The Furtrix

OK, here's a lemon that's a joint collaboration between myself and my very good friend Ben Cooper (yes, I'm NOT a credit whore!). In case you haven't worked it out, it's a lemon parody of The Matrix. Instead of Keanu Reeves playing the hero, it's everyone's favourite doggy Brandy! Many, MANY thanks to Ben Cooper for lots of the ideas that made this lemon possible.

Here's the full cast list:

(names in brackets are hacking aliases)

Neo - Brandy (Diva)
Morpheus - Me (Kesh)
Trinity – Billie
Apoc - Ben (Cooper)
Switch – Shandy
Cypher - Pokeinfo from School Days
Tank - Ed from School Days
Dozer – Whiskers
Mouse - Edna from School Days

All characters and names used are trademarks of their respective owners.

The Matrix (c) Warner Brothers
Brandy and Mr Whiskers (c) Disney
ZigZag and Double Z Studios (c) Max Black Rabbit
Pokeinfo, Edna and Ed (c) PALcomix team (www.palcomix.com)
Billie Warner and Cooper (c) Ben Cooper
Shandy (c) Keshihead
Tails (c) Sega
Sally Acorn (c) Dic/Archie Comics


THE FURTRIX
BY KESHIHEAD

A blank screen appears with a flashing green cursor. A ringing phone sound can be heard.
Call trans opt: received. 11-1-05 13:24:18 REC:log>
"Yeah?" asked a man's voice
"Is everything in place?" asked a female voice.
"You weren't supposed to relieve me" said the male.
Trace program: running
"I know, but I felt like taking a shift" said the female.
We now see the screen filled with numbers.
"You like her, don'tcha? You like watching her" said the male.
5
"Don't be ridiculous," said the female "I'm no perv!"
"We're gonna kill her. Understand?" said the male.
5 5
"Kesh believes she is The One" said the female.
555
"Do you?" asked the male.
"It doesn't matter what I believe" replied the female.
555 6
"You don't, do you?" asked the male.
"Did you hear that?" asked the female.
"Hear what?" replies the male.
"Are you sure this line is clean?" asked the female.
555 6 0
"Yeah, of course I'm sure" replied the male.
555 690
"I'd better go" said the female.
5550690
We pass through the 0, and see a policeman holding a pistol and a torch. He nodded. Several more officers walked cautiously down a corridor, and stopped at a door. One of them kicked it down, and they saw a dog-girl with black hair with white highlights, dressed in black leather, sat at a table.
"FREEZE! POLICE!" shouted an officer.
"Paws on your head!" shouted a second, with his gun drawn "Do it! Do it now!"
We now see the dog-girl from the front, and she slowly raised her paws. Meanwhile, outside of the hotel, called the 'Heart O' The City Hotel', there were lots of police cars parked outside. A black car drove up and three Siamese cats in black suits, wearing black shades, stepped out. One was different from the others, by a white patch over his left eye.
"Lieutenant" said the smart-dressed cat with the white patch.
"Oh, shit" said the lieutenant, hanging his head.
"Lieutenant, you were given specific orders" said the smart-dressed cat.
"Hey, I'm just doing my job, OK?" said the lieutenant "You give me that 'juris-my-dick-tion' crap, you can cram it up your ass"
"The orders were for your protection" said the smart-dressed cat.
"I think we can handle one little doggy girl" laughs the lieutenant as the smart-dressed cats walk away "I sent two units. They're bringing her down now"
"No, Lieutenant" said the smart-dressed cat "Your men are already dead"
We cut back to the dog-girl, and she had her paws behind her head. An officer is about to handcuff her. Just as he was about to place the cuffs on her, she grabbed his right arm, and broke it over her other arm. She then leapt up into the air, and hovered for a few seconds before kicking him into another officer and they both go crashing through the wall. She kicked the chair at another officer, while another fired his gun at her. She athletically ran along the wall, then grabbed his gun arm, and fired his gun at another officer, then kicked the officer she grabbed.
"Shit" she said to herself as more officers and the smart-dressed cats entered the hotel. She took her mobile phone out of her jacket and dialed a number "Kesh, the line was traced. I don't know how"
"Yeah, I know," said Kesh "They cut the hard line. There's no time, Billie. You're gonna have to get to another exit"
"Any agents?" asked Billie.
