Dreamwalker

Chapter Five

A great, gray expanse.

Rol'ei walked in this alien world apart from it, not able to touch, or smell, or truly see this abysmal place. Smoke filled the air, somehow worse than any fire he had lived through before, even from the terrible battle....

He'd been following someone, running hand-in-hand. He could still feel that touch, but when he looked down he saw nothing but firm, darker smoke in his grip. He held onto it tightly, nothing else here holding substance.

He sought out some hint of life, some filament of what could be, and found nothing but loneliness, sadness. He'd never walked this plane alone before.

And then, that last touch slipped away from him.

He clawed against the sacred drug, fighting to resurface back in the waking world. The dream too dark, too painful.

His name in the dark. He ran, clawed, swam, pushed through the impenetrable sooty darkness.

A flicker of light called to him. He followed.

A strange figure waited for him, not exactly in this plane, not existing with him here, but seeking him out.

"Ted?"

"Yes, it is me, Great Singer."

Shining in the dark, not one but two bodies, within the same moment existing, and not, beside one another and within the same space. Rol'ei saw the familiar na'vi within the otherness of the tawtute face, one-in-the-same.

He reached out, trying to encompass that beloved face within his hands, only to be met by unnatural cold smoothness, still water not quite cold enough to be ice.

“Oel ngati kameie, Ted.” For the first time, I truly see you.

“Oel ngati kameie, Rol'ei.” The smile granted to him that of a parent placating a child.

Rol'ei tried to explain to the unusual spirit, ask for guidance in this disconsolate realm.

A bitter pebble was placed on his tongue. The spirit ordered him to swallow, so he did.

"You left me." Even here, he felt shame at the accusation in his tone. Why had Ted let him alone here? Could the tawtute offer no better realm of Dreaming? Why had he not warned the Singer, had not stayed to lead him?

Warmth, solid warmth filled his hand. The grip small, like that of a child, but firm and reassuring.

"I'm here."

A touch caressed his brow, drawing his eyes closed. Rol'ei's grip on even the dark slipped from his fingers like sand.

“Beeooteasul. What does that mean?”

“A word in my language. It means... a pleasure to look at."

He fought to gaze again at that strange double creature. How can one have words for pleasure, for beauty, when their Dreams held so little, the emptiness so massive and heart-breaking.

He felt the answer shimmering in those strange eyes, at once golden then green, then both at once. If only he had the heart to pluck it out of the sky to give it to him.

Exhausted, he felt his eyelids drift closed once more. Small hands touched his body, curling him around a familiar warmth, before drifting away.

“Don't leave.”

They returned, touching his shoulder and neck briefly before the touch of that cool smoothness pressed against his shoulder.

Finally, he let his mind slip back into that dreadful oblivion.

* * *

When he finally woke, he had a long moment of confusion. His head felt clear, clearer than he'd ever experienced after a night of seeking true Dreams. However, he couldn't remember walking to the dreamwalker's sleeping area.

His hand held Ted's, tight enough his fingertips felt numb. A warm arm wrapped around his chest; the comforting feeling of sleeping with a group nearly lulling him back... but the primitive fear of returning to a dark realm half remembered kept him from closing his eyes.

Rol'ei forced his stiff body to move slowly, lest he shove his sleeping companion off of the narrow cot. He touched Ted's chin, turning his face up. He wondered when the dreamwalker would awaken, their sleep so strange and deep.

Never before had the Singer sought the true Dreams without a connection, without using tsahaylu to bond with Eywa or another member of the people or Ratche, his ikran. He should have connected with the dreamwalker, led them both to the Tree of Voices so that he could guide him into the songs of the past...

"Good morning."

Rol'ei jerked up, surprised by the tawtute behind him. The toothy grin finally helped him recognize Ted within the strange pinkish flesh.

"Ted."

"Yes," he said, still smiling, "Although I thought we went over that last night, I suppose you don't remember. How are you feeling?"

He considered it a moment; he didn't feel as quick as normal, his mind lingering on Ted's comments before he could think on his own body. Had he been with him in the Dream? Had they connected, somehow?

