Hindsight

Hindsight
Kireania

AN: Ok this chapter was typed in about three and a half hours and is my favorite chapter. I love it and even if there are some mistakes I just love the content. The song that is mentioned in here is “World of Make Believe” by Within Temptation. This has a lot of violence in here and some description of wounds and blood toward the end and at throughout actually.

Again this is in Krys’ POV. I seem to love writing from her view so I think that’s what’s going to happen from now on. I’m going to do first person for this story. So it won’t always be Krys but it will usually always be first person from now on.

Now Peya Luna and Draconian Love I just have to mention that I LOVE YOU GUYS ^.^ you two make my days with your reviews. Especially you Peya because I’m not on Yahoo with you like I am with Draconian so getting your good reviews on a constant chapter basis means a lot. Thank you.

Chapter Four:
Ritual Run Away

Usually staying in my room and doing nothing doesn’t bother me. I’ve had tons of practice at it. But tonight it’s different. This isn’t my room. It’s far larger than my room, I have just been bathed for eight hours straight, I am in extremely fancy yet revealing clothing and I can hear a lot of people shuffling about. No one is coming near my room but my hearing picks up their footsteps from down the hall.

I pace the room and look at every detail, my shyness and fear at being yelled at having already dissipated. I’m curious, that has always been my greatest downfall and my greatest saving grace. If it wasn’t for my curiosity I would have never met Red. If it wasn’t for my curiosity I would have never figured out the computer or that I could sing. There are many things that it has gotten me in trouble for though.

One night I heard some weird noises at the bottom of my steps and I was curious so I went to investigate…it turned out that my sister had invited a secret guest over without our parents’ permission. My sister flailed into me later that night and just told mother that I fell down the steps in the morning. I said nothing. Similar incidents happened all through out, all ending in the same way. So I have learned to reign in most of my nosiness. But in this room alone and unwatched I let it go unchecked.

I finish with the room and head to check out the window. Yea I could easily get my entire body up there but I want to be able to see it without straining my still bruised stomach. I bring the vanity’s chair over and position it so that when I step up I can look out and look down. I smile widely. The ground is actually really close so I can smell the clean grass and the bushes; it’s a smell I don’t get often except after heavy rain when it is its most pungent. I love it.

I look out and I gasp. There are lights out in the distance that I have never seen before. I know I am sheltered greatly but I don’t even know where I live. I don’t know the city, the town, the state, anything. My breath is taken away when I see those lights; I can just imagine that somewhere in that world is my Red and that he’s waiting for me to get on my computer so he can once again try to convince to break out.

I doubt I ever will break out. I’m much too scared.

I leave the window open, wanting the smell of the grass to linger, and get down from the chair and put it back so that it does not look out of place. I wander around the room again my hand just gracing the surfaces as I try to entertain myself but I am bored. I hum a tune that I made up a long time ago. I don’t know if people listen to music similar to my tune or what, I’m not allowed to listen to the radio, but I wrote this song during a particularly loud rain storm that left pictures of different creatures and places in my head. Unicorns, dragons, fireflies, wizards, caves, shores, a village, and I am queen of it all. It was my world of make believe. That’s actually what I call the song too.

Red actually has a copy of me singing the song. My curiosity got the best of me one day and during that night, since my sister was gone away on a trip; I snuck down to her room and used her computer. Her computer is a lot more up to than mine is. Her computer has music software and she even has, I think I’ve heard her call it a flash drive, but it stores things on it you don’t want on the main computer. Well I stole that for a while and it took a little while but I used her program to create my song and I stored it on the drive.

The vocal part had been hard because I had to do that in my room. I had to get my sister’s recorder and record myself singing my song without the music in the background. I found out that if I close my eyes and just sing I hear the music and it all works out but it’s really hard because I was trying to make sure that no one in my family found me out during this whole process. It took me Dali’s entire trip to create and finish the song.