"Yes" replied Kesh with a sigh.
"Gawddamnit" hissed Billie.
"You have to focus, Billie. There's a phone at Wells and Lake. You can make it" said Kesh.
"Alright," sighed Billie "I'll try"
"Go" said Kesh.
As she left the room, she saw the agents arrive in an elevator, so she ran the other way down the corridor, and the agents give chase. She ran out to a balcony, and saw another agent. She climbed up a ladder onto the roof, with an agent and police officers in hot pursuit. She leapt over a small gap, which the agent had no trouble clearing, but some of the officers had difficulty. Billie ran across some angled roofs, but the agent and officers were still hot on her trail. When she ran off the last roof, the agent pulled out his pistol and fired on her. Picking up speed, she launched herself over a very wide gap, over a busy street and cleared it, rolling as she landed. The agent followed her, and the officers looked on in amazement.
"That's impossible" said one of them.
Billie ducked behind a wall as the agent landed, his gun drawn. She panted as she looked for a way out, and she spotted a small window. She ran as fast as she could, and launched herself forwards, her paws outstretched. She punched through the window and rolled down a set of stairs, drawing her twin 9mm pistols, expecting the agent to follow her. Nothing.
"Get up, Billie" she said to herself "Just get up. Get up!"
She rolled to the side and ran down a narrow street, and spotted a phone box. A garbage truck screeched as it turned, pointing itself at the phone box. All of a sudden, the phone rang. The garbage truck's tyres screeched as it revved up, and Billie ran for the phone box. She made it to the phone, and she had a cut above her left eye. With the earpiece to her ear, she placed her paw on the glass as the truck neared. Eventually, the truck smashed into the phone box, and through the wall behind it. It backed away, and the agent driving it stepped out to inspect the damage. There was nothing but rubble, and no body. A second agent joined him.
"She got out" he said.
"It doesn't matter" said the first agent as a third joined them.
"The informant is real" said the third "We have the name of the next target"
"The name is Diva" said the second agent.
"We'll need a search running" said the first agent.
"It has already begun" said the third agent.
We move towards the earpiece of the phone, and come to a computer with 'Searching' on it. As the search runs, we see a tan-furred dog-girl with blonde hair, ears and tail asleep on her bed, in a white t-shirt and panties, listening to music. All of a sudden, her screen turned blank, and words appeared.
'Wake up, Diva...'
She slowly opened her eyes and blinked a few times. Her eyes then turned to the computer. Seeing the words, she raised her head, then her whole body.
"What?" she said to herself, as she took off her headphones. Slowly, but surely, more words appeared.
'The Furtrix has you...'
"What the hell?" she asked, then looked around the room. She tried to press Ctrl and X on her keyboard, but nothing happened.
'Follow the yiffy rabbits.'
"Follow the yiffy rabbits?" she said to herself.
She tapped the Esc key a few times, but still nothing happened. Just as she tried to work out what the message meant, the screen showed 'Knock, knock, Diva.' and there was a knock at her door.
"Who is it?" she asked.
"It's Choi" came the reply.
Diva continued to look at her screen, but there was nothing there. She opened her door, and saw a group of four furries stood waiting.
"You're two hours late" said Diva.
"I know," said Choi, a brown male cat "It's her fault"
"You got the money?" asked Diva.
Choi reached into his jacket and pulled out a large wad of banknotes.
"Two grand" said Choi.
"Hold on" said Diva as she closed her door.
She opened a book on one of her shelves, and pulled out a small disc. She opened up the door, and handed the disc to Choi.
"Hallelujah!" he exclaimed "You're my saviour, girl. My own personal Lady Godiva. I wonder what yiffy adventures you have lined up for Brandy and Whiskers this time!"
"If you get caught reading those..." started Diva.
"Yeah, I know. This never happened. You don't exist" said Choi "Something wrong, girl? You look a little whiter than usual"
"My computer, it..." started Diva "Ever have that feeling where you're not sure if you're awake or still dreaming?"
