Clutching My Cure

Disclaimer: They belong to others, I'm just borrowing them.


Chapter Twenty-Six

Qui-Gon knelt in front of the window, eyes closed and hands laying loosely in his lap, he was immersed in deep meditation. He’d felt the Darkside currents stir to life only moments ago and knew his apprentice was at the center of them but had forced himself to remain put. Bruck was making decisions on the fly that could endanger his future with the Jedi and it was time for him to face some of the consequences of those choices. If Qui-Gon had sensed any true alarm from his apprentice he would have intervened but things had quickly settled down.

The door opened behind him, the familiar aura of his apprentice filling the room. Conscious of the young man’s every move, the Jedi Master waited until his charge settled on the edge of the bed before speaking. His eyes remained shut as he gently probed the Force currents that swirled wildly around Bruck.

“Are you alright, Padawan?”

A betraying flicker of surprise before the young man sighed in resignation. “You sensed my confrontation with deCrion?”

“It would be difficult to miss that huge of a release of Darkside energies.” Taking a deep cleansing breath, Qui-Gon probed further. “Care to discuss what it was about?”

Bruck’s hesitation was nearly tangible as it hovered in the air between them. “He’s upset that Obi-Wan plans to leave and blamed me for it.”

There was an underlying thread of hurt in the deep voice that prompted Qui-Gon to open his eyes. Shoulders hunched, Bruck stared down at the floor with a look of misery clouding handsome tanned features. “He said something that upset you.”

A reluctant nod. “He told me that Obi-Wan was just using me and would eventually grow bored and return to him.”

Qui-Gon’s own expression grew solemn at the pained admission. He agreed with Xanatos’s observation although he was prepared to be more gentle in sharing his view than the fallen Jedi had been. Current events could only end badly for his apprentice and it would be left to him to pick up the pieces.

“Padawan, I would like for Xanatos and Obi-Wan to come to an understanding myself. It’s painfully obvious that they are madly in love with one another.” The hurt in the young man’s eyes had him on his feet and moving to take a seat beside him on the bed. Resting a comforting hand on a broad shoulder, he continued as compassionately as possible. “I know exactly what hearing that does to you but neither of us can ignore the truth of it. Do you truly want Obi-Wan this way?”

Blue eyes glistened with anguish as Bruck looked away from his mentor’s piercing gaze. “I love him, have always loved him. How can you or anyone expect me to walk away from this opportunity?”

“Bruck what exactly do you see coming of this? You’re training to become a Jedi Knight and know full well the Council’s stand on personal attachments. They will not change the rules for you so where does that leave you and Obi-Wan? Especially in light of the fact that he admittedly and unapologetically practices the Dark arts?”

Qui-Gon felt his heart skip a beat at the look of defiance that crossed the handsome features. “I guess that depends on the Council, doesn’t it?”

Stunned, the Jedi Master grasped his charges’ chin and turned his head so that he could look into Bruck’s eyes. What he saw sent a wave of near desperation crashing through him, the hand tightening its grip.

“Are you telling me that you’re prepared to abandon the Order for him? Throw away years of training to blindly follow a man who can change his mind about your relationship with no warning? A man who is deeply in love with someone else?” Qui-Gon’s words were met with a spark of anger, Bruck jerking his shoulder away and striding across the room. Qui-Gon tapped down the panic he felt hovering on the surface. “You need to stop thinking with your heart on this matter, Padawan.”

Bruck paced in front of the window with agitated steps. “What about, Xanatos? If he came to you today and asked you to stay with him here on Telos, would you be able to turn him down? Would you even want to?”

“That’s a thing of the past.” A hand rubbed weary eyes as Qui-Gon continued. “He and I both are very different people than we were back then. We’ve both grown up and moved on with our lives. A part of me will always love the man he used to be but I’ve accepted the fact that the man I loved is gone. You must face that realization also. This is not the Obi-Wan Kenobi you grew up with and fell in love with back then. That Obi-Wan doesn’t exist anymore.”

He watched as his student halted before the window staring out at the sandy beach visible from the room. It was imperative that Bruck understand that as his mentor, Qui-Gon could not simply stand by and allow him to do something foolish. He had done that with Obi-Wan and now that fateful decision was coming back to bite him in the behind.

“I will always be fond of them both and I wish them the best life has to offer, but my main concern in this entire affair is you.” His voice was gentle as he explained his stand. “I will not remain silent as you throw your life away, whether you thank me for it or not.”

Stubborn silence met his words and left him feeling every one of his years. “Please just keep what I’ve said in mind?”

The door chime sounded before he received a response, Bruck turning to wave it open with obvious eagerness. Obi-Wan stepped inside with a travel bag clutched in one hand, his piercing gaze traveling between the two Jedi as if he sensed the part he’d played in their conversation. Qui-Gon forced himself to his feet and offered the former JedI a warm smile of greeting.

“Obi-Wan. I’m glad you’ve decided to accompany us back to Coruscant. Do you get back there very often?”

The younger man dropped his bag on the floor between his feet before crossing his arms over his chest. “Several times during the course of the year. I have business contacts that require frequent trips there so I finally broke down and bought an apartment about a year ago.”

His gaze shifted toward Bruck, the two men exchanging heated glances that had Qui-Gon shifting in discomfort. He didn’t doubt Obi-Wan’s feelings for Xanatos, but the young man was at the peak of his hormonal age and his passion for Bruck was all too real. One couldn’t put two attractive and healthy men their age in close contact for so long and not expect nature to take over.

“Perhaps you would be willing to meet and talk with me during your stay on the City Planet?” He inserted, drawing Obi-Wan’s attention away from his apprentice once again.

Those wickedly odd eyes studied him closely for some time before Obi-Wan nodded brusquesly. “I can probably work you in. We should go before Xan has a change of heart and withdraws his offer.”

Picking his bag up, he strode out the door with the Jedi close on his heels. They were all tense as they made their way to the personal hanger built onto the property, waiting for Xanatos’s men to spring out with primed weapons to stop them. Obi-Wan was visibly upset when they made it unmolested, no one anywhere near the ship Xanatos was loaning them. He stood eerily still at the foot of the ramp, his gaze searching the surrounding area for some sign of his lover. Qui-Gon exchanged a worried glance with Bruck before striding onto the ship in order to give them some privacy.

Bruck studied the man he loved with mixed emotions. On one hand he was angry that Xanatos was once again bringing hurt to Obi-Wan’s already painful life by refusing to even say goodbye. On the other, he was happy as a Hutt at a free buffet, giddy with the knowledge that Obi-Wan would be coming to Coruscant with him. Guilty that the selfish thoughts had even surfaced, he stepped forward and wrapped Obi-Wan in a loving embrace. Resting his forehead against the other man’s, he sent soothing waves of Force energy in his direction.

“I’m sorry, Obi-Wan.”

A shudder traveled the length of Obi-Wan’s body. “It’s alright, I expected this you know? Xan’s predictable if nothing else.” He turned his head in order to press a kiss of gratitude against Bruck’s cheek before following Qui-Gon onto the vessel.

Bruck’s sigh caught in his throat when his gaze fell on the figure that stood watching from the shadows. The engines roared to life behind him as he waited in watchful silence to see what Xanatos would do. There was a flash of metal as the silver cylinder at the fallen Jedi’s waist swung with the turn of his body, both melting further into the shadowed recess.

Bruck shook his head in disgust as he hurried up the ramp. “Damn stupid, stubborn, bastard.”