"Thirsty," he said, finally.

"That's to be expected, after that much to drink." The little tawtute stood. Somehow, even after the strange Dream, Rol'ei had a difficult time seeing Ted's beautiful lean blue body as the same person who stood before him. "Wait a moment, and I'll come back and we can both get some breakfast."

His cheeks turned red, his eyes traveling up and down Rol'ei's body.

"Clothes too."

Rol'ei raised his hand to stop him, but the small man had already disappeared down the steps, making for the alien stone buildings. He sighed and let his body slide back down onto the cot. Perhaps now wouldn't be the best time to try to see the insides yet. He didn't have the heart to face anymore dark, tawtute sickened places.

He turned back to Ted's body, not so much asleep he now remembered, but not occupied. A ghost... not quite dead, but waiting for its spirit to return.

With a careful hand, he smoothed away some limp strands of hair, gently traced the lines he had painted the day before, sought any sign of the spirit the body held... waited for. The body breathed, his heart beat a pure, strong rhythm, a great drum within the narrowly muscled chest.

Curiosity fired within his belly. He had noticed subtle differences before, but with Ted not reacting, his fingers quested farther; he examined the strange fifth fingers on his hands, the way the lines in his palms looked different, the way his toes looked a bit smaller, closer together, even though if he held his foot next to the dreamwalker's, his looked quite a bit more narrow. His skin looked a bit different, warmer in tone. He'd noticed how blood came up to the surface of his face easily, a trait his smaller body seemed to follow.

For a moment, his hand hovered over the tie of his loincloth, tempted to closely examine other differences, ones he'd noticed in passing while he'd prepared Ted for the ceremony, even though he had not done anything of the like since his childhood.

Instead, he cupped the curved cheek again. All of the dreamwalkers looked different from the people, but in different ways. The most common, he noticed, was the nose and ears; Ted had a narrower nose, with a bit more character at the bottom than, say Torukmakto had. His ears smaller as well, and less expressive... his smile made up for that flaw.

Rol'ei opened one eye with his fingers, gently, and looked into the vacant depth. He could see, now that his nose very nearly touched the Dreamwalkers, that there were indeed small sparks of alien green within the gold.

Existing, and not, within the same body. One-in-the-same. Realizations from his walk in the Dreams came back to him, along with a painful ache within his heart. Such loneliness.

He didn't quite know when it happened, when Ted returned to him, but between one heartbeat and the next, he went from holding an empty shell, to embracing another man... holding his eye open and examining him.

Ted didn't say anything, just stayed still underneath him.

Taboo.

Not exactly taboo, but suddenly he felt the shame as if he had been doing something forbidden. Sleeping with others, for warmth, for comfort, to feel a part of the tribe, meant nothing. Where did such a feeling come from?

He released Ted's eye, wondering.

Again, the Dreamwalker's skin changed colors. Rol'ei's fingers traced the flare without a thought, marveling at the purplish cover tinting his cheeks, his throat... where ever he touched was quickly followed by the change. Even his lips.

"Rol'ei.. I..."

"Hey boys!"

Rol'ei looked up at the woman, the Dreamwalker m'dic from before.

"Good morning, Lisa," Rol'ei greeted, using the phrase Ted had used.

"I'm not interrupting anything, am I?"

Ted pulled himself up into a sitting position, then wobbly to his feet.

"Whoa," she said, the strange sound amusing the Singer. "Easy. Your body probably isn't ready for that yet."

Ted remained awkwardly standing, very still, facing the fine mesh wall, away from them. Rol'ei and Lisa exchanged a glance.

"Do you remember where the rainwater collectors are? The barrels?"

Rol'ei nodded, not exactly sure he knew the words she stated but understanding they needed privacy. Uncertainty burbled in his stomach as he went outside. His feet brought him to a large container, a vague memory of pulling Ted from it swam to the surface. He cupped his hands and drank deeply.

The two of them seem quite comfortable with each other... perhaps they are mated?

Rol'ei shook his head. If they were, why would it matter to him?

