That Sort of Thing

“Isn’t it a little late for us to be going out on dates?” June asked. Barricade had been awfully mysterious about this whole thing, showing up after class and asking if she had the afternoon free. “I mean, it’s not like you’re trying to charm your way into my pants.”

“You’re not wearing pants,” he said, deflecting quite smoothly, he thought. “Besides, maybe want to get in your hypothetical pants in different and exotic locations.”

She looked out his windows…at miles and miles of scrubland baking slowly in the California sunshine. Completely anonymous No-Cal wildfire-waiting-to-happen. “Yeah, this is exotic.”

“It’s a surprise,” he said. “Now shut up and be surprised.”

She laughed. “I’m sure I will.” It had been over three weeks since she’d seen him and she hated how much she’d missed him. Not just the sex, or having to drive her own damn self to work again, but…just his personality. He was…unpredictable. June felt the mid-semester rut sucking her down into a swamp of grading papers and trying not to murder students who texted in class, and doing anything with Barricade jerked her right out of that grey grind. Gave things color.

But, she told herself, he’s not yours. Don’t get too attached. Enjoy him while you have him, but…try to hold on to him and you’ve lost him already.

Barrricade turned off the highway onto a bumpy secondary road. She heard his engine race—whatever he had planned, they were getting closer to it and the thought was making him happy. They crested a hill—she saw a rusted out gas station and, on a rise behind it, a helicopter. Not rusted out. Guns and everything. Had he robbed the Presidio?

“Ever have sex in a helicopter?” he asked, impishly, popping his door for her to get out.

“I can’t say that I have.” She reached in to grab the jacket he’d insisted she bring and straightened up. “And definitely not a military one.”

“Got one better than that, though, just in case: ever have sex in a sentient helicopter?” He pushed back into his robot mode.

“Definitely not.” She approached the copter slowly. “I presume he’s a friend of yours?”

“Yep.” He folded his arms over his torso, watching her take in the size of the copter. Blackout was big, he acknowledged, grudgingly. But…well, size isn’t everything.

“You corrupting him, too?”

“Maybe,” he grinned.

“So, how did you drag him into this?” She thought of his last ‘convert’ and what it had taken to persuade him. If so, she was sorry she’d missed this one. That was hot.

“I lost a bet.” The copter spoke, his voice deep and miserable. His rotors drooped toward the ground.

“Awwww,” June said, giving his fuselage a sympathetic pat. He made an alarmed noise, his rotors twitching. June snatched her hand back. “I’m sorry!” she said, quickly. Though it did amuse her that the large chopper was…afraid of her?

Barricade glared at the copter. After a long moment, the copter muttered, “’Sokay. Just…wasn’t expecting it. Or something.”

Barricade growled.

“Uhhh, you can do it again if you want…?”

Barricade gestured to June. She hesitated—she didn’t want to make the poor copter uncomfortable. Then realized what a bizarre sentence that was. She placed her hand gently on the copter’s metal skin, warm from the afternoon sun. “Not so bad, is it?” Barricade said.

“No,” the copter admitted. “But no way you’re gonna get me to—“

“No one’s asking that. Of HER.” Barricade turned to June. “He’s a terrible kisser. Like kissing an epileptic octopus.”

“Am not!” The copter sounded outraged.

“Want to let her decide?”

The copter grumbled. “Should’ve seen that one coming.”

June grinned. She didn’t know how—or why—Barricade was dragging the copter into this mess he called a sex life, and she was definitely intrigued to know how Barricade knew about how this one kissed. Oh look, she thought, we have something in common. She didn’t think it would be too good to spring that one on the copter. Not just yet. “I’m June, by the way. Pleased to…meet you?” She looked over his large shape, but couldn’t find anything like a face.

“Blackout,” he said. “And it’s weird to meet you.” She laughed. “What the hell do you see in this guy, anyway?”

“Barricade?” she turned to look at Barricade. “Well, he’s awfully cute.”

Blackout made the weird metal grinding sound that she’d figured out was a laugh. “Cute! I told you so!”

“Shut up.” Barricade snarled. “Am not cute.”

“Even cuter when he’s mad, don’t you think?”

June laughed. Barricade kicked the copter’s side, his mouth pulled into an agonized frown. “Show you mad.”

June stopped laughing, reaching up to stroke Barricade’s thigh armor. “Please don’t be mad, sweetheart.”

