Jack's Descent

A/N - FINALLY!! As before, I am SO sorry for taking forever and a year to update, but inspiration was not coming for this chapter at ALL. It was hard to get in the "groove", so hopefully this was worth the long wait!

WARNING: Semi-graphic sexual content, violence, etc.

CH 8: Unbreaking the Habit

When Rachel finally came to, her head was fuzzy and pounding like a stampede of elephants. What had the Joker given her?

Groaning in pain, Rachel moved to get up, but that's when she realized she was tied to a chair in a dark and dingy room. In front of her stood a tripod with a blinking camera, her eyes narrowing once she noticed sheets of paper with instructions on what she should say.

"En-joy-ing my lit-tle set-up?"

Jumping in surprise, Rachel felt a wave of nausea bubble within her when the Joker made his grand appearance, her mouth opening to speak just as she realized her mouth was securely taped shut.

"Hmm? What was that, beautiful?" Cupping his ear, the Joker leaned forward and mockingly urged, "I'm afraid that you'll, uh...have to speak up!"

When Rachel's muffled curses reached his ears, the clown prince shrieked with laughter before ripping the tape from her mouth, her cry of pain delighting him as he crouched down at her feet and grinned. "I, uh...hope you've got a voice for television, beautiful, because in mo-ments we'll be live on GCN! Just think of it, precious: you'll get to announce my latest game! Isn't that just ut-ter-ly or-gas-mic?"

As he giggled and bounced about like a child, Rachel glared down at him with a growing fury within her breast. This man -- no, this monster -- had taken away all that she'd ever loved, and now he thought he could use her as a pawn in one of his mind games?

Seething and glaring daggers at her ruthless captor, Rachel reared her leg back and tried to nail him in the shin, but the Joker easily side-stepped her pitiful attack and giggled.

"Ooh-hoo-hoo, you wanna play, do ya?" he eagerly taunted, his gloved hand whipping out his knife as he seized a fistful of her hair and yanked her forward. Sitting down in her lap and bouncing his feet on the floor, the Joker grinned his trademark grin before tracing the tip of his blade along Rachel's cheek. The movement wasn't hard enough to draw blood, but it was definitely capable of arousing fear within his captive's breast.

Wrapping a lock of Rachel's hair around his finger, the Joker clicked his tongue and regrettably shook his head. "Well where'd the spunk all go, hmm, beautiful? You were doing so well! You tried to nail me where it hurts, but now you're just going to sit there and gawp at me like a fool?" When Rachel defiantly chose not to answer him, the Joker irritably opened his hand and struck her clear across the face. "There, that oughta cure you of your speechlessness -- I mean, I know I'm dashingly handsome and all, but this is just getting ri-dic-u-lous!"

Feeling tears forming along her lashes, Rachel tried her best to be hostile as she demanded, "Well what is it you want from me? You mentioned at the hospital that you needed me to get to Harvey, but I fail to see how this is going to help you achieve your stupid plan."

The Joker rolled his eyes. "Oh, honey bunch, don't you ever use your ima-gin-a-tion? I don't have plans, because I just do things... Your lit-tle Harvey is a schemer just like all the rest of them, and look where that got him. I have his lit-tle bunny in my hold, and now the only thing he can do is wait for darkness to claim him as it oh so buh-less-ed-ly claimed me."

"You're a monster" Rachel declared, the tears finally streaming down her cheeks. "First you took Jack from me, and now you're trying to take Harvey? Well I won't let you, do you hear me? I won't!"

Cackling with glee over her enthusiastic response, the Joker giddily clapped his hands before bouncing up and down in her lap. "Ooh, I hope you do, beautiful, I hope you do -- if you didn't try and stop me, what would be the point? And heck, if you could get that wing-ed rodent to join in on the fun, it'd be perfect!" Giggling and rocking about like a metronome, the clown prince tweaked her nose before purring, "So how about it, huh, beautiful? You just read the cards, Harvey comes out to play my lit-tle game, and then we all win!"

"Um, how about I say no, Harvey comes and rescues me, and then you go to Arkham Asylum!" Rachel snarled, her tirade being cut short the moment the Joker shoved his blade in her mouth.