"Hmm, all the time" said Choi, nodding slowly "It's called mescaline. It's the only way to fly. Hey, it sounds to me like you need to unplug, girl. Get some R&R"
He turned to the bunny-girl on his arm.
"Whaddya think, Dujour? Should we take her with us?" he asked.
"Definitely" said Dujour with a smile.
"Sorry, I can't" said Diva "I have work tomorrow"
"C'mon, it'll be fun. I promise" said Dujour, as she put her arm around Choi.
Just as Diva was about to refuse, she spotted a tattoo on Dujour's shoulder of two rabbits yiffing.
"Yeah. Sure. I'll go" she said.
We're now at a nightclub. Lots of furries were dancing and having a great time. Diva was stood on her own by the bar, drinking a Smirnoff Ice. She looked out of the corner of her eye, and saw a dog-girl with black and white fur and white highlights walking up to her.
"Hello, Diva" said the dog-girl.
"How do you know that name?" asked Diva.
"I know a lot about you" replied the dog-girl "Your cousin Shandy speaks highly of you, and I must say, those lemons you write are pretty good! I like the one where Brandy gets her own back on Whiskers for what he did to her. 'Brandy's Nightmare Part 3', I think it's called"
"Who are you?" asked Diva, taking a sip of her drink "And how do you know my cousin?"
"My name is Billie" said Billie, making Diva almost choke on her drink in surprise!
"Billie? THE Billie?" asked Diva "Who cracked the IRSD base? Whoa!"
"What?" asked Billie.
"I just thought...you were a guy" said Diva.
"Most bitches do" replied Billie.
"That was you on my computer?" asked Diva "How did you do that?"
"Right now, all I can tell you...is that you're in danger, Diva" replied Billie "I brought you here to warn you"
"Of what?" asked Diva.
"They're watching you, Diva" said Billie.
"Who is?" asked Diva.
"Just listen, please" said Billie "Let's go down to the dancefloor, and I'll tell you more. We're gonna have to put on a cover. Put your arm around my waist and act seductive. Pretend I'm your girlfriend"
Diva shook her head in refusal.
"No way!" she said.
"Look, just do it" hissed Billie "I don't like it any more than you do, but I don't have time to argue. Just pretend I'm who you thought I was"
Diva sighed and put her arm around Billie's waist as they both moved to the dancefloor. She allowed Billie to walk behind her, and perform some sexy dance moves on her in time with the music. While Billie's paws caressed Diva's hips and stomach, she spoke in Diva's ear.
"I know why you're here, and I know why, night after night, you sit at your computer" said Billie as she allowed Diva to walk behind her and perform the same moves on her "You're looking for him. I know because I was once looking for the same thing. And when he found me...he told me I wasn't really looking for him...I was looking for an answer. It's the question that drives us, Diva. It's the question that brought you here. You know the question...just as I did"
"What is The Furtrix?" answered Diva as she turned Billie round, so they were facing each other.
They placed their arms across each other's backs and moved in time with the music.
"Well, actually, I was thinking more 'Why is your paw crossing the border into No Woman's Land!?'" growled Billie as Diva realised she was caressing Billie's left ass cheek.
"Oops, sorry. I was just imagining you the way I thought you were, and I guess I got carried away" replied Diva, as she sheepishly grinned and blushed.
"How...flattering" hissed Billie sarcastically, through gritted teeth "Can't you keep your libido under control for FIVE FUCKING MINUTES?!?! Geez!" she snarled, wondering if she should've delegated this mission to someone else, seeing as the bitch who was potentially the saviour of the entire furry race was now squeezing her ass like a melon in a supermarket "As for your question...the answer is out there, Diva. And it will find you...if you want it to" she finished with a sigh.
"Oh, wooow..." replied Diva in a daze.
"You're doing it again, aren't you!?" hissed Billie, thinking that Diva was still daydreaming about dancing with whatever hunk she thought she was.
"Um...no...of course not" Diva sheepishly replied.
"You're a terrible liar, you know that?" said Billie, raising her paw and flicking Diva on her forehead in a sibling rivalry-type manner.
"Oww!"
Diva stirred in her bed to the sound of her alarm clock. She yanked on the cord to hit the snooze button, pulling it off the shelf above her head. She awoke as it hit her square on the forehead.
