Hindsight

Hindsight
Kireania

AN: Nothing much in this chapter. Just that Krys and HB finally meet WOOT!!! LOL So once again I’m working on my other fics so this might start slowing down once those start going but I’m not sure I’m really stuck on this one right now. If you see any major mistakes please let me know. I’m usually not too awake when I’m editing these.

Warning: Nothing in here just random mentions of words.

Chapter Five
Meeting You


When I told her to run away from her family and come to me or hell just find somewhere safe I didn’t realize something like this could happen. I didn’t even think that her family was that fond of her. Obviously the abuse was more than just abuse, it was a teaching tool. A way to teach her where her place was and that is at the very bottom of that family.

Every injury that she has is my fault. Every scratch that scars over is my doing. I might as well have been the one to put them there. I told her to run. I told her that she would be safer if she just left and now where is she, injured and in a coma in the BPRD intensive ward. Very few that go in here, besides me, ever come out unscathed or even alive.

I’m watching over her, of course. I won’t let her out of my sight until she is about to wake up then John can take over. With how she reacted Blue out at central I doubt she would want to be anywhere near me, so I’m not even create a situation that will cause her any fear. I want her to know who I am so bad but obviously it’s not going to happen. She’ll probably just lump me in as a monster right in with the wolves that were chasing her.

I glance at her as she just lays there in the white hospital cot. If it wasn’t for the monitors I would swear she was dead. She hasn’t moved once since she passed out in Central. It’s been three days and I haven’t moved from my post beside her bed for more than a moment or two since she was put here. I can’t leave her side now that she is finally here, no matter how exhausted I am.

I smile a bit as I see her blonde hair. Well my imagination was dead on with that little tidbit about her. Her skin actually isn’t as pale as I thought it would be but she is pale and tiny. Compared to Liz she’s smaller, not shorter but smaller. I know I really shouldn’t be looking right now but hey I’m a guy but I’m pretty sure given some proper meals her chest would be bigger than Liz’s if they aren’t already. I shake my thoughts away and focus on her relaxed face.

Damn but if she isn’t gorgeous. My mind couldn’t come up with an image this perfect if it had had details to actually work off of. I want to touch her, just push her hair out of her face or even just lightly touch her cheek but I can’t. With the way she reacted to Blue when he went to help her in Central Park after I pulled her out of the water I doubt she would be too pleased to find out that a monster had been watching her, much less touching her.

I didn’t really see everything but I saw enough to know that she only reacted when Blue came up to her. John was next to her and she didn’t cry out in fear, but when Blue came to help she whined and tried to move away. I couldn’t stay to watch, I had to kill the rest of the wolves but that was enough for me. Blue doesn’t look as threatening as I do. I have more muscle mass and I just seem more overwhelming and people say that. But this is probably the one time where I almost wish I wasn’t so overwhelming.

I’m too caught up in just staring at Krys to notice Abe walk in. But at least he gets my attention right away; at least I’m hoping it was right away. I ignore him right away knowing what he’s going to say for once. He wants me to go get some rest in my room. He wants me to go eat something decent. He wants me to leave. I’m not sure if he understands who she is to me or not but I’ve tried to explain that I just can’t leave but he still tries.

“She’s not going anywhere, Red.”

I ignore him.

“You need to give your body the rest it needs, other wise when you need it your body will fail you.”

Again I ignore him.

“What if you need to protect her and you can’t because you are too tired?”

That got my attention. My eyes leave her face and I look at my friend intensely. “That won’t happen.”

“It could. Your body could fail to respond fast enough due to lack of rest and food. All I’m asking is that you go take a short nap and get a small meal. I’ll have Agent Myers in here; watching her in your stead if that will calm you?”

I have to look back at Krys’ sleeping form as I think hard. I would never forgive myself if something happened to her just because I was too tired or too hungry, but what if something happens while I’m asleep. It’s harder than anything to wake me up and then to get me to a point that I‘m actually awake that’s a feat that takes a while. Once again Abe shows off either how well he knows me or how easily he can read my mind.

“I can bring you into full consciousness easily, if anything should happen. I doubt anything will though.”