"Y'know, you're so much prettier when you smile, and I think I can rem-e-dy that" he purred, his dark eyes swimming with madness as he watched a ruby droplet trickle from the wound on her mouth. Licking it up with a pleased groan, the Joker began petting Rachel's hair as she trembled and squeezed her eyes shut, his lips at her ear as he whispered, "Let's put a smile on that face, shall we?"

Whimpering, Rachel moved to pitifully plea her case when the Joker suddenly growled, his hand dropping the blade as he tore at his hair and snarled between clenched teeth. Watching this display in utter bewilderment, Rachel winced when he gracelessly rolled off her lap and onto the floor, drool dribbling past his lips as he clutched his head and kicked his feet like a child with a temper tantrum.

"No, no, no, no!" he whined, "I'm not fin-ished yet!" Convulsing as if he'd just stuck his finger in an electrical socket, the Joker went completely still and laid there like a painted cadaver.

Biting her lip amidst her tears, Rachel lifted her leg and nudged him with the tip of her shoe, but he failed to respond to her poking and prodding. Heart pounding in her chest like a boxing glove, she moved to nudge him again, but that's when the Joker suddenly shot up with a start, his eyes wide and mouth agape as he desperately gasped for air.

"Jack?" Rachel pressed, her eyes full of fear.

Now turning his dark gaze to rest upon hers, the Joker looked the attorney over as if he'd never seen her in all his life, his tone soft and bewildered as he rasped, "Rachel? My God, what happened?"

"N-nothing, I just... Are you ok?"

Rubbing his head, Jack winced as he sat up and turned to face his former lover, his eyes widening once he took in the sight of her bruised and bloody appearance. "Rachel, you're bleeding!" he exclaimed, his shaky form tripping as he struggled to his feet and rushed to her aid. Wiping the scarlet bloom from her lip, he then hurriedly began untying her bonds so she could finally move, his voice notably strained as he demanded, "Did I do this to you? Oh God, I did, didn't I? I can tell by your face!"

Rachel winced, her eyes promptly dropping to the floor as she whispered, "Jack, please take off that make-up...I can't stand looking at that creature any more."

Jolting as if he'd been slapped, Jack reached up and shuddered when he felt the telltale face paint upon his chin, his teeth gritting as he reached into his pocket and fetched a handkerchief. He couldn't bear the fact that Rachel hated the very sight of him, but he knew he couldn't blame her since the war paint made him a monster. The idea that he wasn't himself while applying it made him shiver, his hands making quick work of removing the make-up as Rachel continued to stare at her shoes. By God, couldn't she even look at him? Feeling his heart sink, Jack began to scrub his face with more vigor -- he needed to be clean of that monster...he needed to be rid of him! Feeling the burn of his aggravated flesh, Jack ignored the pain and chafing of his scars, tears blinding his vision as Rachel shouted and pleaded with him to stop.

"No" he whispered, scrubbing more furiously, "he's still there..."

"Jack, stop it!" Rachel shrieked, her hands grasping his wrists as she leapt up and restrained him. When her eyes met with his, she tearfully took the handkerchief from Jack's hands and puled him into her arms. Gently stroking the tangled green of his hair, she fought back more tears as she whispered, "Now that you're ok again, I think you should know that I've decided to leave Gotham."

Jack visibly stiffened. "What do you mean? When did you decide this?"

"When I was in the hospital after my rape... I knew that as long as I was here, both Harvey and I would be in grave danger. Judging by our present situation, I'd say that I was right."

"But where will you go? I don't like the idea of you being away from my protection..."

"Your protection?" Rachel laughed bitterly, her hand coming over her eyes as she asked, "Are you kidding me? Jack, you're the whole reason why I'm leaving! If you'd just agree to see a doctor, this whole problem could be prevented!"

"You don't know that" Jack irritably shot back, his eyes growing dark over the thought of losing her. "Just hear me out, ok? My Aunt and Uncle have a farm about two hours away from here. If I send you there, they'll be more than willing to take care of you until you're ready to come back."

Rachel sighed. "Jack..."

"No, listen to me! Their house is the safest place for you I can think of, not to mention I shouldn't be able to remember where you are as the Joker" Jack fervently insisted. "If you agree, I can call up Craig and get him to drive you over there right now. With any luck, you'll arrive at the farm before nightfall."

Chewing on the inside of her lower lip, Rachel bowed her head and reluctantly nodded. "Alright" she agreed, "I'll go to the farmhouse, but first I need to call Harvey to let him know what's going on."

