A Little Gift from ENCOM

Chapter 4: Sundown

 

 

 

Dillinger had to go on a business trip for a week. And he had selected Judith to be his substitute for the duration of his absence, handing over all the responsibility to her, full of trust and certainty.

Judith was more than willing to take on this task. Not least because she really wanted to help him with all the work, felt like having to take a little from the burden of this post off of his shoulders.

She had always thought that he was overworked and needed some kind of a substitute or an assistant in general. And with being his substitute for this week she would do everything possible that the work would not pill up until he came back.

 

 

It was the evening before Dillinger’s departure.

He just had called her in his office to give her the last few instructions. He stood behind his huge desk; the skyline and the sundown in his back. Without wasting a second he began to explain the functions of his desk computer. Judith had always been curios about how it was working, and so she was listening to him, watching him, with great interest.

It was a shiny, heavy, room-dominating, black, octagonal desk, the area of the screen – taking up about a third of the whole desk –  slightly lifted for a better sight, even more lift-able to the user’s liking.

He booted the computer and immediately it got strewn with blue and white glowing windows and signs and types. Keeping his upright position he began to operate and to explain. His hands were gliding and whirring and tapping over the blank surface, the keyboard and the touch screen as if he was playing a sonata on some kind of a futuristic instrument.

Judith noticed, smiling unseen, that he seemed to show more extroversion and passion by operating his computer than in any other situation. But she liked watching him. Enjoyed watching him.

Judith’s wide range of skills also included a quick uptake as well as a keen memory and the ability to multi-task. And therefore she took the liberty to enjoy Dillinger’s sight surreptitiously from time to time while her brain was automatically absorbing and processing the information she got from him.

What a treat for the eyes he was … So close to her now, so vivid, so full of motion, so stunningly gorgeous.

The exquisite fabric of his pants tightening around his buttocks as he was bending over the desk… The shiny black silk of his vest stretching over his slender back…The fine fluff of hair on his sinewy forearms, immersed with backlight from the sundown, suggesting a fine, bright film along the outline of his skin…

She held her arms crossed behind her back, her hands nearly twitching in urge to touch. It was torture. Pure, sweet torture…

Her stealthy gaze was following the wiry tendons of his long, lean neck, diving into his shiny dark hair, wandering along his sideburns down to the well trimmed stubble on his cheeks, on his jawline and his upper lips, noticing some solitary silver stubbles scattered here and there.

She was smiling enraptured.

Darek might was perfect. But Ed was beautiful…

And his scent… She had to hold back hard from closing her eyes, bowing over to him and just breathing it in, that fresh, decent, sweet and spicy fragrance.

She didn’t know if it was because of the sundown, flooding the room and lighten Dillinger’s face with a soft orange glow, making his features appear warm and alluring, why she suddenly felt so high-spirited, felt like something had to happen, just something.

All she knew was that letting this beautiful sundown just pass without giving into its magic, seemed like a waste.

 

She was now daringly close to him, even bending over to him a little, while he still was continuing his instructions. And as he finished explaining and straightened up again, his face was only half an arm length away from hers.

He was looking into her face, just one blink too long for common eye contact. And she returned his gaze, held it, breathless, moveless, didn’t dare to even blink, fearing he could break that sweet, exciting ban.

And there was something in his eyes, something slowly revealing, something soft. Something like surrender.

He moved a little closer, only a tad, leaning forward to her just an inch, then he froze, hesitant somehow, as if unsure. And she brought her face nearer to his, encouragingly. And he moved again. Then she closed her eyes for his lips were touching hers.

What a warm, soft, sweet touch…

She heard his breath, felt his breath, and for this short little moment of sharing closeness for the first time it was the most beautiful thing she has ever felt.

A brief withdraw by him, a short glance at her, then he kissed her again. His tongue met hers for a single stroke, as if gingerly tasting, and then for another one, and another, causing sweet electricity arising in her belly, flashing down her lap and up to her chest, reaching her heart with a blaze of rapture. And suddenly the sunlight was nothing compared to the brightness and warmth she felt while kissing him.

His hand caressed her cheek, glided along her neck to her shoulder, staying there, grabbing her gently.