I sigh and give in to Abe’s wishes but only for Krys’ sake. I need to be able to protect her and I can only do that when I’m not sleeping on the job. I look at Abe and nod heavily before standing up.

“Get Scout and get him to watch her until I come back. I want to be up in three hours. No later, good?”

It’s obviously less than what he wants but he takes it. He knows he at least got something from this. He steps to the side of the door and I hover a bit over her bed and look at her for another moment, what if she’s not here when I get back? What if she wakes up and runs? Blue said he’d wake me but it’s obvious from earlier that this girl can run. I shake my head and turn and walk out the door, Blue follows me so that he can go tell John of his new post. She hasn’t woken up in three days what’s the chance she’ll wake up in the next three hours?

*********************

I can hear voices at different times fluttering about. I never really catch their conversation but I can hear them. Mostly I just feel his presence. I don’t know how I know it’s him but I just do. I can just tell that the one that is beside me is Red. I feel safe and that’s a feeling I’ve never felt before. He never moves away from me for more than a few moments but he is never really close to me either. It’s almost like he’s scared of me, or of something else.

Unless the other voices are there he rarely talks so I don’t really know what he sounds like but that’s ok at least he’s here with me and if he’s been here this long I doubt he’ll leave. I wish he would come closer but he doesn’t so I take the comfort that I can get and I heal myself. This is the first time I’ve ever been allowed to heal for this length of time. I usually have to be awake and moving within hours after passing out. My wounds never heal fully, I’m always pushing the last of the healing off because by that time it’s off to the next session and I have bigger injuries to worry about.

I pick up those voices again. It feels different this time. I don’t understand why this feels different until I feel him moving away. I want to cry out and my mind does but no one can hear that. I’m too far deep into my sleep to make any noise, move or do anything that can show my distress. My body remains motionless.

I’m completely alone. There is no one near me and even if there was I’m pretty sure that would scare me beyond belief anyway. I don’t want anyone but him next to me. I need to be safe and Red is the only one that makes me feel safe. That might sound illogical but that’s what I feel with his presence near me. I still need to heal but without Red near me I don’t think I can. I have to find out where he went I have to go be near him.

I don’t know how long it takes me to wake myself up, my internal clock has long since been screwed up, but it feels like it takes forever. I have to force feeling back into my toes, it’s really hard to wiggle them when you can’t feel them, but eventually I do. I guess I’m having trouble feeling my limbs because of how long I’ve been asleep but I’m not sure, it’s never happened before.

Eventually I have feeling back everywhere. It feels weird not being in my room. I can easily see that there is light in the room, even though my eyes are still closed but I’m used to being in pitch black. The bed is much more comfortable than my cot back home, and there is a strange beeping sound off to my left.

I peek my eyes open and instantly have to shut them, the lights are extremely bright and though I can adjust pretty quickly, I’m not joking when I say I’m used to waking up in pitch black. I try to open my mismatched eyes again and this time at least I can keep them open in a squint. I pull my left arm up to shield my eyes and give a little whimper.

My arm more than any other part of my body right now, hurts. I couldn’t tell while I had been struggling with that Werewolf but it must have broken it more than once, hell it feels like I just slammed my whole arm in a door multiple times. I turn my head and try to find where that annoying beeping noise is coming from and I see and strange thing. It’s a box with a shiny front that has a constantly moving line. Well now if that isn’t just the weirdest thing I’ve ever seen.

I have to sit up and I barely notice that my eyes have fully adjusted as I stare at the beeping thing. Inching my way out of the white bed my feet touch the cold floor but that’s not new so I easily ignore it and I just watch the line. I see some words on the side and I tilt my head as I read them. Heart rate? That line is a heart rate? I look at the line again and I watch it…I can’t help but wonder if every time the line and beep go off if that is supposed to mean that the heart beats. That could make some sense, but whose heart is it measuring?

It sure isn’t mine.

My heart is no where near that fast, especially when I’m asleep. When I’m asleep I can be thought to be dead. My heart is really slow and my breathing is almost nonexistent. Hell even when I’m awake my heart doesn’t beat that fast, hasn’t in a long time, that day had to have been the one time I’ve ever seen my mother seem even slightly concerned. She was more worried that her little test subject was dead but still she was concerned about me.

