Succumb

Auhor's Note: The language spoken by Anakin is entirely made up. I based it on the fact that Shmi had a pronounced accent that said to me Basic wasn't her first language. There is no translation - I've left it up to the reader's imagination. If any word actually means something in some language, it's entirely coincidental.


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“He loves to sit and hear me sing,
Then, laughing, sports and plays with me;
Then stretches out my golden wing,
And mocks my loss of liberty.”

William Blake


He wanted to marry me.

I sat in stunned disbelief across the dining table from Anakin. He did not ask if I wanted to be his wife. Instead he nonchalantly announced that we would get married as soon as it could be arranged. There was no hesitancy in his attitude, no uncertainty in his words, just steely determination.

In all the times I had imagined what Anakin would say once he had me alone again, I never imagined that it would be about marriage. Being lovers would have been bad enough in the eyes of the Jedi, not to mention my family, but marriage? Unexpected bitterness filled my heart. The Jedi would never allow their Chosen One to break the all important Jedi Code.

I stared down at my plate of food with something akin to revulsion. The once appetizing smell was making me feel decidedly queasy and I pushed the plate away quickly before I embarrassed myself.

A rising tide of hysteria was threatening to engulf me and I had a momentary thought of throwing caution to the wind and enlisting Obi Wan’s help in dissuading Anakin. There would be no need to mention what had happened in the garage on Tatooine. It would be a simple request from a senator to a Jedi Master asking for his assistance in curtailing his Padawan’s youthful infatuation.

My hand that had been resting atop the table was swiftly seized in a vise-like grip and I whipped my head up to meet Anakin’s angry eyes.

“Don’t, Padmé.” He warned. “Don’t.”

I swallowed hard as his hold tightened and I could not hide the wince of pain that flashed across my face. Anakin frowned, looking down at the hand that imprisoned my wrist as if noticing for the first time what he was doing. Almost immediately he loosened his grip, his fingers massaging the circulation back into my hand.

I looked away guiltily. He had to know that I would never go to Obi Wan for help. If I were to tell his Master about the two of us, I might as well march into the Jedi Temple and inform the Council myself. I pulled my hand away from his as my mind raced for an argument that would bring Anakin to his senses.

It proved to be a futile effort.

Anakin would simply not listen to reason. None of the arguments that I presented swayed him from the insane course of action he was intent upon. When I told him that the Council would never allow him to marry, he echoed the suggestion he had made in front of the fire at the retreat on Naboo.

“They won’t object if they don’t know about it.”

Secrets! Lies! I could not live that way.

Anakin watched me with that intense gaze of his as I stood abruptly and began to pace the length of the dinning room. The muscles in my back and neck were tight with tension and I knew I was working myself up into one of my rare tempers. I came to halt when Anakin broke the deafening silence.

“You said you loved me. Was that a lie?” His voice was cold but I could hear the underlying hurt.

“You know it was not.” I said with my back to him.

With that irritating Jedi stealth he was suddenly behind me. I jumped as Anakin’s arms wrapped around me and he pulled me back against his chest. His shiny metal appendage was cold against my skin and I could not help but note how comfortable he already was with it. Anakin rested his chin atop my head and despite myself I started to relax back against him.

“Then we will get married.”

Sighing with exasperation, I disengaged myself from his embrace; mildly surprised that he let me go so easily. I turned sharply to face him, my hands resting on my hips, my eyes snapping with impatience.

“No, Anakin.”

My words were strong and determined; my expression resolute. Anakin narrowed his eyes at my defiant stance. Annoyance and irritation radiated off of him as he moved closer.

“I won’t let you throw what we have away. I won’t let you go.”

His words struck a chill in my heart. My entire life was spiraling out of control before my very eyes. I was being pushed relentlessly towards a murky future with a man who overwhelmed me at every turn. I loved Anakin, I wanted Anakin and I was frightened of Anakin. The intensity of our feelings for each other was all consuming; like a fire that burns too brightly before being extinguished forever.

A shaky sigh escaped me and I turned away from him again.

“I can’t.” I muttered under my breath, breaking from the formal speech pattern that had been drummed into me as Princess of Theed. “Please, I can’t.”

“Padmé….” He started in a conciliatory tone.

"Anakin, no!"

Deciding discretion was the better part of valor I turned and headed for the door.

“Where do you think you’re going?” Anakin demanded irritably.

Scooping up my data pad from the side table, I looked back at him over my shoulder.

“I cannot discuss this anymore, Anakin. I will be in the library catching up on my senatorial duties. I suggest you spend some time remembering that you have your own obligations to uphold.”

My tone was sharper than I intended but my nerves were frazzled and I could not help myself. An angry sneer sounded behind me.

