Once Beautiful

“Ryan…If you were ever to be caught, what would I do….” Gareth said softly to himself as he watched Ryan dance half-heartedly with some woman. Gareth was sure Ryan had feelings for him and that this was just a façade to keep up appearances with those snooty bastards who spurned Gareth every day and almost drove him to murder. But Ryan kept Gareth from going completely mad. Ryan’s love and trust for Gareth, even hidden as it was, was absolutely pure and doubtless to the young man.

Little did he know what Ryan was *REALLY* planning. Had he known that, he never would have believed he loved him. Poor simple Gareth, he may have been a few years Ryan’s senior, but he was no where near as smart as Ryan. The poor man…But Ryan felt so bad after what happened. Gareth wanted him so badly and that was why Ryan gave himself to him, The bed shook every night when they were together, moaning so loudly that people woke up in the other rooms and wondered who Ryan and Gareth were with. They didn’t believe someone like Ryan could be gay. As he drew nearer and nearer to release, Gareth grabbed Ryan’s hips and jammed himself into him as far as he could go and released, his cock throbbingly hard when he did. Ryan grinned, always enjoying it with Gareth. At first, he’d been apprehensive after what had happened to him as a child, but now Ryan enjoyed every moment he spent in bed on his hands and knees or with his legs in the air. This was why he was very unsure of what he was about to do to Gareth.

He did something quite cruel. Let this short chapter in Ryan’s life be a confessional to you the audience. You need to hear this if you still fancy Ryan the hero of this story. He believed himself to be just as bad as Corvair but in a worse way. At least Corvair is gutterscum outright. No silly little fake innocence and naïveté that Ryan believed himself to feign at every turn. No, he too was scum….Trash….Blooded hands unworthy to touch even a fucking street whore like the ones he gutted like the pigs they were in his bedroom each night.

One evening, he brought home no whore, only Gareth. Gareth came over to him as usual and kissed him passionately, a kiss he returned and they fell into bed, Ryan crashed into Gareth’s arms, all resistance was gone from him and he was in love. Ryan suddenly regretted what would happen when they were done…But he wanted it more than the love, more than the acceptance, more than the fuck. He had to kill someone tonight and it had to be the only person who made him feel weak and like a fucking dirty whore.

Gareth finally finished and lifted him, placing Ryan next to him and leaning in for a kiss, which he gladly and lovingly gave him. However, Ryan asked him to get up and to come to the window with him after that and that was when Ryan pushed him. Out the window he fell, silent, hurt. That was worse than if he’d screamed or cursed Ryan’s name. Ryan almost wished he had hated him as he stared down at the broken body with blood all around it like the wings of an angel. No! No! He was strong, he cleaned up and called the police. Ryan told them it was rape and they listened, calling it self defense. The fools weren’t even curious about how it was that all these people…Gareth, Anderson, the whores…all died in my presence. Maybe the dumb pathetic imbeciles thought Ryan was simply cursed…Maybe that was it. Ryan laughed a little at the prospect of this ludicrous idea.

He felt a heavy weight in my heart however. He could not escape his love for Gareth and that was when he knew he had to run away. Ryan hopped the first boat to America. As soon as he arrived, he simply flashed a wad of cash he’d had transferred to dollars at the bank, immediately Ryan was set with a mansion, two wonderful servants and anything he could want. His servants, old Hildegard and old Stefan, her husband were given a generous salary and fine clothes as well as the lovely guest house of Ryan’s manor. Ryan had no need for guests and the servants quarters were deplorable.

At any rate, he was out one night, his bloodlust needing to be quenched and as he killed his quarry for the night, he heard a sound of amazement and turned around only to find a small girl. Her name, she told him, was little Elena and she was an orphan. He made up my mind that he needed a successor and that was when he adopted the girl. She was just like him as a child, but she’d have a far less disturbing upbringing, he vowed.

Ryan set up a lovely little room for Elena and gave her that entire side of the house. She was allowed anywhere at all, free reign. Any child would die for a house like this one, but Elena wouldn’t have to. All she would have to do was follow in Ryan’s footsteps as a sort of…Jacqueline The Ripper, if you will. He knew she would do beautifully and he was so proud of her.

Elena liked to watch Ryan kill the whores he would bring home. ‘I never wanna be like one ‘a them ladies.’ She’d spit as she polished her own little knife, a birthday gift he’d given her a while ago, she was twelve now. Ryan, however, began to feel a bit guilty….he was teaching a little girl to kill and he had killed the man he’d loved, what was he becoming? As he thought this, Elena went up to bed and Hildegarde came over, draping a blanket over Ryan’s shoulders. “Ryan, dearie, don’t fret so, it’s time you went off to bed.” Hildegarde said softly, taking him by the arm and chiding Stefan to take the other. They brought him upstairs and tucked him into bed, each saying goodnight with a kiss on the forehead and leaving. “Like the little boy we never ‘ad.” Hildegard said to Stefan as they left the room. Ryan was proud, he finally had a family…