More Than Life
4
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“That’s what you’re wearing?”
Tess looked down, trying to figure out what was wrong with her
outfit. She was wearing a pair of
low-slung drawstring sweats and a tank-top over a sports bra.
working out.” Tess picked up her gym
bag, and looked at Cora. “Is there
something wrong with wearing this?”
“Not if you’re on your own, but we know how rarely that happens these days.”
Tess grimaced. Cora had a
point. Sands had been shadowing her
movements for the past three weeks. He’d
never approached her – she hadn’t even talked to him since her last meeting
with Strauss – but she could feel his eyes on her.
little house in Culíacan . . . other than the fact that his spooking in the
background was on a whole new scale now and that his eyes burned her, of
course. Sometimes she swore he was just
doing his job, but at other times she swore he was undressing her with his
eyes.
I doknowknow why he would want
to. It’s not like
he hasn’t already seen it all.spanspan>The
thought almost made her sick with nerves.
She’d never been one for casual sex or one-night stands.
all. Not that she’d been a virgin – her
two-hour marriage had taken care of that little detail – but she wasn’t exactly
experienced either. Which was why, as much
as she tried to forget that night, she couldn’t quite make it disappear.
exhaustion would help her get it out of her head.
“I’ll be fine. For some reason,
my friend is giving me a wide berth. He
might sit around in his car and stare at me, but that’s as far as things
go.” Tess slung on a zippered
sweatshirt, and grabbed her keys. “I
should be back in two hours or so. If
I’m not, I’ve got my cell phone.
tell Carlos that I don’t want him online all afternoon.
need to hear it again.” With that final
admonition, Tess was out the door and jogging to her car, gym bag bouncing on
her back.
Why don’t I park the car in the
garage? she wondered as she searched for her car
key. Finding it, Tess unlocked the car door and practically flung herself
inside. It was cold out. She put the key in
the ignition, then reached to fasten her
seatbelt. She glanced in the rear-view
mirror as she did so, and felt her heart stop for a moment.
Sands grinned irritatingly.
“Careless chica. What if I had
been up to no good?”
What do you mean, ‘What if?’
cautiously replied, not at all certain that she wasn’t in trouble now.
Sands leaned forward in the backseat, intruding on her personal
space. Tess fought the urge to move
away, but not successfully enough for him to not notice.
ear.
“Yes,” she whispered, unsure of what he was doing.
“Good.” He sat back.
She twisted around in her seat and stared at him.
“The gym?” He was looking at her,
his eyebrows raised expectantly. “I
thought you were eager to go get your groove on.”
For the first time she noticed that he was dressed in a pair of worn
jeans and a t-shirt. He had something in
mind. “You make is sound like I’m
jazzercising.”
“What? You’re not up for getting
all hot and sweaty and out of breath with me?
I’ve always compared it to a
dance.” Tess blanched and reached for
the handle of the door. Sands surged
forward and grabbed her wrist. “Relax.
yourself.”
“Right.” Mentally, Tess smacked
her forehead, thinking that sheded ded to grow a backbone where this man was
concerned. Outwardly, she rolled her
eyes and looked pointedly at the hand still trapping her wrist.
“No you not. You’ve got a girly
car with an automatic transmission.”
She bristled, but managed to hide that.
In a dry voice she pointed out, “You’re right.
he might have done so a bit regretfully out of her head – and she turned the
keys in the ignition and put the car in drive, cursing Cora for being right the
entire time.
*******************************************
Once they reached the gym, Sands led
Tess into one of the private workout rooms in the back.
mirrored wall and the padded floor. She
set her bag down, but didn’t move to do anything else.
Sands ignored her, and walked to the middle of the room.
from the door. “Are you going to
stretch? It’s usually a good idea before
pounding the crap out of someone. Or
before getting the crap pounded out of you.”
Tess made a face when she heard the dry mockery in his voice, but she
took his advice. Apparently there was no
getting out of this. And the idea of
having the opportunity to ‘beat the crap’ out of him did hold a certain amount
of appeal.
When Tess moved further into the room and started her own stretches,
Sands bit back a grin. He’d kept his
distance because he’d known that Tess was going to be jumpy around him, not to
mention that her new knowledge and their last ‘experience’ together were
probably not conducive to getting her to jump into bed with him again.
first part of that was getting on her nerves enough that she’d take the
opportunity to get back at him. He
watched as she removed her jacket, revealing her lack of concealing
clothes. For some reason, he’d thought
she’d wear baggier clothes – certainly, everything he’d seen her in up to this
point had practically covered her from chin to toes.
cleavage the tank top in particular displayed, but kept his mouth shut.
