Control

Title: Control
Chapter Twenty-eight
Author: Dee Dee
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Mikaela finds out something is wrong with her and goes to her own version of hell.

Mikaela and Leon lay side by side on the towel. Her head rested on his left arm and his fingers played with her hair. She was sleeping lightly and she startled awake with a sharp intake of air.

“Micki, are you ok?”

“I’m fine. I’m going to take a shower. I’ll be down in a bit for lunch.” Before any of them could say a word, she grabbed her robe and ran for the shower stall.

Dom saw her go into the outdoor shower and he could feel something was wrong. When he tried to reach out to her, he found he couldn’t read her. He walked up to the stall and knocked. “Baby, are you ok?”

She shut off the water, wrapped her robe around her wet body, and stepped out of the stall. “I am fine! I wish everyone would stop asking me that. I’m not made of fucking glass!” With that, she went into the house followed closely by her dogs.

Mikaela walked upstairs, went into the bathroom, and turned on the shower. She stripped off her robe, sat at the vanity, and stared at her reflection. Something was different with her. She could feel it but couldn’t tell what it was. ‘I thought I got my control back. I use to know everything about myself.’

She stood up and slammed her fist into the mirror. ‘You don’t even exist anymore! Maybe you never did!’ She was confused. She thought her life was beginning again when she found Dom but now something was wrong with her.

She turned and got in the shower. Everything was spinning through her mind. All the things he said, everything she said, and all the things they had done together. She sank to the floor and hugged her knees to her chest.

‘Why do I act like an animal when I’m with you?’
‘I live on instinct and emotion. Those are primal in nature. We are mated.’

‘You are my mate!’
‘Yes I am. And you are mine until the day you decide to let me go!’
‘Not gonna happen, baby!’
‘Fine! I belong to you! You own me! You are my mate!’
‘Don’t forget the ‘to do with as I please’ part!’
‘Okay. Please fuck me now.’

‘Why do I want you so damn bad?’

She closed her eyes and searched within trying to identify the difference in herself. It took her so long to go through each part of her being that the water had turned cool. Then her eyes snapped open and realization hit her like an anvil. She blinked her eyes in shock and tears began to mix with the water flowing over her. ‘By the goddess.’

She heard Dom come up the stairs and couldn’t face him. “Boys! Door!” The 3 pits sat beside each other in the doorway blocking the entrance.

He saw the dogs guarding the door and that coupled with the knowledge that she shut herself off from him, made him know she was troubled. “Mick?”

“Yes?”

‘She sounds upset.’ He definitely knew something was wrong. ‘Maybe Leon was right.’ He saw the broken mirror and panic hit him hard. She got angry whenever someone asked if she was okay so he pushed the panic from his voice and tried a different approach.

“Baby, what happened to the mirror?”

She looked at the blood running from her hand and watched it run through the water to the drain. “I hit it.” She said with no emotion in her voice.

“Why Mick?”

“I don’t know. I guess I didn’t like what it showed me.”

“Can I come in and take a look at your hands?”

Her voice sounded distant and distracted. “No. I kind of need some space. I’ll be down in a minute for lunch, ok?”

“Okay baby.” He saw the blood on the mirror, took a deep breath, and turned to go downstairs. His mate was hurting and he hated not being able to go to her.

Mikaela sat shaking in the cold water. She was still in shock but she got to her feet, turned off the water, and stepped out of the shower. She grabbed a towel and dried her body; careful of her bruised stomach. ‘Fuck. I need to go to the hospital.’ She crumbled to the floor and wept at the upcoming horror she was about to face.

Zeus looked at his mama and left his post to go to her. He licked her face and she hugged him to her and cried harder. The other 2 dogs started to whine and howl at their mother’s pain. They started towards her but Zeus growled a warning. Apollo and Ares maintained their guard of the door and continued to howl.

The dogs howling were heard by the 4 other occupants of the house. They all looked at the ceiling with curiosity and concern. “What’s wrong with the dogs?” Mia asked.

Dom’s eyes clenched shut before he answered. “Something’s wrong with Mick. They won’t let me near her.”

“Is it her injuries?” Brian started towards the stairs but Dom grabbed his arm to stop him.

“Don’t. She’ll come down when she’s ready and no-one ask her if she’s ok.”

“Dom, if she’s hurt…”

“Brian, leave her alone. Besides she has the dogs guarding the door. They won’t let anyone near her.”

They all moved slowly out to the patio and started to set out the meal. The tension in the group was sky high from their concern.

Mikaela tied her hair in a knot and wrapped a towel around her body. ‘I need someone to go with me. I can’t walk into that hell alone. It can’t be Dominic.’ She composed herself and started down the stairs.