He planted his palms on the rim of the stiff container, facing his rippling reflection in the water. Here, away from the forest, the morning had an eerie quiet calm. Other than the quiet murmurs of the two dreamwalkers talking to one another.

He closed his eyes, tried to focus on listening to their words... clear enough, but not in a language he could understand. Then, retching. His hands tightened into fists at the sound of Ted being sick up in the cabin.

After a few, painful, silent moments, Lisa came down with a bundle of green and tan in her arms.

"These are for you," she said, quietly. "He said you guys left your clothing at the celebration last night."

"I don't need them," Rol'ei said, not exactly meeting her gaze.

"Ted thought the boots helped you yesterday."

He mad a non-committal noise.

A cool hand touched his forehead.

"No fever. You don't look as bad off as he does. Are you feeling sick to your stomach?"

"Like him? No."

Rol'ei turned away from the dreamwalker and headed into the forest. His feelings in turmoil, and not knowing why, he wanted, needed, to be surrounded by the beautiful forest. To see Ratche and see if she could fly with him, needed to feel that connection with someone. As soon as he felt the soil give beneath his feet, he began to run. The wound in his leg burned. The soles of his feet ached in a strange, disconnected way. He ran until he couldn't feel any of it anymore, until he was deep in the forest and could climb up high enough that his ikran might be able to hear him.

He batted tears away from his eyes as he whistled for her. Peeled the strange false skin from his feet as he waited. Right now, he wanted nothing of the strangers.

She came, Eywa bless her. She nuzzled into his shoulder, knowing his distress before he connected with her. With a painful whoop, they took off into the air, both hurting enough that they couldn't fly as fast, or as far, as either would like, but the wind, and the sun, and Eywa's great presence eased some of the ache.

* * *

Ratche circled back to where she had been roosting on her own; a common enough habit when Rol'ei's mind was elsewhere. He noticed, with a frown, that she'd made sure her spot was far away from the others. She trilled to them, but they hissed and went back to their small bickering.

Even with their flock at home, she was a bit of an outsider, but here her bigger, ocean body, with its larger, more dramatic markings made her stand out more than usual.

Before he disconnected with her, he motioned a pack of small children playing over. He showed the youngest where she liked to be scratched and smiled with delight as all the others swarmed his ikran.

He didn't know if it was all the time he spent singing, or with her in the realm of dreams, or just her own personality, but he'd never met a friendlier one. And she loved the younglings. A time or two he'd caught the younger members of his tribe climbing on her back. She didn't connect or fly with them, but happily romped on the ground in strange little hops.

Rol'ei suddenly wished he'd brought some of her toys for the kids to play with. Her favorite game they couldn't do, tossing a toy made of rags over the cliffs and into the surf for her to dive after, but maybe her ball....

He left her to their surprised delight and wandered the camp.

His feet took him to a familiar fire site; it took the Singer a moment to remember why.

"Hello, Great Singer," he matron from... was it really only last night? ...greeted him.

He nodded to her and sat with his fingers to the fire, feeling cold all over.

"I don't have anything fresh ready right now... but that look in your eye tells me you haven't returned to my fire for food."

"Look in my eye?"

She nodded and sat next to him, offering him a water skin. He took it gratefully and took a swig.

"I've seen some powerful Tsahiks and Singers in my time, youngling." Rol'ei smiled, not having been called that in ages. "And I know the look of someone who has walked in Dreams and received perhaps a painful message."

Rol'ei dripped his head, his hand covering his eyes.

"Perhaps Mo'at would be of help to you-"

"No! No, it is nothing. It was just not what I expected."

The older Omaticaya nodded, sagely, prodding a rock into the fire pit with a toe.

"In this clan, when a Singer, or a Shaman, or a new hunter, wishes to preform that ceremony, they remain close. Perhaps they even remain at the Utral Aymokriya so that they might commune with Eywa and the voices of the past."

Rol'ei nodded. That had been his intention.

"Where is your student?"

"My student?"

"Your 'little singer,' the others are calling him. The dreamwalker. He left early last night, you followed, and now he is not with you."

"He is with his own kind."

"Ah, I see. So, after last night, he is no longer your student?"

He couldn't deny that's what he'd been spending most of his time today thinking about.