"Ouch!" she cried as she sat up in her bed and rubbed the bruise "That bitch sure gives a good thumpin'"
She looked at the clock and it read 9:18.
"Shit, I'm late for work! Miss Zag's gonna be SO pissed!" she cried.
She hurriedly ran into the offices of Double Z Studios, where she worked, dressed in a pink t-shirt and a short frilly skirt.
Brandy was stood in ZigZag's office. Outside, two window cleaners were cleaning the windows.
"I think you have a problem with authority, Brandy" said ZigZag, a black and white tiger-striped skunk with white hair "You think that the rules somehow don't apply to you. You think you can just swan in here whenever you feel like it. Well, I'm afraid you're sadly mistaken"
"I'm really sorry, ma'am" said Brandy "I swear it won't happen again"
"It better not happen again, Brandy" said ZigZag "This is the third time in a month. You're setting a bad example for the other employees. Now, either you choose to be here on time in future, or you find yourself another job, is that clear?"
"Crystal clear, ma'am" said Brandy.
"Good. Now, what shall I do with you about your tardiness?" asked ZigZag to herself "Come with me"
She led Brandy through the various sets for films, until they arrived at a dominatrix's dungeon. ZigZag took a rope that hung on the wall.
"Get over that table" she commanded.
"Why?" asked Brandy, timidly.
"Don't argue with me, Brandy, or I'll fire your ass right now!" shouted ZigZag "Now do as you're told and get over that table"
Brandy did as she was told, and ZigZag tied her paws around the front two legs of the table, and her ankles around the back two legs, so Brandy was totally helpless.
"Since you seem to LIKE setting a bad example for everyone, I'm gonna show everyone what will happen to those who cross the line one too many times while I'M in charge" said ZigZag as she walked over to a video camera and set it to record.
"What are you doing?" asked Brandy.
"I'm going to make you repent, Brandy" replied ZigZag "Now, let the punishment begin"
She walked behind Brandy and lifted her skirt, revealing her panties. The words 'KISS THIS' were written across her backside.
"Hmm, such a bold statement from a primadonna like you" said ZigZag "I'll do something with your ass, all right, but I'm not gonna kiss it"
"W-W-What ARE you going to do?" asked Brandy as she turned her head to see what was going on.
ZigZag raised her paw, and brought it down on Brandy's left ass cheek with a hard smack.
"AAAIII!" cried Brandy in pain.
"QUIET!" hissed ZigZag "You're NOT to make another sound until I'm done with you. With the amount of punishment I have in store for you, that's going to be a while"
"But, ma'am..." started Brandy, but she was cut off by another hard slap on her ass.
"OW!" she cried as another surge of pain shot through her body.
"I said QUIET, Brandy!" warned ZigZag "Unless you want me to do something FAR worse to you. I'm going to discipline you, even if it means I have to beat it into you!"
"PLEASE, SOMEONE!!! HELP ME!!!" cried Brandy, hoping to attract the attention of anyone nearby.
"I suggest you keep your voice down, Brandy" warned ZigZag "Who's going to be in more trouble if someone were to walk in here? Bear in mind that YOU'RE the one who's semi-naked and vulnerable"
Brandy felt her face flush with embarrassment.
"But this is sexual harassment!" wailed Brandy.
"True, but I could just say that we're making another movie. Can't you see the camera?" said ZigZag as she continued to spank Brandy as hard as she could "You were one of my favourite workers, Brandy, but now, you're crashing and burning with your poor punctuality. I hope this will set you straight!"
Each slap brought Brandy closer and closer to tears. Eventually, the pain was too much for her. Tears streamed down her face, and she began to wail.
"Please, no more!" sobbed Brandy "It really hurts"
"Brandy, when are you going to get it through your THICK skull?" asked ZigZag "You've been a bad girl, a VERY bad girl. If you're going to be late for work, then you should be prepared to suffer the consequences. Hmm, I don't think you've got the message yet. Time to kick things up a notch"
She walked over to a rack on the wall and picked up a ping-pong bat while Brandy whimpered, her ass cheeks burning hot from the spanking.