“This isn’t over, Senator,” Anakin said, emphasizing my title. “It’s far from over.”

Those worrisome words resounded in my head long after the door had slid shut behind me. Issuing a challenge to Anakin was always a mistake.


****

Three hours in front of the HoloNet had given me nothing more than eye strain and a stiff neck. Turning the screen off, I laid my head down in my arms and wondered how much longer I could stand to be in such close quarters with Anakin. He had only been out of the sick bay for a few hours and already I felt that I was under siege. My nerves were stretched to the breaking point.

Anakin had proved to me that I was only fooling myself in thinking that I could handle and control my feelings for him. Never in my wildest dreams had I thought that physical desire could be so powerful that it ruled every aspect of one’s life. Who would have thought that my body would crave something that it had done so long without?

I laughed bitterly. Padmé Naberrie, so wise to the ways of the galaxy! I had always congratulated myself on being level headed enough to avoid romantic entanglements. How was I to have known that I had only done so because I had not met the man who could breach my defenses so effectively? I had tricked myself into thinking I was immune to mindless passion. Now I appeared to be ruled by it.

I sighed heavily, something I had started to do a lot of, and closed my eyes. I had done nothing constructive and I doubted I ever would as long as Anakin was in close proximity.

The sound of the library door opening startled me and set my teeth immediately on edge. Before I was even aware of doing so, I had stood up and turned around to face the person who had invaded my restless peace. I hoped for an officer who had discovered he needed to do some research for a report or even a clone trooper with a message for me. My heart rate increased dramatically when I saw it was Anakin. Had I really thought it would be anybody else?

The lights suddenly dimmed and the room was suffused in a murky darkness as Anakin stalked towards me like some cloaked marauder bearing down on his intended victim. It was not until he was right in front of me that I was able to see the expression on his face. My mouth went dry and my breath caught as I looked up at him.

Anakin was through talking.


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“Take me to you, imprison me, for I
Except you enthrall me, never shall be free,
Nor ever chaste, except you ravish me.”

John Donne


I stood there nervously, aware more than ever how isolated we were from the rest of the ship. I cursed myself for giving Anakin the opportunity to corner me in the one place where we were virtually guaranteed complete solitude. In my four days aboard the Coruscant's Pride, I had never seen anyone else in the library; in fact I had never even seen anyone in the general vicinity.

If there had been any remaining hope of a timely interruption it was dashed when I heard the beep-click of the lock as Anakin used the Force to secure the door. My eyes looked wildly from the now locked door back to Anakin’s intent face.

“Poor Padmé, no more Obi Wan to use as a shield, hmm?” Anakin said with a mocking smile.

My lower back pressed uncomfortably into the edge of the work table behind me as Anakin loomed over me. All my years of experience at political debate and public speaking evaporated as if they never existed and I could only stare up at him with wide eyes.

Anakin bent to place a hand on the table on either side of me, forcing me to lean back or have my face pressed into his chest. My hands grasped the table edge tightly to avoid toppling backwards. Those cobalt blue eyes burned into mine and my heart turned over in my chest.

“Take down your hair.” His tone was uneven and husky.

I stared at him mutely as if Basic were a language that I no longer understood. When I made no move to obey his command he repeated himself more forcibly, each word stressed individually.

“Take. Down. Your. Hair.”

A quiver of nervous excitement spiraled inside me which I quickly suppressed. I narrowed my eyes at him in resentment but he pretended not to notice.

“Do it or I’ll do it myself.”

Anakin made as if to follow through with his threat and I flinched back. I hesitated for a second but he read the defeat in my eyes and moved back slightly to give me room to do as he demanded. All the while his hungry eyes never strayed from my face.

My hands shook slightly as they seemed to reach up of their own volition to obey his command. I was rooted to the spot as I pulled one pin after another from my hair. Anakin’s gaze glowed with an inner fire that held me spell bound and my chest rose and fell with my increasingly jagged breathing.

When the last pin was removed and my brown curls had tumbled about my shoulders and down my back, Anakin sighed with pleasure; fanning my hair out around my face before leaning back in. Once again I found myself being forced backwards. I tried to brave my way out of that dangerous situation.

“Anakin, I do not have time for this.” I said.

I had meant to sound unconcerned but the effect was ruined when my voice came out weak and tremulous.

Anakin snorted with amusement and then with a swiftness that raised a startled cry from me, I was lifted off my feet by invisible hands and set down at the table’s edge. Anakin’s hands pushed my knees apart swiftly and he settled himself between my thighs.

“We belong together, Padmé. Why do you have to fight it?” His voice was low and seductive.

