Cruel

Author Note: I remember writing this in a very negative mood, hence the reason why I torment the poor little liebchen. Sorry, mate.
...


How could fate be so cruel to Michael?
Here he was, stuck in a dank, sticking sewer, with no one to help him as he sat alone and in a body he did not recognize. Viktor was dead, but so was Selene. Life had been made difficult enough when he had been bitten by Lucian, but now his one chance of survival was killed before his eyes, the beautiful creature he had only known for a few days who had given a wordless oath to protect him.
Staring at some peeling wall paper, Michael Corvin sat alone, contemplating his fate. Bitten by a lycan, he was fated to become one himself. Born of the Corvinus family, he became something more when Selene bit him herself.
Selene. God, what a beautiful thing she was. Beautiful, but lacking in vision. Her only view was that of Viktor’s in the end, and her love of him caused her death. The bastard may have been strong in mind and body, but Michael had been made stronger, and despite his lack of experience, he felled the great elder in a heartbeat as his back was turned. Several lycans were only five minutes walk away, taking pleasure in devouring the dead bodies.
Lucian offered Selene’s body to be buried or burned, but Michael dismissed her as nothing to him. At least not anymore. He did not need her any longer had she lived anyway.
But the hybrid was angry. His situation frustrated him. The living quarters were far from satisfactory, and at least if he were with Selene, he could get a good fuck once in a while, no matter where they were. Now he was stuck with a lycan pack, not even fully a lycan anymore. None of them realized his capabilities as a hybrid, and he was stuck with them as though a college graduate among preschoolers. Lucian was kind, but what good did that bring for a leader during a war?
Michael still remembered the lycan leader’s memories as though they were from yesterday. He could see Sonja clearly behind closed eyelids, smell her charred flesh, rather similar to how he expected Selene would have smelt had they incinerated her remains. Anger boiled within him that was not his, but Lucian’s, for the elder who now sat in the satisfied stomachs of several lycan soldiers. Emotions he had never expected from the stoic alpha male washed over his being, hate, anger, happiness, sorrow…
Love.
Not just for the vampire Lucian saw executed right before his gray eyes, no, not at all. Michael Corvin could awake in a cold sweat, his nerves accelerated from passionate dreams of making love to another lycan soldier. Not even a female. He envisioned the trembling, skinny body of another man, chest heaving, sweat escaping, with skinny fingers causing flames to span across an equally quaking form. Michael dreamt often of either a golden haired nymph with electric blue eyes, or a rail-thin, studious creature, with heavy lidded eyes and a pug nose.
Singe.
Christ, that fucker creeped him out.
Why him, of all people, for Lucian to take to bed? Such a startling contrast, first of all from Sonja, a young ravishing woman the hybrid would have eagerly plugged in a second. Why that freakish, nerdy… thing?
Other nights Michael would dream of the first time Lucian and Singe had met. Lucian had been looking for a scientist to help unlock the key to hybrids, but soon that friendship became one of love. It hardly made sense.
What a couple of faggots.
Michael could have lead this army a thousand times better than Lucian! If he was pack leader, they certainly would have a better hiding place, and they would not have to worry about the remaining vampire elder, Marcus… Michael’s own ancestor.
Perhaps then Selene would be alive, and Kraven, that traitor of both lycan and vampire would be a mere stain on the floor. The hybrid considered how delicious the regent’s guts would have tasted, and he gave a bitter laugh at how eager he was to now be an immortal flesh eater.
It was then that Michael realized how much he disliked this army. He would be dead before he joined the side of the vampires, but even the lycans were hardly an improvement. The hybrid was only on one side: his own. Lucian may have been a hybrid now as well, but the way things were going, the change hardly made any difference. The young man frowned at the thought of being led into some sort of mission that he may never survive, all because of the alpha’s error and compassion. Michael had to look out for himself. If only he could somehow get away from the war…
*
“I notice you had no qualms of killing Viktor,” Lucian pointed out as he and Michael shared a drink. The leader’s living quarters also included the briefing room, and they sat at a modest table, several reports and notes from Singe’s studies splayed out for examination.
“Course not,” Michael replied without pause. “He killed Selene… and I was actually rather fond of her. I didn’t appreciate his gratitude for her years of service under his rule.”
Lucian have a small snicker, giving more of a grimace than a smile. “Viktor was never the compassionate sort, not even when I was a slave.”