Syan had almost declared me dead, he actually went to medical school, but after he listened for a while he realized what the latest additive to my blood had done. My heart rate and breath rate had just dropped, and yet they couldn’t find anything else that was affected. My mother had tested me for a long time after that watching for any other side affect that I could just randomly show but none developed.

This heart rate though was not mine, so I’m confused. Why is this thing here when it’s not showing my heart rate? I shake my head and just decide to ignore it. I look around the room and spot the open doorway. That must be where Red left through. I head to that door and peak out. I’m not sure where I am but I’m going to be careful, I don’t need any more monsters after me, nor do I need Red getting mad at me. I don’t see anyone passing in the hall so I slip out and try to melt into the wall. There are many hallways and many doors. Different doors hold people, some hold creatures, I’ve never seen before but I don’t stick around to find out about them. I just want Red.

I have no idea where I’m going but every time I hear someone coming my way I duck down a different hallway and now I know I can’t even find my way back to that room I was originally in. I’ve been wandering around for a while now and I feel like crying, I’m tired and my arm is starting to throb in pain. Perhaps it would have been better to just stay asleep and risk not being safe, it’s not like I’ve been safe for most of my life anyway.

A soft cry gets my attention by my feet. I jump and look down ready to cry out that I’m sorry to whatever has found me. What I find is a small creature with diamond like eyes that stare at me with a look of understanding and affection. I recognize this animal instantly, this is a cat and if I’m right this is one of Red’s cats. I smile and crouch down to it. I can’t tell you how I know but somehow I can tell that this is a female without looking, perhaps it’s because out her distended belly. She’s heavily pregnant and she’s really sweet. I wonder if she was looking for me. I reach out my left hand without thinking and as soon as her head gently knocks against it in greeting I’m biting back a moan of pain.

I’m left handed so I do everything with my left hand without thinking, but I really have to remember that that arm REALLY HURTS!! I pull my hand back and cushion it against my chest but I put my right hand out and scratch the cat’s head and smile when I hear the vibrating sound that Red has told me is the cat sound called purring. My knees start to hurt from crouching down so I lower myself further and I place my knees on the cold floor but I ignore the cold. I’m just focused on the cat right now.

“Hey pretty. Were you looking for me? You wouldn’t happen to know someplace safe around here would you?” My voice is barely a whisper as I plead with her, hoping that she knows someplace where I can relax. Or maybe she can even take me to Red. I pull her to me and pick her up a little and put her head under my chin and her purring gets that much louder. We stay like that for a moment but then she must decide its time to go for she moves out of my arms and walks down a hall that I have just dodged out of.

She moves to the middle of the hall and looks back at me. I swallow hard but I nod at her and understand her message. I’m to follow her. I must be far away because she seems to be in a hurry. She leads me through hallway after hallway, and though I hide whenever I hear someone coming she waits for me to come out of hiding before she moves on. With her guiding me we easily get to a more lived in section of where ever we are and I feel like hiding more and more but she yowls at me to continue on and I trust her.

I look up from her and I see up ahead that there is a large silver door like thing up ahead. I’ve never seen any door like this one. It has bars on it and it looks huge and heavy. I look down at the pregnant cat and raise my eyebrow at her, is this for real? She rubs her body against the door and I know that her home is on the other side of the door so I step up to it and look at it for a moment.

I sigh harshly, I can’t figure out how to open this damn thing. The cat meows and I look down at her and my eyes catch hers. My breath catches as suddenly I’m in her mind as she’s watching many different people opening the door from the outside. We watch and we learn as those people open the door and then just as she is about to enter the room of her owner I’m back in my own mind. I crouch down and scratch her head in thanks, with my right arm, and go back to the door and open it the way I saw in her memories. No wonder Red loves cats they are very helpful, they share their memories when you’re stuck and they come find you when you’re lost, maybe I can have a cat of my own.