“Sweetheart?” the copter said. “Whoa. I don’t know if I should take notes or vid this for blackmail.”

“Take notes,” Barricade snapped. “Your technique sucks.” He turned to June. “You should have seen him his first time.”

The copter shuddered. “You…you were watching?”

“’You had some…gunk in the mount’? Sound familiar?” Back to June. “Honestly. Is that a good pick up line to you?”

She tilted her head. “In the right context, it could be adorable.”

Barricade snorted. “Ha! Adorable is way worse than cute.”

“It was my first time!” the copter said, hotly. “Besides, that means she likes my line. Which means it would work.”

“He’s also really noisy. Not,” Barricade bent down to nip June’s shoulder, “as noisy as you. I made audio if you want to hear it.” He smirked at the copter.

“Only if you tell her what YOU were doing at the time.”

Barricade looked uncomfortable. “Intelligence gathering.”

“Oh right. Care to enlighten us as to what you gathered?”

“I gather,” Barricade said, taking June up in his arms, “that it’s time to get this little adventure off the ground.” He ducked his head and climbed into the copter’s fuselage. “So, what do you think: ocean or mountains?” He settled himself in the copter’s cargo area, seated, with June between his legs.

“Why don’t we let him decide? He’s flying. And,” she leaned up to kiss him. “I think we might be distracted for a while.”

He snorted. “Think we might distract him. Ocean, Blackout. No good if you fly us straight into a mountain.”

The copter grumbled something, but it was lost in the sound of his rotor engine kicking on. He rolled his doors shut, and the roar cut considerably, though June could still feel the vibration through her feet.

“You,” Barricade said, “Are wearing too many clothes.”

“Define too many.”

“You need to wear…much less.”

She winked at him. “Like how much less?”

“Let’s see.” His talons pushed her jacket off her shoulder. “Lose this.” She shrugged out of the jacket, dropping it on the floor behind her. “And those weird things on your feet.”

“They’re called boots.”

“Not interested in your weird xeno vocabulary at the moment.”

She bent down and unzipped the boots, prying them off awkwardly. Silly robots didn’t wear clothes so they had no idea how hard it was to take them off. In a moving helicopter. She braced herself against his thigh, grinning as he gasped at her small fingers’ grip under his armor plating, peeling off her socks. “Bonus!” she said, waving them in the air, and put her bare feet on the floor.

The copter made an uncomfortable sound. Barricade sighed. “We going to have to go through this again, Blackout?”

“No,” the copter said, glumly.

“All right, human, here’s the ultimatum: everything you don’t want reduced to rags. Off. Now.”

“Oooh, I like it when you get all aggressive.” She stripped.

“He does try at least,” the copter interjected. “Easier to pull off when he’s the bigger one. Which isn’t often.”

“You’re supposed to watch and learn, you.” Barricade thumped the side of the cargo hold with one elbow.
“Now,” he swept June up against him, pressing her bare skin against his armor, giving something like a contented sigh. “Missed you,” he said.

June wrapped her arms around his head. “Missed you, too.” She bit back a term of endearment. Don’t blow it. Don’t cling. His hands were hard against her back, insistent, demanding.

“Don’t have a lot of patience right now,” he muttered into her hair. “Been a while.”

“You’re telling me?” She leaned forward to nuzzle his throat. He growled, but it was a happy sound.

“Play with you later,” he said, and lay her on the floor. Blackout made a surprised noise. “Oh, you like that, Blackout? Try this,” he flipped June over with one deft hand, pressing her chest against the copter’s metal flooring plates.

“Squishy,” the copter choked. “And warm.”

“Yes,” Barricade agreed. He knelt over June, pressing her against the ground with one hand while the other stroked along her back—her shoulderblades, the back of her neck, down her spine. He sighed appreciatively. She turned her head to try to look at him. He took advantage of the way it cleared the opposite side of her throat, and leaned in, kissing her exposed throat. June’s eyes closed. He ran his hand, and then his glossa, down her central dorsal line—in humans marked with an indent, he noted. A very sensitive indent, especially down toward the bottom. She squirmed, her breath coming heavier.

“Thought you said you’d play later,” she gasped.

“Right,” he grabbed for his module, parting her legs from behind. “Okay with you?” She arched her hips up. He felt the familiar wet warmth of her access port with one talon, then pushed the module in. They both sighed.