Michael smiled wickedly. “He deserved what he got anyway.”
Lucian raised his eyebrows. “Oh? How eager you are to assume the worst in him.”
“I know just from your memories how awful a person he was. What he did to you was awful.”
The lycan elder’s gaze was averted for a moment and Lucian appeared lost in thought.
“Does it bother you that I mentioned it?” the young man asked, trying to sound genuinely sympathetic.
“Sometimes it still does…” his sire admitted somberly. “The years have made me bitter towards Viktor, but time has also been a great healer. I found ways to deal with grief… and I learned how to love again.”
“With Singe?”
“Ah… your blood memories serve you well.” Lucian stood and put the bottle of wine away. Turning towards the fellow hybrid, he gave a calm smile. “Yes, he has helped me through the years, in more ways than one.”
“Do you love him?”
Lucian stared at the young man. “Wouldn’t you be able to guess from my memories?”
“Oh I don’t know…” Michael lifted an eyebrow. “I thought at first you loved Sonja. She’s the reason this war happened, right? Seems weird to me that you go running around with your scientist when this war is carried out in your late wife’s name, that’s all…”
Lucian frowned for a moment, and faced the man fully. “Do you presume to question my resolve in the subject of this war… one that has been carried out for centuries?” His mood had altered completely. Perfect, Michael thought, suppressing a smile of confidence.
“So, is this thing you do with Singe just physical?”
Lucian’s eyes widened for a second and he advanced toward this man who challenged him. “I would be more careful, if I were you.”
“Is it? Who do you love? Singe or Sonja??”
Lucian’s hand balled into a fist. At any moment, he could transform into his own imagining of a hybrid and tear Michael limb from limb, but he hesitated.
“I’ve had too much wine…” he said, turning away. This was confusing his alcohol addled brain, and too much had happened within the week, doubled with the fact that he had not accurately slept in that amount of time either.
Michael stood, trying to put his best sympathetic expression forward. “It’s just confusing, that’s all, Lucian. I keep seeing different images in my head, and I don’t know what to think. One minute it’s you and Sonja, the next it’s you and Singe… I see you looking at him with the same feeling that you felt towards your wife. And a lot of the time I see you comforting Singe… it’s never the other way around… like it was with Sonja.”
Lucian froze momentarily at the thought.
“It’s seems unfair,” Michael continued, approaching his leader’s back. “You always have to be the stronger one with Singe. Even when you were with Sonja, you helped one another…”
“You’re wrong. Singe helped me in his own way.”
“You mean besides searching for someone in the Corvinus family?”
“Exactly. He’s more than just a soldier here.”
“He’s not even that, if you think about it…” Michael stated carefully. “He’s still the bookish chemist you met over a hundred years ago. Now that you’ve fulfilled his hopes of finding the ultimate weapon against the vampires with both you and I, how do you think he’d view you? All he’ll end up talking about is how your new anatomy works, your new abilities…”
He did not get any further when Lucian wheeled around and punched him in the face. Flying back several feet, Michael landed on his back against the table. Instantly, the leader was upon him, fury marring his visage, eyes ink black like that of a true hybrid.
He hesitated taking any further rage out on the young man. He could not kill him, not when he was helpful to their cause… and not when he was staring up at the alpha with the same pitch colored eyes.
“I wouldn’t treat you like a science experiment, Lucian,” Michael said, his eyes reverting to a human blue. “You and I are the only hybrids in the world. I wouldn’t treat you differently.” Cautiously, he reached up to touch his sire’s face.
Staring in surprise and confusion, Lucian realized the gestured put forth to him and reeled back, stepping away in shock. If he were sober, he could walk away and clear his head of troubling thoughts, not just stand stuck in his spot and continue to have strange urges about his new pack mate, who was so young looking and pretty.
A gentle hand alighted his shoulder and he turned around, face within inches of that of Michael Corvin.
“It’s okay…” Michael whispered. “I know how you feel. This is confusing for me too… but it’s nice to know there’s someone else around here who feels the same way.” The hand moved to feel brown stubble and Lucian found himself enjoying the sensation as he continued to stare at the boy’s long, dusty gold hair. The two hybrids stood still, gazing at one another for an agonizing minute, the leader paralyzed.
