Homeschool

Chapter 2: "Private Lesson"


"Kissing is a complicated oral maneuver, requiring focus, concentration and most of all, dexterity. Think of it as a triple Salchow with your mouth." Chazz flicked his tongue like a snake, and I nodded solemnly. Katie and I had failed miserably each time we had attempted this, and I was determined to drink in every drop of Chazz's knowledge.

We were back sitting on my bunk, and I had a pen and pad of paper at the ready.

"First of all, as in any sport, you want to limber up." He opened his mouth wide, stretching out his tongue and I was amazed to see that it reached the bottom of his chin. He narrowed his eyes at me and tapped my shoulder. "Follow along, Princess, this isn't for my benefit."

I quickly adopted the same pose, mirroring each lip, jaw and tongue stretch that he demonstrated.

"Also," he continued, "you want to be aware of your expression. You don't want to close your eyes and miss all the full-lipped hotness, but you don't want to stare and creep her out either. Ergo," he said, letting his eyelids fall to half-mast, "the smouldering heavy lidded eye." I gave him the same smouldering stare. "Now pout," he said, letting his lips fall full and slightly parted.

I tried to do the same but ended up giggling.

"Sorry," I said, taking some deep breaths, "I'm just nervous."

Chazz paused while I got myself under control, then continued.

"How is your lean-in?"

"My what?"

"Your lean-in. You don't want your nose to run interference. She tilts left, you tilt right. She tilts right …?"

"I tilt left?"

"You've got it, my man! Now, I'm going to lean in, try to read me."

"Are- are you going to … kiss me?" It suddenly seemed very hot in the room and I pulled at the neck of my pajamas, swallowing nervously. Chazz thought for a moment, then shrugged.

"I guess so. It's kind of fruity, but if this will help you get your dinky stinky, then I'm willing to take one for the team."

He leaned in towards me and I instinctively leaned back. "Chazz, I don't-"

"Come on, Doll Face, if I can do this, so can you." I straightened back up, but tensed when he leaned in again. "Eyes," he said, his voice deep and soothing, "close your eyes."

"I'm trying," I said, my breath shallow and uneven.

"Relax your mouth."

"I can't."

"Okay," he said, sitting up and away from me, "we'll take this reeaal slow. You're my nervous little filly, and I'm the Horse Whisperer."

He gently cupped my face in his big, warm hands and murmured softly.

"Relax, Princess, it's okay."

He leaned forward and brushed the tip of his nose back and forth against mine.

"I don't bite."

He nuzzled a soft line up my cheek to my temple, his breath hot in my ear.

"The Chazz Man won't hurt you."

"Okay," I said, my voice sounding thick and far away.

"Here we go," he whispered, his mouth brushing my skin.

I nodded. I was ready. I could do this.

I braced myself as Chazz shifted on the bed, then, with my face still in his hands, he pressed his lips to the inner corner of my brow. It was such a sweet and tender gesture that I couldn't help but relax.

He kissed the bridge of my nose, then the other brow, trailing kisses across the ridge there and down to my cheeks. God! I had been doing this all wrong! I had just attacked Katie's mouth. It had never occurred to me to kiss the rest of her face.

Chazz then moved on to my ear, nibbling the lobe and dragging those lips whisper-soft along my jaw. I sighed and let my head fall back.

"That feels … really good."

He smiled into my neck and suckled on the tender skin there.

"Just wait, my lovely, this is just the opening credits before the main attraction. No, wait, this is the coming attractions before the main attraction. Or … no, this is the stupid trivia crap that they make you sit through before they even PLAY the coming attractions."

"Chazz."

"What?"

"Shut up."

His eyes sparked as he desperately tried to think of a come-back, but then settled for the ever-lame, "You shut up."

"I'm not the one talking."

"Funny, but that sounded like English to me."

I sighed. Not because I was frustrated, but because I was getting uncomfortably warm, and having him this close to me was making me nervous. I was about to say something. Anything. About how crazy this was. How wrong we were to try it, when he pressed his lips to mine. Dry and chaste at first. Just a nibble. A gentle caress, then a tentative swipe of his tongue across the seam of my lips. I gasped, surprised, and he took it as an invitation to enter. He explored the uneven ridge of my bottom teeth, then pulled away to suck my bottom lip between his own. Kissing Katie had never felt anything like this. My lips were tingling as his hot mouth moved over them, and his tongue playfully flicked against mine.

I screwed up my courage, and made myself kiss him back in the same way. His mouth opened wider, allowing me in. His tongue met mine again, and teased me further inside and I pushed against him, wanting more. My hands found his hair and tangled in it, pulling him closer and angling his head so I could probe deeper.

His lips ground against mine, his tongue tickling my palate and rubbing so deliciously against my own. I sighed and I could feel Chazz smirk against my mouth.

Oh God! What was wrong with me?

"Chazz," I said, breaking away and sucking my tingling bottom lip between my teeth. I could still taste him on me, and the mere thought of it made me dizzy, "that was…"

"Fuckin' amazing? I know," he said, his machismo turned up to full volume. "That's what you get when you kiss the master." He gave me a manly slap on the shoulder and got up, stretching, popping the joints in his back.

"I, uh…yeah," I answered, still stunned not only by what we had just done, but how much it had floored me.

"I had these chops insured for a million dollars," he said, grinning slyly.

"Really?" I asked.

"No, Homeschool, I'm just yanking your chain. Besides, If I was gonna insure anything, it would be the Hanging Chads." He made a flourish to the crotch of his track pants and my eyes followed, noticing, perhaps for the first time, how well he filled them out.