"Yes, this should do nicely" said ZigZag.
Brandy froze in terror, then let out another shrill scream as an even stingier pain shot through her body as ZigZag brought the bat down on her rump. She spanked her several more times, ignoring the screams of pain coming from Brandy.
"AAAGGGHHH!!!" cried Brandy "Please, ma'am, no more, NO MORE!!!"
"Nope, I still don't think this is working" said ZigZag.
"Please stop! I'm begging you!" cried Brandy "My bottom really hurts!"
"It's because of these panties that you're not repenting!" hissed ZigZag.
Brandy couldn't believe what was happening to her, but that was nothing compared to the shock she got when ZigZag placed a paw on her panties and pulled them down, exposing her pussy slit and tailhole. She was also aware that the doors to the studio were unlocked, and ANYONE could walk in at any moment. Worse still, the whole thing was being FILMED. ZigZag spent a moment or two rubbing Brandy's sore bottom, with her cheeks a nice hint of red, while Brandy sniffed and whimpered.
"Oh, you have such a cute ass, Brandy" said ZigZag "And such a lovely colour"
As her gaze moved to Brandy's exposed pussy, she could see it glistening with her juices under the studio lights. She wondered if Brandy was getting turned on by her punishment. SHE sure was.
"THIS should drive the message home, Brandy" said ZigZag as she spanked her bare bottom with the ping-pong bat.
Every so often, she would pause her paddling to soothe Brandy's sore behind. Also, she would run her middle finger over Brandy's slit, collecting her juices, then bringing her paw up to her muzzle, where she licked and sucked her finger clean.
"Mmm, delicious" sighed ZigZag "I think a girl's juices taste SO much nicer when she's in a blind panic, wouldn't you agree?"
Brandy felt a mixture of humiliation and arousal, with her cheeks turning slightly pink. To counteract the pain she had caused Brandy, ZigZag began to rub the handle of the bat against her slit, making Brandy gasp and moan.
"Oh, you can't handle the spanking, yet you can take this quite well, huh?" said ZigZag "OK, I'll do this with you for a while"
She continued to rub the handle of the bat against Brandy's pussy, then gently eased it inside her. The pleasurable feeling of the handle in her pussy more than cancelled out the throbbing pain of her sore backside.
"Yeah, you like that, huh?" cooed ZigZag as she began to move the handle in and out of Brandy's snatch.
"Yes, ma'am" sighed Brandy "Please, more!"
"Oh, when I'm spanking you, it's 'Oh, please stop!' but when I'm doing something you DO like, it's 'Please, more'. You're not learning, Brandy!" said ZigZag "You HAVE to learn to take the bad with the good. It's like dark and light, black and white. You can't have one without the other. Is it sinking in yet?"
"Yes, ma'am" said Brandy.
"Now, let's see what else I can do with that cute little puppy hole of yours" said ZigZag as she picked up a large dildo from the wall, leaving the ping-pong bat sticking out of Brandy's pussy. She began to squirm by rubbing her thighs together. ZigZag returned and noticed her.
"HEY! You're trying to get off on it, aren't you?" she snapped "Bad dog! How are you supposed to learn discipline if you're going to be a naughty doggy?"
She pulled the bat out of Brandy's slit and replaced it with the dildo.
"Let's see you get off on THIS!" said ZigZag as she took hold of the control and put it on a low setting to start.
The dildo began to whirr and rotate inside Brandy, making her moan again.
"No, that's too tame for you" said ZigZag, so she turned it up to a medium setting, turning Brandy's moans into loud cries.
"Yeah, the widdle doggy wuvs the big toy up her puppy hole, doesn't she?" cooed ZigZag in a patronising voice.
"Oh, yes, ma'am!" cried Brandy "Oh, I'm gonna go crazy!"
"Aww, does she wanna cum?" asked ZigZag "Well, here. Let me help with that"
She turned the dildo up to the highest setting, making Brandy scream out in pain.
"NO, STOP!!! IT'S TOO FAST!!!" screamed Brandy "IT HURTS!!! IT REALLY HURTS!!!"
"This is what you get for being such a naughty pup" said ZigZag "Maybe now you'll come to work on time so you don't have to go through this again, won't you?"