The older woman clucked her tongue disappointingly. "Surely what you saw in the dream couldn't have been that bad, hm? What could Eywa say that would make you turn so quiet and angry today."

"I am not angry."

"Oh? Hmph." She stood, using his shoulder to brace herself, then patted him on the top of the head like a child. "Well, if you are giving him up as a student, you should tell him at least, so he understands why he has offended the Great Singer of the Ikran Clan, for surely no one here understands it."

He watched her, and she gathered a bundle of cordage.

"You might as well go home, for that matter."

"Go home?"

She nodded. "Yes, go home. You've closed yourself up, I've seen it enough to know the signs. The Omaticaya have no need for a singer who has pulled back from the world. We have healers and warriors enough to take care of the rest. Say your farewells and show us your tail."

With that she walked away from him. He groaned as he got up to follow.

"What do you mean I've closed up?"

She clunked a loosely closed fist against his temple. "In here." She tapped his heart. "And here. You've been hurt, or you're afraid of being hurt. Eywa showed you something you are afraid of, and so you pulled away from it."

"I am not afraid!"

"Oh? Hmph." She turned to where a cluster of older Omaticaya were assembling new looms. "I could have sworn you were afraid. I suppose I saw wrong. Why did you stay, when most of the ikran returned to the ocean?"

"I wanted to learn the story, the Song that waited for me here."

"Are all Songs easy?"

"Not in the learning, or the telling."

"Sometimes painful."

"Of course. A lesson hard learned makes for a better Song."

"Ah." She glanced up at him, a smile playing in her eyes.

He frowned and sighed.

"Go find your student, Great Singer. I doubt many others have the stomach to learn the song the dreamwalkers have to tell. It will be heard, but there will be a great song, if only one can sing it."

"When did you get to be so wise?"

She made a rude noise and shoved him gently in the shoulder. "Off with you. I've work to do."

* * *

Rol'ei walked back, rather than call Ratche again. The more rest he could give her, the faster she would heal. By the time he returned to the tawtute's compound, he felt like he needed the rest to heal himself.

He found a rock to sit on, and watched as a couple of the dreamwalkers, a pair he didn't know, worked in the area around the cabin. Here, the plants grew in unnaturally neat rows; a strange forest indeed.

"Ah, you're back."

Rol'ei glanced up at the m'dic, Lisa. He nodded.

"Feeling better?"

"Yes, and no. Where is Ted? I need to apologize."

"I'd say you do." Rol'ei blinked in surprise at the bitterness in her voice. She waved off back into the forest. "He's off gathering seeds. I have work to do."

With that she stalked off herself, her roundish rump swinging back and forth dramatically, her tail swishing angrily. Rol'ei considered following her a moment, then disappeared back into the brush, preferring to seek out his "student" alone.

* * *

He stalked his prey, wishing his thigh wasn't injured, or he was more skilled, but the dreamwalker took no notice of what Rol'ei considered to be noticeable scrambles on the trees.

He watched as Ted hiked through the forest, back in long pants, shirt, and over-shirt, even a hat now. Covering everything. Rol'ei frowned, wondered if he'd already washed off the dye from the night before. He couldn't see a single facial feature, thanks to that wide brim.

He clenched his hands against the rough bark of the tree he hid on... his fingers itched to take off all that damn clothing. ...Why did he want to take it off again? Why did it matter?

He shook his head and climbed down the tree.

Rol'ei wanted, needed, more time to untangle everything going on in his mind, in his belly, but the matron had the right of it. Whatever bothered him, he didn't understand it, and that was more a reason to poke it and explore the strangeness. Not run away.

He didn't necessarily sneak up on the dreamwalker, but when Ted finally saw him a myriad of emotions flickered across his expressive face within a moment. Did the Singer see joy? Hope? Certainly frustration... maybe....

"Rol'ei... how did you find me?"

The singer bit his lower lip, suddenly uncertain again. "Lisa told me you were looking for seeds. I simply followed where she pointed."