"No!" Jack feverishly argued, "We can't have anyone know about this but Craig -- the more people who know, the more likely I'll end up finding out. Got it?"

Rachel sighed and nodded, her lips pressing into a grim line as she touched his arm. "Well, I guess this is goodbye, then..."

"It doesn't have to be" Jack pathetically argued.

"No, maybe not, but until you get the help you need, I'm afraid we won't be seeing each other." Straightening her stance, Rachel coolly added, "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go call Craig so he can come and pick me up."

Watching Rachel leave as if their separation were the easiest thing in the world, Jack dug his nails into his palms until they bled, his fury bursting forth as he turned and knocked over Rachel's chair with a violent shove. Damn her for always being right, and damn him for loving her! Sinking down to his knees, Jack grasped at his hair just as he caught sight of his soiled handkerchief, the smeared war paint seemingly mocking him as he balefully narrowed his eyes.

"I won't let you win" he snarled. "This ends tonight!" Seizing his knife from off the floor, Jack determinedly rose to his feet and left with the hopes of making his sacrifices worthwhile.

--

"So why do you want to make a getaway to a farm, again?" Craig demanded, his derisive gaze training upon Rachel as he continued to drive. "I mean, c'mon Rach, if you really needed a break from the office, why not just take a trip to the Bahamas? I'm sure there'd be plenty of manly, scantily-clad natives willing to rub coconut oil all over your body."

Rachel rolled her eyes. "Craig, did anyone ever tell you what a pig you are?"

"Well sure, but it always means so much more to me when it comes from you, Rachel" he teased.

Laughing, the two drifted into an amiable silence before Craig decided to turn on the radio. The Hues Corporation blared out through the speakers as he (quite poorly) sang along, "Up to now we've sailed through every storm, and I've always had your tender lips to keep me warm..." Pausing, Craig looked over at Rachel before revealing, "Y'know, I never really understood that line -- why's the guy wanna make a coat out of his girlfriend's lips?"

Rachel smothered a giggle and shook her head. "Craig, you are such a dork, but I guess that's why I love you."

He gave a mocking gasp. "Why, Rachel Elizabeth Dawes! I had no idea you harbored romantic feelings for me!"

"Craig..."

"I mean, I know I'm a big stud and all, but..."

"Craig! Shut up and slow down, you goon, you're going to miss our stop!"

Abruptly slamming down on the breaks, Craig smiled sheepishly before acknowledging, "Well I'll be damned, we really are here! And not a moment too soon, either... I'm starving!"

"Are you kidding me? You can't just invite yourself to dinner!"

"Well why not? You invited yourself here to live" Craig snidely shot back.

Not wishing to explain her decision, Rachel hugged herself for support as they turned down a gravel driveway leading to an old farmhouse. A middle-aged woman sat on the front porch knitting socks, her features brightening as she raised a hand and waved.

Giving her a one-fingered salute, Craig grinned over at Rachel before revealing, "Well damn, maybe this won't be so bad after all -- if you need any new clothes, that knitting machine over there can just make you something to wear!"

"Craig, you are such a jerk."

He grinned. "Well true, but at least I'm a jerk who thinks ahead." Putting the car into park, he cut off the ignition as the woman rose to her feet, Rachel smiling weakly as she got out of the car and uneasily made her way to the porch.

"Hello" she greeted, "my name is Rachel Dawes, and this is a good friend of mine, Craig Stephenson."

The woman beamed, her starry eyes twinkling as she brushed back a lock of graying chestnut. "Why yes, yes, of course it's you" she eagerly acknowledged. "Sweet little Jack -- God rest his soul -- would talk about you all the time when he'd come to visit. I'll admit I was rather surprised to hear you wanted a tour, but whoever called me seemed so insistent that I couldn't very well say no." Smiling, she warmly added, "My name is Maria Wallace, by the way."

Rachel balked. Jack hadn't even told his favorite relatives that he was still alive? Quickly recovering from her astonishment, Rachel straightened her stance before returning, "Oh, well it's very nice to meet you... I-I wanted to see the one place that Jack spoke so fondly of, so you're right, I suppose I did have to see the place. Judging by the way he described your home, it truly sounded like a little piece of heaven."