"YES, MA'AM!!!" cried Brandy "I'LL BE A GOOD GIRL FROM NOW ON, I PROMISE!!! PLEASE, JUST TURN IT OFF!!!"
"I think you've learned your lesson" said ZigZag, so she turned the dildo off, and removed it from her pussy "I'm just gonna give you one last spanking, then you can go back to work, OK?"
"OK, ma'am" whimpered Brandy.
ZigZag went back over to the wall and picked up a leather paddle, studded with rounded metal spikes. She slapped it against her paw a few times, making Brandy tremble with fright and a gasp of fear escaped from her lips.
"Five slaps on each cheek should do it, I think" said ZigZag with a sneer as she raised the paddle and brought it down on Brandy's left cheek with a very hard slap.
When it was all over, Brandy was sat in her cubicle on a cushion tied around her waist to protect her tanned hide. On her desk were a jar of Vaseline and a bottle of disinfectant. Just then, a FurEx employee approached her.
"Erm, Brandy Harrington?" asked the FurEx guy.
"Yeah, that's me" said Brandy. The FurEx guy handed her a parcel and asked her to sign for it. He noticed the Vaseline and disinfectant on her desk. Brandy met his gaze.
"Late for work again, huh?" he asked.
"Mmm-hmm" whimpered Brandy, her head nodding slowly, then winced in pain as the nerve endings on her backside screamed out in agony "Owie, owie, owie!"
"Yeah, I see it all the time. Have a nice day" said the FurEx guy.
Brandy opened the parcel and inside was a mobile phone. All of a sudden, it rang. She answered it.
"Hello?" she asked.
"Hello, Diva" said a male voice on the other end "Do you know who this is?"
"Kesh?" asked Brandy.
"Yes" replied Kesh "I've been looking for you, Diva. I'm not sure if you're ready to see what I want to show you, but unfortunately, we've both run out of time. They're coming for you, and I have no idea what they're gonna do to you if they catch you"
"Who's coming for me?" asked Diva.
"Take a look for yourself" said Kesh.
Diva peered over her cubicle and saw three cat-agents asking a fellow employee where to find her.
"Oh, shit!" hissed Diva as she crouched back behind her desk "What do they want with me?"
"I don't know, but if you don't wanna find out, I suggest you get out of there quickly" said Kesh "I can guide you, but you HAVE to do what I tell you, OK?"
"OK" replied Diva.
"The cubicle next to you is empty. When I tell you, go to it" said Kesh "Oh, and try to stay off your ass. I know how...tender it is"
"Huh?" asked Diva "How did you...?"
"I saw the whole thing" said Kesh.
"You were WATCHING ME?!?!" hissed Diva "You perv!"
"Hey, I didn't enjoy it! Look, just focus on the task at hand" said Kesh "Go, Diva"
Diva ducked into the empty cubicle, JUST as the three cat-agents rounded the corner to her cubicle.
"Stay here for a moment" said Kesh.
After a few moments, the cat-agents went away.
"Right, I want you to stay as low as you can, and take an elevator to the roof. You should be safe there" said Kesh "DO NOT let anyone see you"
"OK, Kesh" said Diva, so she kept as low as she could and skulked her way to a nearby elevator. She got inside and hammered the button for the roof as fast as she could. Just as the doors closed, an agent saw her.
"There she is!" he shouted.
The three cat-agents watched for the floor where Diva got off, and rode the elevator next to it to chase her. When Diva got onto the roof, she held the phone to her ear.
"SHIT! They saw me. Now what?" she asked.
"Find somewhere to hide and stay there" said Kesh "And just pray they don't find you"
With that, he hung up. Diva ducked behind a small doorway, and kept as quiet as she could. Meanwhile, the group of agents got on the roof, and split up to search for her. It didn't take them long to find her by her repeated whimpering of 'owie, owie, owie'. She was taken out of the building and put into a police car.
"HEY! Mind my ass!" shouted Diva "It's still sore!"
In front of the car, Billie was on a motorbike, watching the agents push Diva's head down into the car in her rear-view mirror.
"Ah, nuts! I KNEW she couldn't do it!" said Billie as she rode off.