And her hand reached his chest, slightly brushing the silky clothe, wandering over to the folds of his rolled up shirt sleeve, sliding further to his forearm, feeling fine fluff tickling under her fingertips.

 

And then the moment was gone. It seemed to fade with the sun finally diving down the horizon, leaving dim twilight behind, leaving Ed’s face cold and grey again. He turned away from her, hastily closing all the open windows on his computer.

“That’s… erm… all you need to know,” he said, dryly. “If you have any further questions you can call me while I’m away. You can finish work now.”

Was he throwing her out of his office?

In a last attempt to bring back that sweet moment Judith asked him: “Would you like to go out for a drink afterwards?” And she sweetened her words with a warm smile and an unspoken invitation underneath.

Ed looked at her for the duration of three, four heartbeats as if thinking about her offer.

“No", he finally said, shaking his head, looking away from her, looking down at his desk, operating some functions. Or pretending to…

“I have things to do. And tomorrow I have to get up early.” His tone remained sterile, and not the smallest smile was referring to the intimacy and tenderness they just had shared.

“Okay…” She headed for the door. But as she reached it she turned to him again.

“Are you rejecting me?”

Ed seemed to be slightly puzzled by her straightness.

“No, I’m not”, he said. “But I really have to work now.”  His attention was focusing on his computer again.

 

Judith closed the door behind her.

She didn’t know if his dry confirm was already more than she could have wished for, and therefore should have been happy. Or if she should cry over his coldness...

 

 

 

It was Monday, late evening. Judith was sitting in Ed’s office looking at the desk computer, darkness around her, her face only lit by the light coming from the touch screen.

She had finished work for today and actually was free to go home. But she was lost in thought.  Ed had gave her his personal password, had entrusted her with the access to every function and every file on his computer.

Was it just an expression of trust?  Was it a test for her to see if she would snoop around? Or was he intending her to snoop around? Wanting her to read in his computer like in an open book instead of letting her read in his heart which he held locked? Wanting her to find out about things he wasn’t able to talk about face to face…?

Or was she just scratching her mind in vain? For a talented programmer like Ed would of course manage to lock files he didn’t want to share, while still be able to give his password to someone else.

She didn’t know. But one thing was for sure: No matter what his intention might was to entrust her with the insight to his computer, she would never snoop around. Would never open or try to open files which weren’t required for her working process.

But yet she couldn’t get rid of the thought – the stirring, tempting, sizzling thought –   if there might was a file hidden somewhere in the depths of the computer’s data base which called “Darek”…

 

 

 

As this week was passing, Judith’s workmates kept telling her, on and on, how relaxing it was with Dillinger being away, with having her as their boss. But she wasn’t going into this talking behind his back. On the contrary; she backed him up. Not somehow emotional, risking to let leak out any hint that she had feelings for him, but neutral, like the professional worker she was.

If he really deserved her support, she didn’t know, for he seemed to do everything possible to increase the dislike people had for him. All she knew was that Ed was a lonely man. No matter if it was his own fault or not; she cared about it.

 

 

 

* * * * * *

 

 

 

Ed was back. It was Monday and he had overtaken his office again.

 

The hopes Judith had, that he might return with a better mood, were slowly but gradually fading. He seemed to be colder than ever. No word of thank or appreciation for her, truly, outstanding work during his absence. Just one another point on her Grid Access credit. 

Although she didn’t care much about awards for achievements at work – and she was well aware that Ed wasn’t a man of great praising speeches – she would have appreciated it to hear at least some nice personal words from him. But there was nothing. Not even a word about their relationship. If there was one at all…  

 

 

Much later that day. Almost evening.

 

Judith had some work to discuss with Ed so she was heading for his office.

“Something troubling you?” She asked in a warm gesture of caring as she closed the door behind her.

He was indeed brooding heavily over something very unpleasant. Faint but noticeable nuances in his face where telling her so. Either was she the only one with whom he shared his mood or she was the only one who could actually read his face. Fact was that he only seemed to show frailty when he was alone with her.

If that was a burden or a gift she was about to figure out…

“Nothing I can’t handle,” was the short, dry answer he fobbed her off with as he turned to the window, looking down to the city, repellently.