It’s even harder to do this stuff when you’ve never used a program before but I managed and Red loved it. He said my voice was amazing. I felt like flying at that compliment. That was the closest we’ve ever been to talking but that’s ok because the song says more than what words can. I wonder if he still listens to that song of me singing. When he finished and completed the download on his side I erased everything that I had just worked on, making sure there were no traces of my song on the flash drive or the main drive. I told Red goodnight and that I’d be back on my normal computer the next day and then I deleted everything that dealt with the conversation and snuck back up to my room.

My courage had last me the entire time during my sister’s absence but that’s because I had a goal that was worth it. I wanted Red to hear me sing. I wanted his opinion.

Now as I’m laying on my back on the large bed I’m softly singing the words to my song my eyes half open as I try to imagine what Red would look like if I actually sang for him in person. How would he react to me? Would he smile? Would he try to kiss me? He’s already admitted to me that he’s pretty damn sure he’s falling head over heels in love with me, those being his exact words. I’m not sure how I would react to his affections. I don’t think I’ve ever had anyone give me any. I mean I know a kiss but that’s out of obligation not affection, Red is complete affection.

My heart aches. What if he thinks I’m not worth the trouble? What if I take to long to open up? What if I just don’t appeal to him after a time? What if he doesn’t appeal to me?

I sit up and shake my head at my last thought. I might not know much about what’s attractive and how to react but I know that I won’t care what he looks like. If I ever meet him I’ll see him for who he is and that’s the one that loved me. I doubt I’ll meet him though. My family and soon to be husband will never allow it. I don’t even think I’ll be allowed my computer time much longer, Zenir doesn’t like that I have it right now.

I put my head in my hands, I want to cry but I hold it back, I can’t cry and make my family suspect something. They are all human but they all know enough magic to read my mind easily enough. I have learned how to block my mind from the smaller attacks but if they really bear down I can’t block them without it being obvious that I’m hiding something. And if I’m hiding something and they find out then it just gets that much worse.

I might not be human any longer because of their experiments but that doesn’t make me any stronger than they are. Hell they’re definitely stronger that’s obvious. Pushing my thoughts away I stand up and pace. There’s no use in getting upset, I can’t change anything. I’m stuck here and I’m going to be stuck here for the rest of my life.

I go by the door and yet again my curiosity peaks. I crack it open barely enough to see out of but I can just see down the hall. There’s no one there, they’ve all cleared out. I sigh and am about to close the door when a smell hits me and I freeze. I know this smell and I feel my body reacting. My body starts to curl and cringe. I’m hungry. But I’m not reacting to the smell of food. My food is never warm enough to have this strong of a smell. This smell is blood, fresh blood.

I haven’t had to smell anyone’s blood but my own in years. What in the world is going on? I open my door even more, it makes no sound and as soon as I can slip between the crack, I slide out and close it. I need to find where this blood is coming from because whoever is bleeding is bleeding a copious amount.

I am silently as I travel through the shadows down the hall. My eyes easily see every movement, every mouse that scurries through my home I note and then ignore. The mice are not the ones that are bleeding; I smell human blood not animal blood. I stop dead in my tracks as a few men pass by and enter a room not too far ahead. As they open the door the smell of blood gets even stronger so I know that the source is in there.

I am about ready to turn around. If those guys are in there then the person must be ok…they’ll help whoever is bleeding. The blood will go away and everything will be just fine. But then I hear a sound that I know all too well, a whimper of pain and a thud of a body hitting the ground. It takes a few moments after that for the new wave to wash over me but I’m almost salivating now, there is even fresher blood and this one is younger and cleaner. My stomach clenches but my mind is in denial.

My feet are moving before I realize it and the next thing I know I’m staring between the open crack of the doors. The entire group from earlier is in there, those last few must have been the ones to round up any one that was lingering about. I easily pick out my family; they are all dressed up nicely, as is Zenir. I want to see more of the room but my eyes find what my nose has been following. A pool of blood is in the center of the room. I see two bodies laying there and yet no one is offering any help, in fact everyone seems to be urging someone else on. I move my eyes and barely hold back my gasp.