He knelt over her, feeling her body shudder in rhythm to his datastream, stroking her body, sweeping her short, red curls off her face. He braced himself on one elbow, his other hand kneading at her shoulder—he didn’t need to hold her against Blackout’s floor any more. Her fingers dug into the deck plating. June’s eyes shut tight.

“June,” he gasped, “you are—“ The urgency brought on by three weeks’ absence tore his overload through him before he could finish the sentence. He collapsed against his stabilizing elbow, his other hand still and hard around her shoulder.

She waited patiently for him to stir, her own breath slowly coming back under control. Finally, the talons around her shoulder released. He bent in and planted a kiss between her shoulder blades. “Told you I missed you,” he said. June rolled her shoulders over, her hips held down by one of his kneeling thighs, swinging one arm clear to stroke his face. He kissed her gently, before his eyes took on a teasing glint. “And you know how I am with an audience.”

“I do.” She felt him reach between her legs and pull out his module, and then roll her hips over onto her back.

“Gaaah!” Blackout interrupted in a stage whisper. “Barricade. Your xeno is leaking!”

Barricade jerked back. “What? Where?” He looked alarmed. June started laughing. Barricade joined her when he saw the puddle of his energon between her thighs. “That’s me, you idiot.”

“That’s---oh gross. Seriously. Gross.”

June covered her mouth with one hand, trying to muffle her laugher, the fingers of her other hand working under Barricade’s chest armor. “Is he normally such a prude?”

“Pretty much.”

“I don’t envy you the monumental task you’ve taken.”

“I am a martyr to my cause,” he sighed, melodramatically.

“I’m the fraggin’ martyr here,” the copter said. “You get all the fun, I get all the…sticky.”

Barricade winked down at June. “Poor thing. I could clean that up for you, you know?”

The copter’s voice was relieved. “Yes. Please.”

June squirmed as Barricade pulled her thighs apart and licked at the puddle of energon.

The copter bucked in the sky, throwing the two inches in the air. “ACK! No! No! Stop it!”

“I think it tickles him?” She was knocked a little breathless.

Barricade looked up, considering. “Maybe. Maybe turns him on and he doesn’t want to admit it.” He bent back to the task.

The copter made a series of weird clicks and shudders. “No, please, stop. Seriously. It’s fine. Just…just….leave the puddle. Please?”

June shook her head. “That doesn’t help me clear it up at all.”

“Me neither. Still, he did ask soooo nicely. And…round two.” He reached forward, kissing his way up her belly.

June’s hands had clutched around his module when the copter had bucked. She held up one open palm, sticky with the blue substance. “Maybe I can help decide?” Barricade licked her fingers, making a contented mutter in the back of his throat as his large glossa wrapped around each of her delicate fingers. Her other hand kneaded the module’s sides.

“Verdict?” He gave her hand one more lick across the palm.

“Both. It tickles AND….”

“I’ll take both.” His body shuddered as she placed her newly-cleaned hand back on his module, probing the sensitive node. “Someone’s feisty.” She raised the module to her mouth. He felt heat and her own small tongue on him, like a hot dart. “Warned you about this,” he choked.

“I think I can figure out when to stop.” She probed the interior node with her tongue. His whole body twitched.

“Your funeral.”

“Hell of a way to go,” she smirked. “Wonder how they’d write up the obit?”

He collapsed hard on his side as she sent an unreadable storm of pleasurable sensations through his module using her mouth and both of her hands. His datastream struggled—in her access port, its rhythm was unopposed. Here, it fought a complicated rhythm of her mouth and hands. He gasped, shivering, one hand clutching around one of her thighs. “June,” he said, as if he were going to say something else. He flopped onto his back, staring blankly at the copter’s ceiling, his breath in pants. He wasn’t used to having to come into synchrony with someone else. And the few times he’d had to, it had hurt. Agony. This…was not. A formless word tore from his throat, his hands clawing at the floor. His moaning took on a rhythm and gained in volume. He felt her warm tongue against his module, one hand shifted to prod the node at the tip, the other teasing his connector cables. Too much, all at once. With a howl and a jump that bounced his entire frame off the floor, he overloaded.