The emotions behind his question were achingly raw and a tremor ran down my spine as I looked up into his handsome face. I had no words with which to respond. The knowledge that he was right, that our fates were intertwined irrevocably, was something that I had fought against ever since I realized that I loved him. Anakin was my other half and I was his. Yet I could not escape the feeling that something terrible awaited us should we choose the wrong path.

//You said you were mine, Padmé//

I stiffened in outrage and offense at his mental violation. No one should have that much power, I thought angrily. I hardened my resolve even as my body sent the signals that it wanted to give in and surrender to his will, to his love. My lack of control over my own body and mind angered me.

“Do not do that!”

Anakin flashed me that infuriatingly smug smile that he had perfected. The delight he took in stripping away my habitual cool and poised exterior was palatable. He reveled in knowing he could reduce me to anger or passion - often with no more than a heated look or seductive smile.

I was horrified to find that I wanted nothing more than to give into the anger that he was inspiring and wipe that smirk off his face with the palm of my hand.

“I wouldn’t advise it if I were you. Once was quite enough.”

I gaped at him; his ability to know what I thought almost before I did was both maddening and frightening. Anakin’s arms stole around my back and pulled me up hard against his body. A wicked grin hovered on his lips and then his mouth descended to capture mine.

I defiantly kept my lips clamped tightly shut, resisting the pressure of Anakin’s mouth. He lifted his head sharply, all amusement having fled.

“Don’t make me hurt you, Padmé.” He said in a voice that promised retribution should I continue to resist.

When I remained stubbornly silent and continued to glare at him, he sighed in exasperation and shook his head at me as if I were a disobedient child. With surprising gentleness after his threat, Anakin merely pressed his lips lightly against mine once more. His tongue delicately traced the outline of my lips, attempting to coax them apart. But when I still refused to give way he growled in disapproval and bit down hard on my lower lip. An involuntary gasp of pain gave him the opening he had been looking for and instantly his tongue slid inside to ravish my mouth. My cries of protest were swallowed and I struggled to keep my mouth from softening beneath the passionate onslaught.

My pride would not allow me to cede and I squirmed violently, pummeling my fists against his shoulders and back and finally pulling wildly at his hair. I had no reservations about fighting back this time. As far as I was concerned this was self-defense. When I yanked hard on his braid I was rewarded with a grunt of pain. My small victory was all too brief.

Anakin retaliated quickly. With a painful wrench my arms were pulled behind me and pinned firmly to the table with unseen bonds. Immediately Anakin’s lips became brutal, taking what he wanted without thought or consideration. His tongue drove in, swirling around mine in a ruthless attack. Anakin overpowered me with his wanton desire and I felt an answering response rise from deep within me. Shame swept over me when I realized that I was actually enjoying, no reveling, in the loss of control. The fiery wanting consumed any objections or scruples that I may have still had and I was giving myself over to Anakin in the most basic way. I moaned into his mouth in surrender and Anakin responded by pulling me closer, continuing to kiss me breathless.

And then he stopped, pulling back unexpectedly, looking down at my flushed face with eyes heavy with desire. My body shuddered and I frantically gulped for air.

“Marry me.”

I stared blankly at him, trying to gather my scattered wits about me. My head was swimming but I finally managed to get the word out through swollen lips.

“No.”

His expression was calculating as he continued to study me and then he threaded his fingers through my hair to pull my head back none to gently. A muttered curse rang in my ears and then he attacked my neck with frenzied abandon, his lips trailing a path of fire. I cried out as he nipped hard at the sensitive skin before drawing it sharply, almost painfully, into his mouth. He worried the tender flesh with his tongue, sucking so hard that I knew I would have to hide the mark for days. Anakin’s mouth was everywhere at once and the incoherent cries rose unbidden from me. Hot breath caressed my ear, sharp teeth scraped along my collarbone and then his lips moved lower.

Anakin’s free hand moved to my breasts and I could do nothing to stop him from undoing the lacing that held the sides of my bodice together. My back arched of its own accord as his tongue dipped between the valley of my breasts before moving to tease first one and then the other hardened peak.

I heard someone whispering ‘please, please’ over and over in that darkened room. It was with both shock and dismay that I realized that it was my voice I was hearing; my voice that was imploring Anakin to continue.

He lifted his head from my aching breasts, using his tight grip in my hair to bring my face level with his. My entire body was trembling with need as our eyes met and held for what seemed like an eternity. Within the blue depths I could read the intensity of his love, and his desire, and I knew that he saw the same in mine. He bent his head and I thought he was going to kiss me again until I became aware that his hand had worked its way under my skirt and between my thighs.