The door is actually pretty heavy and I open it enough to get my small body through and I mean to close it all the way but I get distracted by the room I enter so I accidentally leave the door cracked open. This room is huge and is actually kinda dim. It’s not too bright in the lights so my eyes feel relaxed, unlike out in those halls, and the room is so huge. I’m gaping in shock at the sheer size at this being someone’s bedroom. I hear a cry at my feet and I look down. The pregnant cat is greeting a male cat very enthusiastically. That must be her mate. They look like they love each other very much. He licks her face and her paws with such affection in his bright green eyes I almost melt and wish I was the female cat.

I smile as they walk off, she must have a little corner set up so she can have her kittens, and he must guard her. My attention goes back to the rest of the room even as more cats come up to greet me. I soon am carrying one in my good arm and it is purring loudly. I really am loving these cats. This room feels safe, it has his feel to it and it’s just like he described. Filled with cats and covered in clothes. I’m actually still in the doorway, not having moved much, my eyes having done most of the moving, but now my feet move. I see a large piece in the middle of the room, his bed perhaps, though why would he need a bed that big?

I move slowly through the room, my eyes taking in everything. I want to learn everything, but I know I’m going to have to go back to sleep soon, I’m starting to get really tired. I get close enough to see over the raised edge of what I think is the bed and I look in and I almost gasp. My left hand comes up to my mouth automatically and even though pain still shoots through me I’m taken by the sight that greets my eyes.

I’m not sure what he is, but I can tell that he’s not human. He’s bright red and he’s huge. I thought Syan and Zenir were tall; they’re both about 6 footish. He’s sleeping without a shirt on so I can see some circular designs engraved into his skin. I force my eyes to travel up his body and I look at his face. He has serious looking face but it’s relaxed now, so he looks pretty close to my age, he said he was only in his 20s. On his forehead I see what looks to be stubs…I wonder what’s supposed to be there. I wonder if he keeps them down or if they’re like that on they’re own. I’m seriously in shock but I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or not.

What I do know is that this shirt that I’m wearing, or whatever it is, is really uncomfortable and itchy and I can’t stand it anymore. Biting my lip I slip away from the sleeping form and ease over to where I think I see a clothing dresser. I hope he doesn’t mind me borrowing a shirt, but I’d rather not go around naked. I smile when I find the shirts on the first try. I take one out feeling a little bad but more relieved as I quickly strip and then toss the huge piece of clothe on. The itching stops immediately. My left arm is throbbing again; I’ve been moving it too much again. I whine a little but bite it back almost instantly; I don’t want to wake up Red.

I see a computer not too far away and I think about checking it to double check and see if I’m right but I shake my head. I don’t need to check. I know this is my Red. I walk back over to the bed and this time I’m on his side so I’m closer to him and I can see him better. I guess I’m a little upset he didn’t tell me he wasn’t human but at the same time I didn’t tell him that I can no longer be considered human either. Hell we didn’t really discuss what we looked like, it was some kind of unspoken rule or perhaps we were both just scared to give away our secrets.

Before I can stop myself my hand is reaching out to him, reaching out to touch. His arm first, I can feel the muscles right below his thick skin. They contract and release slightly under my touch and that movement guides my hand upwards to his shoulder. Again the muscle there is impressive. I can easily see him breaking me in two if I piss him off with such strength but I can’t see that ever happening, that doesn’t mean I’m not going to be careful.

My soft touch glides over his chest where I find more muscles and up his neck to his face. He told me he had a bad ass bad guy look. I guess he meant that many find him intimidating from his presence. I can see that but I don’t know if I can get that vibe from him. Maybe when he’s awake he gives it off better. I run the back of fingers along the side of his face, tracing his cheek bone. I’m leaning in closer now, my mismatched eyes don’t want to miss any detail, I might have not been expecting him to be like this when I first entered but I’m not unhappy. I’m pretty sure if he had been human I would have a much harder time accepting him than I do since he’s not.

My eyes catch a glimpse of those stubs and my curiosity gets a hold me. I am really pushing my luck here. He could wake up at any moment, he might yell at me, he might throw me out, he might send me back home, he just might smile at me and say that it’s ok; he just might not wake up. I’ve known him for three years and that familiarity gives me the courage to brush my finger tips along those stubs. They’re rough, yet the sides are smooth.