When she walked out onto the patio, she was greeted with the worst fake smiles she had ever seen. She laughed to herself and plastered one on her face as well. “I’m starved and this looks fantastic. Lucky me. Falling in love with a man who cooks and caters to my every need.”

“Come here, baby. Sit down and lets get you fed.” Dom gently took her arm and led her to the hammock. She sat and smiled at him then focused on her plate.

Her anxiety was running high and she had no interest in eating. She tuned out everyone’s small talk and tried to decide whom to take with her. Mia wasn’t an option. Leon was leaving soon and she couldn’t deal with him right now. So that left one choice. “Brian?”

“Yeah Mikaela?”

“May I speak with you in private for a moment?” Everyone’s attention was instantly drawn to her.

“Sure.”

They got up and walked into the house with all eyes on them as they went. They walked into the library and Mikaela shut the door behind them. “I need your help.”

“Anything.”

“I need you to go with me to the hospital.” She raised her hand to stop his question. “Brian, I can’t tell you why and I don’t want you to tell anyone that we’re going. I have to warn you about something first. I have a real bad time in hospitals. You are going to have to watch me closely and make sure I don’t hurt anyone. You will probably think I’ve gone insane but the faster you get me out of there the better I’ll be.”

“Ok.”

“When we get there you will find out why I need to go and I want you to promise me that you’ll keep it to yourself.”

“I promise. When do you want to go?”

“I wanted to wait until after lunch and Leon left but I’m getting nervous and I think we should go now.” Tears started to form in her eyes and her voice started to waver.

“Ok. I’ll run next door and change. What should we tell the others?”

“I’ll tell them we are going to run an errand after I change. Use the front door when you go. I don’t want any questions before we leave.”

“I’ll meet you in the garage in 5 minutes.”

“Thank you.” She kissed him on the cheek and they both went to change.

“Dom. What do you think is going on?”

“I don’t know, man. She’s shut herself off from me since she went to shower. She punched out the mirror in the bathroom. Her hand is bleeding again.”

“Shit. She told me everything was okay and now she won’t talk to either of us.”

“Calm down. I should be more worried than you.”

Mikaela came out onto the patio about 20 minutes later. She was dressed in a tank and shorts and had her keys in hand.

“Baby, where are you going?”

“I have to run an errand.”

“Do you want me to go with you?”

“No Dominic. Brian is going with me.”

“Mick…”

“Baby, please, it’s just an errand. Mia, I’ll return him to you relatively safe since I’m driving.” She turned to Leon last. “Hey you.”

“Hey.” He had a frightened look on his face.

“I’m sorry I can’t stay to see you off.”

“Why can’t you?”

“Leon…I have something I have to do. It’s important.”

“I can stay longer. We need to talk.”

“No. You have to get back to Letty. Don’t forget you need to be back here in 2 days by noon. We’ll talk then. Keep in mind I have 10 houses you can choose from if you decide to stay. See you then.” She gave him a kiss on the cheek and turned to her mate.

He looked like his heart had been ripped from his chest. She was hit by dread, fear, and pain. She had caused it all. She took his face between her palms and kissed him gently. “I love you, Dominic. I’ll be back as quickly as possible.”

She turned to go in the house and he caught her arm. “Mick, I love you too.” He released her and she went to the garage to meet Brian.

She clicked the locks and got behind the wheel. Brian got in the passenger side. “Mikaela. Are you sure you don’t want me to drive?”

“I need to release some tension. You will have to drive us home.” She started up the engine, pulled out and tore off down the road. When she got to the main highway, she topped off the engine.

Brian looked at her. All the people he knew that could drive like this felt alive and powerful behind the wheel. Mikaela had no emotion on her face. She looked like she was mentally preparing for a war. “You drive like you fight.”

“Is that good or bad?”

“I don’t know. Why don’t you tell me why we’re going to the hospital?”

“All I can tell you is that I’m going to have that kick to my gut checked out.”

“Is it bothering you? I thought you were feeling better?” He was getting nervous.

“Brian…” Her voice broke and she started to tremble. “Why don’t you concern yourself with keeping me together when we get there.”

“Alright. Tell me why you have such a hard time with hospitals. Did you have a bad experience? Did someone you care for die in one?”

“Who has a good experience in a hospital? No. No one I care for died in a hospital. I just wig out whenever I’m in one. You’re going to think I should be committed. There’s a cell phone in the console. Dial the third stored number. It’s the hospital and let them know you are bringing me in. I don’t want them fucking with my hands, face, throat, or stitches just my stomach. Tell them that and tell them to prepare for me.”

“You said nothing was broken and there was no bleeding. Has that changed?”

“No.”

Brian was getting worried and her evasiveness was wearing on his nerves. “Then why are they going to check your stomach? Tell me! What if you freak out so bad when we get there that you can’t tell them what to look for? Mikaela please!”