*****
He faded back in to devilish laughter from June. The copter was wailing, something about his cargo walls this time. Barricade let his head loll to one side, slowly, and felt a smirk spread across his face. June had known what she was doing and had pulled away at the last moment. His overload had spilled over her shoulder, the copter’s deck plating and spattered against the wall.

“See,” Blackout was trying to explain, in a tone of harried patience, “There’s wrong and then there’s WRONG. This, this is just WRONG.”

“Which part? Him having sex with me?”

“Oh I’m so over that,” the copter said. “I think. But the point is, seriously. This is my cargo hold. I…I put stuff here. My stuff! And now it’s got….”

“His stuff?” June stifled a laugh.

“This is so not funny, “ the copter said.

“Quit whining,” Barricade managed, his breath still a little uneven. “It washes off.”

“Washes off? Easy for you to say. And what’s going to wash off the stain my memory cortex?”

“Really, don’t you think you’re overreacting?”

“Overreacting? I’ve had…squishy bits all over me, and…this blue…puddle of YOU and…not to mention what I’ve had to see! Or hear! Primus.” The copter’s voice dropped. “Wish I’d thought to record that last one, though. Never call ME the noisy one again.”

“Plausible deniability,” Barricade said, picking up his module from between June’s fingers. “And you want to hear something?” He bent over June’s thighs, parting her legs with one hand. She whimpered in anticipation.

“The answer is probably no,” the copter grumbled. After a moment, “What exactly are you doing?

Barricade looked up at June over her belly and winked. “Got him now,” she grinned back.

“No way. I just want to know how to describe this disturbing incident when I tell Starscream about it.”

Barricade rested the side of his head against June’s upraised thigh. “You sure about that, Blackout? I think Starscream might have done this himself at some point.”

“I know he did,” June added.

“Oh Primus you’ve ruined him!”

“He doesn’t seem to mind.”

“He’s…he’s just being polite. That’s all.”

“Right. Because Starscream’s really known for his manners.”

June interrupted. “This the hot jet you’re talking about?” Blackout muttered an assent that was drowned out by Barricade’s protest.

“Hot? Why does he get to be hot, and I’m,” he said the word with frank distaste, this time, “cute?”

“I want to be hot, too,” Blackout muttered. “I bet I am. I bet she’d think so.”

“In your recharge. And I wouldn’t be so keen to be betting anything after last time,” Barricade sniped. “Meanwhile,” he bent back over June’s thighs. “Show you,” he muttered at her. “Hot isn’t everything.”

June was going to apologize, but the apology got drowned under a rising whimper as he went back to work with his glossa and cool talons. Her body arched against the floor, gasping and moaning, until she made a high noise, slapping her hands hard on the floor, and went limp.

“She’s noisier,” Barricade said, watching her limp form appreciatively. He did enjoy watching the aftereffects of his efforts on her.

“Depends. Pitchwise, she was higher. Decibel, though, no. You still win that one.”

Barricade made a sour face. “That doesn’t count. This damn cargo area’s a resonance chamber.”

“Took readings on you both in same ‘resonance chamber’. You’re louder.”

“You were kind of loud,” June said. “But,” when she saw his angry look, “that was an exception. Normally you’re not.”

“I know!” the copter said. “Normally he barely makes any noise at all.”

“Shut up.” Barricade said, uncomfortable again. It’s like the two were conspiring against him. Damn copter. Starscream hadn’t bonded with June like this. Wait. Am I…jealous? “You don’t know enough to know anything about ‘normal’, Blackout.”

“YOU are the non-normal one here,” Blackout said. “And I’ve interfaced with you, twice. I know.”

“It was once.”

“One…occasion.”

June sat up. “I am dying to hear about this occasion.”

“Oooooh, the hot jet was there, too.”

“The hot jet you have a crush on.” Barricade snapped. This was not going how he’d wanted it to go at all.

Floorboards shifted as the copter squirmed. “Yeah? So? Even your June xeno says he’s hot.”

“I should never have let him touch you,” Barricade muttered. June looked at him, her grin dying. She pulled herself to her feet and leaned against him, kissing gently at his face—his cheek plating, the spines over his eyes.

“I only did it because you were right there,” she murmured.

“Really?” He tried to put acid in his voice. Failed.

“Yes. Really. And only because you wanted him to.”

“But he’s…hot and…..” He banged his elbow hard as the copter started snickering again. “Shut up! This is serious.”