My breath hissed harshly and my entire body jerked as Anakin touched me in a way that he had only hinted at that night on Tatooine. Each touch, each stroke was slow and deliberate, eliciting moans and soft mewling cries from deep within me. I was only marginally aware that Anakin was watching me intently, gauging my reaction and moving his fingers against me accordingly. I shut my eyes as sweet pressure built inside of me. But Anakin would not let me escape him, just as he had done that night, he demanded my full attention.

“Open your eyes, Padmé, or I’ll stop. Do you want me to stop?” His voice was thick and almost unrecognizable as he watched me writhe against him.

Anakin’s hand fell still and my eyes flew open in panic. He laughed in quiet triumph before beginning his slow, steady circling again. Anakin’s hot gaze held mine, refusing to allow me to look away. I lost myself in the whirling vortex of deep blue as he continued his decadent ministrations. Until that moment, I never knew that love and lust were so intertwined.

I gasped in shock when Anakin slid two fingers inside me, instantly finding and repeatedly moving against a spot I had never known existed. Reflexively my hips began to move in time with his finger thrusts, all the while his thumb continued to circle and stroke me. As the delicious pressure within continued to build to an unbearable level, I was losing all touch with reality.

“Tee’ana et na loska milé tu’et.” Anakin said huskily.

The language he spoke was unknown to me yet oddly familiar in that I felt the key to comprehension lurked just below the surface of my consciousness. And then it struck me that he was speaking the language of his mother’s people. It was something that he rarely did.

Anakin whispered the phrase over and over until it seemed that there were a thousand voices chanting it in a continuous round. The words invoked something dark and primal deep within my being, something that frightened me in its wildness. I fought a wave of dizziness at the hypnotizing cadence of Anakin’s words.

//Ple’ana et kon na kile’ah su nom l’keer//

I was past caring about the invasion of my mind as Anakin’s voice wove a spell in my head. I let the words wash over me as I was pulled further down into a world where I did not think but simply reacted.

Overwhelmed and almost senseless with desire and sheer need, my head fell back and my breath came in short, sharp bursts. Anakin growled with satisfied approval and his teeth and tongue found my breasts again. Then my hands were free and I fell back upon the table, hitting my head hard on the unforgiving surface. I bit my lip with a whimper of pain and was instantly soothed by Anakin.

“Sssh, ce’yana tu soleen na.”

Anakin slipped a hand beneath the small of my back and raised me up. He murmured unintelligibly against my heated skin as I clawed desperately at the slick table top trying to find something with which to anchor myself.

Anakin increased his efforts, relentlessly driving me towards the edge of the unknown and then my body jerked forward as a wondrous cry was ripped from me. I clutched his leather vest, holding on for dear life, something exploding deep inside of me. Intense waves of pleasure racked my body and I cried out Anakin’s name, almost sobbing at the exquisite sensations coursing through me. Anakin held me to him as my body shuddered repeatedly, riding out the intense ripples of pleasure.

When the light and heat had subsided, I slumped against him in exhaustion, burying my damp face in the crook of his neck, my hands tangled in his hair. The only sound in the quiet room was my ragged breathing and an occasional soft sob as Anakin stroked my back and whispered those alien words against my bowed head.

“Et na kile’ah su bey nom teir.”

Anakin slowly withdrew his hand from between my legs, his eyes commanding my full attention. I watched in a daze as he lifted his hand to his lips and slowly licked the two fingers that he had just used to bring me to such incredible heights. Shock coursed through me at the primal act. My rather sheltered background had not prepared me for either the action itself or the surge of lust that I felt in response. I whimpered softly and my body reacted with another rush of wet heat between my legs. When Anakin finished removing the taste of me from his fingers, he bent to twirl his tongue in my ear before murmuring one last thing.

“Ti am y’ettu, Padmé. Tee'ana kile'ah.”

I was physically and emotionally wrung out and could only watch numbly as he smoothed my skirt down and laced up the front of my gown with an almost professional detachment. He tilted my chin upwards, standing there without speaking for a long moment. I looked at him with glazed eyes, still breathing harder than normal. Nothing in my life had prepared me for what had just happened. My mind was still spinning when Anakin tenderly drew the back of his hand down my damp, flushed cheek.

Then without a word Anakin turned on his heel and left me. I stared after him in disbelief and confusion, unable to form a coherent thought or word.

I sat for I know not how long on that hard table, reeling from one of the most intense experiences of my life. Confusion and desire warred inside my head. I could not decide if I should be pleased at the pleasure Anakin had just given me or angry that he had walked away afterwards as if I were a toy to be played with at his discretion.

I buried my face in my hands.

Oh gods, I did not know what to do.

Just the thought of attempting to summon the strength I would need to walk away from him was daunting. And I was no longer sure that strength was all it would take.

It was becoming patently clear that no one walked away from Anakin Skywalker unless he let them.