Tess sat down and removed her shoes as well, revealing the fact that she
was wearing ankle braces. Sands absorbed
this fact with a bit of surprise – apparently Tess wasn’t as perfect as he’d
always thought. She was nuts and she had
weak ankles. The things you miss when you have no eyes.
She stretched, unaware of what thoughts were running through Sands’
head. First she stretched her legs out
in front of her, bending at the waist until her forehead was on her knees and
her fingers met behind her feet. Then
she pressed the soles of her feet together, making sure her knees were firmly
on the mats, then stretched again.
running into shady territory by now.
Then when Tess stood and bent over to touch her toes . . . .
Ohh . . . Sands examined the
way Tess rested her hands on the floor as her feet stayed flat and her butt
pointed up in the air. As enjoyable as
the view was, he turned away before things got a little too enjoyable. While he was
open to the possibility of getting laid, Sands had to
remind himself what his priorities were at the moment.
Tessa’s fighting skills were. That had
to come first. It’d be one less thing to
worry about on the field. Tomorrow he
planned to take her down to the shooting range and see what types of weapons
she knew how to handle.
She’s got very nice hands for ‘handling’
things. “Stop stalling, niña.”
“You’re such a nag, Sands.” Tess
stood and faced her companion. As she’d
stretched and felt her muscles start to warm, the suggestion of a fight had
started to sound better and better.
Anything to rid herself of the underlying tension that’d been making her
muscles scream with inaction and her head throb with a low-grade headache for
the past weeks. As much as she tried to
deny it, she remembered exactly what had happened between them; she remembered
how she’d felt to see him again, how the voice in her head had begged for her
to take what he was offering – or for her to let him take what she had once
offered – how his body had felt against hers.
It hadn’t felt wrong . . . but she couldn’t say that it felt
she wasn’t happy that they’d spent the night together.
is character minus what you’ve been caught doing.
her, willingly thrown whatever respect he might have had for her out the window
. . . willingly let him manipulate her.
She wanted her respect back. That
was the only reason she was still here.
They faced off, neither of them saying anything.
apparently understood that by offering the challenge, he was leaving himself open
for anything she might try.
Tess waited patiently as he circled her, waiting for him to make the
first move. There was no sense in giving
her hand away too early.
force.
Sands finally lost his patience.
He knew Tess knew at least one way of discouraging a frontal attack, so
he circled behind her, then tried to pin her arms.
solar plexus. Sands instinctively curled
around his stomach, avoiding the blow, but quickly recovering.
arm out to knock aside the punch he’d aimed at her chest.
wrist and twisting it up behind her back, taking her to the ground in the same
move she’d used on him before. “Just a
little too predictable, niña. Try
again.” He let her up and Tess climbed
to her feet, a sizzle of anger burning at the base of her neck.
This time it was her turn to attack.
She feinted a right hook at his cheekbone;
Sands believed her, and stumbled back when she caught him on the collarbone
with her left foot. Tess quickly
regained her balance, settling back into a defensive position; she was much
better at defense than she was at offense.
The exchange of blows went on for some time, Tess losing more than she
won. Sands quickly analyzed why that
was; she refused to press her advantage when she had it.
could. No one ever won by staying strictly on the defensive.
pinned her to the floor, he made an irritating comment, hoping that anger would
do what his challenge had failed to do; she was hiding still.
give in though. She tried to shrug off
his comments, tried to cage the impatience that was building up inside
her. Why couldn’t he just accept that
she could hold her own if worst came to worst?
Why did he have to push for knowing the full scope of her skill?
As she was distracted by these thoughts, Sands was able to knock her
feet out from under her again. She
air in and out of her body and listening to her blood pound in her ears.
and she could feel her body protesting against the amount of exertion she was
demanding from it. She was so tired, in
fact, that she merely let her head drop back to the mat, aware that she was just
amplifying his image of her as a weak woman.
It shouldn’t matter what he thinks
anyway.
Sands just shook his head as he stood over Tess.
heaving as she tried to regain her breath.
She had a coat of sweat covering her skin, a match to the perspiration
breaking out of his face and along his back.
“Take a break, chiquita.” A
thought struck him. “When you no longer
look like a call girl who’s just earned her pay, we’ll pick things back
up.” Her eyes opened, anger glinting in
their depths. He smirked.