June stroked his chassis. “And…you’re cute. And…oh, honey, I’m no good at saying this sort of thing.”

“Oooooh, what sort of thi—ow!” Blackout yelped as Barricade hit his fuselage again.

Barricade was looking at her, expectantly. She swallowed. Do I really want to do this? I can ruin the whole thing right here. But…. She felt a flush spread over her cheeks, even across her chest. “I—you mean a lot to me. You. Not just, you know, for all this,” she waved a hand around the copter’s bay. Well, that was awkward and half-assed, she thought.

His eyes seemed to flicker. She lowered hers. Good going, June. Blew it. Hope that last time was good, because it’s the last you’re going to have. Stupid, stupid clingy woman. Stupid irony that she’d only said anything about how she felt for him because she didn’t want him to feel bad. She waited for him to pull away.

“Blackout,” he said, his voice cold. “If you make fun of this, ever, I will range hack you and fly you into a building. With a full load of explosives.”

The copter’s voice was small. “I’m just quietly taking notes,” he squeaked.

“June,” he said, his eyes everywhere but on her, “Uhhh. Me too. You know. About that sort of thing.” June felt tears prick her eyes. Not that he was just as bad at this as she was—possibly even worse—but because she saw what it took out of him to admit it. She touched his face, trying to turn his eyes to her. He pulled away. “Not that it means that much, really, you know, coming from me. Just first time I’ve…you know…had anything….” He cringed, waiting for the copter to laugh or June to say something. Nothing. He risked a look at her. She looked—unreadable. Her mouth looked like it was trying to fight a smile, her eyes, tears.

“Oh no,” the copter wailed. “You two are going to do it again, aren’t you?”

*****

Blackout had dropped them on a small atoll somewhere in the Pacific, muttering direly that he was going to wash his cargo hold and that it had better come off as he rolled toward the shoreline.

“So,” June said, watching the copter transform and wade into the waves, “What plans do you have for him, anyway?”

“Don’t really want to talk about him right now,” Barricade said, pulling her back against his chest, his hands exploring with some urgency her thighs, her belly. He pressed his face against her shoulder.

“What do you want to talk about? You?”

He frowned as his exploring fingers found the ridge of a half-healed scar. One he had made on her. “No.” A long pause. “You know he and I and the jet….” He said it like it was a confession.

“Yeah I figured that. Did you have a good time?”

“It was…awkward. You know, because of how I have to do it. And coming between the damn copter and the jet he’s so hot for…. But yeah. It was fun. Felt like I was almost normal.” A pause. “Understand if you’re upset.”

“Why would I be upset? Only thing I’m upset about is that I didn’t get to watch.” She grinned, turning to kiss him on the cheek. “I love watching you,” she murmured.

He rested his forehead against her shoulder, the plating above his eyes cool on her skin. “Just…you know. Not fair for me to get jealous when I’ve done it. Double standard and all that.”

“Nonsense.” She reached up her hand to stroke the top of his head. “I’m not jealous. I love that you enjoyed it. Honestly, if it were another…well, another woman, it would be different. I’m certainly not going to lie about that. But another of your kind? Two of them? Only thing I’m jealous of is I wasn’t there.”

He lifted his head, turning to look at her, all four of his eyes rotating to study her face. “You,” he said. “Are unreal.”

She grinned, elbowing him gently in the chest. “I know: I am such a pervert.”

“Not what I meant.” His hands tightened across her body, pulling her back against him with enough force to take her breath away. “You know what I meant,” he murmured. He lifted his head. “Hey, Blackout? Get your soggy aft over here. Stay in there any longer and you’re going to get coral reefs in your exhaust.”

She narrowed her eyes at him. “What are you doing?”

“Copter wants to know if he’s hot. And you are upset you missed it. And…” he bent down to lick her ear, “I will not be jealous.”


*****
“I do not have a good feeling about this,” Blackout said to himself as he crossed over to where the pair sat like they were force welded together. He especially didn’t have a good feeling about the look in Barricade’s optics.

“Well,” Barricade prompted June, “What do you think?”

She looked up at Blackout. “He’s too far away. Can you get him lower?”

Barricade clicked two of his talons together. “Join us down here, flying pumpkin.”

“I don’t even know what you’re trying to do,” the copter grumbled, lowering himself to his backside. “But I’m pretty sure I won’t like it. And why is your xeno staring at me that way?”