The old hag from earlier is standing behind one of the girls that had bathed me earlier with a knife at the girls neck. Without hesitation the hag slits the young girl’s neck and the girl whines but does nothing else but fall forward. I look at the other bodies and yes they are the other girls that bathed me as well. WHAT THE HELL?!?! I back up from the door my hand over my mouth to keep any sound from escaping. I run back to my room barely remembering to keep to the shadows as my mind is filled with those girls’ lifeless bodies and that large pool of blood.

I can’t deny that the blood smells delicious but that site makes me nauseous. How can they just stand there and be killed? Why are they even being killed?

I can’t stay here. I have to do something…I have to…I have to…

I look at the window and an idea that had only briefly popped into my mind earlier this very night came back. Before I had been too terrified to leave; now I was too terrified to stay. I don’t know how long I have until they will come for me so I have to act fast.

I can’t think about this because I know I’ll lose my nerve so I hike up my skirt tuck it into the top so that it doesn’t get caught. I go to my window and easily lift myself up on the ledge before pushing the window open to the side the entire way. The ground is only about two stories away. Not much of a jump for me. I take a breath and I jump and I land without a single sound. My stomach is not happy those muscles not yet ready for such harsh activities but I can’t be bothered to worry about that. I have to get out of here.

I start running. My legs carry me towards the lights, towards the city that I have never even known was there. I seriously hope that I am doing the right thing. I can’t imagine this being anything other than the right thing. They raised me not to defy, they raised me to obey, they raised me to let them do whatever they want to me, but they never said anything about me not thinking for myself.

The grass below my feet is wet and I can feel it getting caught between my toes. I wasn’t given any shoes after my bathes. My feet are going to hurt later but there is no other choice. I want to scream in agony, in pain, in despair, in betrayal, in fear, in relief, and surprisingly enough even in a bit of excitement, but I don’t. Any noise at all could tip anything that I’m gone. I don’t know if mother has anything out watching her land.

I can tell when I get to the edge of my parents’ land. I can no longer feel their magic, their hold. But just as I cross the barrier a noise stops me. I hear a howl. They’ve sent werewolves out after me, oh shit. I turn and start running again. Now I’m running for my life. I don’t know if they have orders to bring me back or not but I’ve met one werewolf before and it was not a pleasant meeting, I do not want to repeat it.

My breathing is fast and shallow, I can’t get enough air into my lungs, my legs are cramping having never ran this amount before but I force them to go on, my heart is pounding fear and exhaustion are coursing through me. I can’t stop nor can I slow down those wolves are fast I can hear them catching up to me even though I have at least a good fifteen minute head start.

My feet are no longer on grass and I am suddenly in the city. I’m running on pavement and there is glass and other sharp objects that my feet come in contact with but I barely feel them, I’m much too scared to feel anything other than fear right now. Now people are screaming and I know the wolves are right behind me. I hear their paws hit the ground. No they can’t be this close, not this fast. My mind wants to whine at how unfair this all is but I don’t have the energy.

I see what I assume is a car from all the pop up on the internet I’ve come across and I think that maybe I can confuse them and jump up on one and lose them on the other side. I jump but I’m slowing down from fatigue, and one of them catches me mid jump sending me flying into a hard pane of glass that shatters. I bounce from that and hit another car on the top metal part this car is luckily in park unlike the last car and I just roll to the ground and fall onto my back and black out.

I don’t wake back up right away and I can tell this because when I do wake up there is someone beside me. It’s a young man and he’s firing something at the wolves that actually hurts them. That terrifies me. What could this guy have that could hurt werewolves? He looks human so I’m scared. I sit up and just stare at him, not wanting to piss him off.

I don’t really trust it when he says he won’t hurt me but he is firing at the werewolves and not me and it’s not like he’s part of my family. For right now he’s all I got I’ll lose him later, better safe then sorry. I’ll sneak away next time he starts to shoot.

At least I was going to do that but out of no where one of those wolves came down on us and lunged at me. I pushed myself up using my arms and back peddled out of its ranged before it could snap its jaws at me. It tried again but the strange guy fired a few more of those magic things and the wolf was down. The guy was still for just a moment as if he was shocked at something but then he snapped out of it and came over and grabbed my arm.

