Come Undone

It had, until this point, been a good mission. No, not just a ‘good’ mission, Obi-Wan mused, but a most successful one. Two diametrically opposed parties had at last seen eye to eye after what had been several months, possibly years of disagreement. The discussions had been productive, even genial at times; there had been no attacks and no fighting… Not to mention that even the negotiations between the Sulustians and their warring factions had been successful! Anakin and Obi-Wan had worked together very effectively, and at least one star system would remain in the embrace of the Republic… for now.


For the journey home, the Star Cruiser “Jewel of the Republic” had been under strict radio silence and only the most urgent messages had been allowed through. Now that they had reached home space the chatter had begun again, and Obi-Wan had retreated to his shared quarters with Anakin, the peace of hyperspace at an end. Still, he couldn’t shake the feeling that his time of quiet was coming to an end. Anakin had been oddly restless, even more so than usual. He assumed that Anakin was anxious to get back to Coruscant, and very probably at the earliest opportunity, to Senator Amidala.


Amidala, again.


Obi-Wan sighed aloud. Perhaps when they returned home it would finally be time to approach Anakin about his relationship with the Senator. Even though Anakin had finally attained his Knighthood, Obi-Wan still felt bound by responsibility to… to teach… to guide…
When Anakin burst out inhe rhe room, he was only half dressed and had an obtuse look on his face that Obi-Wan knew all too well. Anakin had set his mind to something, and the Force help anyone or anything that got into his way. Obi-Wan sadly realized that they were in for a confrontation. As usual, Anakin did not disappoint him.
Ana Anakin threw his rucksack on to the couch, alternately removing and adding items almost haphazardly, seemingly unaware, or perhaps uncaring, of his former Master’s presence. He was pale and drawn but with a look of grim determination on his face. Slightly taken aback, Obi-Wan decided to approach this new development carefully but firmly.


"Where are you going, Anakin?" Obi-Wan asked softly.


Anakin paused, considering, and then shook his head dismissively, refusing to answer. Seemingly dazed, he began the cycle of unpacking and repacking all over again.


“Anakin…” Obi-Wan began again. “We must meet the Council as soon as we return.”


A few data discs landed on the table with a clatter.


“Go without me,” Anakin said shortly. “The reports are all there, it’s not as if they would consider anything I have to say important anyway.” He stalked back into their sleeping quarters and came back with a few items of clothing which he unceremoniously stuffed into the bag.


Obi-Wan reproached him sadly, “that isn’t true, and it’s an unfair assumption. You’re missing the point, Anakin; you're reneging on your responsibilities.”


“I don’t care! Some things are far more important!” Anakin snapped, throwing his bag over his shoulder and drawing himself to his full height. No longer a gangly teenager, he was an imposing figure, throwing off an odd mix of anger, indignant outrage and to Obi-Wan’s puzzlement, perhaps a bit of… elation?
The two men stood face to face, unmoving and without speaking until the tension became almost unbearable, and sadly familiar.


At last, Anakin said coolly. “I’m not your Padawan Learner anymore Obi-Wan,” “You need not worry about my actions reflecting on you.”


“You’re right” Obi-Wan replied a bit sadly. “At least in part. You are no longer my Padawan, but you are my friend.” Here he paused, at a loss for words. It was always like this, Obi-Wan realized. He could never make Anakin see how his actions… his ways, often so different from that of the traditional Jedi Code, were hard to comprehend by others of their Order. How difficult it was for himself…


"I'm sorry," Anakin said suddenly, regaining some composure. "This is something that I must attend to. Alone."


Without a second glance behind him, he made his way past Obi-Wan and to the departure bay.
Obi-Wan sighed. He knew he should go after Anakin but at this point, it would only end up in an unproductive confrontation. Besides, Anakin was right in some ways. He was a full-fledged Jedi Knight after all, and he was truly no longer Obi-Wan’s responsibility. Why should he care for Anakin’s future? Surely it wasn’t out of a misguided sense of pride? Anakin seemed to always make him question his own motivations; it wasn’t something he felt comfortable with.


Reluctantly, Obi-Wan decided that for now he would just set this all aside. He would let this passionate young man deal with whatever it was that had consumed him so utterly at the moment, and then… then… at long last he would finally take the issues to task. Both Anakin’s and his own.