behind.

After several minutes his fingers brushed lazily across the back of her thigh.

“Come here t’me, my love,” he murmured drowsily.. “I’ve need of a kiss.”

“Oh? Well I’ve a need to be left alone.”

“Lizzie?”

His obvious bewilderment was too much. She swung round to face him, suddenly furious.

“How dare you!”

Jack flinched, opened his mouth to speak and then closed it again.

“I asked you to stop and you didn’t, you DIDN’T!”

“But…”

“It hurt! It was too much, you went too far and you broke your promise!”

“Elizabeth, I…”

“And the way you acted Jack! Throwing me over the desk like that! I could have been anyone, anyone at all, you wouldn’t have cared who you were with just as long as you got what you wan….”

“Enough!”

His indignant roar shocked her into silence and they glared accusingly at each other.

“Alright,” he shot back, his voice harsh with guilt. “Let’s tackle one complaint at a time, shall we? First off, t’was you who started this. Not me. Second, I broke no promise. The word ‘stop’ did not pass yer lips at any time. If it had I’d have ended it right then. I’d rather’ve spent in me own bleedin’ hand than force ye, an’ you bloody well know it.”

He seized one of her tightly curled fists and yanked her towards him.

“As fer the last – how can ye even think such a thing? I told ye beforehand what that does t’me. But it’s never meant so much as it did just now, wiv you. Never felt it so much, or so powerful. Scared me a bit, t’be truthful. An’ it were all down to you. Why the buggerin’ hell d’you think I spent so fast an’ so bloody hard? Cos it were you, Lizzie, only fer you!”

“I was afraid. You hurt me. You were too big and in too far.”

The kohl darkened lids slid shut, and he groaned.

“Weren’t barely in ye at all. I asked ye Elizabeth! I asked if ye wanted me t’stop an ye didn’t say it, ye bloody didn’t!”

He met her eyes again, his gaze defiant.

“Ye should have said no. Why’d ye let me do it? Never meant t’go that far first time. Was you insisted on opening me breeches, you who wouldn’t listen when I tried t’warn ye. M’only human Elizabeth - what the hell did ye expect of me? I admit I got carried away but ye should have said no. I did ask ye! Ye know damn well I did.”

Scowling, she tried to pull free of his unyielding grasp.

“Elizabeth.”

Her name was a low, reproachful whisper.

The fact that he was right made her feel infinitely worse. Now there was a deep sense of shame to contend with, on top of feeling hurt and resentful. Her throat tightened and she swallowed hard, determined not to let him see her cry.

“Let go of me. I need to dress. I need…I need to be alone for a while. Please.”

Silently Jack released her and stood up, hoisting up his breeches with one hand, lips pressed tightly together, his expression carefully blank.

He turned away, walked slowly across the cabin and snatched up a wet cloth. Without looking down he scrubbed it roughly across his genitals, then let it drop to the floor and methodically refastened his breeches.

A moment later he heard the door slam shut behind him with a resounding crash of finality.

“Oh hell, Lizzie,” he whispered, utterly dejected, and rubbed a hand wearily across his face. “Bloody, buggerin’ hell.”