She gripped the wheel so hard that her hand started to bleed again. “I think I might be pregnant.” She whispered.

“Oh my god! Mikaela, that is fantastic!”

“Is it, Brian? I just met Dom. How do I tell him after 6 days that I’m pregnant? I haven’t been with anyone in such a long time that I didn’t see the point in taking birth control. How fucking stupid am I? What if he wigs out and leaves me or doesn’t want it? What if I lost it when Bill kicked me?” She was crying so hard that she barely got out the last question.

Brian grabbed her right wrist and pulled her bloody hand off the wheel. He placed it on the gearshift and started to clean her wounds with some tissue that he found next to the cell. “Mikaela, Dom is a family man. You can see that clearly in the way he acts with all of us. He loves you more than life. You should have seen him when we went to the store. I still can’t figure out how he knew you were in danger but he was crazed to get to you. He worships you. He won’t leave you and he will want his baby to come from you.”

She turned to face him and she had a tiny light in her eyes that quickly faded. “What if I lost it?”

He smiled at her. “Let’s hope for the best and worry about that after we see the doctor. Oh Mikaela?”

“Yeah?”

“Will you keep your eyes on the road? We are doing 223mph and I’m not looking to die now that everything is going so good.”

She laughed and shook her head. “You fucking men are always paranoid about women drivers. Don’t worry about it. I will not die in a car and I can beat your ass behind the wheel any day.”

“Maybe we’ll put that to the test someday and just because you weren’t meant to die in a car doesn’t mean I won’t.”

“I never thought about that. I could walk away without a scratch except for the ones I already have.” She backed down the speed and winked at him. “Make that call, ok? They really need to get ready for me.”

As he went through the stored numbers, he saw there was a number for the house cell stored. He knew she’d say no to what he was thinking so he called the hospital and gave them the information. Then he pocketed the phone.

About 5 minutes later, she pulled up to the ER entrance, parked the car, shut off the engine, and they got out. He saw her staring at the doors and could’ve sworn that she looked at it like it was the gateway to hell. She clicked the locks and threw him the keys without even glancing at him.

She could feel it already. It was hitting her all at once. The pain, suffering, agony, loss, and misery that resided in that place were sweeping through her body. “By the gods.” Her legs buckled and she held onto the car to keep from falling.

Brian ran to her and held her up. “Mikaela?” Her eyes screwed shut and her head was shaking back and forth. She could barely register Brian repeating her name. Her hands went to her temples and her whole body was shaking. Then she went limp and screamed.

At that exact moment at her house, Dom staggered from the onslaught of emotion coming from her. The door she closed him out with earlier just blew right off its hinges. *Pain. Suffering. Agony. Loss. Misery. Fear. Love.* “Mick!!!”

Leon and Mia ran up to him and helped steady him. He couldn’t keep his legs and they lowered him to the floor. “Dom, what is it? What’s wrong?”

“Leon, it’s Mick!” He grabbed his head and his eyes squeezed shut. “She needs me!”

“Dom! How do you know?”

“Mia…I can feel it! I’ve got to find her!”

“We don’t know where they went.” Mia looked at Leon.

“Leon, I don’t give a shit. I’ve got to go to her. Grab the cell from the nightstand and see if she has the number for the car phone stored.” He ran upstairs to get the phone. Dom was clutching his head and his breathing was heavy.

“Brian is with her. He’d call if there was a problem.”

“Mia, she is my mate. I need to protect her!”

Leon came down with the phone to his ear. He ended the call. “It goes to voice mail.”

“Damn it! Mick!”

Brian carried her limp body to the gurney that came out to meet them. She was screaming so loud he couldn’t hear the cell ringing in his pocket. “Hurry up! I already called and told you what needs to be done! Do it fast, give us the verdict, and let me get her out of here!”

“Yes sir. We have had Ms. Tomasini here a couple of times. We know about her aversion to hospitals.”

“Who are you?”

“I’ll be the doctor running the tests. I’m Dr. Patricia Snoga.”

The nurses and orderlies were restraining Mikaela to the gurney to keep her from thrashing and potentially falling.

“Doc, why does she get this way? What is wrong with her?”

“What is your name, sir?”

“Brian O’Connor.”

They started to wheel her into the ER and her screams got louder. “Are you the potential father?”

“No. I’m a friend.”

“Do you know what an empath is, Mr. O’Connor?”

“People who can feel emotions from others, right?”

“That is correct. Right now Ms. Tomasini is feeling everything that everyone is feeling in this hospital. The only reason I know this is because the first time I saw her I thought she was psychotic and I was going to place her in the mental ward. She managed to convince me otherwise.”

“Oh my god. She must be going crazy right now.”