“Sure?” she tried it again, a gentle tone in her voice, walking towards him. “I can offer you some time if you want to talk about it.”

He turned his face to her, his brows furrowed. “Do you really want me to start a women’s talk? About emotions and stuff? Are you kiddin’ me?” A brief, dry, sarcastic smile was twitching his lips for a second.

That was too much.

Judith had always been keeping calm, keeping her composure, remaining tolerant and understandable. But that was rather much an insult. And now that they had shared the intimacy of a kiss, they could share just as well the intimacy of a heated argument, in her opinion.

“What is actually your problem?” she began, her voice composed, but yet raised and insistent. “Why do you always seem to take your anger out on me? Just tell me and we can get over it!”

He was looking out of the window again, answering her in a low, emotionless tone: “Just insert my former statement here.”

She gasped.

Almost breathless from anger she spoke: “Tell me, honestly: Do you have feelings for me at all?”

“I do”, he admitted. But he could have said “I don’t” instead, the tone of his voice wouldn’t have changed much.

“Then why don’t you show me?”

“I’m just not the emotional kind of guy. Isn’t that obvious by now?”

“That doesn’t mean that you have to be an asshole instead!” she shouted and left his office, regretting her childish temper in the same moment she slammed the door behind her.

That was unprofessional. Maybe she even had to carry the consequences for talking to him like this. After all he was her superior.

 

But he was about to break her heart.

And a heart in danger of being broken was not caring much about good manners, about rationality or responsibility. It was a weak, blinded little creature snapping around in trying to defense its life.

 

 

 

 

There where no consequences…

 

There was just one thing happening after their argument. Three days later. Another point on her Grid Access Account…

As she was looking at her Memo Pad she saw her credit full, blinking, ready to take her to the Grid once more for another tryst with Darek.

She could have thrown that thing away, shattering it right there on the floor, smashing it to pieces.

 

What was he thinking? That he could right the wrongs with offering her cyber sex?

That whole issue had now grown to rather perverted dimensions …

 

She had not been entirely sure yet if Ed really had created Darek for her. Until that day.

That couldn’t be just coincidence. It was the only explanation for earning herself yet another Grid Point, for she had already gained one for being his substitute, only days ago. And she hasn’t done something that remarkable in the meantime that it would have justified deserving such a reward again in such a short time.

Did Ed really think she was not clever enough to make this connection? Or was he aware that she might put one and one together, but just didn’t care? 

That was either pathetic or completely arrogant…

 

Okay then, Ed! She was thinking to herself, defiant, bitter-hearted, grabbing her Memo Pad as if wanting to strangle it.

If you want me to have sex with Darek then I will have sex with Darek! I’m going to fuck him till his bytes fall apart! Your fault to be not in his place!

 

 

 

* * * * * *

 

 

 

 

He always knew just right what she wanted.

Darek.

This time he was lying on the bed, writhing there, weakly, as if craving for her touch in debilitating desire, his suit opened at its front, his legs spread wide.

She sat on his lap, letting him remove her suit, nestling her yearning flesh on his hot hardness, taking him in, moving him to her liking, using him the way she felt like. She let him grab her backside, but it was she who was leading, who was indicating the rhythm.

And he remained hard and willing, bearing her every shove, her every grasp, her every command.

Until she was fed up.

 

Judith was resting, sitting on the edge of the bed, her stare million miles away, somewhere in the Grid landscape.

“Seems you’re somehow …enraged, Judith. Seems you needed to let off steam…” Darek was whispering on her neck, kneeing behind her. And she felt his lips stretching to a grin as he was kissing her.

“How attentive you are, Darek…” Judith replied, a little sarcastically.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Darek offered her, tenderly, interested. And Judith’s heart was fluttering for the flash of one brief little moment. To hear this voice, Ed’s voice, speaking such caring words in a warm breath on her shoulder, was like a dream came true. For an instant she imagined it was him.

And then she began to tell Darek about Ed. It was awkward, it was strange, it was completely out of place. But it was a release.

As she had finished, Darek commented, smirking: “Well, Judith… Looks like he has his own will, and doesn’t hold back to show it. And I thought you liked that…”

Judith sighed. “You know nothing about the feelings of us humans, do you?”