*
Singe found himself missing Lucian after hours of not seeing him. He did not care that Morrigan insisted he stay in bed until he was fully healed from the wounds he sustained from Viktor. She worried too much, and he knew he was fine now that he was with Lucian again, now that he was home. Currently the scientist wanted to talk to his sire and lover, and explain what had happened when he was apprehended by Selene and interrogated. If he could just apologize, explain what he went through in trying to keep the lycans’ secrets. Granted, now that Viktor and Selene were dead and Kraven was disgraced, the revelation hardly mattered, but the scientist desperately wanted to know that everything could be alright again. Eager and anxious, he wandered down the corridor, heading for the briefing room.
He stopped when his lycan hearing picked up a peculiar sound. A breathy sound, harsh at first, but then soothing, deep. It sounded disturbing to Singe, and he soundlessly accosted the doorway to the briefing room. A fuzzy silhouette against thick hanging insulation strips, he peered through a small crack in the partitions of plastic.
He had to be imagining things, and he blinked twice in response to the first glance. Singe soon realized he was not dreaming or imagining the sight before him, for a tightness became apparent in his chest, right where his heart should be. Standing at the center of the room were the two hybrids. Lucian’s back was facing the doorway, but the Austrian scientist could clearly see Michael’s face, and it held such disgusting, faux-innocent lust as it peered at Lucian.
Singe’s large eyes widened at the sight, wringing his bony hands as he witnessed the smile forming on Michael’s face, totally shorn of all innocence. God, he hated how close the two hybrids were and his tightening heart beat furiously in his ribs as he refused to tear his gaze away. His grip tightened at the sight of Michael closing the space between the two men, slowly, deliberately. Michael’s cheek caressed his leader’s neck, and he whispered something into Lucian’s ear:
“We need each other.”
Lucian still had not moved, and Singe looked aside, away from the display. He only realized he was crying when he felt tears hitting his hands, and he could hardly be amazed at his control, restraining himself to the point of barely making a sound, despite being fifteen feet away from his lover.
His lover.
Oh god, Lucian… how could you?
When he looked up again, his heart was submerged in ice water. Michael was looking right at him, and grinning wickedly, the stupid little prick. What did that child think he was doing? And how dare he even try it!
But Lucian did not resist as the fellow hybrid kissed his neck, then his cheek, and nuzzled into his bearded face.
Singe could hardly observe now. His vision, already blurred by tears flowing down his face, blackened momentarily, but he could still hear the sounds of passion, smell the stink of arousal, coming from both men, one of which he thought loved him. He could almost hear Michael laughing, but he realized he had been imagining it. Michael was probably laughing inside anyway, the god damn whore.
He could not bear to see anymore. Hardly breathing, he turned and left.
Why did this happen? Singe thought that Lucian loved him! Was it his fault? Did he do something wrong? All those years, the scientist thought he had finally found love, after a lifetime of heartbreak, pain, and disappointment.
Of course. Lucian did not care about him after all. Everyone else had lied to him and hurt him in the past anyway. Singe had just been too stupid and infantile to see that he was just being humored. The lycan army only needed him as a scientist anyway, and now that Michael and Lucian were hybrids, his work seemed to be complete.
Stumbling, Singe fell forward into a puddle, and struggled to get back up. He could not face Lucian now, not after what he had seen. Even here, he was not welcome, not when he was a coward who revealed everything to the vampires under the torment of a mere bullet wound. The Austrian was not a true member of the pack when all he was good for was his mind, and that did not seem to help in the end anyway. He could not even see that Lucian did not love him all along. Lucian probably only humored him to keep him in the pack, and make sure his naïve ways did not get him killed or inspire him to run away.
He was sobbing now, and he was oblivious to the other lycans who were now staring at him, soaking wet, weeping openly, and staggering about like a madman. Singe no longer cared. All the times Lucian said he loved him… it was not real, just a comfortable lie, something to take his mind off the agonies of the past.
Oh god… oh god, Lucian… I think I really loved you.
What else could it be but love tearing his heart from his breast as he wandered about, half blind and ready to throw up? What else but love could make him feel as though he might die?
I thought you loved me. Why don’t you love me?
Countless other thoughts danced about cruelly in Singe’s mind and he soon found a dark, quiet place to finally collapse. His body seemed to break like a china doll, and the same could be said for his mind, as he went limp on the cold, unsanitary floor. He was all alone anyway, with no one to comfort him, because he really had been true all along: no one wanted to love him, and why would they? He never deserved it, and he knew it perfectly.
You never loved me.
The pain only grew stronger as he lay there and he could not stop himself from crying now.