"Well my definition of a 'little piece of heaven' is pie" Craig rudely spoke up, grinning as he prayed the woman would get his meaning.

Laughing at the imploring look on Craig's face, Mrs. Wallace smiled as she returned, "Well my husband isn't quite done in the fields just yet, but if you'd like to come inside for some pie, I suppose I can accomodate you."

Winking at Rachel as they were led indoors, Craig admired the interior as they entered a rather small, practical little kitchen.

"The children are upstairs finishing their chores, but they should be down for supper when it's ready" Mrs. Wallace added, a bright smile crossing her lips as she took the foil off the pie. "The girls are so thrilled about meeting you, Rachel -- they loved their cousin Jack like a big brother, so any reminder of the man he once was should bring joy to their hearts."

Rachel smiled weakly, but the warmth never quite reached her eyes. Oh God, how could she possibly face these three girls without bursting into tears? The very thought of speaking to them made her want to retch, so as she woozily swayed from side to side, she grabbed onto a nearby chair and anxiously looked up at her hostess. "M-Mrs. Wallace?" she uneasily began, "May I please be excused until supper?"

Mrs. Wallace appeared rather surprised by this request, but she nodded her consent as Craig eagerly took the offered pie from her hands.

"You feelin' ok, Rach?" he asked, his voice lacking true concern as he shoveled the dessert into his mouth.

When Rachel nodded, she suddenly caught sight of a fairly old picture hanging on the wall, her breath catching in her throat once she realized it was Jack and Penny before the accident. With tears burning along her lashes, she gave a miserable "Excuse me" and placed a hand over her mouth, both Craig and Mrs. Wallace watching on in bewilderment as Rachel left the room sobbing

--

After dinner and Craig's inevitable departure, Rachel found herself standing out back on the long, scenic wrap-around porch to the Wallace home. The skies were dark, drab and grey, but she found a certain comfort in the steady rhythm of the rain as it beat against the rooftop.

Bringing her wine glass up to her lips, Rachel reflected on her evening with a bittersweet smile. The three Wallace children -- Amy, Nora, and Mikayla -- had all been very warm and sweet to her, so she couldn't entirely understand why she'd been so terrified by the idea of meeting them. Perhaps she'd been afraid of seeing the 'normal' Jack in their features, but thanks to the entertaining company of both Craig and the Wallace's, she didn't get a single chance to reflect on Jack or search for any likenesses.

"Rachel, sweetheart?"

Looking up with a start, Rachel smiled before greeting, "Oh, well hello, Mrs. Wallace... Is there something I can do for you?"

"Well" she sweetly began, "there's a visitor who says he has something very important to tell you -- should I send him in?"

Thinking it was Craig with some ridiculous story that he thought was 'important', Rachel nodded and smiled as the middle-aged woman turned and left. The moment a familiar man took her place, however, Rachel's expression of warmth immediately vanished.

"No..."

Dropping her wine glass with a start, Rachel barely even reacted to the shattered glass as Jack slowly approached her, the blue of her eyes narrowing as she snapped, "How dare you come all the way out here...we had an agreement!"

"I'm so sorry, Rachel, but I just had to..."

"No" she hotly interrupted, "you stay away from me!"

"Rachel please, I..."

"Stay away!"

Turning from from Jack without another word, Rachel pushed open the screen door and went racing out into the pouring rain, wet droplets clinging to her hair and skin as she implored her legs to go faster. Jack wasn't wearing his horrendous face paint, but the determined look in his eyes had been more than enough to frighten her.

"Rachel!" Jack hollered, his voice getting lost amidst the roaring thunder, "Rachel, stop!"

"Leave me alone!" she shouted heatedly in response, a sharp cry escaping her lips once she felt his hand clamp firmly about her elbow.

Whipping her around so she was forced to face him, Jack gazed pleadingly into her eyes as his grasp softened ever-so-slightly, his thumb now tracing along her soft skin as he confessed, "I'm sorry for being so selfish Rachel, but I know I'm kidding myself if I think I can stay away from you without going crazy. I-I love you, and I just want to be here with you for the little time we have before he takes over, again."

Rachel gave an incredulous laugh. "Jack, weren't you listening when we talked at the hospital? I don't love you -- in fact, I hate you -- so save yourself the embarrassment and leave now before I force your own relatives to remove you!"

"You don't mean that" Jack weakly returned, "I know you don't..."