Ted turned and walked away. Rol'ei stood still, stunned that the dreamwalker would just dismiss him without a word. He had a long, pointed stick which he used to poke at the soil a few steps away, separating it so he could kneel and dig out a tuber.

"These roots only grow in the shade of the forest; we can't grow them in the garden. They're quiet delicious. ...so, why did you run away this morning?"

Rol'ei hesitantly followed, knelt beside him, thrust his hands into the soil to help push aside the crumbling dirt. Their fingers grazed as they worked. He couldn't meet Ted's eyes.

"You... turned your back, this morning, after I touched you. You were sick." Suddenly, everything came tumbling out of his mouth in an embarrassingly awkward mess. "Last night, I didn't explain the ceremony to you, I thought... you're an adult, I assumed you'd had some experience... when you ran away, I had to follow, and then you were gone before I could guide you in Dreams. I should have told you, kept you with me... I wanted to share something special with you, so you could experience Eywa and... instead... instead there was only darkness and loneliness and-"

"Rol'ei, it's okay. I was sick from that paste and the alcohol. This was the first time I drank in this body, and I chugged quite a lot of that fermented fruit to try to wash out the horrible taste from my mouth."

Rol'ei smirked a little, still couldn't look up. Not yet. "It does burn, doesn't it?"

Ted laughed. "That, my friend, is an understatement. Come on, I think I see another root bundle over there to harvest."

They replaced the soil they'd previously unturned, patted it down, and went to the next spot.

"I was angry."

"Angry?"

"At you, for running away. From turning away from a gift. From turning away from me. I wanted to show you something wonderful and... maybe learn a bit about you as well. I've preformed this ceremony many times, and I've always connected with someone, Eywa, or another member of my clan, or Ratche-"

"Ratche?"

"My ikran."

"Wait... you 'connect' with you're ikran, then... how was it you said, dreamed? As in, you let yourself go into a drugged stupor while she flew you?"

Rol'ei smiled. "She is not a mindless beast. She lived a long, healthy life before me, and would continue fine without me. When I go into the dream with her, she has the control. She allows me to travel with her, understand her mind as she flies, fishes. Everything is so different with her, I see through her eyes, I am her while she flies and I walk the dream."

"And, what, you wanted me to walk with you, connected to her?"

"No!" Rol'ei grabbed Ted's hand, stopping his nervous digging. "No. I wanted us both to connect to Utral Aymokriya... so I could touch you're mind, and you could touch mine." He frowned at the admission, nervous, and not quite knowing the why of it. "When I Dreamed last night, I wanted to walk with you. I wanted to see your world, truly see you....

"Instead, all I saw was smoke, empty destruction. Grey... sadness. Loneliness. Nothing connected, nothing felt right."

"That sounds like the world I left." Ted's hand gripped Rol'ei's tightly. "But this is my world now. Why..." He sighed, cupped Rol'ei's face in his hands so the Singer had no choice but stare into the dreamwalker's eyes. "Why did you want to connect with me? Did... does it have something to do with this morning?"

"With me storming off like a youngling who doesn't know his own heart?" Mind... mind, he meant to say mind. Why, of all times, couldn't he string together the right words?

"No, when you were..." Ted's thumbs stroked the Singer's cheeks. Rol'ei felt his heart race at the gentle touch.

A few alien words spilled from Ted's lips, so fast Rol'ei barely heard them, maybe "O-el?", before the dreamwalker's lips fell down on his.

Rol'ei froze, shocked. Ted had his eyes closed. His lips so soft... hands gentle along Rol'ei's cheek, one hand curling to cup the base of his skull... when he touched the tender spot where Rol'ei's queue began; he groaned in pleasure.

The dreamwalker slipped his tongue into Rol'ei's mouth, delving, probing, inviting the Singer to try the same. They sucked and nibbled, Rol'ei a quick enough study and hungry to taste, to feel...

His hands tugged urgently at the damn shirt Ted wore with its infuriating buttons; he'd popped two before Ted, chuckling, nimbly undid the rest. His hands traced along the dreamwalker's firm chest, up his shoulders, and slid the cloth down his arms and unceremoniously onto the ground. Rol'ei swallowed, his mouth dry, uncertain, panting hard and a touch dizzy.