I feel where his skin meets them and I’m so curious as to what they are I don’t even realize that I have woken him up until his left hand closes over my left hand gently. My head snaps down and I find myself looking down into sleepy but alert bright gold eyes. I don’t know what to say, I can’t even move. I can feel my face turning red as I realize that I’m practically hovering over him on my good arm just touching him. My curiosity is going to kill me one day.

I watch as he blinks at me. I’m not sure what he’s thinking but I’m pretty sure I’m in trouble, I’m always in trouble. I close my eyes and turn my face away, scared beyond belief at getting yelled at. I don’t want him mad at me but I just know he’s going to be once he realizes that I snuck in and was wandering and snooping. I am trying to hold back my whine of pain but my fear combined with my pain works against me and it gets out. I feel his eyes on me but I still can’t look back at him, I don’t want to see the anger…

***************************

I had just been getting into the throes of a really bad dream when the first light touches came. I had known I was in a nightmare and I had just figured I had pulled myself out, like I do every now and then, but then those touches became more frequent and they became more solid. Those very touches are what drew me to consciousness to find the most beautiful sight I’ve ever seen hovering above me, studying my horns.

I have to suppress a shiver at those light touches, my horn stubs are really sensitive and her fingers are caressing them in just the right way that makes my lower body react. I have to get her to stop the wonderful touches before I do something that we both regret. I reach up with my flesh hand and grab the hand that was touching me as gently as I can manage. I can see that I have managed to shock her.

Our eyes meet and for the first time I see her eyes. Wow her eyes are amazing. She has one red eye and one violet eye, but they are both gorgeous and they are both so expressive. I see her fear and I almost think that she’s scared of me but I look again and right before she looks away I swear I see that it’s not me she’s scared of, but of my reaction to her.

I still have her hand in mine and I don’t want to let it go but when I hear her whine in pain, I instantly let go. My mind goes back to what I remember Abe telling me about her healing process. She’ll heal from the inside out. Her internal and much more dangerous and life threatening injuries will be healed fully before any of the out ones will be. It’s probably why she still looks like she’s been through hell and back. I can see bruises lining her cheeks, and her left arm, the one I had just been holding the hand of, is swollen and painful looking, and her right shoulder which I can see cause the shirt she’s wearing is falling off that side is bruised as well. Those must be injuries that haven’t been healed yet...

Wait a second that’s not the outfit she was wearing in the intensive ward. I stare at the shirt and it only takes a moment for me to recognize the material, hell it shouldn’t have taken me this long to notice it. She’s wearing one of my shirts! I sit up and watch as she scrambles backwards off the bed only to almost fall over. I have to move quickly and catch her so she doesn’t hurt herself even more. She’s shivering when as I hold her, maybe I was wrong, maybe she is scared of me.

I put her on the bed in a sitting position and I’m sitting as well. I’m trying to not think about her just sitting there in nothing but my shirt and her shivering in what I think is fear is helping but still she looks so gorgeous and my body is still reacting. I don’t know how she found me or how she even got here without anyone noticing but she’s here now and that’s all that matters.

The silence must have gotten to her because she’s suddenly babbling her head off and it takes me a second to realize that she’s apologizing. For what I don’t know but I listen closer and I hear that she’s apologizing for everything. My eyes narrow and I have to squish the urge to go and throttle her family at this very moment.

“…I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to sneak in here. I just wanted to know where you went. I mean I was asleep and you were next to me and then you left and I just wanted to know. I’m sorry that I was curious. Please don’t be mad. I’m sorry I borrowed a shirt. The outfit I had was really itchy and it was starting to really bother me. I’m really sorry. Please…”

I hush her stammering by putting my hand underneath her chin and lifting her face up to meet my gaze. Of course she’s stubbornly not meeting my eyes with hers.

“Krys look at me.”

Instantly her mismatched eyes are on mine. In all my imaginings I never imagined that this would be how we would meet and how we would have our first real conversation. I thought she knew me better. I know she does.

“Red, I’m sorry. Please don’t be mad at me…” Her eyes are really upset and I can tell that she’s really hoping I’m not mad. I don’t see anything to be mad at but I guess she does. Again I have to squish the urge to go kill her family right now.