Looks like Tess doesn’t want to be reminded just how thoroughly I know
her. “Not that I don’t enjoy the
sight – it does bring several delightful memories to life.
for another thirty minutes. If you’d
rather forgo the training altogether and have hot monkey sex, then –”
Tess felt her control over her temper snap.
surprise; he toppled as she propelled herself to her feet.
pin him to the floor for once, but he
was prepared and flipped her over his head.
She landed on her back, feeling her muscles protest the air was knocked
from her body. Sands was on top of her
before she knew it, straddling her body but not pinning her arms to the
floor. It didn’t matter, or at least it
wouldn’t until she could breathe again.
“What’s wrong, Teresa? Did I hit
a sore spot?” If he wasn’t careful, this
was going to go farther than he’d planned for this afternoon.
just like every other person on the planet and just want to get laid every once
in awhile?” No answer.
that I was the one you eventually let get past your straight-laced exterior?”
pushing her so far. It was true that the
plan was to eventually get back in her pants, but . . . “Oh, I know what it
is. You don’t like remembering what it’s
like to give all your control to someone you don’t like.
can make you feel. You don’t like the
fact that you liked being treated
like a two-bit whor–”
Tessa’s fist caught his cheekbone. He
recoiled from the blow.
Tess arched under him, flipping him onto his back, then
straddled his waist as her hands
locked around his wrists. She had to
make him be quiet. She didn’t want to
hear what he was saying, because it was exactly what she was afraid
Sands recovered his wits quickly, looking up at Tess from his position
on his back. He tested her hold and
found that she meant business; she was supporting some
of her weight on her arms, a double insurance that he wouldn’t get free.
confusion. It wouldn’t take more than a
few words to make her act out on what she was feeling.
did he want her to? Why not? “I should have
known you’d like being on top.”
Tess knew that if she didn’t him him shut up, she was going to do
something she regretted, but her hands were somewhat full at the moment.
Sands into submission on a jet plane.
She seized onto that image and repeated the procedure without question.
Her body reacted, sealing off Sands’ mouth with hers.
arousal that’d been plaguing him for the past hour burst into full-flower.
fully to her desires was to get her so upset that she couldn’t think
straighpan pan style='mso-spacerun:yes'> Unfortunately, by that point,
he couldn’t think straight either.
Tessa struggled as Sands rolled them with his body, taking control of
the kiss. His voice was silenced now,
but hers wasn’t. She was having a hard
time telling if this was a good thing, a bad thing, an imaginary thing, or a
memory. When Sands started to roughly
grope her body, she realized that this wasn’t a memory or imaginary, but the
other two points were still undecided.
Was this good or bad?
While you’re trying to decide that, maybe you should, I don’t know, take
over again?
Tess agreed. She softened her
lips enough that Sands would think she was giving in to him.
her, trying to decide just how far it was safe to go at the moment.
again rolled them over, making sure to pin his hips this time instead of his
hands. Her internal battle raged on,
giving her no reason to stop or to proceed.
Sands was the one that finally settled her physical indecision; one of
his hands wrapped itself in her hair and brought her head down to meet his.
This time, the kiss was softer, passionate instead of ruthlessly
dominating. As his lips teased hers,
Tess felt the argument for ending things now fading before the urge to let
things go further. The sensations were
still too new for her to deal with, different from the last time they’d done
this.
When Sands pushed himself up to his knees, Tess moved with him,
scrambling to keep some space between their bodies, but refusing to give up
their lip-lock. Sands tohat hat he could
get at the moment, sure that he could persuade her to eventually get naked with
him. He had to bite back a moan as one
of her hands slid into his hair, playing with the sweat dampened strands with
fingers made gentle by uncertainty. God,
this woman was so arousing. One moment
she was fully in command of herself, the next she was as hesitant as a
schoolgirl. Part of him cried out to
educate thimidimid side of her, part said that he was taking advantage of her
sexual innocence, and part of him said he really didn’t give a damn.
of herself.
ck'> Yes,
other than the fact that her own mind betrays her sometimes.
you’ve aroused? Maybe it’s Tess, but
maybe it’s crazy!Tess.
kiss, trying to ignore his conscience.
He’d lived most of his life without it – he didn’t need it butting in
now.
Tess moaned as Sands’ tongue confidently thrust into her mouth.
felt good, and she’d so rarely felt
good.
If Sands was a drug, then she was well on her way to addiction, and if
there was one thing she’d learned growing up in a drug family, it was how well
people could be controlled through their additions . . . .
Sands groaned as Tess pu fre free, but he didn’t fight her.
any doubts that might be running through her mind, but that’d just make things
harder for him the next time around.
