Something Inside

All previous disclaimers apply.



“Ryan, please,” Gabriella was not a woman given to begging, but she couldn’t keep the pleading tone out of her voice as she lifted Ryan’s head and placed the goblet to his lips. He kept them stubbornly closed against the glass and she had to resist the urge to scream and throw it against the wall. Ryan would not die simply by refusing to feed for two weeks. It was not possible. If he continued to refuse to feed he would slip into a period of hibernation, not to be awoken until he was ready and willing to feed again. But, he would not choose to feed again if they couldn’t make him realize the destructive path of his thoughts was not true. If he slipped into a never-ending hibernation it would be as if he had died anyway. And with Sharpay’s current mental state if Ryan went into hibernation they would lose her as well. While Gabriella was concerned for Ryan himself, her main concern was for Sharpay. As was Troy’s.

Even as she tried to get blood down Ryan’s throat Troy sat on the bed, stroking Ryan’s hair, murmuring to him in a voice very much like Chad’s. He had spent the last three nights mimicking Chad, telling Ryan that he was not a monster, that running away had been a mistake. They had hoped that Ryan would be weak enough, unaware enough that Troy’s considerable skill at mimicry would work and he would drink for them, but so far it hadn’t been effective, though they kept trying. Ryan was so weak, he hadn’t opened his eyes is two nights. He had just given up and they knew it. Sharpay had torn out of their place an hour ago, furious, denying what was happening to Ryan. They were both hoping fervently that she hadn’t gone to kill Chad for what he had done. Chad was innocent of any wrong and also the only way Ryan would come back to them, but when Sharpay was angry she didn’t even think. She would kill him without thinking about the fact that he was the only person who could bring Ryan back to them.

“Please, Sharpay,” Gabriella whispered as she stroked Ryan’s brow, wanting to soothe him, wanting him to see that there were some who cared about him and would hurt if he went away from them again so soon, “Please, think for once.”

“Who says I don’t think?” Sharpay’s voice was sharp as she appeared in the doorway, hand on her hip.

“Where did you go, darling?” Troy asked, standing and crossing to her even as Gabriella smiled at her gently, not leaving Ryan’s side. When their girl killed for the pleasure of it, granted she hadn’t done that in nearly fifty years but when she did, she always came back to them covered in blood. She was perfectly clean now and purred as Troy took her in his arms and kissed her thoroughly.

“Ryan,” Sharpay whispered gently when Troy turned to smell who was coming up the stairs. Troy grinned at Gabriella and Gabriella smiled back. Their girl had done it for her brother. They were proud of her. She would be rewarded later when they were sure that Ryan was out of the woods.

“Ryan, I’ve brought someone to see you,” she kissed his brow and stroked his hair, smiling when he opened his eyes as his sensitive nose caught who was in the doorway.

“No,” Ryan murmured, the first thing he’d said in over a week. She had to fight not to wince at how weak his voice sounded, “Sharpay, you can’t bring him in here. What if I can’t resist? What if I hurt him?”

“You won’t hurt me, Ryan,” Sharpay and Gabriella stood as Chad approached the bed, grief and guilt on his face. He sat and took one of Ryan’s hands in both of his own. Ryan turned his face away, “Ryan, please look at me.”

“I scare you.”

“Sometimes,” Chad admitted honestly, “There will be times you scare me, Ryan. You’re so strong and you have to drink blood to survive. That would scare anyone.”

“How can you stand to look at me? I’m disgusting.” There was no life in Ryan’s voice and that scared them all, but they looked at Chad when he took Ryan’s chin in his hand and forced the blond to look at him.

“Ryan, you are not disgusting! Nothing you do, nothing you are is disgusting! I ran away because I was scared. I stayed away because of my pride. But, you never disgusted me and you never will.”

“And the fact that I have to drink blood to survive?” Ryan’s voice was so weak, Chad wasn’t sure how much longer he would be able to speak much less how much longer he could survive without feeding. That fact made Chad’s heart constrict and he rolled up the sleeve to his shirt, offering Ryan his wrist by setting it just against Ryan’s lips.

“It doesn’t matter to me how you have to survive, Ryan,” he whispered, “As long as you’re with me. I love you. Now, please, please drink.”

“What if I lose control with you, Chad?” Ryan closed his eyes and turned his face away again, pushing Chad’s wrist away, “I could kill you. I won’t take that chance.”