He had put on a bit of weight since breaking his ankle, but not too much. Tomorrow would be the first day that he would be back on skates, and it occurred to me that things might be weird between us. Oh God, I hoped not! I hoped I hadn't just ruined the best thing that had ever happened to me.

A sudden throat clearing pulled me from my thoughts and I realized with horror that I was still staring at his groin.

"Hey, Tinkerbell, my eyes are up here."

I shot my gaze up to his face, then quickly looked away, a blush rising in my cheeks.

"God, men are pigs," he chuckled, limping off to the kitchen, while I willed the bunk to swallow me whole.


* * *

Chazz was more steady on his feet than I would have expected. Coach only wanted to get us limbered up, not practice our footwork or anything, but the American Nationals were only two months away, so Chazz insisted that we go over all the moves, although Coach drew the line at overhead lifts. I had to agree. Having both of us injured wouldn't be very helpful.

Besides, most of this routine, aside from the actual throws, was side by side jumps and a bit of flourish and arm work. The 'fruity stuff', as Chazz called it, but Coach and I both know that the little details can be the difference between silver and gold.

The theme for the new routine was 'Under the Sea.' Chazz was a shipwrecked sailor and I was … a ghost or something. A Siren, or an underwater spirit of some-kind, dragging him down to the murky depths.

We did fairly well until it came time for me to circle around Chazz then move into a Biellmann spin. Chazz was having problems maintaining the correct posture so that I didn't smack him in the face with my skate, but he refused to move, so I was left with no alternative, but to smack him in the face. So I did.

"Ow!" he cried, holding the red blotch growing on his cheek.

"Hey," I replied, "I'm spinning here, what do you expect me to do? You're just standing there, get out of my way."

"I'm not just standing here, I'm emoting."

"Well, emote six inches to the left."

"How 'bout YOU don't swing your skate in my fucking face?"

"How about YOU watch your mouth?"

"Shut up, MacElroy."

"Make me, Micheals."

"I don't make monkeys, I buy them in the zoo."

"What? That's ridiculous. The zoo doesn't sell monkeys, it's unethical."

"Well, my zoo does."

"Okay, ladies," shouted Coach, from the sidelines, "break it up. Chazz, throw your shoulders back and your head will be clear. Jimmy, start your spin slightly to Chazz's right and we can probably avoid this problem altogether."

Chazz stuck out his tongue at me. Very mature.

"I told you it was your fault," he sneered.

"Chazz!" barked Coach, "Try to remember that you're a sailor, not a whale. I know it's your first day back, but you're lumbering around like an Orca."

Chazz self-consciously pulled the hem of his shirt over his belly and stage whispered to me, "If I WAS a whale, I wouldn't be an Orca, I'd be a SPERM whale, baby!" He suggestively grabbed his crotch with one hand, and pointed at me with the other. "Thar she blows, matey!"

"Screw off," I snapped, skating slow loops around him, "you're not supposed to be a whale, dumb-ass, you're supposed to be a sailor."

"Oh yeah, I can be a sailor. A seamen on the high seas, and Blondie here is my fine-looking mermaid."

"No, I'm not! I'm a ghost … I think. Or a fish. Coach? Am I a ghost?"

"No way, baby, you're my little mermaid. Spread 'em, Sweet Cheeks, here comes the semen."

"Are you retarded? If I was a mermaid, I'd only have a tail. What the hell am I supposed to spread? You'd have to fertilize my eggs after I had already laid them."

Chazz sniffed, unconcerned. "Any port in a storm."

My God, he really was hopeless.We did, however, manage to finish practice without giving Coach an embolism. I was in the locker room when I noticed Chazz staring at me.

I had been tying and un-tying my skates, trying to take them off just right. I tapped each eyelet and counted each loop, but when I loosened the laces, they became too messy and I'd have to start over again. I only wanted them to cross over each other a maximum of one time, but by the time I loosened the bottom enough to remove the skate, the top was so loose that they flopped all over, willy-nilly. I knew I was making us all late for dinner, but I had to get it just right or it would bother me all night.

"Why do you do that?"

"Do what?"

Chazz slumped his shoulders and rolled his eyes at me. "What the fuck do you think I mean?" He made jabbing motions at his skates and stuck out his tongue like a crazy person.

Shit! Why did I have to be such a freak? And why did he have to talk about it? Everyone else always managed to look the other way, as long as I skated well, but I obviously didn't have that free pass with Chazz. I gripped the laces and tried to stay calm. "Look, you're not helping, okay? Just leave me alone. The faster I do this properly, the faster we can all get home and eat."

"Just take them off."

I clenched my jaw and made a point of not looking at him. "I'm trying."

"There is no trying," he said, in his best Yoda voice, "There is only doing."

"Easy for you to say," I said, tapping frantically at the metal eyelets, "I … I can't do that."

He was silent for a moment, while I re-tightened the laces, making sure none of them were twisted, and I braced myself for the barrage of insults that were sure to come. Instead, he slid closer to me, and put his hand on my arm.

"Can I help?"

"No," I answered, both immensely grateful and mortally horrified that he had asked, "I have to do this myself."

He quietly chewed on his lip for a moment, then nodded. "Okay, I'll be outside when you're ready." He was almost out the door when I called to him.

"Chazz?"

He stopped, but did not turn around. "Yeah?"

"Uh … thanks."

He gave a curt nod and continued on his way.