"Oh, no?" Stubbornly folding her arms, Rachel dared him with her narrowed eyes to prove her wrong, but that was where she made her mistake.

Yanking her forcefully against his chest, Jack covered her soft mouth with his before a stinging slap burned across his cheek, his lips parting from Rachel's as she pushed him away and turned to run in the opposite direction. Promptly seizing her by the wrist, Jack pulled Rachel back into his arms and fiercely crashed his mouth against her own, her true feelings shining through when she linked her arms about his neck and allowed him to heft her up into his warm embrace.

Tongues battling for dominance, the two staggered back until they collided with the side of the barn, Rachel whimpering as Jack groped, pinched, and grasped at her supple form amidst his fervent exploration. Groaning when she began to grind her hips against his arousal, Jack blindly searched for the latch to the barn before lifting it with shaking fingers, Rachel moaning encouragingly into his open mouth as they ducked inside and stumbled into the hay.

Ignoring the sudden pain from the semi-cushioned fall, Rachel whined as Jack licked from her chin to the tip of her nose, his knuckles turning white as he fisted her hair and rubbed his throbbing member in between her legs. He'd waited so long for this moment, and now that he finally had her in his strong arms, he thought he would surely burst.

Fumbling with the buttons to Rachel's blouse, Jack finally gave up on being gentle and forced the garment completely asunder, his mouth growing dry when Rachel's heaving, lace-clad bosoms became exposed to his lust-filled gaze. The indentation of her nipples pressing against her bra made him groan from deep inside his throat, his arousal aching as Rachel parted her lips and released a breathy sigh filled with reckless abandonment.

Reaching in between their bodies, Rachel gently curled her hand about Jack's throbbing arousal and squeezed, his eyes closing in utter rapture as he gritted his teeth and released a strangled curse.

RachelRachelRachel

Thrusting against her open palm, Jack framed Rachel's face with his hands before passionately crashing his mouth against her own, his temperature rising as her other hand traveled down in order to cup his bottom. Her intimate squeezing encouraging him to grind deeper and harder into her awaiting palm, a strangled whimper escaping his throat when she nipped his chin and licked his lips.

RachelRachelRachel

Forcing her mouth back over his, Rachel sucked on Jack's tongue as she rolled her hips up to meet with his, her hands pressing down on his rump so that a delicious friction flared between them. Opening her mouth in a silent scream, Rachel closed her eyes and choked on a moan when Jack thrust repeatedly against her nub, her legs wrapping tightly about his hips so the sensations were deepened.

In all her life, Rachel had never known so much pleasure or felt so much love for one person. The very notion that she and Jack were dry-humping one another inside a barn -- and without anyone knowing, at that! -- turned her on more than she'd ever willingly admit. Weaving her fingers through Jack's hair, she pulled him in for yet another searing kiss, her breath catching in her throat when he unfastened her bra and caressed a tingling nipple.

"Jack" Rachel brokenly pleaded, her eyes closing when he lowered his mouth to her soft mound, "Jack, please..."

Flicking his tongue over her nipple with a mind-numbling amount of sensuality, Jack kneaded her other breast as he nipped and sucked at the sensitive flesh, his arousal tightening painfully within his pants when Rachel gave a soft, breathy moan. Releasing the hard little bud from his mouth with a wet pop, Jack paused in order to remove his shirt as Rachel panted and gazed longingly upon him. Seeing his biceps flex as he did so made her womb ache, her hips shifting in aroused agitation as he then turned his attention to his pants.

"Jack, hurry" she begged, her eyes veiled with anticipation, "I've been waiting for six long years..."

"So have I" Jack huskily returned, his soft gaze never leaving hers as he dropped his pants down to his ankles. Kicking them off to the side to join his shirt, Jack carefully repositioned himself between Rachel's legs before taking her by the hips, his eyes meeting briefly with hers as he pulled her skirt and panties down in one full swoop. As he did so, his breath caught almost painfully in his throat, for he realized that it was the first time in all his life that he was seeing all of her.

"Oh, God" Jack panted, his hands quivering as he placed them back on her hips, "you're so beautiful..."

"Let me see you" Rachel implored, her hand caressing his cheek as he subconsciously leaned into her touch. "It's only fair, after all..."