“Well,” June said, to Barricade. “The rotors are nice. I like that look. Kind of halfway between an angel and a cape. The big hunchback engine mount, though, is a little…much.”

“Hmmm, but those are functional. How about the face? Decorative?”

Light dawned in Blackout’s brain. He covered his face. “Stop looking at me!”

“What?” Barricade asked. “You said you wanted to know. June?”

“Well, normally I’d say hot,” she said, teasing, “but the shyness changes it to adorable.”

Barricade tsked. “Missed ‘hot’ by just that much. Sorry Blackout.”

“No way! She said hot. I heard her. It totally counts.”

“Nope. You lost another bet. And you know what that means you have to do?”

“WHAT?! Wait! We didn’t make that official. That bet doesn’t count! Dammit, this is how you got me LAST time.”

“And it still works, apparently. Just lose with grace, copter, will you?”

The copter smacked himself in the head with one hand. “Fine,” he said, his tone resigned. “What do I have to do this time?”

“June wants you to---“

“No way. I didn’t make the bet with her. You are not tricking me into kissing your xeno.”

Barricade sighed. “Such poor sportsmanship. You should be ashamed. But we’ll give you the choice, to show how generous we are. Her or me.”

“Seriously? I can’t like…take a raincheck or something? Copter’s gotta be in the mood for that sort of thing. You know. The mood with…no audience and stuff?”

Barricade stood up, placing June on the ground and shaking sand out of his knee joints. “Yeah? Phrase ‘made your decision for you’ ring any bells?” He grabbed the seated copter by the chest armor—standing he was almost the seated copter’s height, and pulled the copter’s mouth against his. Blackout tried to lean back, out of it, for an instant, but Barricade’s other hand caught at one rotorblade. The copter moaned, his mouth against Barricade’s.

“This is so not fair,” Blackout breathed, as the smaller mech dropped his mouth to the copter’s throat. “And your pickup line sucked.” His hands floated up to Barricade’s shoulders, reaching for the upper tires.

Barricade jerked as the copter’s fingers spun the upper tires.

“Oooooh,” June said, her eyes wide. “What did you DO?! I have to know that one!”

Blackout grinned, turning to look down at her. “Tires are really sensitive. They’re drivetrain, so they have all sorts of extra…sensor endings. You like?” He spun them again, smirking as Barricade staggered against him.

“Stop it,” Barricade muttered.

“What else?” June came closer, her hand on the copter’s knee.

Blackout tipped his head to one side, considering Barricade.

“Don’t you dare….” Barricade snarled.

“Your xeno wants to know.” He grinned. He grabbed Barricade and rocked back against the ground. “Get on his back,” he directed June. He managed not to even flinch as he felt her warm feet on his armor.

“Gonna kill you, copter,” Barricade said, twisting. Blackout gripped him by the shoulders. “Get up to right around the shoulders—don’t move, Barricade, you could really hurt your xeno.” He smirked. Barricade muttered darkly but stopped moving. “Right. Get between those little wingy looking fairings on his neck.

“Nggaaah!” Barricade cried out, clutching at Blackout’s arms, as June splayed herself across his shoulders, reaching her arms down between the two fairings. “Blackout, I’m gonna—ohhhhhhh.” His eyes shuttered closed.

Blackout grinned over his shoulder at June, who had turned to look back. “Most of our hands are too small to get back there.”

“Mmmmmm, I see.” She stroked the sensitive cabling, purring as Barricade’s body shivered. “I think he likes it.”

“Hate it,” Barricade muttered, his voice muffled against Blackout’s chest. His hands dug around the copter’s chest armor.

Blackout laughed. “He hates it. Want more proof?” Blackout’s hand snapped open Barricade’s interface hatch. He held up the other’s greenlit module. “See how much he hates it?”

“Hate you.”

“Of course you do. Why you always make up these stupid bets with me.” Blackout popped open his own hatch and plugged in Barricade’s module. He gave a contented sound in his throat. Barricade’s hands tightened on his chest armor.

“Stop,” Barricade breathed. “Hurt you.”

“Don’t worry about me,” Blackout rumbled, distantly. “Later.”