“Hey it’s me you’re talking too. Why would I be mad? You’ve done nothing wrong Krys, you can stop apologizing.”

She looks baffled. I just smile at her and suddenly most of the fear in her eyes disappears as if it was on a puff of smoke. She closes her eyes and just as she does a tear slips from the corner of her right eye but I don’t question it because I see the most breath taking smile on her face. It is a small smile but it was a smile that said she felt relief that went through her entire being.

She leans into my hand and her eyes open to stare into mine, the deep rooted fear that I saw before not completely gone but I fear that it will be a long time before that will even happen but most of it has been washed away. A new look enters her eyes one that I have seen in John many times, especially when he first joined. Curiosity. She was curious about me, well I am about her as well but I doubt she’s ever seen anyone that looks even remotely like me so I hold myself in check.

I laugh lightly at the fact that I can see the question in her eyes and I can also see the struggle that she is having at trying to find the words to ask her question. She looks at me, trying to figure out why I just laughed.

“Just ask me Krys. I’ll answer whatever.” I try to reassure her. I know I’m being more open than I usually am but I mean how else am I supposed to be with Krys. I’ve known and relied on her for three years now, yea there are others I’ve known longer, but none that I trust more than her, well except for maybe Blue and father and John and Liz (but she’s a special case).

She hesitates for another moment or two before she decides to just go for it. “So ummm what exactly are you?”

I smirk and laugh again. That is exactly what I was waiting for. I think about feigning hurt and saying that I’m hurt that she doesn’t think I’m human when it’s obvious that I am but I reign my bad joke back and answer her honestly. I reposition myself on my bed and reach for one of my cigars. I light it up with a match and think about that for a second trying to find the perfect way to explain to her what I am. Funnily enough she’s almost distracted from her initial question by the cigar. She crawls up the bed that curious look on her face and she takes the cigar from my hand as I just stare at her.

I have to breathe through my nose for a few moments. Damn crawling should be on a list of things she is not allowed to do to me just yet. My lower half was just calming down but her unintentional show of crawling up my damn bed towards me just woke it back up again, DAMN. I take the cigar back from her right before she almost burns her finger from touching the lighted part. I can already tell that I’m going to be in teaching hell for a while…

“I’m a demon.” Her eyes focus back on my face and those wide eyes cause me to lose my thought for a moment. I am so screwed if this is how I get every time she looks at me, but I’ll be damned if I don’t like it.

“A demon?” I nod at her question but I see that demon is not a word that means anything to her.

“It’s hard to explain.” Damn I suck at explaining shit. I see that she’s confused. “I am actually really bad at explaining things.” She smirks at that. She knows I’m bad at explaining things; we’ve been through me trying to explain many things to her. I’ve tried to explain masturbating, cats, sex, dogs, oral, cars, positions, etc. Explaining masturbating is actually how we got to talking.

We were on a really stupid chat site, I don’t even remember where. I made the comment to someone and it was along the lines of “getting my rocks off” or something. Well she then messages me and actually asks me what I mean by that. I sarcastically ask if she’s like eight years old but she says she’s fourteen and that she just doesn’t understand. So I tried to explain cause I was curious. It takes a while but eventually I gave up on my definitions and I got the Dictionary.com definition and sent it to her.

She took such a long time to reply that I thought she’d been getting my goat but then she finally replied and she apologized for wasting time and that she had just never heard of the term masturbation before. Again I was sarcastic and responded with the comment “What are kept locked away in your room away from everyone all day or something.”

At the time I didn’t realize how close I had gotten. Nor did I realize that the fact that I had gotten that close was the only reason she kept talking to me at first. I’m lucky she did, I think I would be lost if she hadn’t…ok that just sounded really corny.

“I know you’re bad at explaining things, I’ve had to sit through many of your explanations, remember?” She’s teasing me now and I can tell that she’s relaxing because she is teasing. I smirk at her and just shake my head before I pull the cigar out of my mouth for a moment once again her eyes are on the cigar as if she scrutinizing it.

“It’s a cigar.” I tell her. She smiles shyly. I guess she wasn’t too sure what to make of this as well.