“No. They just don’t seem logical to me…”

“Let me tell you, Darek: Love is somehow like a virus. It invades your body, your whole system, overtakes every part of it, every cell. It makes you high with fever, but it also hurts you, wounds you, makes you sick and weak.”

“I have quite an idea of it…”

His hands, just finished massaging her tensed shoulders, were gliding now under her arms, reaching her breasts, caressing them while breathing hot sighs in her ear as if getting aroused by touching her.

“He doesn’t treat you right, Judith.” His hands worked there way down to her crotch, parting her legs, letting the fingers of both of his hands slip between them in the same moment his tongue slipped into the windings of her ear.

“You deserve better…”

Judith leant back her head, receiving his kisses on her throat, while his ten fingers were doing magic.

 

 

 

 

 

 

A week later, evening.

It was nearly seven o’ clock. Judith and Ed were the last ones leaving their department.

Without talking Ed was walking along the dim-lit corridor, Judith just half a step behind him.

 

He had been very quiet in the last few days. Not rude or mean, but neither he had been somehow warm or emotional. Just dry, sober, remote and distant, not picking up again their argument. Not doing or saying anything about the state of their relationship.

And Judith herself was somehow caught in a phase of sobriety, of suppressing every emotion at the moment. For the work was currently very hard and stressful and she just had no energy left to spend it on disputing or discussing with Ed, or to trying to get through to him to find out where she was at with him. Besides this she just felt that it was his turn now. And she wouldn’t lift a finger in this case unless he gave her any kind of a signal.

 

The elevator door opened and they were stepping in. Ed pressed the button. Forty-five floors to go…

He was not speaking a word. It could have been a stranger standing next to her.

She was watching the display with the numbers of the floors counting down. Forty-one… forty… thirty-nine… Taking her completely by surprise, he suddenly touched her cheek, forcing her face gently to turn to him. Then he kissed her, very soft and tender, but reserved somehow.

The palms of his hands on her upper arms he looked at her then and spoke to her low, almost whispering, as if afraid anyone could hear him –  but maybe just afraid of hearing himself: “I won’t ever talk about emotions, Judith. That’s nothing personal, nothing against you. But please understand it. Please accept it.”

Captured by his gentleness suddenly revealing, captured by his soft touch, his closeness, his deep glance, she wasn’t able to do anything else than to agree. There was something tender and honest and straight in his behavior she couldn’t deny.

And her heart, that silly, weak little thing, began to thump and to rejoice, despite the decision her mind had made, to try to restrain her feelings for Ed.

But yet she wasn’t a teen girl of thirteen years anymore who let herself distract by some sweet whispering and caressing, yet she had pride and self-worth. And there were things even a kiss could not recompense.

So she spoke to him, friendly and warm, but insistent: “Okay, Ed. I accept it. But could you do just one thing for me in return?”

His whole body seemed to tense, his face freezing.

“Don’t speak to me like this again… like you were in your office. And I’m not talking about emotions right now, I’m talking about respect.”

Ed was looking at her motionless for a few seconds, seeming to think about if he should take this as an order.

All Judith got in the end was a quick, cramped nod. But for her it was enough. She was well aware that he wasn’t someone who would ever fall on his knees to apologize. 

He seemed to prefer offering virtual sex toys for reconciliation…

 

 

The elevator came to a stop and they where stepping out into the entrance hall. The security man behind his reception desk was greeting them friendly as they were passing by and heading for the wide glass front door.

Fresh night air and the sounds of the city were welcoming them as they were leaving the ENCOM tower.

Ed was about to take the metro while she was heading for the bus station. And at the point where their ways were separating Judith held him up: “Ed. There’s something I wanted to ask you.”

Again he seemed to freeze, every expression on his face turning to stone, his lips pressed together, his brows furrowed, but his eyes slightly widened. His whole body seemed to tense as if crying out a silent warning. Or a silent pleading?

“All these Grid Points…” Judith began, innocently. “Do you really think I deserve that much of them?”

“Yes I think so!” he replied in one breath, in one word even, his voice a little husky. “Good night, Judith.” And he turned away from her.