Tess got to her feet, unpleasantly surprised to find that her knees were
a bit shaky. Nonetheless, she backed
away from Sands, slowly shaking her head.
She wouldn’t allow herself to be controlled.
“Running, conejo?”
“Of the 36 ways of avoiding disaster, running away is always
best.” Still
kng hng her eyes trained on the man who was upsetting her, Tess picked up her
shoes, jacket, and bag, and left the room before he could say anything else.
He let her go. He’d seen the
confused and accusing look in her eyes – hardly a look that inspired him to
press her for more. She was skittish and
she didn’t trust him . . . but she was vulnerable when it came to him.
was somewhat vulnerable to her as well.
It was a good thing that Tess had left when she had, he had to do some
thinking about exactly what he wanted from her and how to best do that.
Groaning, he got up from the floor, ignoring his knees as they let out
quiet protests. He slipped on his own
shoes and left the private room, not at all surprised to find that Tess was
nowhere in sight. Not that it mattered
at the moment, but she was going to have to get used to working under his
command.
*******************************************
Tess had retreated to the ladies’
locker room. In her state, it would be a
mistake to get behind the wheel of a car.
she went into one of the curtained dressing rooms and sat down on the bench,
hugging her knees to her chest and resting her forehead on them.
Quietly, she tried to catch her breath.
That had been too close. It was
one thing to make a mistake once; it was another thing entirely to make it
again. But no matter how hard she tried
to clear her mind, she could still feel the texture of Sands’ lips against
hers, the heat of his hands. She
realized she was shaking. With effort,
she stilled her body.
tensed. No. He’s not that
important. If I was going to go through withdrawal,
it would have been last year after I’d been around him for months.
same mistake twice.
feelings and sensations.
to leave?
No.
Fed up, Tess thought harshly, Then just what is it
that I should have done?
strength even if you strive.
She recognized the quote from Homer.
Just what are you suggesting?style='mso-spacerun:yes'> She had the feeling that she ’t g’t going to
like it.
I’m suggesting that if you don’t want to turn into an unthinking pile
of goo every time Sands touches you, you need to learn how to cope with the
feelings he causes.
that is to experience them, and there’s only one way to
counsel. She knew what that meant.
all. You felt that.
the last time. If every time I . . .
become intimate with someone is going to be different, then this is a pointless
exercise.
It’s
not like I want you to go out and sleep with every man
you meet. Just the one that presents the
worst threat. Once you know what to
expect from him and from your body, then you’ll be fine.
The hormones released during and after sex can be very habit forming.
Don’t worry. I’ll handle that
part.
That didn’t comfort her.
every chance he gets. What is it that
Sun Tzu said?
weakness and exploit it.
cockamamie scheme some thought.
is that I shore up that particular weakness before he can get a good foothold.
It’s
better than falling into bed with him against your better judgment.
you’re doing it, then it shouldn’t be that bad.
added,
cell phone was ringing and that it probably had been for some time.
answered it. “Hello?”
“Aunt Tess, Amy wants to know if I can spend the night at her house.”
Tess smiled at the plaintive tone in
conversation. Sands would love to spend the
night with you.
school night,
You mean it won’t happen tonight.
tomorrow off. It’s parent-teacher
conferences.”
It won’t happen
Then, is your homework done?”
“Yes, Tía.”
Tess put her importunate voice on hold as she considered
asked Mrs. Milner?”
“Yes.”
“All right, then it’s fine with me.”
told Tess that Amy was at
your room is picked up before you go, or I’ll come over and get you.”
“Yo prometo, tía.
hung up, resting her head against the wall of the small changing room.
voice had quieted for the moment, and that her body – while sore – was once
more under her control.
Being very careful to remain focused only on leaving the gym, Tess left
the dressing room. She avoided meeting
anyone’s eyes as she exited the building.
As long as she didn’t get distracted from keeping her mind blank, she
could keep her voice under control – or at least unaware of what else was going
on around her. And it worked . . . until
she got to her car.
If she had been fully in her own little world, she probably wouldn’t
have noticed the small note tucked under her windshield wiper, but Tess had
learned long ago that being in ‘your own little world’ was just as dangerous as
letting her voice run wild through her mind.
So, since she hadn’t closed herself off from the surrounding world, she
instinctively reached out and took the note from her windshield, holding it in
one hand as she unlocked her car and got back inside.
You didn’t check the backseat first.
to. Sands got what he wanted . . . for
today.
Setting her bag on the passenger’s seat, Tess opened the note.
Tess rested her head on the
steerwheewheel in defeat.