Oh shit, I’ve pissed him off. He’s gonna kill me. My mind races. I don’t know what I did to piss him off but I assume I deserve it. I always deserve my punishments. I stare at him in fear as I follow his fast pace away from the rest of the wolves. They’re sniffing and trying to figure out what had just happened to their pack mates. I doubt they’ll be at it long but I’m not sure, I’m not an expert at werewolves or anything.

He pulls me into a small area and let’s go of me. And then proceeds to pull out something from his pocket and fiddle with a few things before it’s up to his ear and he’s waiting. I have to think about what he’s doing. I hate being so damn isolated about things. When I hear him talking I realize it’s a phone. Then I hear him say his name and then I hear the name RED. Now while I’m sure there are plenty of people with those names I am highly doubtful that there are many that are friends like the two I know are.

If he is the same John Myers I know then he will know the Proof. If he doesn’t then I was mistaken and I will sneak off. But if this is him then I’m not sure what I’d do. I listen in on the conversation but very little of it makes sense to me so I tune it out and try to listen for the wolves to make sure they aren’t sneaking up on us. The city smells are so overwhelming to me right now that I doubt my nose will be any help unless there’s blood around. And the only blood I smell is my blood from my numerous injuries from hitting the car with that much force.

Finally John is off the phone and I stare at him and I ask him, “Proof?”

He stares at me like he doesn’t know what I’m asking him. So maybe I was wrong but I give him a moment and sure enough a moment later I see his eyes widen and I see him stand up straighter.

He says my name but I just shake my head and once again ask him, “Proof?”

I can’t risk this. I need to know that I am safe. I need to know that this John Myers is the same one that let me talk to Red yesterday. I need to know that this John Myers is the same one that Red trusts with our secret. I need to know that this is the one that I can trust.

He nods and rambles out the proof line and then more rambling but he says it. It is him. I relax slightly. I don’t have to sneak away from him. I can trust him. He is a friend. I tilt my head back and look to the sky and then I cover my eyes. I fight back tears of relief. I fight back a scream of nothing but the word “Finally” I fight back everything. Now is not the time for anything.

I look back down and I see concern in his eyes and I smile a little. “Well now Red can no longer say he didn’t save me.” Just as I say that I hear a noise I should have noticed earlier but I my relief had distracted me. The wolves have found us. Our scent is strong. Damn. He grabs my arm again we head back out into the city. I don’t know what he’s trying but I’m running right next to him, trusting his judgment as a friend. Red trusts him, I trust him.

People scream again as the wolves follow us and I look back and suddenly wish I hadn’t. They are right there, barely a few steps behind. Only the fact that they aren’t meant to maneuver in this type of environment is keeping them from overtaking us. We take turn after turn trying to them but we can’t. It’s useless; with us in sight and our smell so strong it’s pointless.

Suddenly out of nowhere his phone rang. I jump and stumble but he pulls me up and I quickly recover. He tries to ignore the phone but the person calls again and this time he answers the phone. I don’t know why but I want to take the damn thing and throw it at the wolves and show him that phones aren’t really good at a time like this. But suddenly I see his face change. What ever he’s being told on the phone must be good or at least better news.

“Well help is actually closer than I expected.” He’s panting between the words. We are both exhausted and panting, him more so than I am. I think my sessions have better prepared me.

I don’t even pretend to know what he’s talking about so I just shake my head at him. “No talking just running.”

I can’t afford wasting energy on talking and I doubt he can either so he shuts up. One of the wolves let out a blood curling howl and I shiver and continue to push people out of my way so I can keep moving. I don’t know where he’s leading me but if I can guess I’d say it’s to that big park that I see getting closer.

Why we are going there I have no idea. It looks like it would be a death trap for us. There’s no place for us to hide from the wolves. There’s everywhere for them to ambush us from. They can surround us there. They can scent us out much easier. I don’t know why we are even heading there. There has to be something about this park that is different that I don’t know. Is it magical? Is there something about it that werewolves can’t enter? I don’t know but hell I hope so. Any courage that I’ve had since I started this run is waning fast. I’m starting to want to go home.