Ted glanced around, then took Rol'ei's hand.

"Come on, let's find a tree to climb, or go back to the cabin. I'm not exactly comfortable doing this where predators can catch us unaware."

How he could climb at a time like this, Rol'ei couldn't guess, especially with boots on. He let the dreamwalker guide him up into a tree with very smooth skin, and let himself get perched on a branch wider than the cot Ted called his own.

Ted pushed him down onto his back, laid over him and their lips resumed their beautiful dance. Rol'ei threw his head back and gasped as Ted's questing tongue and teeth traveled down his neck, his chest, tantalized his nipples, sending bright shivers down his spine, down to...his fingers tangled in Ted's hair, holding him tight to his body.

"Rol'ei," he whispered, his voice urgent with his own need. "Rol'ei... have you ever done this before? With a man?"

The Singer shook his head; his eyes couldn't quiet focus on the man above him.

"Then we're going to do something special, since I don't have any lube on hand."

"Lube?" Rol'ei duplicated the sound, uncomprehending. The dreamwalker just shook his head, before returning to his ministrations. His sweeping tongue and kisses nearly distracted him Ted's hand awkwardly working at the buttons on his pants.

A warm hand slid between their bodies, deftly releasing Rol'ei's painfully hard dick from his loincloth. Ted's strong, alien hand pressed the throbbing fresh against the dreamwalker's bare stomach. Rol'ei's pleasured groan was cut short with the return of Ted's hot, moist lips. Rol'ei gripped hard on his shoulders as those lovely fingers stroked him firmly, knowingly.

Rol'ei's hips ground up against Ted's hot body, wanting more, needing more. He whimpered with the wanting. Ted's tongue rhythmically pushed into his mouth, thrusting in time with the strokes of his hand. Then, a small pause in his body, Ted shifted and a new heat mirrored his.

Rol'ei spared a glance down between their bodies, Ted's dick sprouting from the opening in the khaki pants, hard as stone and as alive as anything. Ted wrapped his long fingers around the both of them, squeezing their members together almost painfully. His hips seemingly thrust into that hand without him, goaded by nothing more than the heat and pressure from another man.

They clutched, kissed, and ground against one another desperately.

It felt so strange, feeling a hand gripping him, another body on him... a male body all hard planes and sharp edges... without truly connecting with him. There, and yet not. He groaned in frustration, his hand clenching against Ted's back, wanting to make him stop, wanting to push just a little farther.

Ted's thumb flicked over the tip of his cock, explored the sensitive ridges, stroked and toyed and built him up faster than the Singer had ever experienced.

When he came, it was a surprised explosion of release and emotion. He blinked several times, still panting hard and clutching Ted close. The dreamwalker's hand pumped a moment longer before he jerked still, his seed spilling out between their bodies. Rol'ei covered Ted's hand with his, milking the both of them for their last drops.

Rol'ei smiled up, enjoying the sight, the way the light cast the dreamwalker's face and body in shadow, his ribs working like a bellows. Ted captured his hands then, dragged them above their heads and kissed him hard on the mouth before collapsing heavily on top of him.

He moaned in pleasure, tried to memorize the smells of their mingled fluids, the feel of his body limp over him. They held each other tightly, arms and legs intertwined. Neither saying a word, for a very long time.

###################################################################################

http://indanthronecomics.deviantart.com/art/Naughty-192976125

###################################################################################

Eywa – the Spirit Mother, Goddess
Lisa – Lisa Furlan, medic and language expert
Rol'ei – Singer for the Ikran Clan
Ted – Edward Cera, Avatar ethnobotanist. A specialist in nutritional values of Pandoran plants.
Utral Aymokriya, Tree of Voices, the great spirit tree that the Omaticaya Clan has retreated to.
Tsahaylu (Ted commonly mis-says "the halo" without realizing it) - the bond/neural connection
Tsahik - shaman, matriarch
Tawtute – Sky People
Ikran (Banshee) – Four-winged flying mount, wingspan 13.9 meters (with Sea ikran easily reaching 15 or more)

###################################################################################