She takes it from my hand again and I just stare at her waiting for her to say something. Her face has become serious like she’s remembering something she’s not sure she wants to. She just stares at it this time; she doesn’t turn it over she just looks at it. I watch as it burns slowly but I don’t complain.

“Zenir, he smokes.” I instantly tense up and all thoughts of desire are immediately gone. I hadn’t expected her to bring up her family or that guy. “Not these. He smokes cigarettes. Every now and then as a privilege if I’ve been good, I was allowed to ask a question. So I asked him why he sometimes smelled different. He showed me his cigarettes and told me about them. Said only special people could have them. His cigarettes didn’t smell that great too me so I never knew why people wanted any. He also told me that there were different ones that were bigger and they had a different name but they smelled similar. I guess these were what he was talking about.”

She looked back up at me and gave me a small smile and handed me back the cigar. I almost put it out but she says something that stops me. “Those they smell sweeter almost. Much better than what Zenir smokes. Why are they different?”

I bring the thick cigar back to my lips and breathe in as I think about what to tell her. “Cigars are actually not as bad as cigarettes are for people. I know there’s less tar and toxins in them than cigarettes so that could be why.* It could be that cigars use fresher ingredients.* I do know though that Cuban Cigars are the best.*”

She’s listening and she seems to understand what I’m saying and when I say the last part she laughs cause she knows that it’s meant to be funny but it’s once again obvious that she doesn’t quite get the whole picture. I leave it though and I don’t try to explain to her that Cuban cigars come from an Island called Cuba and that they are expensive blah blah blah blah. Yea I really suck at explaining mainly cause I hate explaining.

She’s leaning against my shoulder and I smile down at her I’m shocked that she feels comfortable enough to lay against me but I don’t argue against it. I’m going to savor what I can. I glance at a clock near by. We must have been talking for about thirty minutes by now not to mention that I don’t know how long she was wandering around the BPRD or my room and she looks like she’s exhausted. I’m still pretty tired as well and with her here I think I can fall asleep quickly.

I motion for her to sit up and she does but I can see that she is already half asleep. How cute. I position her body so that her head is on the pillows comfortably and I give her enough space so that she can rearrange herself to however she sleeps normally. I give myself the edge of the bed, though I usually take near the middle, just to give her some privacy and I lay on my side so I can face her. I’m probably gonna end up on my stomach by the time I wake up but hey that’s just how I am, I hope she doesn’t sleep lightly.

*some time later*

I’m guessing we both fell asleep within moments of rearranging on the bed because the next thing I know I’m being awoken by someone prodding into my head. I grumble at them and try to turn my head away but that doesn’t stop the annoying prodding and now with that prodding my name is being called.

“Red wake up, we have to talk.”

I grumble evilly and glare up at the blue eyes of Abe. It takes my mind a moment to figure out why he would even be in my room. He’s rarely in here. Oh yea that’s right, he said he would wake me up in three hours. I look up at my clock and frown. It hasn’t even been two hours yet so why was he…

Oh yea, Krys.

Groaning I sit up and turn to look at the curled up body in my bed. She was still asleep thankfully but I don’t know how long she’d stay that way. Looking a little closer I noticed that she looked a tad better but not much, we must not have been asleep long, no wonder I don’t want to get up. Standing up I grunt at Abe and raise my eyebrows at him.

“How did she get here?”

He’s obviously pretty upset if he’s being this blunt. He’s usually blunt but not like this. I shrug at him. I don’t know how she got here and I tell him that.

“I dunno. I woke up and she was leaning over me. I don’t know how she got here.” I follow Blue outside of the vault door. I don’t want our voices waking her up if we just got to sleep. I notice that there are a few agents waiting around. I blink at them and Abe speaks to them and they nod and run off talking into their walkie talkies.

“What’s going on?” I have to ask. I wasn’t notified that something was wrong and I’m always told.

“When John went to go take up his position no more than fifteen to twenty minutes after we talked to him she was gone. We’ve been searching for her ever since. There was no sign of struggle and I could tell that no other had been in the room so we safely assumed that she had awakened and had panicked. When we tried to figure out where she was through the security cameras though it appears she was not on any of them but one and on that one she appears to not disappear but melt away.