Smirking at her almost jesting remark, Jack wordlessly rose and pushed his boxers down to his trembling knees, his adam's apple bobbing amidst her intense scrutiny. He knew she was horrified by the hundreds of scars peppering his body, so his shame caused him to jump in surprise when she pressed her soft lips against his navel.

Licking his skin, Rachel gently kissed and nipped at each mark as she tenderly made her way up his torso, her hands framing his face before she nosed his cheek and kissed the more jagged of his two scars.

Jack shuddered since someone was actually touching them (and willingly, at that), his eyes closing as a painful lump formed in his throat that kept him from speaking. He wanted to tell Rachel that he loved her and still wanted to be married, but he knew that she would most assuredly deny him. After all, who in their right mind would ever put themselves in such a dangerous position?

Feeling Rachel's tongue caress his lips, Jack gave a start when she nibbled on his ear and pleadingly whispered, "Make love to me, Jack -- please, we've both been through so much together, and now..." She sniffled. "...Now all I need is you."

Swallowing, Jack felt his body tremble and shake as Rachel pressed a chaste kiss against his mouth, his breath catching in his throat once she took him by the waist and melded their hips snugly together. Feeling her moist desire over his rock-hard arousal made him groan, his teeth gritting when Rachel bucked her hips and dug her nails into his backside.

"Jack, please" she earnestly entreated, "don't turn away from me now when I need you most..."

No longer able to deny her, Jack pulled Rachel by the hair and forced her mouth over his for a deep and bruising kiss. The expression of love was wanton and frantic, both whimpering as they licked, bit, and kissed one another with a passionate desperation. Staggering back against the wall of the barn, Rachel gasped when Jack lifted her up into his arms and balanced her over his stiff member, their eyes locking as he pressed his forehead to hers and gently eased himself inside her quaking tunnel.

Giving a strangled whimper, Rachel closed her eyes and relished in the sensation of Jack filling her to completion, her nails digging into his back as she rolled her hips up to meet with his gentle thrusts.

"Harder" Rachel whispered, her breasts heaving as she breathlessly nosed her lover's cheek. "Please, Jack...harder."

More than willing to comply, Jack steadied her legs around his hips and began to drive into her with an almost animalistic fury. All of his inner frustrations went into his powerful rutting, each stroke dissipating his ire over not being able to have Rachel; over not being able to properly love her.

Gasping as her body continued to smack against the wall, Rachel welcomed the acute pain as she linked her ankles and rode Jack for all she was worth. Sliding up and down his length with breathy little moans, Rachel closed her eyes and no longer felt embarrassment over her passion, her head tossing back as she voiced her pleasure up to the rafters and trembled as she came. Feeling Rachel's inner muscles spasm and clench his member, Jack gritted his teeth before jerking his hips forward and releasing his seed in a burst of liquid fire.

Moaning into the crook of Rachel's neck, Jack unsteadily disengaged himself as his legs began to quiver, his breathing coming in short, soft pants as he dropped down to his knees and kissed her stomach. "Rachel" he whispered, "beautiful, beautiful Rachel..." Kissing beneath her breasts, he rubbed his scarred cheek against her flesh and grasped her hand, his lips falling upon her palm as he breathlessly urged, "Marry me, Rachel...we can go to the courthouse and be married by eight."

"Jack" Rachel miserably returned, "you know we can't do that." Gradually sinking down onto her haunches, she enveloped him within her arms and gently kissed his mouth, her eyes reflecting genuine sorrow as she whispered, "If we went and got married, our problems would still be waiting for us right when we came back. The Joker still lives inside you, Jack, and you can't just expect that to go away."

"Maybe so, but I can fight him" Jack returned in a determined whisper. "I'd do anything for you, Rachel, and for that reason the Joker needs to realize that he's finally met his match."

"Jack..."

"Please don't say no" he miserably interrupted. "If anything, at least give me a chance and say you'll think about it."

Rachel gave him a worried look, but upon seeing the vast flecks of pain reflecting in his eyes, she smiled weakly and nodded. "Alright, I-I'll think about it."

Rejoicing in her response, Jack gathered Rachel up in his arms and laid her down alongside him, his forehead pressing against hers as he and his lover fell asleep with more contentment than they'd ever known.

A/N - Whew, well that was embarrassing...but yay, it's over! Er, until the next chapter, where nothing good can come from this. ;)