“No, Mr. O’Connor. She probably wishes she were dead right now. Get her into Exam 2!” They wheeled her into an exam room as far away from the other patients as possible but her screams did not lessen. “I suppose you are staying?”

“She asked me to.”

“Fine. We’ll draw blood for the pregnancy test and I’ll do an ultrasound. She has other wounds that I’m told we are not to treat?”

“Yes.”

“Go to her and bandage her hand. Try to get through to her.”

He moved to her right and a nurse passed him some antiseptic and gauze. He saw an orderly hold her restrained arm while the doctor drew the blood. “Get this to the lab and tell them it is top priority!”

A nurse grabbed the vial and ran out of the room. Brian cleaned up her knuckles and wrapped her hand. “Mikaela. I’m right here. It’s going to be ok.” He stroked her hair from her face and tried to calm her.

Her screaming died down after a bit and she started to mumble incoherently. “Dominic. I love you, baby.”

The doctor had lifted her shirt and cut off her shorts. “Is he the potential father?”

Brian continued to stroke her hair and he nodded his head.

“Why isn’t he here?” She was prepping the ultrasound and applying gel to Mikaela’s abdomen.

“She…was worried about how he’d take the news.”

She ran the wand over her stomach and looked at the image. “How would he take the news?”

“He’d be devastated if she lost it. Do you see anything?”

“How far along would she be?”

“Just a couple of days.”

The doctor looked at the screen then turned off the machine. “We’ll need to wait for the blood test. It’s too early for this to tell but I don’t see anything wrong with her to indicate that she’d lose the baby if she were pregnant. She has a deep bruise.”

“Good. That’s what she told me when I looked her over. How long for the work up to come back? She looks bad. I’ve got to get her away from here.”

“I’ll go check on it now.” She left the room.

“Dominic. I’m suffocating. Untie me.” He released her upper body restraint and moved to untie her wrist cuffs.

An orderly stepped forward looking extremely nervous. “Sir, I wouldn’t do that. She is quite delusional and the last time she was here she incapacitated several people!”

“I don’t care! She asks me for something and I do it! Now fuck off!” He released her other arm.

*Anger!*

The orderly moved closer when she sat up and she drove her elbow into his sternum. The air left his lungs and he staggered back. She released her leg restraints and stood up.

“Mikaela?”

She turned her black eyes to him and he saw death. “Where is my mate?”

“Mikaela…he’s at home. You didn’t want him to come with you.” He had his hands up in a gesture of surrender.

She knocked the ultrasound machine to the ground with her left hand and clutched her head with her right. “Dominic…” She heard the man behind her get to his feet. She turned, grabbing the silver instrument tray as she moved, and slammed it across his head.

“Mikaela! I’m calling him now, ok? I’ll get him here!” He hit the number for the house, when Leon answered Brian could tell they were driving. “Leon!”

“Brian! Where the fuck are you? Dom has us driving around trying to find Micki! He’s tripping out, man!”

“So is she! We’re at the hospital! Get him here fast before she kills someone!”

Leon spun the car around and gunned the engine. “Why are you at the hospital?”

“She told me to bring her here. I can’t tell you why.”

“We’re about 5 minutes away. Brian! Is she ok?”

“Leon, she was screaming bloody murder in the parking lot. Now she knocked out an orderly. I don’t think she knows who I am anymore. In fact, if Dom doesn’t get here soon, I’m pretty sure she’ll kick my ass too.”

Leon could hear her in the background. “Where is my mate? I need Dominic!”

“Mikaela, he’s on the way. I swear. Shit! Leon, hurry!” He ended the call. She had picked up a scalpel off of the floor. “Please calm down.”

“You don’t know what it’s like. I can feel them in here!” She pointed to her head and then her chest. “And here! I can feel the pain, suffering, and grief. I just felt 3 people die since we got here. Do you know what it’s like to feel death?”

“No.”

“I died 3 times! That is what it feels like!”

The door opened and Mikaela threw the scalpel. It embedded into the wall right beside the doctor’s head. “Stay the fuck away from me!”

“I will, Ms. Tomasini. I won’t move. Mr. O’Connor, get her out of here quickly before she hurts herself or anyone else.”

“She doesn’t know who I am anymore.”

“Then tell her you are taking her to the father of her child.”

“I have a child?” She whispered.

“Yes, Ms. Tomasini. You need to leave here so you don’t hurt your baby. I’ll arrange house calls to check on you so you don’t have to come back here and when the time comes we can do a home birth.”

She placed her hand over her abdomen. “I have a child. Brian…get me out of here.” Her legs started to buckle and Brian picked her up before she could fall.

“Go, Mr. O’Connor! Now! Before she gets pulled in again.”

Brian ran out of the room and down the hall to the exit. “Brian…you promised.” She whispered and then passed out. He ran out the doors and came face to face with a crazed Dom.