I have no clue how she does this but we have search parties in the city, on surrounding BPRD property and within the very building. John is actually in the city but they are now being recalled now that we have found her. I was actually just coming to get you to wake you up to gain your assistance and perhaps your insight as to where she might go.”

I don’t know if I’m right in my anger but I don’t really care but I’m angry. “You should have come to me immediately. I told you if anything went wrong with her to come get me, not let me sleep!”

“You needed sleep and it was expected that she would panic when she awoke. I saw no need to get you immediately.”

“But Scout was supposed to be there with her to make sure she didn’t run away. I only agreed to get some sleep because you told me nothing would happen. You call this almost losing her NOTHING?!?!”

Blue doesn’t flinch from my anger, well used to my tantrums, but Krys is not used to them and even though we tried to not wake her she is right by the door in nothing but my shirt, awake and she has that scared look in her eyes again, whining in fear. My anger drains from me instantly and I cuss at myself.

I can tell that Abe is watching us intently, I know I’m acting similar to how I had with Liz but this time it’s different. I go to her and I touch her face gently and she looks up at me, she’s biting her lip and I barely stop myself from kissing her.

“Hey” I speak softly trying to calm her down. “What you doing up?”

She glances at Blue and steps closer to me as if she needs my protection from Blue, I almost laugh at that thought but I don’t and wait for her to speak. “You left.”

Her voice was soft but the meaning behind her words spoke volumes. She had been dead serious when she said she felt me leave before, while she had been rambling off apologies and excuses. Damn she can feel me leave? That’s kinda unusual, but everything about this, me BPRD in general is unusual. I smile down at her and try not to chuckle as she is still staring at Blue from around me while using me as a shield. So she is scared of Blue, cute.

I shake my head and get her attention and her eyes back up on me. “I’ll be back in, in just a minute. Turns out everyone was looking for you and was worried that you had left me without saying anything. Blue here was just coming to ask for me to come help look for you but we have everything worked out now. You can go back to sleep and I’ll be right back in, k?”

She stares at me for a few moments before she nods and then she gives blue another wary glance before darting back into the room. Unfortunately for me, the quick movement made my shirt hike up on her small body revealing a little tidbit of information I had logically known but could deny until now. She had absolutely nothing on underneath that shirt.

My body tightens as I am once again fighting against my own body’s responses. I hear a soft chuckle from Abe. I glare at him as he just has to comment before leaving.

“Should I get Agent Myers to pick her up some clothing while he’s down in the city?”

I only grunt in response to his comment but he’s already on his way down the hall so that he can get a hold of Scout and get Krys some clothes that actually cover her. Because no matter how enticing she is to me in my shirts I don’t want anyone else to see her in such little clothing.

I walk back into my room closing the door to my room tightly before I glance at the bed. I see her sitting up in the bed obviously waiting for me. My lower half is screaming now, but my mind and my heart are both fighting against it. Krys means much more to me than just a roll in the hay. I’m not going to hurt or scare her like that. I get my body under tight control and walk over to my bed and smile at her.

Her smile makes the hard fight worth it. She’s already under the blanket and when I slip back into the same position that I had been in before I find she is actually more awake this time to argue.

“You have no room.”

I shake my head at her. “I’m fine.” But my attempts to pacify her are useless. She actually not only wants me in the middle she wants to be close. I give in to her almost immediately. I can’t deny her anything so when she tilted her head and pouted slightly I scooted over to her and then that pout turned to a smile that would make a hundred cold showers worth it. She burrowed against my chest, her left arm cradled between her chest and mine while her right was slung over me.

In this position my stone hand is actually underneath her and surprisingly she doesn’t even give it a second glance. She’s not scared of it nor does it bother her I’m amazed, even Liz was cautious with my stone hand. Finally after arguing with myself for about five minutes I concede with what’s going one and I too fall asleep. Hopefully Abe won’t see fit to disturb us for the next long while.

An: Ok so the ending feels a little shaky to me. Please review and tell me what you think. Oh and the astracts at three of the sentances basically they just mean that I made those lines up. I have no clue why (in my personal opinion) cigars smell better.