June slid down from the smaller mech’s shoulder and onto Blackout’s chest. Barricade swept her up with one arm into a fierce kiss, while his other untangled itself from the copter’s armor and reached for the other’s module. “You said you wanted to watch,” he said, huskily to June. Blackout shuddered as the smaller mech teased his module with his glossa and then wrapped it around. Barricade pulled June back into another kiss around the connector cables. Blackout twitched repeatedly at the heat and wetness of June’s mouth on his sensitive module, the warmth of her body down his chest; moans escaping his mouth. His hands released the smaller mech, clawing into the sand helplessly. And Barricade’s own insistent buzzing module rhythm. Barricade pulsed the module in his mouth with the same rhythm as his own datastream.

Blackout cried out and overloaded, arching his back—with the weight of the two of them on him—into the air, his flaring rotors slicing into the sand. . Barricade overloaded more quietly, with a soft sound in the back of his throat and his one hand tight around June’s shoulders.

He faded in to her kissing his ear, his throat. “You were noisier,” she teased. He unwound his glossa from the module, trying to glare at her. “Unfair comparison.” He held the module out to her. “Bet he’s louder in a fair test.”

She hesitated, one hand on the copter’s module. Already, greenlights were struggling up the ready row. “Quick,” Barricade added, “Before he fades in enough to figure it out.” His eyes flickered at her in that way she’d figured was their equivalent to a wink.

“In the interests of fairness,” she said, and raised the copter’s module in her hands like a salute. “Wish me luck!”

“MMMmmmmmm,” the copter was saying, “Barricade: how’d you ever…,” he rolled his head over to see the smaller mech sitting up, watching him. Barricade showed him his empty hands, grinning. Blackout’s head dropped back against the sand. “Oh no.”

“Oh yes.”

“Now, look here, xeno!” Blackout started to sit up. Barricade held him back with a hand. “Wait. I mean, seriously. This is like rape or something.” A moan forced its way out of his throat as he felt the heat of June’s mouth on his sensitive inner node. “Or…something,” he repeated, absently, his eyes closing.

“Do you want me to stop?” June paused. She wasn’t going to force herself on him. As a joke, maybe it had gone far enough. Rape was a word she didn’t mess around with.

“No,” the copter breathed, his eyes tightly closed. Barricade nodded at her. Their ethics were…different. Apparently his kind didn’t have the same sort of definition of non-consensual. He’d tried to explain it to her once, that that was why modules had ready-lights to begin with. Judging by that, this was NOT against at least part of Blackout’s wishes.

The copter moaned, his whole body shuddering as she returned her attention to his module. Delicious sensations ran through his sensor net, tingles of electricity cascading from the hatch itself across his body. He writhed as his module tried to find which—of the three—rhythms it could synchronize with. Her mouth and each hand seemed to work at a different pace, The struggle was…agonizing and powerul and all-encompassing. He kept his eyes closed. This was all about his sensor net and its sensations. This was something totally different than interfacing with, say, Starscream. Half of the thrill, the eroticism of that, was the jet’s reaction, and his own feelings. This was just pure bodily sensation. Undiluted.

He heard a series of odd sounds—growls, moans, whimpers—and then a final loud roar, only realizing then, as overload took him under in a tsunami of electrical sensation, that the sounds were coming from him.

*****

Blackout faded in to the feel of a cool evening breeze coming off the water across his armor. A warm spot, on his right: he slitted his eyes to see Barricade, leaning against him, arms folded across his chest, staring at the waterline. Blackout rolled his head and saw June’s pale face bobbling in the water.

“Think you win for being out the longest,” Barricade murmured. “And before you ask, way loud. Scared the damn birds out of the trees.”

“That was…weird.”

“Was going to just make you kiss her, but noooooo, You had to make a big thing out of how that was one thing you weren’t going to do. I DO try to look out for you, you know, you copter glitch.” He kept his eyes on the water.

“Sorry,” the copter mumbled.

“Didn’t sound sorry half a cycle ago.”

“Is that—is that how long I’ve been out?”

“Yep.”

“It did feel….whoa.” He checked his internal chrono. Complete systems reset. Whoa indeed.

Barricade smirked. “Yeah. I know.”

“How the hell did you find her?”

“Luck. The kind I almost never get.”

“Barricade?” He waited until the smaller mech finally turned to look at him. “Don’t fuck this one up.”

Barricade’s eyes went hard, then liquescent, then hard again. “Trying not to.”