“It’s not your chance to take!” Chad cried out desperately and laid next to him, wrapping one arm around Ryan’s waist, and setting the other to his lips again, “You won’t lose control with me, Ryan. I trust you. I love you. Please, Ryan. Please drink.”

“You…” Ryan’s voice hitched around the emotion in his throat, “You really mean it, don’t you?”

“Of course I do!” Chad fought to keep the hysterical laughter that was bubbling up inside of himself down, “Ryan, I am pissed as hell that you kept something this big from me. I’m a little nervous knowing that there are four people in this house right now that could break me in half without thinking about it, two of them female. And I’ve decided that none of that shit matters because what matters is you and me and me wanting you for as long as possible, okay? Now will you just bite me and drink my blood? Because no matter how much saying something like that freaks me out I’m not losing you when I just got you. I’ve never said it to anyone romantically and I’ve already said it to you twice, but I’ll say it one more time. I love you, Ryan Evans. Drink. Now.”

Ryan’s eyes flashed with what could have been amusement or annoyance when he looked up and Chad was grinning down at him, “You’re going to annoy the hell out of me for the rest of your life, aren’t you?” His voice was weak, but the humor in it could not be denied.

“That’s the plan.”

“Good,” he placed a kiss to the offered wrist, “I love you, Chad.”

The others breathed a sigh of relief when Ryan bit into Chad’s wrist and began to drink while Chad rubbed his hand in slow circles on Ryan’s belly. Chad looked so happy, they were glad. They knew it couldn’t be easy for him to concentrate on making sure Ryan was fed and not what was happening to his own body. They knew the sexual jolt that their victims felt when they bit them, but Chad was ignoring it to concentrate on Ryan. Sharpay moved toward Troy and Gabriella and fell into Gabi’s arms, burying her face in the juncture between Gabi’s shoulder and her neck and breathing her scent in deep in relief. Troy moved to her back and wrapped his arms around both of his girls. Gabriella was whispering in an ancient Spanish dialect, her birth language. Neither Troy nor Sharpay had ever bothered to learn it. They liked to hear her speak it without knowing what she was saying. They found it hot. But, Troy had heard it enough to know that she was sending up a prayer of thanks and was so relieved himself that he didn’t even bother to wonder how she could still believe in God. She was one of the few vampires who did. They all turned back to the couple on the bed when Chad began to speak again.

“That’s it, Ryan,” Chad murmured, feeling a little sleepy, “Take all you need. Please. Whatever you need.” But, Ryan had stopped drinking. He kissed Chad’s wrist one more time and pushed it away. As if on some unspoken cue, Troy and Sharpay were at the bed, helping Ryan to sit up while Gabriella helped Chad out of the bed.

“You can’t give him all he needs right now, Chadwick,” Gabriella said gently, “It would kill you. But, look, everything will be alright now. Sharpay and Troy are already getting him to drink more.” Chad turned to see that what she said was true. Troy was supporting Ryan while Sharpay set a crystal goblet to his lips. Ryan’s eyes were closed, but he was drinking steadily. Gabriella pulled lightly on Chad’s arm, “Come. Let’s clean you up.”

“Is this too hard for you?” Chad asked when Gabriella had him seated on the toilet and was doctoring his still bleeding wrist. He briefly wondered why they even had such things as gauze and antiseptic in a house of vampires, but decided not to ask. “I can always do it myself.”

“No,” Gabriella smiled gently, her voice soft, “It’s never been hard for me to control myself when it comes to Ryan’s human lovers.”

Chad stiffened despite his best efforts to the contrary and failed to keep the sharp tone out of his voice, “And how many have there been?”

Gabriella said in a voice very like a lecturing teacher, “Don’t be jealous, Chadwick.” She giggled when she began to clean the wound and he hissed at the slight pain, “Don’t be a baby.”

“Hello? Human? I think that naturally makes me less tolerant to pain.” Chad scoffed, then laughed along when Gabriella threw her head back and laughed long and loud. It took them both a moment to gain control of themselves again as their laughter was more from relief and the release of emotion than it was from actual humor.

“Oh, you will be so good for him, Chad,” Gabriella couldn’t resist planting a quick, firm kiss to his mouth that had nothing to do with attraction and all to do with the thankfulness she was feeling in her heart, “I will tell you three things now that you need to know. Anything else you will have to learn from Ryan himself. Agreed?”