We dash across an extremely busy street I’m shocked I didn’t get hit by a car again, but one of the wolves did. I hear it yelp in pain but I know it’s not dead. These things are awful to kill. The car is probably totaled though. I don’t turn around to check. I’m no longer next to John like I had t be on the street, I’m behind him. I have no clue where we’re going so I follow closely. I know I can move faster than him but he is my guide.

When he stops I am shocked. We have been running this entire time and all of a sudden he’s just stopped. There is a road right next to us along with a pretty deep pond, it’s at least 16 ft deep while its 30 ft wide. Trees are at the back of us so we’re going to see the wolves emerge. Are we really going to fight?

Uh no way! Not me! I don’t fight. I’m effin terrified right now so I’m backing up away from John and that has to be the worst mistake I’ve ever made. I don’t notice that one of the wolves, the one that got hit by the car I think, traveled around the park by the road was behind me. John noticed right before I did. He tried to call out but it was too late. The wolf leapt at me and it grabbed me. I struggled and we ended up falling back into the pond.

Now I can’t swim it’s why I didn’t go to deep into the cave pool. I’ve never been taught, now have I been exposed to anything involving water other than drinking or bathing. The cold shocks my body into motionlessness for a moment but then I feel the claw digging into my skin and I snap out of it. I start to struggle. I’m scared for my life now. I can’t swim and I’m fighting against an obviously stronger creature that can swim, oh hell I’m screwed.

I wiggle back and forth, my skin is being literally shredded beneath the claws I can see the blood flowing from my arms and it fills the water. I throw my head back it hits the creature’s nose. I am released and I move forward carelessly. I somehow turn my body and see that the werewolf is in a more “were” form now. It looks like it could stand on hind legs and walk like humans and other two leggers do. It must have changed right before it grabbed onto me.

It glares at me and the lunges and I scream and try to back away uselessly. Once again its claws are in my skin. The pain is awful. And suddenly it’s not just the pain from being shredded that makes me scream. My lungs are burning, my eyes are burning, my head aches, and my arm has just been snapped. Those strong aggressive arms are around me and squeeze tightly, I can’t help but scream what little air I have left out and I feel my ribs crack.

My mind is starting to go fuzzy when I hear a splash. I tilt my head and I see a hulking figure swimming towards me and the werewolf. I can barely make out that it’s not another werewolf, but I don’t know what it is. My mind is going black fast. But I can tell that whatever it is, is bright red.

The new one pulls the Werewolf off of me and I just hang there, unable to do anything. I see the wolf being hit and sent flying. The new one comes over to me and grabs me. I want to say no, but my mind is so close to blacking out that I’m shocked that I’m even still lucid. This close I can sorta see the face but my vision is still extremely blurry from having no air. It holds me gently and starts to swim up. Within moments I’m no longer in water but I’m being laid on the ground and there are people leaning over me.

I react to none of them as my lungs try to breath but the pain from my ribs laces through me every time I inhale. I cough and that really hurts. Something blue comes close and I whine in fear but I hear John’s voice.

“It’s ok. That’s Blue. He’s not going to hurt you. He’s going to help heal you. Don’t be afraid.”

I hear his words but I don’t understand half of them but I know his voice. If he’s here then I’m safe. Trust him, trust Red.

I cough again but this time water comes up and I have to roll over but who ever helps me roll over rolls me over on my broken arm so I have even more pain course through me. I don’t usually cry out in pain but right now everything is just so off, so different that I can’t control myself.

I cough again and more water comes out but this time I taste blood too. I hurt. I hurt so much. I feel so raw right now that all I want to do is sleep. So that’s what I do.

I lay myself back to the ground and even though I have voices yelling at me I close my eyes and fall asleep. I fall into a black world where there is no pain. A black world where I can just float and heal.

AN: ok so that’s Chapter 4 what do you all think? Read and Review please. ^^
Oh and once I get far enough into this I’m going to go back through and do some editing, just grammatical so I’m going to be my own Beta lol.

Ja ne
Kireania