He nodded, not trusting his voice, shocked from the kiss and a little nervous as to what she was going to tell him.

“One: Ryan did not choose this life. He was turned against his will. Two: He loathes what he is almost to the core of his being. It is why he fell apart so quickly after he killed that man. Ryan hasn’t killed anyone for nearly two hundred years.”

“He must have been feeling so guilty already and I ran away from him.” Chad had felt the guilt well up again as she spoke and couldn’t look her. He put his face in his hands. Why the hell had he let his pride get in the way as long as it had? “Jesus. I’ll spend the rest of my life trying and I’ll still never make it up to him.”

“And three:” Gabriella lifted his chin and smiled at him again, “Ryan has had numerous lovers since he was turned, but only three loves. And neither of the others meant what you mean to him. Do not feel guilty for what had past, Chadwick. Move forward. It is what you need and what Ryan wants most now. Trust me.”

“I do.” He was surprised to find that he truly did.

“Good. There you are,” she secured gauze around his wrist, “Good as new. Why don’t you go to Ryan now? I’m sure you have a lot to talk about.”

Chad was surprised how very shy he felt as he walked back to Ryan’s room and waited in the doorway as Troy and Sharpay watched over the vampire he had fallen in love with. He was glad his mind wasn’t even pausing at the word anymore as he observed Ryan and his sister. He was able to sit up by himself now and was holding the goblet on his own, though Sharpay was still hovering anxiously. Troy was just standing a little distant from the bed, his arms crossed, a satisfied smirk on his face. All three of them turned to look at him at the same time and he couldn’t help that his breath hitched in surprise. How hard must it be for them to appear human? He had never suspected until that night that they were anything other than human but he couldn’t believe now that he hadn’t seen it. Just turning to look at him there was more grace and speed than any human could ever possess. When Troy and Sharpay made to exit the room they looked more like they were floating, not walking. And when Ryan held out a hand to beckon him into the room it was like he was moving through water. Chad stumbled into the room and onto the bed, taking Ryan’s mouth in a hot kiss before he could control himself. He felt Ryan smile against his lips and deepened the kiss, laying them both down.

“You’re so beautiful,” he panted when the need for air in his lungs overwhelmed his need to have his tongue down Ryan’s throat, “Ryan, I’m so sorry. So sorry. Jesus, I could have lost you. Jesus.”

“Chad,” Ryan murmured, placing gentle, chaste kisses to Chad’s neck, “Chad, it’s
okay.” Chad was trembling in his arms. Ryan stroked his back gently, feeling so much love for Chad in that moment it overwhelmed him.

“We’re a pair, aren’t we?” he asked quietly.

“Pair of wimps,” Chad murmured, sitting up and wiping the couple of tears he had allowed to slip from his eyes away with a smile, “I haven’t cried in years. Seems stupid. You’re here. You’re fine.”

“Sometimes humans need the emotional release,” Ryan ran a hand over Chad’s loose, wild hair, “I can’t cry.”

“Really?”

“Not a tear in two hundred and thirty-three years.”

“Will you tell me about your life, Ryan?” Chad sat up and leaned against the headboard, wrapping his arms around Ryan and pulling him close so that Ryan’s head rested just over his heart, “Gabriella told me to ask you.”

“What do you want to know?”

“Everything. I want to know everything about you. About before you were turned, after you were turned, the whole sun thing. How does that work? And when we would go out to eat, where did you put the food? Crosses, holy water, mirrors, being invited in, everything.”

“One question at a time, Chad,” Ryan laughed, “I’ll tell you whatever you want to know, but be forewarned, it could take a while.”

“I have nowhere I’d rather be,” Chad whispered in his ear and placed a kiss to his hair. It made Ryan smile.

“Neither have I,” He admitted, then paused to get his thoughts in order and began, “I was born in the year of our lord seventeen hundred and fifty-five…”

Author’s Note: The next couple of chapters will be dealing with Ryan’s life before and after being turned which means more will be revealed on how Sharpay met Troy and Gabriella as well. Just wanted to give the warning that there won’t be much Ryan/Chad in the next couple of chapters but I hope you enjoy them anyway. Should be up in the next couple of days! Thanks for reading! T.H.